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PODCAST

Malt Couture

After 7 years of being anonymous, 1.5 million words written about beer, and preaching the gospel of Barleywine is Life, Don"t Drink Beer"s Alex Kidd gets into the deep, dark world of podcasting. Joining him are his co-hosts, comedy writers and performers Stephen Loh and Michael Gabriel. Together they explore the absurd underbelly of the craft beer world while also discussing movies, music, video games, pop culture, and their sad, basement dwelling lives.

arts food

All Episodes

01:56:14

Batch 197: Now With More Dracula!

Malt Couture ·

2022/04/07

Ask and ye shall recieve, blah! Dracula's back thanks to a 5-star review. Will he be bringing any other classic Maltyverse characters with him, blah? In the Beer News, the Stone vs Keystone trademark infringement case is done and the jury has awarded $56 million to Stone, meanwhile, Old Bay announces they'll be releasing a vodka. Then it's another double barleywine episode when Alex brings in malty treats from Trophy Brewing and Private Press Brewing. Michael brings in "soda." Stephen asks you to

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01:48:43

Batch 196: Alex and Stephen Ride Again!

Malt Couture ·

2022/03/31

Alex and Stephen hold down the malty fort as Michael's away on another vacay. The Stone vs Molson Coors trial enters it's third week, Buffalo Trace gets into NFTs, and Trappist Rochefort adds a new beer to their roster for the first time in 60 years. Alex brings in a double barrel banger from Cerebral Brewing, then in the Bottle Share, the boyz channel their inner Meady Boyz™ while Stephen brings in a shelf turd that ends up being very polishable. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content

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01:36:09

Batch 195: The Side Project Cinnamon Shootout

Malt Couture ·

2022/03/24

Alex scours the trade groups and Side Project's La Coterie club to assemble a line up of Cory King's hottest cinnamon creations. The Malty Boyz™ end up lining up 6 Side Project cinnamon beers to knock down. Beers include Derivation Blend 9, BVC (collab with Cycle Brewing), For Phil, Symmetry (collab with Crooked Stave), Continuance Blend 2, and Shared Ambiente. It's a high noon cinnamon shootout! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer Get the Malt Couture

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01:44:05

Batch 194: Basement Bottle Shares

Malt Couture ·

2022/03/17

Gather 'round the weather beaten coffee table we found out on the street three years ago, it's time for a classic basement bottle share in mom's basement. This time we're pouring beers from Oozlefinch, Against the Grain Brewery, Blue Moon, and North Park Beer Co. Mom! WHERE'S THAT DEEP DISH PIZZA? MOM! MOOOOM!!!! No, I told you, just give me a Visa gift card for my 37th birthday and keep me on the family phone plan! Yes, this is my best friend. No, we know each other from the internet. 3 months ago

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01:58:57

Batch 193: Kill... Blastoise...

Malt Couture ·

2022/03/10

Michael buys Elden Ring and treats it like Pokemon and all hell breaks loose at the Pokemart. In the Beer News, the Malty Boyz™ finally get to try beer from Kings & Convicts and follow up on the Threes Brewing CEO stepping down. Alex brings in a component blended barleywine from Cellarmaker then doubles up for the Bottleshare with a barrel-aged American barleywine and it's base beer from Solemn Oath. Stephen gets his San Diego fix with an offering from Societe Brewing Co. Thanks to Lua Brewing for

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01:53:47

Batch 192: Record Profits and Twitter Meltdowns

Malt Couture ·

2022/03/03

Being courageous means hiking up your prices according to Heineken, who posted record profits in 2021. Meanwhile, local breweries can't price a pilsner for more than $7 without drawing outrage. Threes Brewing CEO compares vaccine mandates to Nazi Germany on Twitter and promptly draws the ire of the internet before starting a Substack to explain himself. Does not end well. Alex brings in a barrel-aged stout collab between 7venth Son Brewery and VooDoo Brewing then showcases a Helles from Dovetail for

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02:15:35

Batch 191: The Millennial Commercial Bowl

Malt Couture ·

2022/02/24

The Big Game has come and gone and The Malty Boyz™ once again sit down with Mike Costello to break down all the beer commercials that aired. Alex brings in a maple barrel aged treat from Ruse Brewing. Michael goes the European route. Stephen announces the next 420 episode cup theme. Thanks to Side Project Brewing for sponsoring this episode! Visit Side Project Brewing at SideProjectBrewing.com and follow them on Instagram @SideProjectBrew! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content

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01:46:47

Batch 190: Give Sofia Colucci A Raise

Malt Couture ·

2022/02/17

The Global Marking Vice President for Molsen Coors, Sofia Colucci, has done it again. This time hiring mathematician Ken Ono to dunk on Budweiser's 80 calorie beer reminding everyone that Miller64 has been around for over a decade. From gingerbread dive bars to New Balance collabs, Colucci is crushing the Beer News in a good way. Meanwhile, Campbell's Soup wants people to drink "brothtails." Alex revisits the days of the IBU wars with an old money IPA that clocks in at 100 IBUs, Michael can't tell

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01:50:49

Batch 189: Barleywine is Life: Stephen Edition II

Malt Couture ·

2022/02/10

It's another #BIL episode, this time Stephen brings in four barrel-aged barleywines including an old money classic from Flossmoor Station Restaurant & Brewery, a hidden gem from Benchtop Brewing, a stashed away barleybob from Hardywood, and a Barreled Souls collab with Horus. Which barleywine will reign supreme at the end of this episode? Will Michael enjoy any of them? Will Alex give his stamp of approval? May Lord Maris show mercy in the power rankings. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive

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02:08:19

Batch 188: Indiana: The Warm Beer State

Malt Couture ·

2022/02/03

Apparently, in Indiana there's an old dumb beer law that prohibits certain retailers from selling cold beer. Let's all hope they fix it with a slightly less stupid beer law. It's also a old dumb beer law triple header in the Beer News with New Jersey looking to designate open container areas and New York looking to allow alcohol sales in movie theaters. Alex shares a cripsy hometown hero from Iowa while Stephen presents a double feature. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content

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02:00:03

Batch 187: Monster Energy Smashes the CANarchy

Malt Couture ·

2022/01/27

Monster Energy buys CANarchy and the Malty Boyz™ hope this means Oskar Blues and Cigar City will get some choice sponsorship opportunities. In other Beer News, Russian River's Pliny the Younger gets a new release date and Marin Brewing Company closes it's doors. Alex brings in massive 21% barleywine that's bottled still, Michael brings is the best ham water to date, and Stephen catches both of them sleeping on some highly recommended rap music. Thanks to New Trail Brewing Co. for sponsoring this

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02:04:46

Batch 186: Bad Boiz Castle Incorporated LLC

Malt Couture ·

2022/01/20

Can you buy a hip, gently used brewery with just photos of apes? At Bad Boiz Castle Incorporated LLC we say, "Yeah, bruh. Yeah." Kings & Convicts is at it again purchasing yet another San Diego brewery, this time adding Saint Archer to their portfolio. In other Beer News, SweetWater's big weed overlords look to sell of what's left of Green Flash while Budweiser goes full Willy Wonka with their golden can contest. Alex brings in a saison from a brewery operating like it's 2005, Michael goes into

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01:49:15

Batch 185: Try Eating Ass!

Malt Couture ·

2022/01/13

Sometimes, a Tweet drops that shakes you to your core and makes you question the reality in which you live in. Pabst Blue Ribbon did just that and now the Malty Boyz™ will never be the same. Listen and find out which of the Boyz welcomes the new ass eating overlords and which one shuns ass eat and refuses to comply. Alex brings in what Evil Twin called their "best beer ever made" while Stephen continues his quest to make Malt Couture a pie podcast. Michael is let down by Drizly. Head to our Patreon

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01:40:37

Batch 184: Hometown Heroes Part II

Malt Couture ·

2022/01/06

Once again, Alex lights the Malt signal and asks for suggestions of hidden, local gems. The Malt Mavens have spoken and in this batch The Malty Boyz™ will try beers from Goldfinger Brewing Company, Jack's Abby, Godspeed Brewery, and Origin Beer Project before putting them through the Power Rankings. In the Beer News, a man brandishes a gun at Russian River Brewing, Green Flash and Alpine Beer Co. get gobbled up by Big Cannabis, and Sante Adairius keeps the spirit of a historic Oakland beer bar

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02:10:40

Batch 183: Make Out Counts and NFTs

Malt Couture ·

2021/12/30

Bro, get your peacock on with your steampunk goggles and big, loud hat because the Malty Boyz™ are exploring the game... the bourbon game. In Bourbon News, the Boyz™ discuss NFTs linked to rare bourbons stored in a "vault" to Buffalo Trace going high-tech to combat counterfeiting. Alex brings in a collab between The Bruery and Three Chiefs and gives an update about the status of Three Chiefs. Stephen ends 2021 with wine from Las Jaras Wines and interviews winemaker Joel Burt about the Dr. Steve

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01:58:33

Batch 182: A Beersmas Carol 2: The Scorpion King

Malt Couture ·

2021/12/23

It's another Beersmas here in the Maltyverse and once again old Ebenezer Kidd is visited by the ghosts of Beersmas Past, Super Past, Present, and Future. And all he got was a scorpion to eat and digest. That's right, Alex eats a scorpion carcass this episode! Serves him right working Stephen and Michael to the bone the way he does. Alex should have eaten at least two or three more scorpions tbh frfr. Guess that makes him the scorpion king or whatever. Anyway, in the Beer News, Barefoot Wines collabs

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01:42:34

Batch 181: Ur Bad

Malt Couture ·

2021/12/16

The Malty Boyz™ drop into the dive bars of South Dakota to the dive bars of Alabama and learn telling someone "Ur bad" is a flirtatious to tell someone they are good. In the Beer News, a stream in Hawaii registers a 1.2% ABV, Budweiser gets into the NFT game, and Miller High Life releases a gingerbread kit to build your own authentic dive bar. Miller High Life... ur bad. Michael gets put on a jury. Alex revisits an east coast remnant of The Great IBU Wars. Thanks to The Bruery for sponsoring this

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01:51:53

Batch 180: Just Drink Half

Malt Couture ·

2021/12/09

Alex's favorite magazine, Esquire, the official periodical of all lawyers, endorses the opinion that people should only drink half their beer then discard the rest. Does this endorsement hold any integrity? No. In other Beer News, aluminum tariffs threaten to destroy the Ball Corporation unless breweries start ordering no less than 1 million cans. In the Bottleshare, Alex brings in a hidden gem of a barleywine from Wax Wings Brewing Co. that caused a local scandal. Stephen is back on his shelf turd

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01:52:50

Batch 179: Michael’s Funniest Episode?

Malt Couture ·

2021/12/02

Alex speaks it into existence declaring this to be Michael’s funniest episode. Does Michael deliver or does he make Alex look like a fool? How many knee-slapping punchlines will Michael deliver while drinking barleywine from Kros Strain? Will Michael bust out his best roast jokes when talking about the return of the Festival of Wood and Barrel-Aged Beer? What zingers will Michael come up with when discussing Topo Chico releasing their hard seltzer in glass bottles? How hard will Michael burn Goose

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59:39

Black Friday Bonus: Maltterrogation with Averie...

Malt Couture ·

2021/11/26

In this Maltterrogation the Malty Boyz™ talk with founder of Keeping Together and Master Cicerone Averie Swanson! Hear about Averie's time as Brew Master for Jester King, moving to Chicago and consulting Half Acre before opening up Keeping Together. Then they dive into discussing her dream collaboration, favorite brewery facility, and the worst beer she's ever brewed. For more bonus content subscribe to our Patreon for weekly interviews, videos, and more! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer

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