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PODCAST

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back

Conor Lastowka and Michael J. Nelson are reading books they"re pretty sure they"re going to hate. Read along with us for a podcast book clubs of Ready Player One, Armada, The Eye of Argon, Dan Brown, and more!

comedy books

All Episodes

19:11

Ep 159 – New Year, New Book! (Book 28: Kaileb’s Dream)

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2024/01/16

Join the 372 Patreon where all the crazy stuff happens! Get every episode a week early, plus our sub-podcast where we try to solve insane Encyclopedia Brown mysteries, and much more! http://patreon.com/372pages Spoiler: frosting is discussed at some length. As are dreams, and if there’s anything more exciting than hearing about someone else’s dream, I’D … Continue reading "Ep 159 – New Year, New Book! (Book 28: Kaileb’s Dream)"

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1:30:26

Ep 158- A Christmas Killer Affair – Ep 2

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/12/26

Thanks to everyone who supported the podcast on Patreon this year. We absolutely would not do it if you weren’t there for us. Join the fun next year! http://patreon.com/372pages We end the year with absolutely blockbuster news. Seriously, a twist so shocking that no cozy writer could ever conceive of it. We won’t spoil it, … Continue reading "Ep 158- A Christmas Killer Affair – Ep 2"

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2:04:56

Ep 157- A Killer Christmas Affair – Ep 1

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/12/20

Support the podcast on Patreon! By the time this posts, we’ll already have posted the next episode on there! http://patreon.com/372pages Time to check in with Murphy, Carmen, Ophelia, Uncle Kidd, Marisol, Granddaddy, Aunt Lucy, Aunt Lindy, Darbie Grimes, Darbie Grimes’ mother, three dead husbands killed in an unknown accident, Simon, Lawrence Galloway, Miquel, Douglas, Judge … Continue reading "Ep 157- A Killer Christmas Affair – Ep 1"

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28:11

Ep 156 – Christmas 2023 Cozy announcement!

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/12/11

Support the podcast on Patreon where they found out what this book is a week ago! patreon.com/372pages In real time, Mike and Conor select their next book – and we guarantee it will be cozy! Select your hugest, fuzziest slippers (preferably cartoon-based), your giant cup of cocoa, we’re talking soup bowl sized with a handle … Continue reading "Ep 156 – Christmas 2023 Cozy announcement!"

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2:26:08

Ep 155 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists Ep...

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/11/29

Support the podcast on Patreon! We have a video tier now so you can see us mispronounce things in real time! http://patreon.com/372pages An absolutely epic end to an epic book. Let’s list them off: giant gorillas, chimpanzees, giant ostriches, gigantic komodo-looking dragons, witch princesses in sheer linen gowns: it’s obvious Larry got a little excited … Continue reading "Ep 155 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists Ep 4 – Slenderman Gorilla"

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2:22:12

Ep 154 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists Ep...

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/11/10

Support the podcast on Patreon, where you’ll get every episode a week early, extra stuff you can’t get anywhere else, contests, and more! http://patreon.com/372pages Incredible – truly incredible – Larry and Denise stuff in this section. The vast majority of this reading could have been submitted as Real or Fanfic and fooled Mike every time. … Continue reading "Ep 154 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists Ep 3 – The Blinding Underground Sun"

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2:05:26

Ep 153 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists Ep...

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/10/30

Join the fun on Patreon, where you get every episode a week early, participate in our discord, and get lots of other stuff you can’t get anywhere else. patreon.com/372pages Like jumping into a waterfall and landing in a Nile River of madness, The Adventures of the Teen Archaeologists (Book 1) The Land of the Moepeks … Continue reading "Ep 153 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists Ep 2 – The Tri-Moepek Cup"

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2:30:09

Ep 152 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists Ep 1

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/10/12

Join us on Patreon, where every episode comes out a week early and you get to hear all the other bonus stuff we only put on there! And check out “The Naked Clone” a book that Mike & Conor co-authored with Kevin, Bill, and Sean from RiffTrax! Yes, a long episode, but this book more … Continue reading "Ep 152 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists Ep 1"

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29:09

Ep 151 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists- Intro

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/10/05

Join the fun on Patreon, where you get every episode a week early and other fun bonus stuff! https://patreon.com/372pages The book is currently unavailable on Amazon, so if you’ve already read your copy, please pay it forward to another listener! To prepare for what we can only assume is an epic reading of Larry and … Continue reading "Ep 151 – The Adventures of the Teen Archeologists- Intro"

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2:30:56

Ep 150 – The Starlight Barking Ep 3 – Roly Poly Does...

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/09/07

Help us pick the next book! We’ll be running a poll on the 372 Patreon: http://patreon.com/372pages The Bark Squad wraps up Dodie Smith’s fever nightmare of a sequel in this final episode covering The Starlight Barking. Sirius the Dogstar visits, promising a lifetime of bliss in outer space. Unfortunately, some whiny mangey strays are all … Continue reading "Ep 150 – The Starlight Barking Ep 3 – Roly Poly Does Paris"

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2:05:26

Ep 149 – The Starlight Barking Ep 2 – Sleeping Devils

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/08/22

Support the podcast on Patreon and get every new episode a week early PLUS access to our entire archive of five years of bonus material: https://patreon.com/372pages We learn a lot of new things in this episode: mostly Mike is terrible at Real or Fanfic! Seriously, all sorts of new rules about physis and metaphysics are … Continue reading "Ep 149 – The Starlight Barking Ep 2 – Sleeping Devils"

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2:06:32

Ep 148 – The Starlight Barking Ep 1: Dalmatians Be...

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/08/04

Support the podcast on Patreon where you can get every episode a week early as well as other fun stuff like Mike trying to solve the world’s most diabolical Encyclopedia Brown mysteries! http://patreon.com/372pages The first full episode of The Starlight Barking goes in, shall we say, some unexpected directions. Lots more talk of pure bloodlines … Continue reading "Ep 148 – The Starlight Barking Ep 1: Dalmatians Be Whooshing"

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25:28

Ep 147 – Book 25: The Starlight Barking

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/07/21

If you were on Patreon, you’d have known what the new book was a week ago! Join the fun at patreon.com/372pages Let’s figure out what the TWENTY-FIFTH book we’re going to read together will be, but first, Conor quizzes Mike on some direct to VHS Real or Fanfic. Link to buy Book 25: https://amzn.to/3NQG5S7 Reading … Continue reading "Ep 147 – Book 25: The Starlight Barking"

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2:12:52

Ep 146 – Artemis – Ep 5 – Bleriana’d

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/06/30

Be the first to find out what’s next by supporting the podcast on Patreon. You’ll also hear a new subpodcast where Mike tries to solve Encyclopedia Brown mysteries: http://patreon.com/372pages We finished Artemis! And we ranked Artemis as compares to all the other books covered in this podcast: you won’t believe what happens next!! And we’re … Continue reading "Ep 146 – Artemis – Ep 5 – Bleriana’d"

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2:12:16

Episode 145 – Artemis Ep 4 – Dale and Bob and Loretta...

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/06/16

Join the few, the proud, the jackals and support the podcast on Patreon! Every episode a week early and other fun stuff: http://patreon.com/372pages The penultimate Artemis episode! Mike’s final attempt at Real or Fanfic has to compete with those red-hot references to Emily Post! Listener’s weigh in and there are Dumb Sentences of the Week. … Continue reading "Episode 145 – Artemis Ep 4 – Dale and Bob and Loretta and Welding"

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2:22:32

Episode 144 – Artemis Ep 3 – Rudy Explained, Kinda!

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/06/01

Join the fun on Patreon, where last week we watched Forrest Gump together, Mike for the very first time! http://patreon.com/372pages Get the book here In this episode: -Spontaneous jackals bearing conspiracy theories -Conor’s appearance on Jeopardy? Premonition? -Insanely difficult Real or Fanfic -Dumb Sentences of the Flexible Time Period -And much more, including this general … Continue reading "Episode 144 – Artemis Ep 3 – Rudy Explained, Kinda!"

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2:20:38

Episode 143 – Artemis Ep 2 – Sean Meets the Morals...

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/05/19

Support the podcast on Patreon! Because of you, Mike watched Forrest Gump for the first time this week! There is nothing that could prepare you for the, ahem, choices Mr. Weir makes in these chapters so may as well dig in. Though we will say Mike slightly improves his fortunes in Real or Fanfic. Get … Continue reading "Episode 143 – Artemis Ep 2 – Sean Meets the Morals Brigade"

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2:15:03

Episode 142 – Artemis Ep 1 – Mounties on the Moon

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/05/04

Thanks to everyone who supports the podcast on patreon! Get the book here What if Garrett P. Serviss dictated a story to Ernest Cline? We think it would go a little something… like this. Plus a Dark Web appearance by a 372 favorite author and an extremely challenging Real or Fanfic! NEXT ASSIGNMENT: Read through … Continue reading "Episode 142 – Artemis Ep 1 – Mounties on the Moon"

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18:07

Episode 141 – Book 24: Artemis

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/04/18

Support the podcast on Patreon, where they’ve known about this new book for a week already! patreon.com/372pages Alright, NOW it’s time for Book 24! This one did very well in our Patreon poll a few years ago, so we’re excited to finally tackle it. But first, Mike listens patiently while Conor rants about Goombas or … Continue reading "Episode 141 – Book 24: Artemis"

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2:23:25

Episode 139 – Edison’s Conquest Ep 4 – Suddenly!

372 Pages We"ll Never Get Back ·

2023/03/24

Find out what our next book is going to be a week before everyone else! Join the 372 Patreon. WOW! Really no words to describe the insane events in the final chapters of Edison’s Conquest of Mars, but we can attempt to sum it up with one syllable; Tom. No Real or Fanfic here but … Continue reading "Episode 139 – Edison’s Conquest Ep 4 – Suddenly!"

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