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PODCAST

The UnMothered Podcast

Phylis Mantelli

When life gives you a toxic mother, what do you do? You listen, learn, and change your direction! I’m Phylis Mantelli, author of the book “UnMothered: Life With A Mom Who Couldn’t Love Me.” This podcast is a place for mentoring and encouragement as we navigate the complexities of toxic parent relationships. Join me as I share my journey and invite God-filled guests to discuss emotional healing, overcoming childhood trauma, and personal growth. Together, we"ll explore new thoughts and patterns to

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

26:02

What Describes The Ultimate Toxic Mom | Episode 116

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/09/29

What do you do when the mother you trusted with your life, who was so supportive and loving towards you, becomes the monster in your life?I recently watched the Netflix documentary called “Unknown Caller,” and this is a tough one. In the episode, I am giving the ending away, so if you haven’t seen it yet, go watch it and then come back to listen to this episode!Let’s talk about how this documentary showed me what real emotional abuse from a mom looks like, and how we can sit, listen, and show

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20:20

Do You Know How To Trust Your Own Instincts? |...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/09/22

Do you trust your instincts?Has your mother or someone else made you feel like your opinions don’t matter? It happens when the enemy sees your beauty and passion and wonderful calling and is trying to kill it.Don’t let him. You have to trust that God has given you the Holy Spirit that you can trust. Listen in to hear what I have to say about this.Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/Phylis Mantelli’s IG:

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16:57

What Would You Tell Your 20-Year-Old Self? | Episode 114

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/09/08

What would you tell your younger self?Have you ever looked back at your life and said, “Well, that didn’t happen the way I planned it?”I think it’s great to have a plan of what you picture your life to be, but I would recommend learning to pivot a lot. I often tell young women and my own girls that their twenties are their crying years.Let me take you through the reality of what can happen when you take a detour down the road a bit. Don’t fret, dear one; the best is yet to come!Let’s Connect!Follow

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17:40

The Mother I Truly Needed vs. The One I Got | Episode...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/09/01

Where did we go when we needed a mom who was caring, attentive, and present, but what we got was completely different. Our mothers were absent, ignored us, and on some occasions, abandoned us altogether.In today’s episode, we are going to explore a real and honest question: “What did I actually need from my mother that I never received?”We get to the heart of the matter and get honest with ourselves about what we need and what we need to do now.You may have never received those things from your mom,

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18:29

It's Time to Let the Kiddos Leave For College…Now...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/08/25

The kids are leaving. What happens now? Where do you go now if your whole personality has been that of a mommy to these young children?You have to let your children fly. Don’t clip their wings, or they will never know how to survive in the world without you. Make them successful for the world, not just for that momentJust remember that you've done a really good job, and they can be independent, it’s a good thing for them!Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast

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22:16

Have You Made Silent Agreements or Vows From Your...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/08/18

How many times have you allowed someone else’s words, comments, or declarations of who you are to stick on you like absolute truth?Is it time to peel back the layers and see if this is something the enemy likes to use as a weapon and keep you from being the wonderful woman God wants you to be?He made you to shine!Let’s dig into this together and help you discover your authentic self.Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/Phylis Mantelli’s

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25:10

Do You Have “Spidey Sense” Because of Your Broken...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/08/11

Do you have “Spidey Sense” when it comes to emotions?Were you the one who always made sure everyone, but especially your mom, was okay? Could you feel the tone of the room as soon as you walked through it?You might be doing this now in your own family.Maybe it’s time to take care of you and stop worrying about everyone else to the point of your own decline in health, mentally and physically. Let’s talk about using this skill to your advantage, not your detriment. Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The

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22:44

What Happens When Your Toxic Mom Gets Sick | Episode 109

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/08/04

What do you do when your mother wants you to take care of her during an illness or while recovering from surgery?Do you go?Do you walk away from her demand to help?The answer is so layered, but one thing is sure: don’t do it out of guilt! Let’s figure out a plan so you don’t regret your choice, no matter what that choice is.Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/Join the

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19:05

Most Downloaded Episodes | Are You The ‘Black Sheep’...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/07/28

We are taking July off to enjoy a much-needed summer vacation! We hope you take some time to relax this summer as well, and we will chat with you back in August. In the meantime, enjoy some of the most downloaded episodes! How do you define the black sheep in the family? Has this label been placed on you because you don’t abide by the dysfunction in your family? There is a difference between being the troublemaker or the truth-teller. If you are just trying to survive in a highly abusive family

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18:58

Most Downloaded Episodes | The Truth About Growing Up...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/07/21

We are taking July off to enjoy a much-needed summer vacation! We hope you take some time to relax this summer as well, and we will chat with you back in August. In the meantime, enjoy some of the most downloaded episodes! What was it like growing up in your home?In my home, I felt like I was constantly dealing with a teenager or even a child. While at the time I just thought this was ‘normal’ I later understood that it wasn’t. When you grow up with a parent who is emotionally immature and can’t be

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31:24

Most Downloaded Episodes | How To Handle Your Toxic...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/07/14

We are taking July off to enjoy a much-needed summer vacation! We hope you take some time to relax this summer as well, and we will chat with you back in August. In the meantime, enjoy some of the most downloaded episodes! This week's episode came as an anonymous request through my weekly newsletter, Tuesday Talks With Phylis (link in bio to sign up or head to my website!).Let’s talk about the do’s and don’ts of letting our children be a part of our mothers’ lives and what do you do when your toxic

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29:02

Most Downloaded Episodes | An Emotionally Immature...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/07/07

We are taking July off to enjoy a much-needed summer vacation! We hope you take some time to relax this summer as well, and we will chat with you back in August. In the meantime, enjoy some of the most downloaded episodes! Over the past few years, I’ve been studying the different types of toxic moms. Imagine my surprise when I started studying about toxic parenting and realized my mom was emotionally immature AND narcissistic!I never knew what to expect from my mom from one day to the next. It was

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21:02

Has Your Past Caused You To Grow Up Being Afraid? |...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/05/26

Do you get scared or anxious from ordinary things in your life?Can it be tied to past traumatic events? Sometimes the things we react to now are a direct result of the trauma we have gone through as children.We tend to fall into patterns to keep ourselves safe, or so we think. It can keep us prisoners in our own bodies.Learn how to recognize some reactions and start the process of digging through to get to a healthier place.Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast

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25:38

The Qualities Of A Healthy Mom vs. A Toxic Mom |...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/05/19

What are the qualities or differences in a healthy Mom versus a toxic Mom?Big differences in my opinion. Is there such a thing as a perfect mom? I haven’t met one yet, but I know we can always do better than what we have grown up in if we have, in fact, grown up in toxicity.Let’s talk about what each of these kinds of moms looks like, and see if there is any improvement that needs to be made on our part to be the kind of mother we dream of.Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast

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34:00

Happy Mother’s Day: A Daughters Perspective To An...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/05/12

Let’s bring on my daughter on today’s episode and talk about the good, bad and better of moms!Bringing on my daughter can help us understand as moms how we can learn from daughters and the next generation.Listening to them helps us be the best moms we can be.Let us know how you like this episode! Please leave a review or send us a message over on Instagram. We would love to connect with you. Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/Phylis

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21:09

UnMothered Sons: The Hidden Wound Men Carry | Episode...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/05/05

In this powerful and emotional episode, we explore a topic that's often overlooked in conversations around childhood trauma — what happens when men are the ones who were never mothered? What does it look like when a boy grows into a man still carrying the ache of a mother’s absence, and how does that wound ripple through his career, his relationships, and his future family?Inspired by the shocking real-life story told in the documentary Con Mom, host Phylis dives into the haunting truth about what

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23:10

Can You Save The Relationship With Your Mom? |...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/04/28

Can you have a relationship with your toxic mother?The answer is easier than you think, and it’s totally up to you and no one else. Let’s explore different ways you could possibly have a relationship with your mother if you think it could work.Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/Join the conversation in my private community:

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21:31

Life After You Break The Habits & Patterns of Old...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/04/21

It’s time for you to create some healthy inner talk and stop believing the lies your moms have told you!In my past episodes, we talked about the different ‘types’ of mothers. Today, we are going to touch upon what we need to do to break away from these narcissistic, controlling, overly enmeshed moms.Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/Join the conversation in my private

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33:31

Do You Have a Calling To Write Your Story? | Episode 102

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/04/14

Have you ever thought of writing a book? Is a memoir something that God is calling you to? He did for me, and it wasn’t something I ever thought I would do, but has become one of the best things I have ever done. If you are curious, listen to this episode and see if this will confirm what you have been thinking. If you need help getting started, contact me…I’m here to help!Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/Phylis Mantelli’s IG:

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31:36

Perfection & Control: Breaking Free To Find Peace...

The UnMothered Podcast ·

2025/04/07

I had such a great conversation with our guest today! Christine Hoy speaks to women who feel overwhelmed by life's demands and the relentless pursuit of perfection. She had no idea that the emotional and physical burnout she experienced caring for her terminally ill mother would lead to a spiritual transformation in her own life. Answering God’s invitation to a year-long season of rest, Christine learned how to surrender control of her life and move from self-reliance to an ever-deepening trust in

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