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PODCAST

Marriage Lab

Aaron & Jenna Zint

Aaron and Jenna have been married for over a decade and love talking to people about their relationships, the messiness, the struggle and the victories in all of it. If you"re married or planning on it, you can expect 1) Tools for the growth of your marriage and you personally 2) Hope for a healthy marriage no matter what you"ve experienced up to this point 3) Laughter and comfort when you say, "That"s totally us!" and "We"ve been there!" If you"ve enjoyed our podcasts,would you consider financially

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

39:08

But first...Curiosity

Marriage Lab ·

2025/10/23

Ever notice how easy it is to slip into a courtroom conversation? You start building a case in your head, stacking evidence, rehearsing your defense... all before you’ve actually asked a question. This week’s episode is about the habit that can stop that spiral before it starts: curiosity. When something feels off—at work, with your kids, or in your marriage—it’s tempting to assume motives or fill in missing details. But curiosity interrupts that pattern. It slows you down long enough to see...

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39:34

Can you put sex on the calendar?

Marriage Lab ·

2025/10/03

Please don't listen with your kids. Our case for scheduling sex. When life gets full—kids, work, ministry, and the endless to-do list—intimacy is often the first thing to slip through the cracks. We’re told sex should always be spontaneous, but in real marriages that can leave couples disconnected and frustrated. In this episode, we talk honestly about scheduling sex—why it isn’t cold or unromantic, but actually a powerful way to prioritize each other. We’ll unpack the myths around spon...

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29:04

When teasing turns toxic: scoffs & sarcasm- the slow...

Marriage Lab ·

2025/09/26

We all scoff. We all slip into sarcasm. But what if those “little” habits aren’t as harmless as they seem? Research from the Gottman Institute shows that contempt — often disguised as casual teasing — is the single strongest predictor of death to connection (aka: divorce) Scoffing, sarcasm, and eye-rolling may feel small in the moment, but they send powerful messages of superiority, dismissal, and disrespect. In this episode, we unpack how these micro-habits of contempt impact the brain...

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46:13

Steps to Move From Rumination > to > Processing

Marriage Lab ·

2025/09/19

Last time we talked about ruminating vs. processing. This week, I’m walking you through the how—practical steps to move through pain even if the other person doesn’t respond well. Here’s the framework: Notice your looping → instead, name the feelingUntangle your worth from their behaviorRemind yourself: I can be okay even if…Stay rooted in your power—choose your next stepLooping keeps you stuck, but processing sets you free. Podcasts Referenced in this episode: Quit Mind Readi...

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32:15

Ruminating vs Processing

Marriage Lab ·

2025/09/11

Can you tell the difference between when your emotions are hijacking you & when they're helping you? Noticing and expressing our emotions is a good thing. In fact, it’s vital for a healthy marriage. But there’s a thin line between naming our emotions and over-identifying with them. That’s where we slip into rumination—looping on the hurt, replaying the offense, and assigning meaning that keeps us stuck. In this episode, we explore the difference between processing your emotions and ...

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45:45

The Do's & Don'ts of Processing w/ Your Spouse

Marriage Lab ·

2025/08/29

In this episode of Marriage Lab, Erin and Jenna dive into the do’s and don’ts of processing with your spouse—how to share what’s on your heart in a way that invites care instead of conflict. From everyday recaps to high-stakes conversations, they unpack why intentionality matters, how to check for capacity, and why leading with emotions creates connection. Along the way, they share practical “dos” like focusing on feelings, clarifying expectations, and processing elsewhere first—and the “don’...

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45:09

Are you forgiving wrong?

Marriage Lab ·

2025/08/06

Think you’ve forgiven… but still feel stuck? You’re not alone. Most of us were never taught what real forgiveness looks like—just the performance of it. Say a prayer. Say the words. Move on. Except… we don’t. This episode will shift your view of forgiveness from a moment to a movement—one that actually sets you free. 👇 We’ll cover: • The sneaky ways we fake forgiveness (without knowing it) • 6 reflection questions to assess where you really are • Tiny habits that rewire your br...

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33:32

When Pain Feels Like an Identity Attack

Marriage Lab ·

2025/07/14

Some pain cuts deeper than others—not because it hurts more, but because it feels true. In this episode, we unpack the kind of pain that doesn’t just bruise your feelings, it hits your identity. We explore three subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways this happens: • When someone says it outright • When they imply it • When you infer it And then the spiral begins: – You feel like you have to prove your worth – You obsess over how they see you – You shut down, because it felt...

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42:13

When Pain spoils into offense

Marriage Lab ·

2025/07/07

Offense Isn’t Just Pain: It’s Pain + Pride We often think being offended is just another form of hurt—but it’s more than that. Offense is what happens when pain gets tangled with pride. It’s the moment pain hardens into judgment, and we start to feel powerful… while quietly becoming more closed off. In this episode, we unpack how offense feels like a defense mechanism—but actually keeps us stuck. You’ll learn how offense hijacks your brain’s ability to heal, why it loops like a highlight r...

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69:50

Special Episode: Moved by Love: the secret to sharing...

Marriage Lab ·

2025/06/30

What if evangelism wasn’t about striving—but about overflow? In this special episode, I sit down with a few of my friends fresh off a missions trip to unpack what actually cracked the code for us when it came to sharing Jesus. Spoiler: it wasn’t a strategy—it was being so connected to the Father’s heart that love naturally led the way. We talk about what surprised us, what challenged us, and how everyday evangelism becomes possible when we’re moved—not pressured—by love. Our Pre-Mar...

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36:29

Passivity isn't a fruit of the spirit

Marriage Lab ·

2025/06/23

What if the “peace” you’re protecting in your marriage… is actually costing you real connection? In this episode, we’re unpacking how passivity can disguise itself as love—especially in Christian marriages. We’ve seen it in our own relationship: moments when silence looked like patience, but it was actually fear. Times when we avoided conflict, convinced we were being kind or godly, but bitterness was the fruit. We explore: Why passivity is not the same as peacekeepingHow we can accidentall...

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33:20

Date Fail Debrief: Control Freak & Shut Down

Marriage Lab ·

2025/06/17

What do you get when you mix a paddleboard, high expectations, and two humans with emotions? Definitely not the relaxing date we envisioned. But maybe... a deeper kind of win? This was not our best date… but maybe it was one of our best recoveries. We went on a paddleboard date thinking it’d be relaxing and fun—but being stuck on the same board triggered us both in different ways. Instead of letting the day spiral, we each practiced managing our own emotions without blaming the other.&n...

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29:50

You, Me &… Nobody Else?- isolation in marriage

Marriage Lab ·

2025/05/30

In this episode, we’re tackling a subtle but serious issue in marriage: isolation. What happens when your spouse becomes your only source of connection? Spoiler: it doesn’t lead to thriving. We talk about: Why consistent, same-gender friendships are crucial—especially for accountability, encouragement, and emotional healthHow couples slowly drift into “island mode” without realizing itThe specific ways isolation often impacts men vs. womenWhy expecting your spouse to meet all your relational...

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35:06

16 Questions for your next date night

Marriage Lab ·

2025/05/22

🎉 It’s our 16th anniversary, and apparently our marriage is now old enough to get its driver’s license. 😅 But let’s be real— Even after 16 years, date night convo doesn’t always flow naturally (especially when we’re tired or parenting has fried our brains). So we decided to change that. 💬 In this episode, we: Answer 16 intentional + fun questions—one for each year we’ve been marriedShare laughs, real talk, and a few surprise answersInvite you to ask the same questions on your next date ...

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30:12

Slow Miracles

Marriage Lab ·

2025/05/13

Not all breakthroughs come in a flash. In this episode, we talk about the kind of transformation that happens slowly—over months or even years. The kind you don’t always see until you look back and realize, we’re not where we used to be. We fully believe in sudden miracles. We’ve seen God move in dramatic ways. But in our own marriage, most of the lasting change has come through showing up when things felt stuck… choosing connection in the face of apathy… and staying present when it wou...

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34:22

Welcome back, now what?

Marriage Lab ·

2025/04/24

In this episode, we talk about the often-overlooked rhythm of re-entry—what it looks like when one spouse returns from a trip and the home dynamic shifts again. We share how we’ve learned to treat that adjustment period with extra care, tweak our habits, and give each other grace instead of expecting a seamless snap-back to normal. If you’ve ever had a rocky re-entry, this one’s for you. You just might walk away with a few new habits to try next time one of you heads out on...

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37:37

Avoiding Birthday Blues & Blowouts

Marriage Lab ·

2025/03/16

Birthdays—love them or dread them, they can be a surprisingly tense topic in marriage. 🎂 From unspoken expectations to last-minute letdowns, these special days often carry more emotional weight than we realize. In this episode, we’re diving into the highs and lows of celebrating birthdays with your spouse, sharing our own birthday wins and major misses over the years. You’ll hear about: ✅ The silent pressure & expectations that often ruin birthdays ✅ Why no one should be the d...

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29:16

You're Blocking Your Own Connection (Without Even...

Marriage Lab ·

2025/03/09

In this episode, we’re tackling the hidden ways we sabotage our own connection in marriage—especially when we expect our spouse to read our minds. No matter what it is, waiting for them to magically meet our unspoken needs is a passive approach that creates distance instead of intimacy. We’ll explore why taking the risk to express what we truly need leads to deeper belonging, even when it feels vulnerable. Join us as we break down how to move past the fear of rejection and start building the ...

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37:51

Internal vs External Processing Styles

Marriage Lab ·

2025/02/16

In this episode, we talk about our respective styles of processing how we are feeling. Aaron is an external processor, needing to externalize what's he's feeling in order to understand it. Jenna is an internal processor, needing time to internally mull over what she's feeling in order to understand it. These two different styles can make conflict unnecessarily difficult unless you know how to work with them. We'll share the growth paths for each to avoid the common pitfalls in relationship. ...

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31:02

The Compassion Cup vs. The Identity Cup: A Marriage...

Marriage Lab ·

2025/02/07

In this episode, we continue our conversation about changing how we show up in conflict by focusing on the choice we have in how we respond to our spouse’s pain. When your spouse shares hurt, are you holding out your compassion cup, or are you holding out your identity cup? We explore how defensiveness often signals that we’re interpreting their pain through the lens of our own identity and fears, rather than listening with genuine compassion. The truth is, we can only find our identity in Go...

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128 results

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