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PODCAST

What would Brian Bevan say

Want something different than the usual stereotypical Rugby League unschooled, lowbrow, cultureless, inarticulate podcast? Please help us to continue to produce more content by buying us a pint at www.patreon.com/whatbevan

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All Episodes

97:54

S4 Ep92: THE VERY HUNGRY CATERPILLAR'S SUPER LEAGUE DIET

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2022/03/08

It’s a fortnight of mixed emotions following Warrington’s French Connections - but just how long under Joe Philbin’s current metre averages would it take for him to reach the Eiffel Tower? Daniel has the answer. Sam reminisces about 1996 and his bad taste in music, Dennis takes us on a dietary plan fit for Lepidopteras, and Rob’s 72-year-old uncle Bob London provides an alternative commentary. Plus, there’s a Magnum PI quiz that leaves a podcaster’s revision in tatters. And, it’s all froth with no

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98:22

S4 Ep91: BOLLOCKING.....errr ROLLOCKING

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2022/02/21

It's all smiles at the Halliwell Jones as Warrington make it two wins from two. And it's not only the fans in a happy mood - are the players enjoying Daryl's coaching too? Dennis decides it's time to decorate, but loaded-up on his latest supply of sponsored Tiger gin, adopts a mob mentality. With the pressure off Sam's shitistics he delivers more interesting figures than ever before. And Rob questions whether diesel dick may have been on show on the M62. Plus, there's Daniel with his opinion on

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143:40

S4 Ep90: PUTTING THE CART BEFORE THE HORSE

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2022/02/07

It’s a fresh start at Warrington under new coach Daryl Powell, but why is he running with the idiom ‘putting the cart before the horse’? Yes, "What would Brian Bevan say?" returns for a fourth season. So brace yourself for over two hours of your life you'll never get back, as Dennis re-badges his section with a literary theme - but rather than running with a book synopsis decides to painstakingly read aloud in real time. Sam drops the bombshell he’s no longer a season ticket holder. Can he be

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95:43

S3 Ep89: SIMON

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/09/27

After three excruciating years of Price and his Super League failures, the podcast searches for a solution to the ongoing Warrington shit show. Sam considers giving up watching the Wire altogether, and delivers a speech to rival Julius Caesar. Dennis enters all the hard hitting Wolves' problems into his WhatBevan super computer called the logic analytical binary information arbitrator, receiving an answer of pornographic Fitzpatrick proportions. And Rob misses most of the match due to his irritable

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104:58

S3 Ep88: APPARENTLY WE ONLY NEED TO TURN UP AGAINST...

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/09/20

There’s a guest appearance from Wire fan Dom but was he really expecting to see Rob apply cream to his hemorrhoids? Dennis has covid, although he adopts a Price hard-nosed attitude and brushes it off as a resilient cold, whilst Sam misses a home match due to pizza date night with Mrs Sankey. Plus, the Free Bar questions Stephen Hawkings‘ IQ, there’s a quiz, and a nuclear meltdown near Mutiny on the HJ - but can it really be seen from Morecambe Bay? And, apparently, Wire only need to turn up against

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118:35

S3 Ep87: CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE MISSISSIPPI SHOWBOAT...

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/09/08

With Warrington’s third place finish assured, the podcast asks the big questions. Were the ingredients of Sam’s pie at the Huddersfield game a metaphor for Wire’s performance? Will aliens soon be landing on Médecin Marvin Koukash? And why on earth did Rob, in Mr Smiths, pick a fight with Tony Tatupu? Plus, there’s a winner of Steve Price Bingo, a Rugby League human centipede, and a primary source review from the South Stand of a Wolves’ prop. Also not forgetting Mutiny on the HJ’s lifeboat goes

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94:21

S3 Ep86: TO POSTPONE OR TO CANCEL - THAT IS THE QUESTION

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/08/22

Is it postponements or cancellations, and just how many tickets can you roll over? Yes, the podcast embraces yet another week of clusterfuck Super League. Dennis looks closely at essential job descriptions before offering alternatives, all whilst recording at 36,000 feet. Sam is kept up all night after partaking in a Wakefield e-riddled preservative-filled blue ice cream, and Rob considers taking Mrs London to a Michelin starred restaurant with a décor of Tom Lineham’s bollocks. Plus, there’s a lack

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106:15

S3 Ep85: HOW MANY PIXELS IS MATT DAVIS?

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/08/04

With the Olympics in full swing, the podcast puts together its best 10 Wire players to compete in a Decathlon. A refreshing change sees Sam frame his shitistics precisely, unlike the framework of his bay window. Dennis decides a gay anthem pop song fits perfectly to the beat of Warrington's new star George Williams, and Rob discovers just how many pixels make up Matt Davis on a 4K TV. Plus, there's a mermaid aboard the HMS HJ, game reviews, referee calamities, and sex with Dave Woods on a desert

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95:03

S3 Ep84: "DON'T BE A F*CKING IDIOT.. THIS THAT AND...

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/07/14

What would Brian Bevan say returns, but has a long absence, a stint in the jungle and the Euro's left the podcasters with match day amnesia? Sam brings his plagiarised shitistics on George Williams, Rob a pound or two heavier reads a lockdown letter serving up french porridge. And move over Gareth Southgate, as Dennis gives his own uninspiring Grand Final team talk. Plus, it's all-hands-on-deck with Captain Stevie matching player Jake Mamo's Positive Reinforcement Group, with his very own coaching

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92:29

S3 Ep83: AND FINALLY MONSIEUR PRICE, A WAFER-THIN...

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/06/09

Just how thin is Warrington's right-edge defence, Rob asks, before coming up with a list of comparisons. Warning - Sam breaks his record for expletives, and Dennis becomes all confused following a dose of Bermuda amnesia. Brace yourself for Daniel's soundbite, and strap-in for high seas on HMS HJ. Plus, there's a brawl at the free bar, and the real story behind the failure of the 1970's American Rugby League dream. Enjoy.

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84:26

S3 Ep82: TOBY KING HOODWINKED BY 0.6%

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/05/29

With Wire’s marquee halfback full of beans, Warrington become the most attacking side in Super League, but has Toby King been hoodwinked by Simon Moran’s percentages? A homesick George turns out to be a dead ringer for a Canadian snooker player. Sam goes in search of a 1980’s discotheque, Dennis opens a free bar, and Rob questions a player’s penis through the reflection of a convex or concave coffee machine. Plus, Mutiny on the HJ goes missing at sea in the Bermuda Triangle. Enjoy.

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85:09

S3 Ep81: SAM'S DOG REFUSES TO URINATE ON GREG INGLIS'...

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/05/19

With fans back at the Halliwell Jones cheering on the Wire, the podcast ironically has no applause for Stevie’s team selection. Rob finds himself babysitting as his 6th wife deserts him for Eurovision. Dennis bathes in his fails and unexpectedly massages in Imperial Leather. And Sam’s dog senses an upset, following its scent-less antics. Plus, Chris Sandow contacts the pod and HMS HJ drops anchor in the Caribbean. Enjoy.

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84:30

S3 Ep80: THE OLIVIER AWARD

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/05/12

There’s rumours a-plenty on this week’s podcast, which leads to another jingle. But if that’s not enough, the pod is joined by YouTube star Jake Lindsay from the Warrington Foundation. Rob blows his top following hate mail on Twitter. Sam’s shitistics go on for that long Jake turns to his phone. And Dennis loses the plot with a soundbite clusterfuck. Plus, HMS HJ heads for the Rock of Giblets. Enjoy. Jake's YouTube Channel https://youtube.com/channel/UC9B1Lf2MdUNy1iT1YsjH3lg

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69:01

S3 Ep79: UN PASSEPORT FLOCONNEUX

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/04/28

It’s an apologetic podcast following Warrington’s magnifique performance, as the lads try to butter up their predictions from the previous week. Sam’s shitistics prove we’ve found our fourth prop, but ridiculously only one player can score down the Wolves’ right edge. Rob becomes an advocate for intermated player breeding. And Dennis goes in search, according to Sky’s commentary, of Warrington’s new player Greg Austin’s passport. Plus Madame Boyd returns with a new apprentice in her chippy, and

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74:51

S3 Ep78: HACKED OFF WITH AN OUR LEAGUE DRAW

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/04/21

What would Brian Bevan say reviews two games in the company of blogger Daniel. But will the intrusion of an extra podcaster lead to another Iranian Embassy siege? Rob’s obsessed with points percentages and the fluid / nut ratio of Tom Lineham’s bollocks. Sam takes his stats to Albania. And Dennis’ social golden point distancing comes into question whilst oblivious to firewalls. Plus, Mutiny on the HJ gets tugged off from Jiffy. Enjoy.

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66:48

S3 Ep77: JUST HOW SHIT ARE LEIGH?

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/04/05

After Warrington come up with a convincing win, the podcast questions just how shit are Leigh? Rob receives a letter of complaint but Carry’s On with his themed teams. Sam puts all his Wire golden boy posters back up. And Dennis fails to breakdown the molecular structure of a Flake, as he unexpectedly turns up the heat on Blake. Plus, HMS HJ outmanoeuvres a Primrose submarine. Enjoy.

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82:16

S3 Ep76: MIKE COOPER'S NEW SEISMOMETER HAIRCUT

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/03/31

After an abysmal opening Wire performance, the podcast goes in search of the answers to what went wrong. Sam's positivity towards Price wanes a numerical point, Rob investigates a specifc Doctor's Hippocratic Oath, and Dennis sits on his bench as he fails to explain the unexpected. Plus, there's Mutiny on the HJ and the Powell of Love. Enjoy.

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93:12

S3 Ep75: ROEBUCK'S ONLY A SAUSAGE DOG SMALLER THAN...

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/03/15

With Wire’s first game not too far away, the podcast returns for a third season. The Classification Universal Numerical Tariff Society predicts the Super League top eight. Rob offers up his thoughts on a Ugandan dictator who would make an excellent prop, Dennis‘ Tackle Bags is replaced by Fails or the Unexpected, and Sam gets all lost at sea with the new “What would Brian Bevan say?” sitcom - Mutiny on the HJ. Enjoy.

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39:39

S3 Ep74: PREXIT

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2021/02/19

With the announcement that coach Steve Price's resilient stay with Wire is set to finish come the close of the 2021 Super League season, it's time for a Prexit debate. Joining the three usual podcasting clowns are headband wearing Dave Birch from Warrington Hospital Radio, the gorgeous Matt Turner from Warrington Guardian and some geezer called Mike Brown "innit!" . Enjoy.

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93:29

S2 Ep73: TONY BARROW - CHRISTMAS SPECIAL

What would Brian Bevan say ·

2020/12/26

It comes with great pleasure to welcome Tony Barrow to the podcast. Tony coached the brilliant Wire side that won the Premiership in 1986 - when it really was "Our Year". Merry Christmas everyone. Enjoy.

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195 results

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