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LOVERS by shan

Lovers by Shan is an education-first space where listeners come to better understand their own intimate lives through the life lessons and expertise of others. Shan Boodram’s mission is to empower everyone to be their own intimacy expert in the bedroom and beyond by treating guests of the podcast as educators in their own right.Past guests include Kelly Rowland who taught us about being a sensualist. Becky G who shared the importance of healthy love in an unhealthy body. Kerry Washington who

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

73:04

73: This is What it Sounds Like When a Man Cries...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/05/24

We often talk about how men have an easier life, but I think at this point we can also agree that maintaining the identity of “a real man” is extremely hard. Masculinity is what I would call a wet fish identity - because like catching a fish with your bear hands - It’s hard to do, even harder to hold onto and incredibly easy to lose a grip on. And one of the fastest ways to call your capability of holding onto a wet fish into question, is to add more slick to the situation by crying. It’s one thing

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52:18

72: Why Did He Suddenly Lose Interest In Sex? Feat....

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/05/17

Did you know that every 7 seconds, a man thinks about sex? That's more than 500 times an hour and more than 12,000 times a day… And even though that sounds crazy, I’m sure it sounds familiar because this stat has circulated for decades. Now, myth-buster there is no scientific evidence to back this up, and studies that HAVE been done site that men think about sex an average of 19 times a day with the highest number of the study being around 380 thoughts a day and the lowest being once per day (which

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31:02

71: Love At First Sight Almost Sabotaged My Marriage

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/04/26

In this episode, I want to break down what I know about “knowing” someone is the one, before you know their true character. This isn’t meant to knock anyone who chooses to mate this way, because culturally a lot of us subscribe to the importance of instant attraction even if we don’t think we do - but instead to provide you with some knowledge that I wish I had before letting love at first sight lead me astray. Love at first sight is a global phenomenon - meaning no matter where you go, there it is

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54:04

70: When a Man Submits to Her Success feat. Jade...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/04/19

Let’s talk about submission! My fav definition of this comes from Hafeez who simply said to submit is to sub (be underneath) another person’s mission. Now, one of the main purposes of romantic relationships is to be stronger together - a concept we’ve gone into before when we discussed self expansion theory on episode 4 featuring Jeannie Mai. The Self expansion theory states that the best way to expand, together, is to take stock of each other’s strengths, then create a dynamic that aligns with that

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64:42

69: Everything You Pray You Won't Have to Know About...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/04/12

For women in their 30s, 1 in 5 will experience problems conceiving their first child. Deja Riley, our starring guest gives firsthand advice of what it's like to go through over two years of fertility treatments. A grueling experience that's cost her over $20,000 and almost her marriage. In this episode Deja tells all: her experience with IUI, IVF, miscarriage, a chemical pregnancy, eastern medicine, and finally surrender. To keep up with Deja's journey follow

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51:47

68: Family Discussion: Sex, Aging and Our...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/04/05

In this episode, I sit down with my mom and sister to talk about our sex ed growing up and now as parents ourselves, what we believe is the most important lesson to teach our kids when it comes to sex and love... You'll also hear a good bit of a past episode that you can listen to in its entirety here. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lovers-and-friends-with-shan-boodram/id1586679298 I also explain how I plan to bring up conversations about sex to my daughters and what I hope they take away

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36:46

67: Losing Our Baby Broke Me, BUT I Never Told Her...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/03/29

Up to 1 in 4 known pregnancies may end in miscarriage. For many of us, this stat is old news - but as we continue to have this conversation aloud after generations of keeping this pain private - what I do think is new is considering how the father feels about the loss. It seems like a no-brainer, but speaking from personal experience, it hadn’t really crossed my mind until recently. So, let’s talk about it with our special guest Mike Johnson on this episode of Lovers and Friends. According to a

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60:16

66: Saving Our Relationship By Having an Open One...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/03/22

Open relationships. Now, you can clutch them pearls and raise those eyebrows all you want to, but this conversation is not going away - especially not in America. Using two separate samples based on the U.S. Census, researchers found that one-fifth of the population in the United States has engaged in consensual non-monogamy at some point in their lives and if the trend continues, the only place this number is going is up. So… are open relationships the bandaid, the cure or the curse of our

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49:38

65: Becky G Opens Up About Being Sick and Sick and...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/03/15

Becky G is an award-winning, chart topping, international superstar who has always been grateful for her life, but at one point, hated herself and the experience of being alive. In order to get out of that dark place and to get the clarity she needed to heal she knew she needed a superhero, but what she didn’t know is “that hero” would ultimately need to be herself. In this episode Becky G candidly shares how learning to love herself, advocate for her needs and set boundaries has opened up a world

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59:01

64: I'm a Grown Ass Woman Woman Without Any...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/03/08

Does making friends get harder as you get older? How the hell do I make friends? According to the American Perspective Survey, May 2021, a lot of people are not satisfied with the size of their friendship group. About half of Americans (51 percent) report they are very satisfied or completely satisfied with the number of friends they have. 30 percent say they are only somewhat satisfied, and 17 percent say they are not too or not at all satisfied with the number of friends they have. If you

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54:54

63: Sex: Your Steamy Questions with My Husband

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/03/01

In this episode, I am answering 10 questions submitted by YOU, allll about sex! I am looking forward to making more Q+A episodes, so feel free to submit your questions around sex, love and dating. Huge thank you to the sponsors of this episode Ritual Use code Lovers for 10% your order for 3 months. Http://ritual.com/lovers Follow

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63:24

62: It Could've Worked Out But... ft. Lauren Jauregui...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/02/22

Lauren Jauregui talks about breaking things off with Ty Dolla Sign, writing Always Love, holistically healing and then finding real love again with another woman. Lauren Jauregui rose to prominence as a member of the girl group Fifth Harmony, which became one of the best- selling girl groups of all time. Since then, she has gone on to release her solo projects “Expectations” and “Prelude.” Lauren has also collaborated with Steve Aoiki, Halsey, Tainy (Tiny), and Ty-Dolla Sign whom she publicly

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42:41

61: When Your Soulmate Becomes Your Ex

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/02/18

In this episode, I talk about the 10 soulmates we may encounter over the span of our lives. Thanks for being patient with me this week on this episode. Promise to do better! Here are the 10 types of soulmates. The Stranger Soul Mate - unrequited love is still love. We needed them, we loved them, we were certain we were destined to marry them and they barely remember our last name. The black hole Soul Mate - the person that we lost ourselves and our sensibilities to (usually our first requited

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41:40

60: I Thought I Was Straight Until I Met You Feat...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/02/08

Have you ever found yourself attracted to someone of the same sex? How do you navigate re-orienting or re-navigating your sexual orientation after a queer experience? That is exactly what we are breaking down in this episode. Our starring guest is singer, songwriter Kiana Lede. Kiana is an Arizona born actress, singer and songwriter who burst into the scene with her Youtube series dubbed “Soulfood Sessions”. Her cover of Hotline bling went viral in

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45:26

59: Celibutt...Good Lord It's Hard Ft Stephan Speaks

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/02/01

Celibacy, abstinence, sex strike, sexlessness, dry spell ….call it what you may but we can all agree is challenging. This week we are joined by Stephan Speaks- one of the most popular voices in the relationship education space. Stephan has devoted himself to a life of celibacy on more than one occasion: first run with the intention to connect with God, second to connect with his God-given purpose and now he finds himself conflicted between looking for the clarity that celibacy seemed to give him

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62:06

58: If You're Single, You Have to Listen to This Feat...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/01/25

On your journey to find and keep love (if this is your wish) have you ever felt like maybe you are meant to stay single forever? That is how this week’s guest, Glo Atanmo aka Glo Graphics on IG felt throughout most of her life. She was used to not being any man's first choice only to later date 12 quality men at once. Then in 2022, she embarked on her pursuit of finding her forever love. She is now openly sharing her love story with her millions of followers online. In this episode, she breaks

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53:42

57: The Surprising Highs and Lows of Sex and Love(?)...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/01/18

Are drinking games for lovers or losers? Does alcohol make sex better and wetter or dryer and dimmer? A study by Kathryn Lakeland of Femfresh found that 75 per cent of women said they liked to drink before getting into bed with their husband or boyfriend. In this episode we ask those in the 75 per cent to examine if this is a powerful or limiting decision. Many share that alcohol makes them feel confident, flirty and powerful, but also less aware, less excited and more prone to regrettable

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52:57

56: Dangerously in Love feat. Nick Viall

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/01/11

This week's question is : What does it mean to be safe in a relationship? Safety in a relationship looks different for everyone. Our starring guest this week Nick Viall and I talked about a lot, but underneath it, I think this is the core of it… 1) How love hasn’t been safe in the past and 2) how he’s redefining safety within in his new relationship: one that has external threats in the form of public opinion because that’s what fortunately unfortunately happens when two people attempt to share

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32:56

55: The Butt Plug Story that Summarized 2022 + 20...

LOVERS by shan ·

2023/01/05

Who did you become last year? What is something you could not do last year that you want to be able to do by year's end? Shan Boodram shares how 2022 - the most transformative, miserable, lucrative and full year of her life - is grounding her 2023 with these twenty questions in mind. Who did you become? What was the single best thing that happened this past year? What was the single most challenging thing that happened? What is one change you made that improved the quality of your

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54:54

54: Good Sex because of My Best Friend feat. Good...

LOVERS by shan ·

2022/12/14

What happens when you combine love, sex, magic and best friends? In this episode Shan sits down with Erica and Milah, hosts of Good Moms, Bad Choices and together they unravel the goddess experience. What does that look like? How did it happen and most of all…. did it bring them closer as best friends? This episode touches on the importance of platonic intimacy and how through bearing it all with your bestie: the real, the rare, the repulsive and the riveting - can actually make for a natural

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