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Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based parenting ideas to help kids thrive

Parenting is hard…but does it have to be this hard? Wouldn’t it be better if your kids would stop pressing your buttons quite as often, and if there was a little more of you to go around (with maybe even some left over for yourself)? On the Your Parenting Mojo podcast, Jen Lumanlan M.S., M.Ed explores academic research on parenting and child development. But she doesn’t just tell you the results of the latest study - she interviews researchers at the top of their fields, and puts current

kids & family parenting

All Episodes

01:19:43

206: How to find yourself as a parent

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2024/03/25

It can be really hard to see what's happening in our struggles with our children. They refuse to go to bed at bedtime; we're at home alone all day with a baby who doesn't like being put down, and our older child who is now being aggressive, and there's no time for us to even take a shower, and maybe it seems like everyone around us is judging our parenting choices.In this very different episode you're going to hear from parents who are in exactly these kinds of situations, and who

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58:51

205: How patriarchy hurts us…all of us

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2024/03/11

I have to admit, I’m a bit scared to say it…The P-word… “Patriarchy.”(Phew! I did it!)I know some listeners find it hard to hear. I’ve spoken with more than one woman who has told me: “I sent your podcast to my husband but then he heard the word “Patriarchy” and it was all over. There’s some sadness there for me, for sure. Every time I talk about patriarchy I talk about how much it hurts me and those of us who identify as women – but I also talk about how much it hurts men as well. And

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45:25

204: How to create more time by taking care of yourself

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2024/02/19

Sara has always tried really hard to not just be a good parent, but a really good parent. The best parent. (When I coached her and her partner recently to create some content for the Parenting Membership that you'll hear more about in a few weeks, her partner said to her: You hold everyone else to a high standard. You hold yourself to a higher standard.)Sara put a lot of pressure on herself, and this was even harder because she she didn't have the most amazing parental role models

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56:46

203: How to move toward anti-racism with Kerry Cavers

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2024/02/12

Last year I hosted a panel event in Vancouver where four people who have been active in helping us to navigate toward an anti-racist, post-patriarchal, post-capitalist future came together to share their ideas in front of a live audience. It was a beautiful event (eventually we'll process the video of it to share with you!), and I really hit it off with Moms Against Racism Canada founder Kerry Cavers so we got together afterward to chat. This is a much more personal

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51:11

Q&A#5: What really matters in parenting? Part 1

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2024/02/05

Listener Roberta submitted a question recently on YourParentingMojo.com/question: What does the research say are the decisions that really matter in parenting? That question immediately got my brain churning about what could be included, and how we would decide what to include, and how much of what's included could actually be research-based. The episode begins with a look at some of the major categories of factors that impact our children's development that

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53:59

202: How to Heal from Adverse Childhood Experiences...

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2024/01/29

My mom died when I was 10, and for a while people in our small village would look at my sister and me as if we were 'special' in some weird way. By the time I was a young adult that was just one of a stew of difficult experiences I'd had, and I also realized: my stuff is not special. By that age, most people are carrying around some kind of trauma. But so what? Does it matter? If our mental health is good enough, does it help to wallow around in all the stuff that's in the

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01:03:39

201: How to create a culture of consent in our families

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2024/01/15

When Carys was about three, I forced a dropper of antibiotics into her mouth to just get her to take it, so she would start to feel better. We were both tired and hangry and I didn't see another path forward, when she was refusing something that I knew would help her. What other choice did I have? My husband did see another path when he arrived home later that evening, and before she went to bed she willingly took a full dose of the medicine. These kinds of

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01:01:40

200: Ask Alvin Anything (Part 1!)

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2024/01/02

When I saw that our 200th episode was coming up, I knew I wanted to do something special to celebrate. Listeners called in with questions for me for our 100th episode, which was released in September 2019. The numbering is a bit fuzzy, I have to admit - we're actually well over 200 episodes because there have been an assortment of Sharing Your Parenting Mojo conversations with parents and other folks that use a different numbering system, but whatever. It's still a milestone😊 Back

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41:21

199: Digging Deeper into Parenting Beyond Power with...

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/12/11

Listener Rachel also reached out with some questions, and due to my book tour schedule it took us a little longer to get a call on the calendar, but eventually - on a day in Seattle when I also had a coaching call and two two-hour workshops based on the book - we made it happen. Rachel's questions go deeeep. She wanted to know: If there are ideas I logically know are the right ones to follow but I still have trouble doing it; How my parenting is evolving as Carys gets older (her own

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55:13

198: The connection between your ideas about...

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/11/27

A couple of years ago I was watching a session of the Alliance for Self-Directed Education's online conference by unschooling advocate Idzie Desmerais. At some point she dropped a quote into her presentation that I jotted down but didn't think much of at the time: What if your ideas about politics were just your ideas about childhood, extrapolated? I returned to my notes some months later, having spent much of that time immersed in writing the first draft of the book, the

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01:15:23

197: What to do about reward and punishment systems...

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/11/13

This is the first in a series of 'back to basics' episodes here on the show, where we'll look at the everyday challenges you're facing as a parent. (Have an idea for an episode? Share it on this thread in our free Facebook group [insert link], send us a max 2 minute video of you saying your question, or click here to record an audio message for me...) I'd wanted to do an episode on the use of reward & punishment systems in classrooms for a while, and when I mentioned this

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56:32

196: How to do right by your child – and everyone...

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/10/30

Do you worry about the state of the Earth? Climate change perhaps above all else, but also resource extraction, air pollution, and the injustice that goes along with the ways the impacts of these things are distributed? You're not the only one. I know not everyone goes this far, but one of the reasons I waited so long to have a baby, almost didn't have a baby, and will only have one child is to reduce my impact on climate change. We all know we're supposed to fly

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46:19

195: Raising Good Humans Every Day with Hunter...

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/10/16

Hunter Clarke-Fields is back with us again! She's the author of Raising Good Humans, and now the new book Raising Good Humans Every Day (affiliate links). Why does the world need two books with such similar titles? Are they even different?! Yes, they are! Raising Good Humans Every Day is small! And short! And the chapters are short! Each one contains just one practice, described in a few pages. If you've got five minutes you can read a chapter and then put the

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57:43

194: Regulating for the kids…and for your marriage

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/10/09

Do you ever feel triggered by your partner's behavior? (No? Just me? 😬) Many parents who join the Taming Your Triggers workshop sign up for help navigating their children's behavior...and then once they're inside they confess that their partner's behavior is even more triggering than their child's. As you might imagine, many of the participants in the Taming Your Triggers workshop are women. (Classic patriarchy at work: caregiving is women's work, and so is

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40:28

193: You don’t have to believe everything you think

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/10/02

In this short episode, I'm going to teach you a real, legit, bona fide magic trick.And unlike most magic tricks which rely on sleight of hand to convince you of something that has happened when it really hasn't, this one actually works. It helps you to see that things are not as bad as they seem, and that you can cope, even when things feel incredibly difficult and that you're failing as a parent.I asked four listeners to help me explain the concept to you, and how it has helped them, and one even

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01:19:35

192: What to do with the myth of Polyvagal Theory

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/09/18

Polyvagal Theory is everywhere these days. Psychologists talk about it; parenting coaches talk about it; if you’re in the mental health field you’re probably referring to polyvagal theory in some way. So one would assume that there’s lots of evidence for it, right? Well, maybe. Maybe not. In this episode I dig into the foundational principles of Polyvagal Theory and find that there's a lot less evidence supporting it than you might think, given how many places it's used. So

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53:57

191: Parenting Beyond Power launch celebration

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/09/05

Parenting Beyond Power is officially available today! Come join a mini-celebration with me in this podcast episode, and TODAY on Zoom at 11am Pacific/2pm Eastern/8pm Central Europe, and in-person this weekend if you're in the Bay Area! Do you celebrate your achievements? I don't know about you, but I find it pretty difficult. I didn't celebrate getting into Berkeley or Yale, or graduating from either of those places either (in fact, I think I was in the car driving away from each of

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55:52

190: How to use the tools in Parenting Beyond Power

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/08/28

One of the questions I'm asked most often about Parenting Beyond Power (preorder bonuses are available for just a few more days!) is: So when a group of listeners volunteered to get together to discuss what they got out of the book, that was the first thing I wanted to ask them. The core premise of the book is that the social forces of White supremacy, patriarchy, and capitalism have really hurt us - they're the biggest reason why we feel so much pain and shame. And we

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48:58

189: Childhood Unlimited with Virginia Mendez

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/08/14

Do you try to give your children messages about gender that are aligned with your values? Do you tell your daughter that she can do anything she wants to do, and look for shows that have equal representation of male- and female-presenting characters? If so, you're off to a good start. And...there's so much more to do. One of the core ideas in my book, Parenting Beyond Power, is that we parents pass cultural messages on to our children. We do that through the books we read, the

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25:58

Q&A 4: Is it safe to delay math learning?

Your Parenting Mojo - Respectful, research-based... ·

2023/07/31

In this episode we hear from listener Lindsay who wonders whether it's safe to delay math learning, since (they've heard) there's a 'critical window' for learning language. Would delaying math learning mean that our child can't catch up later? Will they develop a negative view of their own learning? What if they can't get into college? We address all of these questions and more. Parenting Beyond Power The wait is over! I'm thrilled to announce that Parenting Beyond Power

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