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Marriage Lab

Aaron & Jenna Zint

Aaron and Jenna have been married for over a decade and love talking to people about their relationships, the messiness, the struggle and the victories in all of it. If you"re married or planning on it, you can expect 1) Tools for the growth of your marriage and you personally 2) Hope for a healthy marriage no matter what you"ve experienced up to this point 3) Laughter and comfort when you say, "That"s totally us!" and "We"ve been there!" If you"ve enjoyed our podcasts,would you consider financially

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

21:27

Don't ask triggered people BIG questions

Marriage Lab ·

2026/04/03

Ever ask gradually big relationship question in the middle of an argument… and then regretted the answer? In this episode, we break down a common (but damaging) pattern: asking life-defining questions when someone is emotionally triggered. What it often looks like 👇 • “Why didn’t you invite me?” → “Do you have more fun with them?” → “So you don’t have fun with me?” → “Do you even enjoy being around me?” →“Do you even like me?” → “Are you happier without me?” → “Is something wrong with us?” →

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35:40

How calls with your spouse go sideways (& how to fix it)

Marriage Lab ·

2026/03/17

Phone calls with your spouse should be simple… so why do they so often go sideways? In this episode, we unpack the subtle dynamics that quietly derail connection: • unspoken expectations • not checking if the other person even has capacity • unclear intentions (are we connecting or handling logistics?) • hoping for something deeper… without saying it ...and the hurt that builds when your spouse can’t show up the way you needed—especially in the middle of a workday What starts as a quick cal...

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36:02

Stop Calling Strategies “Needs”

Marriage Lab ·

2026/02/26

In this episode, we unpack one of the most practical distinctions we teach: the difference between a need and a strategy. A need is a relational longing: connection, safety, being seen, being prioritized. A strategy is your idea of how that need should get met: date night, quicker texts, no phones at night, doing the dishes before sitting down. The problem is, most of us accidentally disguise strategies as needs… and that’s where control sneaks in. We talk about why that feels so painful (for...

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28:15

Understanding Yourself Without Staying Stuck

Marriage Lab ·

2026/02/18

Sometimes self-awareness helps us grow… and sometimes it quietly gives us permission to stay exactly where we are. In this episode, we talk about the subtle ways insight can turn into self-justification—whether it’s personality types, triggers, habits, or even love languages—and how awareness is meant to become a starting point for transformation, not a comfortable resting place. We share stories from our own marriage about conflict avoidance, travel differences, stress habits, and learning h...

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76:28

Divine Intervention: Amy's story- Divorced & Remarried

Marriage Lab ·

2026/02/11

A story only God could write. 💔➡️❤️ Divorce, divine encounters, heart-level repentance, and a miraculous reconciliation. Listen to hear Amy's testimony of when God interrupts a story that felt finished. It will remind you all things are possible with Him. Support the show ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- >>> Become a sponor of our shows <<< This helps Jenna & Aaron to continue to b...

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34:49

Different Flavors of Comfort in Families ( feat:...

Marriage Lab ·

2026/02/03

In this episode, Jenna is joined by her nine-year-old daughter, Rosie, for a sweet and surprisingly insightful conversation about what comfort looks like in their family. Together, they talk about the different “flavors of comfort” each family member needs when big emotions show up—whether that’s physical touch, someone staying close, space to process alone, or quiet presence. Rosie shares how she prefers space before reconnecting, while Jenna reflects on how having someone in the...

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39:41

The Dopamine Hunt behind 6,7 : how to harness joy...

Marriage Lab ·

2026/01/28

Dopamine isn’t just about pleasure. It’s about seeking. Your brain lights up most when the reward isn’t guaranteed— when you’re searching, anticipating, scanning. This is why elementary kids around the country are stoked out of their minds when they encounter or hear 6,7. What can we learn here that could help us adults harness & grow our joy as we train our attention intentionally?? Optimism isn’t just a personality trait. It’s a trained habit of attention. In this epis...

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32:56

Stuck in the Same Fight: how naming patterns can...

Marriage Lab ·

2026/01/12

Why do the same conflicts keep showing up in marriage—even when the topic keeps changing? In this episode, we talk about the power of naming your patterns: the emotional and relational loops that quietly drive conflict, disconnection, and reactivity. We share real examples from our marriage, parenting, and coaching work to show how awareness creates space between a trigger and your response. When you can name what’s happening inside you—passivity, shutdown, avoidance, mind-reading, or self-re...

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33:55

Rethinking Relative Visits

Marriage Lab ·

2025/11/11

Family visits are supposed to bring connection… but sometimes they bring exhaustion, awkward expectations, and a drained bank account. In this episode, we’re talking about what to do when the way you’re visiting family isn’t working anymore — and how to get creative about connection without spending a fortune. We’ll share our own story (including a few hard lessons from our in-laws 😅) and offer practical alternatives for families who live far apart: meeting in the middle, combining tr...

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39:08

But first...Curiosity

Marriage Lab ·

2025/10/23

Ever notice how easy it is to slip into a courtroom conversation? You start building a case in your head, stacking evidence, rehearsing your defense... all before you’ve actually asked a question. This week’s episode is about the habit that can stop that spiral before it starts: curiosity. When something feels off—at work, with your kids, or in your marriage—it’s tempting to assume motives or fill in missing details. But curiosity interrupts that pattern. It slows you down long enough to see...

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39:34

Can you put sex on the calendar?

Marriage Lab ·

2025/10/03

Please don't listen with your kids. Our case for scheduling sex. When life gets full—kids, work, ministry, and the endless to-do list—intimacy is often the first thing to slip through the cracks. We’re told sex should always be spontaneous, but in real marriages that can leave couples disconnected and frustrated. In this episode, we talk honestly about scheduling sex—why it isn’t cold or unromantic, but actually a powerful way to prioritize each other. We’ll unpack the myths around spon...

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29:04

When teasing turns toxic: scoffs & sarcasm- the slow...

Marriage Lab ·

2025/09/26

We all scoff. We all slip into sarcasm. But what if those “little” habits aren’t as harmless as they seem? Research from the Gottman Institute shows that contempt — often disguised as casual teasing — is the single strongest predictor of death to connection (aka: divorce) Scoffing, sarcasm, and eye-rolling may feel small in the moment, but they send powerful messages of superiority, dismissal, and disrespect. In this episode, we unpack how these micro-habits of contempt impact the brain...

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46:13

Steps to Move From Rumination > to > Processing

Marriage Lab ·

2025/09/19

Last time we talked about ruminating vs. processing. This week, I’m walking you through the how—practical steps to move through pain even if the other person doesn’t respond well. Here’s the framework: Notice your looping → instead, name the feelingUntangle your worth from their behaviorRemind yourself: I can be okay even if…Stay rooted in your power—choose your next stepLooping keeps you stuck, but processing sets you free. Podcasts Referenced in this episode: Quit Mind Readi...

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32:15

Ruminating vs Processing

Marriage Lab ·

2025/09/11

Can you tell the difference between when your emotions are hijacking you & when they're helping you? Noticing and expressing our emotions is a good thing. In fact, it’s vital for a healthy marriage. But there’s a thin line between naming our emotions and over-identifying with them. That’s where we slip into rumination—looping on the hurt, replaying the offense, and assigning meaning that keeps us stuck. In this episode, we explore the difference between processing your emotions and ...

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45:45

The Do's & Don'ts of Processing w/ Your Spouse

Marriage Lab ·

2025/08/29

In this episode of Marriage Lab, Erin and Jenna dive into the do’s and don’ts of processing with your spouse—how to share what’s on your heart in a way that invites care instead of conflict. From everyday recaps to high-stakes conversations, they unpack why intentionality matters, how to check for capacity, and why leading with emotions creates connection. Along the way, they share practical “dos” like focusing on feelings, clarifying expectations, and processing elsewhere first—and the “don’...

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45:09

Are you forgiving wrong?

Marriage Lab ·

2025/08/06

Think you’ve forgiven… but still feel stuck? You’re not alone. Most of us were never taught what real forgiveness looks like—just the performance of it. Say a prayer. Say the words. Move on. Except… we don’t. This episode will shift your view of forgiveness from a moment to a movement—one that actually sets you free. 👇 We’ll cover: • The sneaky ways we fake forgiveness (without knowing it) • 6 reflection questions to assess where you really are • Tiny habits that rewire your br...

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33:32

When Pain Feels Like an Identity Attack

Marriage Lab ·

2025/07/14

Some pain cuts deeper than others—not because it hurts more, but because it feels true. In this episode, we unpack the kind of pain that doesn’t just bruise your feelings, it hits your identity. We explore three subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways this happens: • When someone says it outright • When they imply it • When you infer it And then the spiral begins: – You feel like you have to prove your worth – You obsess over how they see you – You shut down, because it felt...

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42:13

When Pain spoils into offense

Marriage Lab ·

2025/07/07

Offense Isn’t Just Pain: It’s Pain + Pride We often think being offended is just another form of hurt—but it’s more than that. Offense is what happens when pain gets tangled with pride. It’s the moment pain hardens into judgment, and we start to feel powerful… while quietly becoming more closed off. In this episode, we unpack how offense feels like a defense mechanism—but actually keeps us stuck. You’ll learn how offense hijacks your brain’s ability to heal, why it loops like a highlight r...

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69:50

Special Episode: Moved by Love: the secret to sharing...

Marriage Lab ·

2025/06/30

What if evangelism wasn’t about striving—but about overflow? In this special episode, I sit down with a few of my friends fresh off a missions trip to unpack what actually cracked the code for us when it came to sharing Jesus. Spoiler: it wasn’t a strategy—it was being so connected to the Father’s heart that love naturally led the way. We talk about what surprised us, what challenged us, and how everyday evangelism becomes possible when we’re moved—not pressured—by love. Our Pre-Mar...

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36:29

Passivity isn't a fruit of the spirit

Marriage Lab ·

2025/06/23

What if the “peace” you’re protecting in your marriage… is actually costing you real connection? In this episode, we’re unpacking how passivity can disguise itself as love—especially in Christian marriages. We’ve seen it in our own relationship: moments when silence looked like patience, but it was actually fear. Times when we avoided conflict, convinced we were being kind or godly, but bitterness was the fruit. We explore: Why passivity is not the same as peacekeepingHow we can accidentall...

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137 results

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