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PODCAST

The UnMothered Podcast

Phylis Mantelli

When life gives you a toxic mother, what do you do? You listen, learn, and change your direction! I’m Phylis Mantelli, author of the book “UnMothered: Life With A Mom Who Couldn’t Love Me.” This podcast is a place for mentoring and encouragement as we navigate the complexities of toxic parent relationships. Join me as I share my journey and invite God-filled guests to discuss emotional healing, overcoming childhood trauma, and personal growth. Together, we"ll explore new thoughts and patterns to

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

23:22

What Does It Look Like To Be The Best Partner In A...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/05/22

Ariel joined us on the podcast again this week to talk more about being a working mom and how she picked her partner for the support he provides for her emotionally. She has learned that for her, working fulfills her, and gives her purpose, she likes contributing outside of the home and her husband supports her on that 100%. They can communicate with one another the feeling of having a long day at work vs a long day with the kids.They have found a sense of balance that compliments each other within

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25:16

Can You Embrace It All Being A Working Mom? | Episode 27

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/05/15

We are talking with my oldest daughter Ariel who is a wife, mom of 2 (almost three), and a working mom.We chat about the balance and the imbalance of being a working mom.With her current season, she is learning to surrender her own expectations with the constant changes that come with day-to-day life. Plans change, especially with younger children. The biggest lesson she has learned through her pregnancies is to be vocal about her body and mind.Some of the main questions that we covered are:Is there

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20:28

What Do You Do When It’s Time To Take Care Of Your...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/05/08

When I got the phone call that my mom had broken her hip, believe me, I wanted to hang up and pretend I never heard it.My relationship with my mom was not the typical kind and taking care of her (again) was the last thing I wanted to do. When your toxic parent ages and you have to care for them what are you going to do?When is it a good time to mend the relationship with your mom? When she is ill?I made a decision that I was going to take care of her, but this time with boundaries. Let’s explore how

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26:03

What Does Preventative Mental Health For Our Children...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/05/01

How do we teach our children how to handle their feelings?In this episode, I want to chat about our children and how to hone their own feelings when stress or anxiety sets in for them.The questions I want you to walk away with today are:When is a good time to discuss feelings with your kids? What is age appropriate in talking about hard things?What kind of things can we do to help them through these things?I recently came across the documentary “American Tragedy” which was about the Columbine High

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24:48

How Do You Tell Your Story To Your Significant...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/04/24

When you first get introduced to your boyfriend or girlfriend’s family, when is it a good time to talk about your hard past? If you have experienced a different upbringing than the family of your significant other, it can be hard to explain your past. The biggest question is can they embrace you into the family when you have come from a completely different background?There are some questions to think about after listening to this episode:When is it a good time to bring up specifics about your

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13:59

Family Secrets And Why They Are Bad For Everyone |...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/04/17

When a family keeps secrets thinking the truth will never come out, they are sadly mistaken. Secrets can create collateral damage by not only ruining relationships but causing shame in your generations.Are you willing to learn how to have truthful but sometimes tough conversations that will always lead to beautiful relationships? I recently had breakfast with a friend where we were sharing some tough things and we got on the subject of how our family’s generation always kept secrets. Things looked

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33:25

The Secret To A Happy Marriage And How To Create A...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/04/10

How do you create the marriage you have always dreamed of? What is the secret to a happy marriage? In my opinion, it is staying the course! We will dive into the good, bad, and ugly of what marriage really is and why it’s not for the faint of heart.There is an innocence of what we think marriage is when we are young and as you get older, life can take over. When we say those vows, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, you have to understand that those scenarios

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18:31

How I Hold Pride In Being A Highly Sensitive Person |...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/04/03

Do not let anyone undermine what makes you feel safe and comfortable. You have “bucked up” long enough. Making time for friends that understand and energize you instead of connections that deplete us is fine.Want to stop apologizing for feeling different from your friends or most of the world?Do you get anxious and excited to be invited to social events?Is your comfort zone your home? Do you prefer to be alone rather than with a bunch of friends?Do loud noisy restaurants, or outside noises make you

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18:09

Accept & Heal There’s No Need To Be Ashamed Of Where...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/03/27

When you have grown up with a different childhood, you might have a hard time accepting the past. In this episode, we are going to talk about the shame that comes from having that hard story. Do you often have a hard time speaking about your childhood because it doesn’t sound like everyone else? Are you afraid you will scare people away with your “movie of the week” life? I hear ya, and let's break this down so it doesn’t become a hindrance for you.So I guess the question becomes also; are you

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18:35

When Is Going No Contact With Your Mom A Good Idea? |...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/03/20

When you feel like being around your mom is no longer an option. What do you do? There is no need for guilt if there is danger around you concerning your mother. You can still love your mother if she is not in your life.I had a member in my Facebook group ask this question a while back, and it bears talking about it. For as much as we would love to wrap a nice little bow around healing and forgiveness when it comes to our mothers, I don't believe it is healthy or possible sometimes. I have heard

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20:59

Don’t Hold Shame When Your Siblings Question Why You...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/03/13

Have you ever had a sibling or close relative get jealous because you suddenly have a life change for the better? It’s almost inevitable that when you finally break free from your past “scarcity” mindset, you will get pushback from those who have remained the same.Remember who you are and where God has placed you. You are not tied to every person in your family forever and ever. Amen. You are meant for more. So are they. If they are willing to step out of the comfortable/everyday things they have

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21:54

How Do You Know If Your Mother/Daughter Relationship...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/03/06

Today we are chatting with Tina Yeager. She is an award-winning author, speaker, and life coach, Tina Yeager hosts the Flourish-Meant podcast and Flourish Today on Christian Mix 106 and publishes Inkspirations Online, a weekly writers’ devotional. She has been licensed as a counselor since 2005, which came in handy when we started talking about the healthy boundaries between mothers and daughters. Yeager serves as director of traditional groups with Word Weavers International and as an active member

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18:48

Should You Heal The Toxic Relationship With Your Mom...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/02/27

How do we find the heart to heal those who have hurt us? We will explore what it means to forgive people who hurt you deeply. Do you need to forgive them? Should you? What does that look like? Let’s talk about this.I was asked in my private Facebook group of my Unmothered women, what to do when they are having a hard time wanting to heal a relationship with their mom and sometimes with their siblings. This can be a tricky, touchy subject. I want to be sure we are always doing something that will

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24:43

When Is It A Good Time To Share Your Broken Mother...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/02/20

Is there ever a good time to share your mommy issues story? In this episode, we are going to go over eliminating the shame of growing up in a toxic relationship with your mother and sharing it with others.When do you tell someone new about your past? Should you?When is it time to just not say anything?Can you feel safe and protected when sharing about your messed up mom?For so many years I would rather chew on wood (not really) than explain my childhood with my mom TO ANYONE! Now that I have written

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38:46

The Fearless Mujer Podcast: Growing up "Unmothered"...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/02/13

Listen in on this amazing podcast episode I recorded with The Fearless Mujer Podcast. We chatted about generational dysfunction that I've grown up in and more about my story that share in my book Unmothered: Life With A Mom Who Couldn't Love Me. If you enjoy this episode share it with friends and don't forget to leave a review to help spread this message with other women who may need to hear it. Also checkout the Fearless Mujer over on Instagram:

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19:59

What It Feels Like Sharing Your Hard Story | Episode 13

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/02/06

I just came back from a trauma class in Chicago. There we had to start digging into parts of our story that have been buried to survive. We spend half our lives just surviving the trauma that has been done to us. This class left me stunned with the realization that I had never dug into my story of being taken from the only home I had known in my eight years of life. What do we do to keep going through the traumas of our life? Today we will find out why it is important to hold those stories well and

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29:49

“Unmothered: Overcoming the Wound of Abandonment”: A...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/01/30

I was honored to be a guest on the Arise Esther Podcast by Dawn Scott Damon. We had such a great conversation! Here is a little bit about Dawn: Dawn Scott Damon is known as the BraveHearted Mentor; Coaching for women over 40. She is a speaker, podcast host, mentor, and award-winning author.Dawn is a favorite keynote conference speaker and an engaging communicator who inspires her audience to maximize their God-given purpose and potential in Christ. Dreams are ignited as Dawn uses sound biblical

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21:51

How To Know If You Need A Mama Mentor | Episode 11

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/01/23

How do we know if we need a mentor and how we can find one that we trust? This is a tricky proposition and one you can’t take lightly. It must be thought out and seek someone you can trust with your heart. Let’s walk through the ways you can find the right woman to help you with issues we should be able to go to our moms with, but someone that can step in and fill those shoes for a bit. How many times have you wished you could pick up the phone and call your mom? Or drive over and have coffee or

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27:41

Are You Afraid Of Success? How To Start Living The...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/01/16

With the New Year before us and everyone talking about goals, intentions, and dreams, do you wonder if there is anything good this year for you? Are you allowed to dream big? Is it wrong to think about being better than where you have come from? In this episode let me break it down for you to realize why we(as UnMothereds) are afraid of success, why we sabotage ourselves out of it, and what we can do to start living the life we dream and desire! Because after all, life can be good.I have three ways

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22:55

Where Are My Baby Boomers At? | Episode 9

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2023/01/09

Yes, I am a baby boomer. I’m a 65-year-old woman and proud of it! My question for all the women out there today is why do we stop dreaming of things we really want to accomplish and how we can get back on track?Today I want to dive into the false narrative that once we reach a certain age, we are not relevant anymore. No one ever shares with us that our second chapter is just beginning! Our freedom from children and housework and the mundane is over. We are coming out of our cocoons today! What are

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