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PODCAST

A Gay and A NonGay

James Barr and Dan Hudson

In a time where we"re all threatened by a rhetoric of hate from the people in power; A Gay And A NonGay challenges our differences. No matter who you are, or what you"re into, gay"s and nongay"s can & should be friends. "Highly Recommended" Guardian "One of the most fundamentally kind and funny podcasts in Britain" RadioTimes "A hilarious take on love, friendship and sex" TimeOut An independent podcast from James Barr (@imjamesbarr) and Dan Hudson (@DanHudson). Find us on Insta, TikTok, Twitter and

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

23:41

Big Feet, Big... Energy?

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/10/23

Pubs, they're a British institution. But, in this weeks episode of A Gay And A NonGay, James and Dan are exploring the cultural differences between gay and nongay people when it comes to the drinking hole: cleanliness, atmosphere and even drinkware. In non-drinking news, this week we're tackling the contentious phrase "fannying around" and learning and its offensive, historical context. Does the phrase need to (finally) pass away? Plus, can you guess which country leads to a conversation about big

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19:41

Traffic Cones On Your Head

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/10/16

Have you ever put a traffic cone on your head? On this weeks episode of A Gay And A NonGay, we're starting off with a serious (not) debate about headwear, after a listener questioned if gay people participate in this holy ritual. As the conversation turns more serious, James and Dan are discussing female and Queer aggression towards straight men and the use of comedy as a form of protest. When does it all go too far, and when is it completely justified? Follow A Gay & A NonGay TikTok:

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25:18

Humour Is A Great Form Of Therapy with Rob Madge

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/10/09

We are joined by a modern-day icon of the theatre world on this weeks episode of A Gay And A NonGay! Rob Madge first rose to prominence as a child actor, appearing in the West End productions of Mary Poppins and Oliver!. Rob gained mainstream popularity for the WhatsOnStage Award-winning and Olivier Award-nominated autobiographical show My Son's A Queer (But What Can You Do?) in 2023. Rob joins James and Dan for a theatrical episode of the podcast - talking about the role of supportive families and

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18:11

What's Hair Dye Got To Do With It?

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/10/02

Why do gay people always bang on about being themselves... and then die their hair? Homophobia to one side - on this weeks episode of A Gay And A NonGay, James & Dan talk about how personal choices like hair styles and clothing can be used to reflect your true identity.Also on this weeks podcast, we dive into gender neutral bathrooms and self-identification laws after a listener says that they feel unsafe in gender neutral spaces due to past traumas. Should safety concerns outweigh the needs of

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14:26

Are You More Than A Gay Best Friend?

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/09/25

We're back with a new episode of A Gay And A NonGay and this week we're diving into the world of relationships - and all of the complexities that can with them. James and Dan talk about the stereotype of having (or being) a 'gay best friend'. What does it mean, and is it a bad thing? They also debate the idea of ownership between partners, and explore unconventional dating apps like Sniffies and the ethical issues surrounding them. It's all a changing landscape... Follow A Gay & A NonGay TikTok:

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15:42

All It Was & All It Could Have Been

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/09/18

Now that the Summer seems to be officially over (thanks, weather!), us here at A Gay And A NonGay HQ are reflecting on all it was, and all it could have been. Whilst Dan was flying between London and New York, James was at Edinburgh Festival with his new show. But you know what we all were doing? Reacting to Oasis' reunion! Outside of our Champagne Brat summer discussion, James and Dan also discuss the phrase "fannying around" and explore its gendered connotations. It is just out of date... or also

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25:15

It's A Lesbian Renaissance with GIRLI

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/09/11

A Gay And A NonGay is officially back from the Summer break! And we're back with a bang as singer-songwriter GIRLI sits down with James & Dan to talk about the lesbian renaissance in pop culture. We're diving into the history of the term 'lesbian' and the matriarchy, as well as the unique experience of being a Queer woman. Amongst that, the trio talk about the different ways that queer and straight men navigate societal expectations... and we get a sneak peek at GIRLI's upcoming projects and tour

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26:40

From Queer Joy to Rage with Reuben Kaye

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/08/07

Looking for unapologetic honesty? This weeks episode of A Gay And A NonGay delivers exactly that as James and Dan are joined by Australian singer, writer, performer and comedian Reuben Kaye.The trio dive deep into queer culture - addressing the spectrum from Queer joy to Queer rage, as well as Reuben's experience with homophobia and cancel culture. Along the way, we learn about the importance of faking it until you make it, the difference between social dynamics in Australia and the UK and how

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11:53

Dating Whilst Discovering Yourself

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/07/31

Following last weeks conversation about gay stereotypes, this week James and Dan are diving into another myth: that all gay people know each other! Hint: It's, obviously, not true.The question leads onto a conversation about social media habits and the awkwardness that can come with liking people's posts online. This weeks episode of A Gay And A NonGay ends with a discussion around polyamorous dating. James and Dan offer their reflections on navigating relationships whilst discovering

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16:05

Why Do Gays Dance Better? (& Other Stereotypes)

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/07/24

On this weeks episode of A Gay And A NonGay we're discussing two unavoidable questions that have been plaguing the community for years: the so-called 'gay voice' and... why gay people are seemingly so much better at dancing? OK, maybe not.Dan and James tackle these subjects through the lens of internalised homophobia and how stereotypes can lead to feelings of exclusion from the queer community. To prove the point, we try to guess people's sexualities based on their voices (hint: it's not

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24:47

New York vs London Dating with Bright Light Bright Light

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/07/17

We have a special guest on A Gay And A Non-Gay this week... it's 4x Top 20 charting artist Bright Light Bright Light!The Welsh-born, New York-based artist talks with James and Dan about the differences in dating cultures between New York and London as well as the importance of self-love and redefining our perceptions of love and relationships, particularly with the pressures put on love in the LGBTQ+ space. Plus they speak about BLBL's collaboration with Elton John! Learn more about your ad

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15:14

Hell, Toes and Unasked Questions

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/07/10

Talk about twists and turns... this weeks episode of A Gay And A NonGay spans spans from the afterlife to unexpected Grindr encounters in Bali. James and Dan kick off by pondering a fear of going to hell before talking about uncomfortable family dynamics and persistent questions from loved ones. They also tackle a listener dilemma about dealing with a non-accepting grandparent. This weeks episode is somewhere between candid, thought-provoking and moments where you will think "wait... what did you

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17:48

Failed Pop Stars & Dating Someone In The Closet

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/07/03

Pride Month might have come to an end... but every month is Pride Month on this show! Looking back at this years Mighty Hoopla, James talks about the relationship between gay people and 'failed' pop stars as well as the importance of safety and inclusivity at festivals. In this weeks advice segment, James and Dan explore the challenges faced by a listener who is out and dating someone who isn't and how to maintain authenticity whilst supporting a partner still figuring themselves out.Learn more

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24:28

How Do You Know... If You've Never Done It?

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/06/26

This week, James and Dan are tackling listener questions around challenging assumptions about sexuality. In this weeks "Non-Gays Can't Say", Josh from Glasgow asks a provocative question around how you truly know if you're gay... if you've never been with a woman. The discussion shifts to recent comments made by the Pope, leading to a conversation around the complexities of religion and homophobia and there's a listener question about flirty behaviour towards a colleague.Learn more about your ad

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21:50

Why We Still Need Pride Month

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/06/19

With the pendulum swinging and violence towards the LGBTQ+ community on the rise, this week James and Dan are discussing why Pride Month is still so important. They talk about issues ranging from violence to conversation therapy and discriminatory laws, whilst also delving into James' personal experience with domestic abuse and the challenges of speaking out. Advocates and allies have never been more important than right now! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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11:11

When Did "Just Sex" Stop Being Enough?

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/06/12

James and Dan are back with a bonus Dear Queerdrie episode, answering a listener's question: when did 'just sex' stop being enough?Let us know what you think on our socials @gaynongay or email us with your opinions and dilemmas - us@gaynongay.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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26:00

Some Men In London: A Conversation with Peter Parker...

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/06/05

Happy Pride Month! In this episode, James and Dan are in conversation with writer and historian Peter Parker to discuss his new anthology series Some Men In London. The books explore discovered memoirs, letters and documents which depict what life was truly like for gay men in London between the 40s and late 50s.Both volumes are available to purchase now. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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20:40

How To Find Gay Friends In Your 30s

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/05/29

How do you go about making male gay friends as a man in your 30s? Are heterosexual people allowed to use terms like 'top/bottom' and 'pillow princess'? And how does a closeted Hip-Hop MC go about embracing who he really is without risking his career? James and Dan explore it all in this episode. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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24:43

A Conversation with Eurovision's 2024 Winner Nemo

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/05/22

James and Dan caught up with the winner of 2024 Eurovision, Nemo. They chat about how the winning single was created, what's the tea on the dropped trophy and advice for anyone who is non-binary and struggling with their coming out.Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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23:45

Can identity exist without labels?

A Gay and A NonGay ·

2024/05/15

James and Dan use a previous listener dilemma as a starting point for a wider discussion around labels and identity. They also answer the question of why gays and lesbians don't get along. Listen back to the chat with Helen Scott here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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