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PODCAST

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle

I’m Anna Runkle, also known as the Crappy Childhood Fairy, and I teach people to recognize and heal the symptoms of Childhood PTSD. Welcome to my podcast!I’m not a doctor or therapist; I know about childhood trauma because I lived it, and I discovered a radical approach to healing that focuses first on calming neurological dysregulation, which is common in people who grew up with abuse and neglect. In my podcasts, I teach about dysregulation – how to know if you have it, what it can do to

education self-improvement

All Episodes

71:09

Recognizing and Escaping Toxic Friendships (4-Video...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/02/16

Most people won't tolerate mistreatment from friends. But if you grew up with abusive or neglectful parents, you may have been conditioned to hang on for life to toxic friends, no matter what. In this four-video compilation of some of my most popular videos, I respond to letters from people whose connection wounds are keeping them trapped in toxic friendships. Instead of leaving, they are giving in to the trauma-driven tendency to blame themselves for their friend's bad behavior. Hear my

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36:40

Why You Second-Guess Yourself in When Their Bad...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/02/14

If you were betrayed in childhood by the adults you trusted, your self-esteem and boundaries can be so wounded, that you become “betrayal blind.” You can SEE you’re getting SO much LESS than you need and deserve in a relationship, but because you can’t face ending things, you UNSEE it. This is self-deception, and we are motivated to disbelieve what we see because the need for love is SO strong, and facing the truth, means the crumbs of love you’re getting will be lost – and that feels

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23:35

How Dismissive Parenting Creates Lifelong Problems in...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/02/12

When you were a child you needed the attention of parents – not just for food and shelter, but for your emotions. You need them to recognize and see when you were struggling, and help you navigate relationships, stand up for yourself, and set boundaries. That's what parenting IS. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who was raised by dismissive parents, who invalidated her needs and prioritized their own activities and preferences. Now she is with a dismissive partner, and

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35:53

Why You’re Hiding Your True Self (and 40 Ways to...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/02/10

Being around people, especially if you grew up with trauma, can feel stressful, trigger-y, and dysregulating. People can be mean, they judge you and they make you feel left out, like you don’t belong. For many of us, this started when we were in our own families when we were small. Did this happen to you? The coping mechanism you might have used was Self-Suppression -- playing small and trying to protect yourself by not being really YOU. Learn 40 ways YOU might be doing this. These

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68:34

What to Do When Social Interactions Overwhelm You...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/02/09

There’s an almost universal symptom that people who grew up with trauma will tend to exhibit - and it’s a sense of disconnection. And even though you crave social connection, trauma often comes with "people triggers" that make interactions stressful and dysregulating for you. When you're feeling triggered by people, shutting them out feels like it's the right, best, most self-caring thing you can do. But when you do it long term it can bring unhappiness to every area of your life. In this

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19:27

Why You Can’t Stop Craving Love From People You Can’t...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/02/07

There is a huge connection between abuse and neglect – especially emotional neglect in childhood – and a painful pattern in adulthood of pouring all the love in your heart into the IDEA of someone you can’t have. The word for this is limerence. And as much as this is a painful and lonely maladaptation of our very human need for love – there’s something tender and beautiful about this too. I used to think limerence was something shameful and crazy, until I received this extraordinary letter

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41:58

How to Detach When Your Feelings Go TOO FAR

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/02/05

Not every obsessive relationship is a romance. Sometimes it’s a friendship that gets through the cracks of the neglect you grew up with in childhood, and it becomes HUGE In your mind. You think about them, you want them to approve of you, you want them to unconditionally love and support you in all circumstances, all the time – (which is a clue, by the way, this is an unmet need from your childhood that’s leaked out onto an unsuspecting friend. Things come to a head when reality hits, and

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25:19

10 Emotional Regulation Strategies for Everyday Life

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/02/03

For those of us with childhood trauma, this is what can hurt relationships the most: We get overwhelmed and emotionally dysregulated, and with anger growing more and more intense, we explode. That’s lashing out. There’s another way to release the intensity, without abandoning your true feelings. In this video, I teach you what's going on when that happens, along with strategies you can use *in the moment* to maintain your calm and express yourself in a better way.Try the FREE Daily

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87:30

These Red Flags Mean Walk Away! (4-Video Compilation)

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/02/02

One way you can get deeply hurt in a relationship is when you SEE the red flags in your partner's behavior, but instead of confronting them, you gaslight yourself: This means going into denial, justifying your partner's mistreatment of you, or distorting the truth of the situation. Why do we do this In this 4-video compilation I share four of my most popular videos from people I've called-out for the red flags in their relationships, and their self-gaslighting. Is Past Trauma Affecting Your

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31:38

What to Do When You Think Your Partner is Lying

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/31

There are SOME people, some situations, that shut down your common sense. You can be going along doing pretty well, you’re seeing life clearly, you’re moving forward, your judgment is good. And then that ONE person comes along and it’s like they cast a spell on you. They make you crazy with weird signs that something’s not right. And instead of thinking clearly, your mind stops working, and you go into denial. Now I’m not a therapist, but I’m someone who’s recovered from getting into

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27:15

Childhood Neglect & The Urge to Abandon Yourself...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/29

When you grew up neglected, abandoned, and with none of your needs met – you may be likely to fall in love with people who are unable to provide the solid, caring love that you need and crave. And at the same time, the wounds of neglect drive you to cling to them, even after it's clear they're unstable, emotionally unavailable, or not safe to be near you. This is the critical juncture where trauma in one generation, can HOP over into the next – when your own trauma BINDS you to people who

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12:48

Pretending to Be "Nice" is Manipulation (And It Won't...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/27

A “People Pleaser” is someone who abandons their authentic response to other people during their interactions – who abandons their own choices of what to do, what to say, and what to BE, opting instead to try to guess what other people want. It's a leftover symptom of early trauma, but can block your healing. Do you know someone like this, or do you find yourself people-pleasing others? In this video, I unpack why people-pleasers end up broke, alone and resentful, and what you can do to

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75:09

Healing From The Scapegoat Experience (4-Video...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/26

To avoid responsibility for their own actions, abusive parents sometimes make one child into a scapegoat, and siblings follow suit. The person scapegoated suffers horribly, but getting pushed out of the family sometimes means they demonstrate more strength and success in life than those who we kept in the family fold. In this 4-video compilation, I respond to letters from people working to heal the wounds of this terrible form of emotional abuse.Do you have CPTSD? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF

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18:12

What To Do When Someone Makes You Feel Creeped Out

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/24

Participating in a recovery program is a powerful way to get support and change your life. In any group -- in person or online -- there's always some risk that someone will be inappropriate or cross boundaries, especially when everyone in the group is there *because* they struggle. It's not uncommon in meetings that one person takes a romantic interest in someone they meet there, and sometimes the feelings are not mutual. In this video, I respond to a letter who feels stalked by a fellow

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20:36

How To Heal Hypervigilance From Parents’ Creepy S*x...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/22

Some people are deeply confused about what’s appropriate to say and do around their kids. When parents are unboundaried like that, walking around undressed, raging, getting emotional, talking about exploits, it makes kids feel scared again and again, putting them at risk to develop Complex PTSD, and robbing them of a sense of safety in the world. In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman whose "ick" triggers from her parents' behaviors are blocking her ability to love.Try the FREE

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30:27

20 Signs You’re In a Codependent Relationship

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/20

If your life energy is strongly concentrated on another person and their dysfunctional behavior... and you believe you'd be happy if you could just make them change...and they haven't changed... and you fight about it -- *you* have a problem. Maybe they have a problem too, but *your* problem is that you’ve surrendered all your power to a person who is actually not acceptable to you. That is what codependency is. And If you don’t know the signs, I’ve got 20 of them to teach in this

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110:17

Break Free from Childhood Trauma Faster (4-Video...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/19

Many people affected by early trauma work HARD to heal, but don't get results. If you're ready to move forward and you're prepared to make changes that make healing easier, you'll want to hear this 4-video compilation where I share my best trauma healing tips.Heal Trauma in Just One Year?: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3JrPdvx 🟢 Order My New Book, RE-REGULATED: https://bit.ly/4dtGVze Take my FREE Course or Quizzes: https://bit.ly/40M2YeW Enroll in my Courses or Membership:

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10:38

Get Out of Romantic Obsession And Open Your Life to...

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/17

Limerence is an addiction-level romantic obsession with someone you can’t have. It can get so bad that you're checking out of reality, isolating and fantasizing that the person you love loves you back. It’s common in people who were emotionally neglected as kids, and it can rob you of any chance of truly loving someone and being loved in your life, because limerence takes up that space where anyone real, could really be with you. In this video, I respond to a follow-up letter from a man who

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14:35

What to Do When You Feel Like Running Away

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/15

Hardly anyone understands this, but when you spend your life pursuing people who aren’t into you and won’t commit to you – guess who’s the avoidant? You are. Even though you’re devastated when they reject you and you pine away for them after it’s over, there’s something about the way you *know* it can never work out that sets you free to love without reservation. You can love deeply, but keep your options open, and never feel trapped. But you'll always feel grief, which may be wearing like

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25:15

How to Spot and Heal Covert Avoidance

The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle ·

2025/01/13

So many people are walking through life WANTING to solve problems of connection, and purpose and productivity and TRYING to do it. And they don’t even realize they’re doing this! But they’re holding their lives – and especially the PEOPLE in their lives – at arm's length. This is what I call “covert avoidance.” You LOOK like you’re engaged deeply with your life, but really? You’re distracted, you’re making plans and then canceling them, you’re setting goals and then wiping them from your

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