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PODCAST

Savage Lovecast

Dan Savage, America"s only advice columnist, answers your sex and relationship questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, record your question and send it to Q@Savage.Love, or call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit savage.love and get yourself a subscription.

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

52:27

Savage Lovecast Episode 937

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/10/15

A lesbian couple has been together for a couple years, and things are still hot between them. But they wonder if they should check out a sex club just to add a little spice. They are monogamous, and have no interest in contact with other women. Their friends say it's impossible to remain exclusive with each other at one of these spaces. Is that true? Would they be welcome? A man with "anxious attachment style" (hot!) has been seeing a woman for 6 weeks, and things are moving fast. She told him she

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46:55

Savage Lovecast Episode 936

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/10/08

An apology is required! But who is in the wrong here? An NB person got so, so sick with the covids. They had already made out with their boyfriend, so he was exposed. When they asked him to come over, deliver some food and offer bit of comfort, the boyfriend only agreed to drop off food outside the door. Should he have come inside and been more supportive? Or was it too much to ask to have him risk exposure? On a much heavier note, a woman's dad was discovered to have a three year-long affair. Then

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49:32

Savage Lovecast Episode 935

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/10/01

A man was flirting with a woman online, but his girlfriend found out. She threw him out, and messaged all their friends and family about the incident. Police were involved. Should they get back together? Dan calls him up to get all the salacious details, and you get to listen. A man has a wonderful fiancé, and they have a child together. He loves her very, very much. The problem? He is one kinky motherfucker, and she is NOT interested in dominating him. On the Magnum, Dan chats with comedian Caleb

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62:54

Savage Lovecast Episode 934

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/09/24

She slept with a lad who didn't wear a condom when he said he would, came inside her and wouldn't help pay for Plan B. The hitch? He's great in bed, and she is hard up. Should she sleep with him again, if he promises to be a good boy? A caller challenges Dan on his personal dislike of massages. "How can this possibly be?" asks the caller. Our guest this week, is the brilliant psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author Esther Perel. Dan and Esther talk about infidelity, how monogamous

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52:06

Savage Lovecast Episode 933

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/09/17

Oh no! He broke the flirting rules. He kissed a lady and lied about it. (He lies a lot apparently.) But now, it makes her sick to look at him. What now? A man and his boyfriend just bought a house together and they are setting up one of the rooms as a nursery...because they are both adult babies. What should they tell visitors if they ask what the locked room is for? On the Magnum, it's the triumphant return of "What Are You Doing?!" A cuckold relationship with a femme-dom twist, you say? Do tell

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52:46

Savage Lovecast Episode 932

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/09/10

A man and his girlfriend are well-matched. Except...she doesn't like to kiss and he NEEDS to kiss to get his erotic motor running. Whatever can they do? The good doctor Barak is back... but this time he's here to share his political giving strategy for this election, where your dollar is mightier than ever. And of course Dan ambushes him with a gnarly sex question. On the Magnum, what happens when a man is jealous of his...mother? Dan chats with whip smart writer Jill Filipovic about

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58:02

Savage Lovecast Episode 931

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/09/03

Git along little doggie! A gay man in academia has always been into cowboys. But he fights his brain, due to the inherently problematic nature of this fetish. Can (or should) he scrub these fantasies from his mind? A woman in Berlin would like to go to Folsom Europe. But would she be welcome? Dan chats with kink educator AJ Berlin about gay male sex party spaces, and who is (and isn't) welcome. On the Magnum, Dan chats with a true unicorn- a monogamous gay man. Don Martin is an author, podcaster

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51:59

Savage Lovecast Episode 930

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/08/27

Workplace intrigue ahoy! A gay trans man who passes completely, is out to some of his co-workers but not all. Over drinks, one of his bosses told him he was bi, but not attracted to male genitals. So was this his way of acknowledging that the caller is trans, and flirting with him? Or was it cluelessly his way of saying he *wasn't* interested? Confusing! What should the caller do? A straight man loved giving his previous girlfriend multiple orgasms. But now that he's single and knows how good it

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50:37

Savage Lovecast Episode 929

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/08/20

A woman is starting up a new relationship. Her previous boyfriend was a dom who introduced her to kink. She loved it but found it all too contrived. How can she take the parts of Dom/sub dynamics she likes and leave the scripted parts behind?It used to take her soooooo long to come. But then she discovered suction toys, and blam! Her husband learned how to get her off orally, but then they divorced. Now she's back to square one and worries it will take another 6 years to train new lovers to get her

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50:37

Savage Lovecast Episode 928

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/08/13

A straight man was horrified to discover that he wasn't attracted to his hook-up when she took her clothes off. She extracted a confession from him, and he was honest about his sudden repulsion. Was this the right thing to do? A woman would like to help her 70 year-old mother choose and navigate dating apps. Dan calls up Joan Price, author of Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex to give the run-down. On the Magnum, Dan chats with our new favorite dom- "The Funny Dom," a 24/7 Daddy

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53:29

Savage Lovecast Episode 927

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/08/06

We start the show with a simple question. Should she sleep with the gardener? Her marriage has become sexless, and though her husband swears he would be into a three-way, she wants to audition the hot gardener first. Some questions require a medical opinion. Some questions are so gnarly that only the most intrepid medical experts will suffice. There is only one man who can fill this role. And that man is Doc Barak. On the Magnum, Dan brings on your next favorite guest, Jeff Guenther a.k.a

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51:37

Savage Lovecast Episode 926

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/07/30

Hear the modern tale of the single mom, who is so committed to raising a "theybie" that she won't let her best friend babysit, lest she take a peek down below while changing diapers. A woman is worried about her brother. He has been sober for a couple years after a traumatic childhood. Now he is dating a woman who just broke up with his pal, who still drinks. They are keeping their relationship under wraps. Will the secrecy and sordid nature of it all suck him back into using? On the Magnum, do

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52:14

Savage Lovecast Episode 925

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/07/23

A woman with the best intentions wants to secretly hire a sex worker for her depressed, newly divorced friend. Any downsides here?Speaking of divorce, Dan gives a long pep-talk to a man struggling with how to get over his. On the Magnum, Dan chats with Dr. Sara Glass, author of the fantastic memoir "Kissing Girls on Shabbat." Dr. Glass was raised in a hyper- religious Hasidic Jewish community. She later came out as queer and completely changed her life. Dan and Dr. Glass had a raw, heart-felt

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51:52

Savage Lovecast Episode 924

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/07/16

A man's new boyfriend had an adult circumcision, and now can't come very easily. He wants to help his boyfriend come, but doesn't want to pressure him. How can he thread the needle and start gobbling? A straight man is in a brat/dom dynamic, where his girlfriend "misbehaves" and then gets "punished" by the caller. They all love it, but now she is also seeing a different man who leaves marks on her body. She showed the caller a photo of herself as a way to elicit his punishment. But he suddenly

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48:31

Savage Lovecast Episode 923

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/07/09

It's the "Overthinking It" episode! "I'll give you $100 if you spit in my beer." This offer was made by a random gentleman in a sushi bar to an unsuspecting lady. She declined. Would you do it? Is anything wrong here? Overthinking it? Meanwhile, a man wonders if the dubious ethics he saw in a porno plot renders said porno too problematic to enjoy. Overthinking it! On the Magnum, we're delighted to welcome Andy Richter to the show. He's best known for his years as Conan O'Brien's sidekick, and now

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0:55

No Show Announcement

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/07/02

Man we're tired. So we went on vacation! No show this week, but we'll back at you on July 9.

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50:11

Savage Lovecast Episode 922

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/06/25

Her husband of ten years is interested in learning about non-monogamy. He started attending workshops about "divine femininity" and "dark masculinity." The workshop leader seems sketchy and cultish to the caller. How can she vet this potential grifter and help her husband develop a little reasonable skepticism?A woman and her husband have been in a poly relationship with another woman for 11 years. She is intertwined with the family and helps out with the kids. You know who also helps with the

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50:04

Savage Lovecast Episode 921

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/06/18

A straight woman wants to explore her bitchy side. She feels like all her edge got sanded away, and now she wants to try out the dom role. How can she find a man who wants a selfish, in-charge lover? Meanwhile, a straight man is frustrated that his lady won't let him go down on her. Our guest this week is Lyz Lenz, author of the NYT best-selling "This American Ex-Wife." Raised conservative Christian, Lenz found herself trapped in a joyless marriage, doing all the work, and getting gaslit like

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48:11

Savage Lovecast Episode 920

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/06/11

Getting a haircut is boring! Unless. Unless your hairstylist strokes your neck, pulls your hair, talks dirty and asks if you want to fool around. A straight man was walking home at night when a drunk man hurled anti-gay insults at him. In a moment of improvised solidarity, the caller said he WAS gay. The drunk found some friends and chased the caller off. Now the caller wonders if what he did was wrong. His gay friend said it wasn't cool to pose as gay. What will Dan think? On the Magnum, Dan chats

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49:44

Savage Lovecast Episode 919

Savage Lovecast ·

2024/06/04

Dan takes on a couple of heavy calls this week- A woman learned that her ex-boyfriend of 8 years was convicted on child pornography charges. He will almost certainly go to prison. He was once her fiancé. Rough stuff. Then, Dan helps a woman make the heart-breaking choice between a single or a double mastectomy. Our guest this week is the sharp, hilarious comedian Jared Goldstein. He and Dan talk about how gay men reject long-haired homos, how straight men don't get "headaches," and definitively

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