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PODCAST

Oz 9

It"s Spring 2142 (a Tuesday), and Gated Galaxies has launched its 400 Oz-8000 ships, each carrying 50,000 "resting guests" to, hopefully, a new home on a shiny, brand-new planet. Except this whole "terraform and take over" idea isn"t actually the plan; the real plan is far more nefarious and involves a great deal of cackling. But those aboard the ships don"t know that, so off they toodle (those that make it out of Earth"s atmosphere, at least), all shiny and optimistic. This is the story of one of

fiction comedy fiction

All Episodes

30:28

episode forty-five: Who doesn't love a decorative...

Oz 9 ·

2020/09/13

It's really late. The kind of late that keeps on getting later until it circles back round to early. When I'm this blurry and tired, I'm likely to say anything. Like how much more bearable life became on this ship with we busted Dr. Theo out of his pod. Geeky never looked so good.... See, now what did I say? Stop with the questions and the "oooo tell me everything" eyes. Dr. Theo is extremely fond of his personal space, and that's all there is to it. So shut up. I'm going to bed. You're listening

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31:28

episode forty-four: It's very hard to do science in...

Oz 9 ·

2020/08/30

If you've been keeping up with the antics of that zany crew aboard the Oz 9- Have you ever considered taking up a REAL hobby? Like stamps or shuffleboard or knitting quilts or something? Or listening to Top of the Round, which is a much more sensible pastime? It's episode 44, and no one is any smarter than they were 43 episodes ago, and that includes you, since your brain is no doubt deteriorating at a much faster clip than it would have if you'd done Sudoku or whatever it is instead. Fine, go ahead

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28:32

episode forty-three: Found their fillings in a...

Oz 9 ·

2020/08/16

Perhaps you've heard about the mold that's eating radioactive materials around Chernobyl? And that scientists are considering insulating spacecraft and astronauts suits with the stuff to protect them from solar radiation? We're not imagining things up here. We're just ahead of our time. You've been listening to: Shannon Perry as Madeline and Olivia David S. Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae Tim Sherburn as Colin Eric Perry as Joe, Mr. Southers, and Dr. von Haber Zetzer Richard Cowen as Leet and

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28:37

episode forty-two: Escaping at a brisk walk

Oz 9 ·

2020/08/09

Something nefarious is happening on a golf course in French Lick, Indiana. Actually, several nefarious things. Well, OK, like, three... maybe four nefarious things, and then a whole bunch of naughty things. Look, we're losing the point here. Look, just listen to the episode. It'll be easier than me trying to explain it to you. You've been listening to: Aaron Clark as Ben and le Bichon Frise Sarah Golding as Mrs Sheffield Iri Alexander as Julie Richard Cowen as Tiberius and Leet Kevin Hall as

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27:43

episode forty-one: My kidneys go straight to voice mail

Oz 9 ·

2020/07/19

Welcome back, space monkeys! We hope you enjoyed your six-week excursion ashore. Watch your step, the gangplank is slippery and also there's no oxygen out here, so look lively. Take your seats, please; we'll be setting adrift...sorry, a-sail again soon. No eating, please; we just got the toilets clean. And listen up for the security announcement. JK, there's no security to be had here, but do listen to the trailer for the awesome Relativity Podcast that happens at the end of the episode. Now. Where

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19:06

Bonus: Oz 9 hiatus episode: We'll always have ...

Oz 9 ·

2020/07/12

If you've ever wondered about our crew's lives before they got wrapped up in the drama of the Oz 9, well, keep wondering, because you're not going to learn a damn thing from this disaster of an episode. You're listening to: Eric Perry as Dr. von Haber Zetzer and Sarah Golding as pretty much everybody else. Except Richard Nadolny as the Narrator. Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley; additional music in this episode comes from several artists on Storyblocks (mostly

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105:29

Bonus Oz 9: The Season Two Crew

Oz 9 ·

2020/07/05

If you think Oz 9 looks like chaos from the front, well, it's just as raggedy and unkempt 'round the back (if slightly less dangerous). In this bonus episode for our hiatus, our 4 newest cast members gathered to talk about life as a voice actor and the swirling tornado of imminent doom that is existence aboard the Oz 9. You're listening to: David S. Dear (Dr Theo Bromae) Sarah Golding (Mrs Sheffield) Kevin Hall (Cal/Greg) and Iri Alexander (Julie) We'll be back with our first episode of

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24:47

Bonus: The Oz 8000 Biosphere: Portrait of a Refuge

Oz 9 ·

2020/06/09

The Oz ships failed under mysterious circumstances entirely caused by their on-board crews or natural disaster wholly unrelated to Gated Galaxies or its subsidiaries, officers, or agents. G2 accepts no responsibility or liability for loss of liberty, limb, or life due to incorrect use of machinery, gross negligence, intentional or reckless misconduct. By simply existing, you acknowledge that life is inherently dangerous and often fatal and absolve Gated Galaxies of any and all injury you may incur

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30:07

episode forty: Be prepared to lose body hair

Oz 9 ·

2020/05/24

It's the end of Season 2, and our crew are still dumb, still in space, and still hovering at the edge of death. Thanks to all the zig zagging around the galaxy, they're nearly back where they started, and the forniculator still hasn't been fixed. So, if you've been with us for the past 39 episodes, well, you probably could have skipped this bit. Let's hope Season 3 is better. In Season 2, you heard from: Iri Alexander as Julie Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise and

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27:40

episode thirty-nine: From last cluck to a bucket of...

Oz 9 ·

2020/05/10

Episode 39 means one more until the end of Season 2, and where we're going is no clearer than the muck at the bottom of the bioswamp. But hey, you've gotten this far, you might as well stick with us a little longer. Eventually, it'll all make sense. Or not. Probably not. You've been listening to: Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Kevin Hall as Greg and Felonius Eric Perry as Joe, Dr. von Haber-Zetzer, Mr. Southers, and Howard Iri Alexander as Julie David S. Dear as Dr. Theo Bromae Aaron Clark as le

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32:19

episode thirty-eight: I forgot to untie the technician

Oz 9 ·

2020/04/26

Look, I've been up all night, and seriously the first person to speak to me may find themselves trying to pour coffee into a stump. Like, where their head used to be, not a tree, that was supposed to be sort of threatening and scary. Never mind. Make sure you listen right to the end as there's treats and stuff you won't want to miss. Oh, and Head 1 finally gets a name. It's ... epic. Really. You’re listening to: Iri Alexander as Julie Tim Sherburn as Colin, Emily, and Buck Kevin Hall as

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27:18

episode thirty-seven: Hung up like a deli chicken

Oz 9 ·

2020/04/12

Despite Joe's best attempts to keep the Oz 9 free of ... icky things, a very large, armed, and presumably hostile icky thing has taken over the bridge. This has just been one of those space voyages, hasn't it? You're listening to: Iri Alexander as Julie Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise Eric Perry as Joe, Head 1, and Dr. von Haber Zetzer Richard Cowen as Leet and Tiberius June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline Kevin Hall as Greg and

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29:58

episode thirty-six: There once was a garçon from...

Oz 9 ·

2020/03/30

Pod poetry is generally considered to be the 3rd worst in the universe. If you have a weak liver or any sort of cheese allergy, you might want to check with a doctor before listening to this episode. You're listening to: Bonnie Brantley as Jessie and Donna Richard Cowen as Leet and Tyberius Iri Alexander as Julie Sarah Golding as Mrs. Sheffield June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros Tim Sherburn as Colin and Buck Kevin Hall as Greg Eric Perry as Joe and Mr. Southers Aaron Clark as le Bichon

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26:29

episode thirty-five: Rabid egret eggs and something...

Oz 9 ·

2020/03/15

Beans — BIG beans — are about to be spilled aboard the Oz 9, and that could spell trouble for the crew. Especially if the beans land in a very particular way that happens to spell "trouble." And someone aboard the Oz 9 is not doing their job. I realize I should probably narrow that down for you, as it's a hefty list, but just listen up and you'll figure it out. You’ve been listening to: Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise Eric Perry as Dr von Haber-Zetzer, Joe, and Head

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27:36

episode thirty-four: Fly, you beautiful bastard, fly

Oz 9 ·

2020/03/01

What do you do when your Otologostealth X13 runs out of charge? That wasn't actually a rhetorical question — the manual is in Ancient Mesopotamian (we think) and none of the charging cables we have fits. Anyone? Anyway, we say goodbye to a crewmate this episode, so get your hanky ready or use your sleeve or whatever, just prepare to have your innards stepped on in the name of emotional manipulation. You're listening to: June Clark Eubanks as Glenda and the Albatros Kevin Hall as Greg Eric Perry

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25:42

episode thirty-three: If you say so, Frog Butt

Oz 9 ·

2020/02/16

No one said life in space would be easy. Though if they'd listened closely, the people buying seats on the Oz ships might have heard G2 officials mutter under their breath about how easy death in space was going to be ... Anyway, it's a Thursday aboard the Oz 9, which means Leet is optimistic about their chances of survival. He's alone in that, but hey, he's a rebel. You're listening to: Richard Cowen as Leet Tim Sherburn as Colin Bonnie Brantley as Jessie June Clark Eubanks as the

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26:27

episode thirty-two: It's stuck in my cravat

Oz 9 ·

2020/02/02

I've pretty much decided that some weeks ago, I ate the fugu, and everything since has been some sort of weird fever dream. I mean, that's the only thing that makes sense, right? RIGHT? You’ve been listening to: Kevin Hall as Cal and Greg the Zebra Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Eric Perry as Joe, Dr. von Haber Zetzer, and Head One Tim Sherburn as Colin and Emily Richard Cowen as Leet Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline

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18:08

Bonus episode thirty-one and a half: Scrummy nuns and...

Oz 9 ·

2020/01/19

Otherwise known as "The Origin of Colin Smith," this mini ep gives some background into- Ah ah — you almost got me there. Nope. I'm not telling. I'm afraid you'll have to listen like it's 2020 or something. You're listening to: Eric Perry as Mr. Southers Kevin Hall as Spotty Bosh and Richard Nadolny as your Narrator This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Theme and incidental music composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and

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29:47

episode thirty-one: Daydreams and teddy bear hugs

Oz 9 ·

2020/01/12

I... we... they... Seriously? This is... It just... SERIOUSLY? You've been listening to: June Clark Eubanks as Glenda and the Albatros Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie Tim Sherburn as Colin, Buck, and Emily Eric Perry as Mr. Southers, Head 1, and Dr. von Haber Zetzer Richard Cowen as Leet Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise and Ben Shannon Perry as Olivia and Madeline Special thanks to guest star Sarah Golding as Mrs. Clara Sheffield Richard Nadolny as your Narrator This episode is

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20:41

episode thirty: There's an armpit method?

Oz 9 ·

2019/12/29

It's the holiday season aboard the Oz 9, though how that happened when they launched in spring, like, a month ago, is anyone's guess. But whatever the case, there's a mysterious box in Cargo Bay 7, and whether it was delivered by Santa or Satan... well, I guess you'll have to listen to find out, now won't you? You're listening to: Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Eric Perry as Head 1, Joe, and Dr. von Haber Zetzer Richard Cowen as Leet Tim Sherburn as Colin and Emily Aaron Clark as le Bichon

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