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PODCAST

Coming Out Pod

Coming Out Pod is a weekly podcast hosted by Lauren Flans where queer folks from all walks of life tell the tales of how they came out to friends, family, and the world at large! Because who doesn"t love a coming out story?

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All Episodes

69:46

Episode 244: Maggie Lalley

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/04/12

Nicole flies solo this week for a WILD ride of a conversation with NYC comedian Maggie Lalley, who took her childhood trauma and turned it into a *hilarious* off-Broadway musical! Sex Witch The Musical covers Maggie's time in, quote, "a two-person teen witch sex cult," and if that sentence doesn't grab your attention...then we are quite simply out of ideas. Maggie divulges an incredible true tale of Albanian witches, bi-locational powers, and even A-List celebrities (kind of)! Plus, Nicole helps

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67:33

Episode 243: Jolenta Greenberg

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/04/05

There's "I didn't realize I was queer!" and then there's "An actual pastor's kid had to inform me that I was queer!" Comedian and podcast host Jolenta Greenberg (How to Be Fine) hilariously falls into the second category. Although Jolenta spent all of high school in blissful obliviousness, the evidence of her bisexuality had been piling up since childhood, notably with simultaneous crushes on LeVar Burton and a female side character on Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman. But despite frequently hooking up

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54:49

Episode 242: Trans Allegories in The Matrix with...

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/03/29

This Friday, March 31st, is Trans Day of Visibility, and we quite literally can't think of a better way to celebrate than with the author of the upcoming book "Begin Transmission: The trans allegories of The Matrix!" When screenwriter Tilly Bridges first saw The Matrix back in 1999, it spoke to her on an incredibly deep level that she couldn't fully understand until about fifteen years later, when she realized that - like the Wachowski Sisters themselves - she was trans. Tilly decided to revisit and

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59:52

Episode 241: Bill Posley

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/03/22

We have a hilarious chat with one of Lauren's old comedy buddies: actor, writer, director, and standup, Bill Posley! As a Black-presenting, Catholic school *and* Baptist Church-attending veteran from a military family, you can probably guess how easy it was for Bill to accept the fact that he was bisexual. He weaves a Tarantino-esque tale that involves answering a classified ad for masseuses, getting clean and sober, and having a surprisingly revelatory coming out conversation with his father. Plus:

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70:47

Episode 240: Avgi Saketopoulou

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/03/15

We have a conversation with psychoanalyst Avgi Saketopoulou that is truly unlike *anything* we've ever broached before. Avgi's new book is called "Sexuality Beyond Consent," and if that title makes you a tad uncomfortable...that's kind of the point. Avgi's work gives new meaning to the idea of "risky" sex by exploring the eroticism around shame, humiliation, and objectification, with a particular focus on the controversial sexual roleplay fetish known as race play. She guides us through an

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57:56

Episode 239: Lilly Brown

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/03/08

Okay: so last month in Episode 234, we had a good ol' fashioned bitch session about how gatekeep-y the Los Angeles queer scene can be. But because we are mature and balanced adults, it seemed only fair to highlight the founder of one queer event in L.A. that is getting it 100% RIGHT! Enter Lilly Brown, the creator and organizer of Queer Field Day! Fostering community has always been a central part of Lilly's life, tracing all the way back to one night in college when she found herself at a queer oil

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70:47

Episode 238: Carolyn Ratteray

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/03/01

At long last: it's actor, writer, director, and educator, Carolyn Ratteray (Outfest 2022's (UN)CLAIMED)! We've been wanting to have Carolyn on the pod for ages, because she and her wife, Kelli, were one of the first poly couples that Nicole EVER met! Carolyn regales us with a twisty-turny story that involves a sleepaway arts camp, a Black Baptist conference on homosexuality, and two *incredibly* prophetic dreams! She also shares how kink helped free her from the residual shame she was carrying from

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48:10

Episode 237: Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week feat....

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/02/22

It's Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week, and our guest (and current med student) Stella is LEARNING US UP on this oft-misunderstood identity! In addition to being aromantic, Stella also identifies as asexual and queer, but it's the first of these labels that most strongly shapes and affects how she experiences the world. Stella discusses how, to her, being aromantic feels like existing on "a different plane entirely," and not at all like "operating from a deficit" - an incredibly important

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55:19

Episode 236: Black Queer History

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/02/15

In honor of Black History Month, we're doing a special episode covering a selection of Black queer trailblazers who are especially meaningful to us! We've put our focus on activists and artists who fly a little bit below the radar, so chances are you won't know most of these folks, but you absolutely should. Lauren finally talks about a singer/songwriter who ISN'T Joni Mitchell! Nicole shares the work of a spoken-word poet who made her heart go pitter patter as a teen! We also recommend present-day

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72:11

Episode 235: Amir Levi

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/02/08

We have a fashion-forward conversation with the OUTRAGEOUSLY stylish Amir Levi! Amir is a non-binary performer who uses the pronouns he, she, and they ("I like it when they get turns, so that none of them feel left out"), and their story has alllll the hallmarks of the late '90s: Coming out to your friend after seeing Scream 2! Guys from chat rooms calling your family's fax machine! Problematic senior yearbook quotes! Your dad offering to buy you porn! Amir explains how two acting roles they were

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67:34

Episode 234: Samee Junio

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/02/01

There are two people without whom the podcast would literally not exist: one is Episode 87 guest Susan Miller, who introduced Lauren and Nicole to each other, and the other is today's guest, the unparalleled Samee Junio, who recorded OUR VERY FIRST EPISODE and heard ALL OF OUR SECRETS! Currently the Senior Audio Producer for Entertainment Weekly, Samee (they/them) grew up the youngest of five children in white, conservative, megachurch-heavy Colorado Springs, and used to change out of the dresses

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60:54

Episode 233: Amir Yass

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/01/25

We chat with the FABULOUSLY queer Amir Yass, a content creator and TikTokker whose self-described job is "to make straight white men uncomfortable!" Amir grew up the child of immigrant parents in a conservative Muslim household in Orange County. How conservative? Let's just say his parents not only pulled him out of sex ed in middle school, they also moved houses because their neighbor was an out gay man. Amir shares how both therapy and comedy have helped him to destigmatize the shame he felt for

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80:59

Episode 232: Avi Roque

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/01/18

We cover some entirely new territory in a candid and vitally important conversation with Avi Roque, who voices Raine Whispers on The Owl House. Like many of us, Avi (they/them) had the ubiquitous "tomboy" label imposed upon them in childhood, and suffice to say it was a long and arduous road from there to their current trans/transmasculine identity. A consummate storyteller, Avi walks us through their entire journey, which includes leaning all the way into ultra-feminine stereotypes during high

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82:02

Episode 231: Kai Katschthaler

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/01/11

In July of last year, Nicole made an Instagram post announcing the adoption of her new puppy, Lily, named for Harry's mother in the Harry Potter series. Kai Katschthaler (they/them), a longtime fan of Nicole's who identifies as trans non-binary, was surprised that Nicole would pick this name due to the J. K. Rowling of it all, and commented something to this effect. Since this was all happening on social media...you can probably guess what ensued. The twist, though, is that Nicole and Kai decided to

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72:54

Episode 230: Pooh

Coming Out Pod ·

2023/01/04

We're starting the new year with a longtime friend of the pod whose *very* distinctive name can be heard each and every week on our list of patrons: that's right, it's Pooh! Pooh hails from Alaska, and is NOT kidding when she says that the story of her life is basically "many, many Lifetime movies." From getting married off at seventeen to a "family friend" who was four decades her senior, to being personally responsible for helping to get domestic violence laws passed in Texas, Pooh has navigated

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86:27

The Bechdel Cast: "Carol" with Lauren Flans and...

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/12/28

We're so excited to be releasing the episode of The Bechdel Cast that we both guested on back in June of 2019! Listen to us discuss allllllll the gay goodness of the *classic* holiday film Carol, and remember: always leave your gloves behind if you want to help a repressed shopgirl have her lesbian awakening.Follow The Bechdel Cast at @BechdelCast, and follow hosts Caitlin and Jamie at @caitlindurante and @jamieloftusHELP (@jamiechristsuperstar on Insta).

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70:32

Episode 229: Listener Mailbag 2022!

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/12/21

HAPPY HOLIGAYS, Y'ALL!!! It's our annual Listener Mailbag episode, and we got *so* many great questions from you this year! We discuss a wide variety of queer queries, ranging from the serious (what to do about transphobic colleagues and how to check in with a loved one re: their mental health) to the sexy! Listen as we share resources and spicy personal anecdotes; plus, Lauren closes out the year by throwing us a GENUINE CURVEBALL. May your holidays be merry and very, very, gay, and we'll see you

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69:25

Episode 228: Lily Zheng

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/12/14

In the past couple of years, the term "DEI" has started popping up *a lot* online, to the point where Googling just those three letters turns up hundreds of hits! However, you would not be alone in admitting that you maybe don't exactly know what DEI...like...is. Fortunately, Lily Zheng (author of the recently-published "DEI Deconstructed: Your No-Nonsense Guide to Doing the Work and Doing It Right") is here to explain everything; not only in layperson's terms, but from a queer perspective! In an

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79:49

Episode 227: Iris Liu

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/12/07

Throughout her adolescence, Iris Liu ticked off a number of familiar boxes: SUPER good ally; "isn't *everybody* attracted to their friends...?"; all the greatest hits. But it wasn't until she fell in with the rugby team at college that Iris finally had her Aha! moment ("It was like, all of a sudden, all my friends were lesbians"). Today, Iris identifies as both queer and polyamorous, but it's been a hard-won journey that's involved, among other things, "trying to break some generational curses."

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64:04

Episode 226: Melanie Cristol

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/11/30

If you've ever wondered what could make a lawyer leave their profession to create the world's first undies for oral sex (and who among us hasn't?), then this is the episode for YOU! Melanie Cristol, Founder & CEO of Lorals, discovered she was queer in college; a realization that so deeply influenced her sense of social justice that she ended up going to law school. As a lawyer, Melanie went to work fighting for people, including on one case with Lambda Legal that brought gay marriage to the Western

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