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PODCAST

Permission To Be Human

Janelle and Andrea

Welcome to Permission to be Human! --- We"re Andrea and Janelle--two midlife mavericks sharing openly about our own experiences--messy AF and no regrets----with marriage, divorce, polyamory and pleasure. You"ll hear from relationship experts, meet real life Bravehearts and get intimacy skills. Truth: When we"re brave enough to ask for what we want, honor our boundaries and have the hard conversations--with partners, friends, family and, most importantly, ourselves--magic happens and happiness

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

33:32

48: Online Dating Part II: This is How We Do It

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/05/21

It’s Friday night….and I feel alright. Dating apps again! Yes, for real. Janelle and Andrea share their own experience with logistics, strategy, profiles, methodology and why being direct is best. You’ll hear: -Why saying “Thanks But No Thanks” is a sign of respect -Profile ideas (they read theirs on the podcast!) -The definition of Sapio, Demi and RBDSM -Why they prefer daytime dates -How to put less pressure on the whole damn thing --------------- Get ready for some real-time relationship woo and

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45:43

47: Online Dating Apps Part I: The Good, The Bad &...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/05/14

Janelle and Andrea talk online dating apps at mid-life and how much more invigorating they can be when you know who you are, you know what you want and you don’t have to check so many damn boxes. There’s a nod to the definition of a Braveheart, an invitation to Janelle’s intimate retreat at the Goddess Temple and a mention of our favorite dating apps, including OkCupid and Feeld. You’ll hear: ‌-Why dating apps serve as a reflection of your own evolution -The different--and valid--reasons we got on

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36:37

46: BDSM Surprise: Less Fear & Judgement, More...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/05/07

Think you know what BDSM is? Think again. Andrea interviews Janelle about her training to be a Pro-Domme and the resulting deep dive into her psyche. They talk archetypes, pain, ritual theater, spiritual growth, the containment of energy and the freedom possible when you’re allowed to desire what society told you not to. Nod to Om Rupani and The Matrix. You’ll hear: -Where BDSM and Burning Man intersect -Why dominant and submissive are not hierarchical -The difference between non-consensual and

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32:41

45: Wanna Feel Less Alone? Ask for Help

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/04/23

Do you know how to ask for help? Is it a challenge for you? In this sweet, bite-sized episode, Andrea and Janelle break down very simple human experience, offering personal stories, useful steps and a convincing argument for why asking for help makes the world a more connected place. Includes a nod to the movie “Enough Said” and the book “The Field Guide to Getting Lost” by Rebecca Solnit and Betty Martin’s Wheel of Consent. You’ll hear: --Why asking for help is a skill and a gift --A framework

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43:58

44: Menopause: We Get Real with the Pleasure & the Pain

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/04/16

Janelle and Andrea take on menopause. Doctors may not have the answers, but women’s collective wisdom does. Can we embrace this time as a sacred life cycle and an opportunity for rebirth? Can we share our stories more? Hear a transparent dialogue about symptoms, frustrations and what worked for us. Includes a nod to Anita Diamant’s book “The Red Tent”, a quote by Ursula K LeGuin, the podcast We Are More Than Menopause and Isabella Rossellini’s article about getting denied by Hollywood after age 45

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39:33

43: Soul Contracts, Seasons & Letting go of Form:...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/04/09

How long should friendships last? Can you honor the present without projecting onto the future? Janelle and Andrea have a real-time recognition of their own relationship and dissenct the end of another. In the process, they invite Brave Hearts to embrace impermanence. There’s a nod to The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman’s Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships by Harriet Lerner. You’ll hear: -Why some friendships need to end to make room for another -How marriage and friendship is

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37:32

42: Married & Poly, Eight Years In: Why Andrea’s...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/04/02

Andrea & Janelle still consider themselves polyamorous. In this episode, Janelle interviews Andrea about the benefits, what she misses about monogamy, the triggers that have disappeared, the triggers that still remain and what it’s like to have no outside partner when your husband still does. There’s a nod to Jerry McGuire, The Way Knows The Way by Lyndsey Scott and Rhaina Cohen of the New York Times. You’ll hear: -How little she misses about monogamy -The relief, purity, clarity and validation

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43:16

41: Our Attention is a Valuable Resource: How to...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/03/26

Our Attention is a Valuable Resource: How to Locate Your Energy Leaks & Let them Go! How frequently and frivolously do you give away your energy? Do you have a leak? Are you carrying too many keys around? Could your backpack and your mind be lighter? As a Mom, are you helping or enabling? Janelle and Andrea urge the Brave Hearts to protect their attention. Fun nods to Tim Ferris, Humans of New York and Rachel Rodgers’ “We Should All Be Millionaires” and more. You’ll hear: -Why Andrea

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35:55

40: A Spirit-Son, Namesakes & a Right-Finger Ring:...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/03/19

A Spirit-Son A Namesakes & a Right-Finger Ring: How Janelle Did Family her Own Way When Janelle got divorced, she kept her married name. And she does not have kids. Andrea wanted to know why. Thus began the flow of conversation about why we change our name, why we don’t, the power of that little ring around our finger and the debunking of some very traditional assumptions about marriage. Includes a nod to ayahuasca, the Antwerp Diamond District and East of Eden. You’ll hear: -Why Janelle considers

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47:58

39: Vices, Escapes & Addictions: Pleasures Need Not...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/03/12

Vices, Escapes & Addictions: Pleasures Need Not Be Guilty! What if pleasures didn’t have to be guilty? Janelle and Andrea discuss their own navigation of various vices over the years including sugar, nail-biting, social media, alcohol and television…then discuss mindfulness, addictions and impulse control for good measure. And there’s a nod to Glennon Doyle, Sam Harris, GI Joe, The Today Show and Little House on the Prairie. You’ll hear: -How Andrea turned Acts of Productivity into a reward -Why

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41:15

38: Morning Rituals, Altars & Moon Parties: How Woo &...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/03/05

Morning Rituals, Altars & Moon Parties: How Woo & Wellness Work Together Altars aren’t just for church and rituals aren’t just for cults. Find out more as Janelle and Andrea discuss how these elements offer meaning, consistency and, most importantly, space to look within. Includes a nod to Indian Palm Leaf Reading, Waldorf, Myka MCloughlin, Cynthia Morris, Jim Gaffigan, the New Yorker & Braveheart. You’ll hear: -Why Janelle drinks cacao every morning -Permission for your ritual to be loose and

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47:21

37: A Discussion on Death: Rituals, Drones & Serial...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/02/27

A Discussion on Death: Rituals, Drones & Serial Killers Janelle and Andrea take on life and death, one breath at a time, discussing end-of-life care, examining how society successfully evades the topic, and considering the sentence: “if we die before we die, then we don’t have to die when we die”. Includes a nod to cemeteries, cruises, Joan Didion, Natalie Goldberg, The Lower Fifth, Meggan Watterson, Paul Kalanithi, “The Wreck of Time” by Annie Dillard and Atul Gawande’s Being Mortal. Also “Let Go”

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26:12

36: Pussy Readings & Foxy Ladies: Getting Joyful &...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/02/21

Pussy Readings & Foxy Ladies: Getting Joyful & Curious About Genitals Recently, Janelle got a Pussy Reading. No, really. Sound revolutionary? It is. Based on physical attributes, Quodoushka helps you understand your genitals so you can deepen connection and expand your pleasure. It ALSO elevates the way we think about our pussy! What if we gave it reverence? What if we honored its beauty and unique style? You’ll hear: -An unexpected way to deepen sisterhood -Why knowing your pussy can you help boost

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40:52

35: Trigger Warning: Janelle’s Journey from Feminist...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/02/13

Trigger Warning: Janelle’s Journey from Feminist to Feminine Are you a feminist? Are you sure? What does it mean to you? Janelle and Andrea dissect their own definitions, share their experience with feminine and masculine energy and invite listeners to honor the qualities of both. Includes a nod to Planned Parenthood, HDFS, Kate Chopin, Animal House, David Deida, Alison Armstrong & Om Rupani. You’ll hear: -Janelle’s journey form militant to post-modern feminism -Andrea’s frustration with feminism &

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51:53

34: What it Means to Invest in your Radiance: Sleep,...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/02/06

What it Means to Invest in your Radiance: Sleep, Massages & $1000 Coats Ever heard the phrase “in your radiance”? It’s one of Janelle’s favorites and she’s learned that investing time and money in her own radiance is not a luxury, but a necessity. Andrea dishes about her evolution as a shopper and how she now dresses from the inside out. Includes a nod to thrift shopping, TJMaxx, Rising Frequency, Finland and Leave the World Behind. ‌ You’ll hear: ‌ -What it means to be in your radiance -Why Andrea

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42:52

33: Divorce One Year Later: Finances, Freedom &...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/01/23

Divorce One Year Later: Finances, Freedom & Letting Go of Form Divorce was the one thing Janelle was never going to do. But one year later, she’s not only surviving, but thriving. In this episode, Janelle shares how this experience freed her from limiting financial beliefs and expanded her definition of who to call on in a crisis. Choosing herself first allowed her to appreciate all the ways her ex-partner showed his love. Includes a nod to Christmas onesies and late-night Walgreens pharmacy runs

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38:13

32: Your Evil Twin vs. Your Inner Witch: Who Do You...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/01/16

Your Evil Twin vs. Your Inner Witch: Who Do You Listen To? Janelle interviews Andrea about the five ways to discern the voice of your Ego (what Andrea calls her Evil Twin) from the voice of your Calling (what she calls her Inner Witch). So juicy. You’ll hear why your Evil Twin is all about anxiety, attainment, doing and burnout, while your Inner Witch is all about silence, journey, being and fulfillment. Includes a reference to spirit crowns, Fight Club, 3-5 Club, and a story about white water

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32:41

31: 14 Lessons From 2023: The Magic & The Mundane

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/01/09

14 Lessons From 2023: The Magic & The Mundane Before we choose a word for the new year (yawn), let’s reflect on our lessons in 2023. Andrea found joy where the collective and individual meet. Janelle learned that investing in her radiance is a not a luxury but a necessity. Includes a nod to silent disco, sleep hygiene, the movie Rocky, cardamom and BDSM. You’ll hear: -Why we love glitter and “glimmer” -How Janelle has increased her capacity for love -Intense love is totally okay--as long as

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45:29

30: Woo, Wealth & Debt: How to Listen to Your Soul...

Permission To Be Human ·

2024/01/02

Woo, Wealth & Debt: How to Listen to Your Soul and Pay The Mortgage Mixing woo and wealth, Andrea dives into Janellle’s financial journey, from a modest Long Island upbringing where spending money was “not a pastime” to post-divorce era where she’s struggling to pay a $7500 mortgage. Includes references to Vidal Sassoon jeans and authors Bruce Lyons and Lynn Twist You’ll hear: ‌ -The soul, spirit and personality of money -Why it’s (perhaps?) no longer taboo to dip into your Roth IRA -How to

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50:15

29: Life Lessons: Bulgarian Hospitals, the Blue...

Permission To Be Human ·

2023/12/19

Life Lessons: Bulgarian Hospitals, the Blue Lagoon & Beautiful Hitchhikers Janelle and Andrea glean lessons about relationships, instincts and privilege through stories about unexpected intruders, Everest base camp strangers, currency exchange mistakes, vision quest seekers and a husband’s ex-girlfriend. Can you find the meaning in even the messiest of situations? They definitely try. Includes references to Ally McBeal, Rock Bottom and mouth-taping. You’ll hear: -How Janelle felt less alone once her

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