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Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog

Pixelated Sausage

A site about all things geeky and/or artsy. Seriously, how can you not love a site called Pixelated Sausage?

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Goat Simulator - It's Kinda Baaaaaaaaaad | Attack the...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/12/17

This episode of Attack the Backlogis all about Goat Simulator, a game where you simulate being a goat by licking everything you can see, headbutting everyone until they pee, and wrecking general chaos with a face full of glee, even though you’d much rather be playing General Chaos for Genesis...or maybe that’s just me.

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Heaven Dust - All It Is Is Dust in the Wind | Attack...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/12/03

This episode of Attack the Backlogis all about Heaven Dust, a game that takes inspiration to a whole new level, copying Resident Evil to a T…virus, from the key art to the gameplay to the structure to the story to the window…to the wall, ‘til blood drip down them walls, all these zombies crawl, y’all shoot shoot shoot shoot them in the head, y’all shoot shoot shoot shoot they dead. Or something like that...

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The Dark Pictures Anthology: Man of Medan - More Like...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/11/19

This episode of Attack the Backlogis all about The Dark Pictures Anthology: Man of Medan, a game where you play as a bunch of rich kids trying to find buried treasure because, despite being rich, they’re not rich enough to pay for all the plastic surgery it would take to make Julie go from hideous monster to the madame of meDAMN girl, you fine. But then some dumb pirates, a boring ghost ship, and a thirsty grandma ghost show up to ruin all the fun. Not comedy, nor horror, ensues, or

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Paratopic - I Don't Know What I Played, But My God, I...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/11/05

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Paratopic, a game I can't quite explain, where jump cuts are plentiful as you play; a game you could finish in just one day, in just one sitting, in fact, I say; a game I recommend despite my haze, for fans of David Lynch, Twin Peaks, and his crazy ways; a game I played, that you can play, so I say, not tomorrow, but today; if I were to give it a grade, I'd quote the Fonz, and give it an aaaaay.

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Terminator: Resistance - A Good Terminator...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/10/22

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Terminator: Resistance--aka, Terminator: Resources--the game where you pick up everything you can see because, "Oooo, look, so shiny," and are marked for termination because you never learned that sharing is caring. You also shoot the occasional robot and have awkward sex, but the majority of the game is collecting all the shit you can find so you can craft goods and earn currency for buying goods–goods like ammo, health packs, and

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The Walking Zombie 2 - Sometimes Good Enough Is......

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/10/08

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about The Walking Zombie 2, a first-person shooter where you go on short missions to kill all the zombies, or missions to collect goods and kill all the zombies, or missions to find buried treasure and kill all the zombies, or missions to defend your home base and kill all zombies, or even missions to rescue kidnapped survivors and kill all the zombies (or sometimes all the bandits), and so on and so forth. It may sound repetitive (because it is), but

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Hyper Gunsport - When Xbox Surprises Go Wrong |...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/09/24

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Hyper Gunsport, a cyberpunk volleyball game where hands are replaced with guns (not literally) and enjoyment is replaced with the opposite of fun (yes literally). Despite some nice visuals and an alright idea, Hyper Gunsport doesn't live up to its potential thanks to poor controls and a general lack of excitement that left me feeling zero desire to keep playing after completing one run on the circuit. I'm not saying it's a terrible game, but it could

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Bowser's Fury - I'm Not Furyous, I'm Just...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/09/10

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Bowser's Fury, the additional content included with the Switch port of Super Mario 3D World, where Mario gets his very own harem of pussy(cats) while also getting his Powers Rangers in super-sized battles against kaiju Bowser in extra large Cat Mario form, all of it set in a moderately-sized open world as opposed to being level-based like your more traditional Mario game. I should have realized this sooner, but with Bowser's Fury, I finally realized

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Police Chase - It's...It's...It's Not Good. (Imagine...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/08/27

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Police Chase, a game where you play as the police and chase NO ONE until the last few missions, where you’re stuck chasing super cars in your stupid and slow police van because no one told you you could walk out of your car and into a different, shiny, fast one, except maybe they did and you just weren’t paying attention due to being distracted by all the terrible voice acting, including a waitress who loves singing country music and

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The Crew 2 - If I'm Playing It Wrong, I Don't Wanna...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/08/13

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about The Crew 2, a game where you can drive, fly, or boat yourself through an incredibly truncated and disproportionate version of the United States, all in the pursuit of completing numerous events that fill the map with more icons than anyone could ever hope to complete because when you say icon, I say, “Icon’t.” And to that point, I love The Crew 2, but not for the reason you might and probably expect, so if you want to know what makes

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Vampire Survivors - More of a Game of the Day or Two...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/07/30

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Vampire Survivors, a game that sucks away most of the controls so you can watch numbers explode…eventually…because, oh my, does Survivors start slow. Vampire Survivors is a game that asks very little of you input-wise, but demands all of your attention–a bit of a weird dichotomy–but if you take the time to learn its intricacies and, for the love of god, only play on Hyper Mode (once you unlock it), I think you’ll have a

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The Simpsons: Hit & Run - Too Much D'oh! in the...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/07/16

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about The Simpsons: Hit & Run--the game many called, "Grand Theft Simpsons," but is really just, "The Simpsons: Road Rage 2: Now You Can Get Out of the Car, Too," not to rhyme 2 with too, but I did, like I do, so poo of me, and sorry to you.Does that sound like a good time? Do you think I had a good time? All those answers and more can be found with a quick watch or a quick listen, so sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride that is...Attack the Backlog.

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G.I. Joe: Operation Blackout - No Joe! No | Attack...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/07/02

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about G.I. Joe: Operation Blackout, "a team-based third-person shooter where you play as your favorite characters from Team G.I. Joe and Team Cobra. Experience the action from both sides as you help G.I. Joe restore order and lead Cobra to world domination." Does that sound like a good time? Do you think I had a good time? All those answers and more can be found with a quick watch or a quick listen, so sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride that is...Attack

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Transformers: War for Cybertron - Can I Get Some...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/06/18

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Transformers: War for Cybertron, a third-person shooter set in the Transformers universe before they made their way to earth, meaning there's sadly no Shias or Marky Marks in sight. Also not in sight is ammo thanks to a baffling ammo system that's guaranteed to annoy everyone who dares play this game. If that's not enough, also missing is color, something that would have gone a long way in making War for Cybertron at least pleasant to look at--it

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Big Rumble Boxing: Creed Champions - Junk Food at...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/06/04

Most of you will be shocked to hear that Big Rumble Boxing: Creed Champions isn't that bad. I sure was when I played the game; however, that initial positive shock was followed by a much greater negative shock: the price tag. As surprisingly not terrible as Big Rumble Boxing is, it's got a significant lack of content problem. Based on what's there (and what's not there), one would assume Big Rumble Boxing was a $10-15 game and not the $40 game it actually is, so unless it's on sale, there's no

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CrossfireX - I Am Dead and So Is This Game, Signed,...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/05/21

I could try and find something to say here--something, anything of value--but I've got nothing, which is quite suiting since CrossfireX also has nothing--no fun, no content, and, oh yeah, no more existence either. This is not a traditional episode of Attack the Backlog and CrossfireX is not your traditional Attack the Backlog game/experience; however, it is what it is and that's about as much as I can say about CrossfireX, or, more accurately, this is what it was (because, again, it no longer

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Picross S - Nonogram? More Like Yesyesgram! | Attack...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/05/07

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Picross S, a picture crossword puzzle game that's strength is in its simplicity, providing enough challenge to engage the brain while never becoming too challenging to frustrate. It is thanks to this that it is one of the most relaxing and enjoyable puzzle games I've played in years; I only wish I didn't wait so long to finally get to the series, but you know what they say, better late than never, eh.

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The Smurfs - Mission Vileaf - A Smurfingly Smurf Urf...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/04/23

This smurf of Attack the Smurflog is all about The Smurfs - Mission Vileaf, a 3D platformer with vibrant, colorful smurf, pacing that keeps things feeling smurfy throughout, and a smurf that feels good, which, let’s be honest, is the most important smurf of all. But don't just take my smurf for it, give this smurf a smurf or smurf and I'm sure you'll smurf exactly what I'm smurfing about...

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I Don't Know What to Say: A NERF Legends (Kind of)...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/04/09

I wish I suffered from memory loss so I could forget ever playing NERF Legends; however, I'm at a loss for words instead. I honestly don't know what to say. NERF Legends is bad. It's not kind of bad, or, "so bad it's good," bad, it's just bad-bad. Without a single redeeming quality, NERF Legends is indeed a thing of legends as it will forever be one of the worst games I've ever played for Attack the Backlog. Don't believe me? Well, I won't stop you from playing the game yourself, just don't come

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Short, but Sweet, When Not Racing on the Street: A...

Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog ·

2023/03/26

I honestly can't think of anything to say and it's driving me a bit insane, so I'm just going shut up and let this here episode do all the talking as I turn around to escape my brain with a bit of fast walking; however, let me say one thing before I go: Wave Race 64 is a good time and a Nintendo 64 game that holds up as not just okay, but surprisingly great. And with that, I’ve nothing left to say, so bid you adieu I shall do with the opposite of “Hey” and the movement of my hand

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Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog

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