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PODCAST

Relationships Made Easy

Dr. Abby Medcalf

The research says the key to a happy life is happy relationships. But how exactly do you make your relationships better? That’s what this show is all about.I’m Dr. Abby Medcalf, psychologist, best-selling author, TEDx speaker, and (according to my kids) the bossy Jewish mom you didn’t know you needed. With decades of experience and millions of listeners in over 180 countries, I give you the no-fluff, research-backed strategies to make all your relationships better: with your partner, your family,

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

39:08

344. Why Is Dating So Damn Hard Right Now? (And How...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/07/21

If you’ve been wondering whether dating is harder than it used to be, I’m here to tell you: yes. You’re not imagining things. It’s not just that you’re older, pickier, or doomed to attract commitment-phobes. The truth is, dating today has a unique set of challenges, most of which are designed to keep you swiping, second-guessing, and emotionally confused. But don’t panic. Today we’re going to break down why dating feels so hard right now (it’s not just you), what emotional availability really means,

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32:10

343. Micro-Gaslighting: The Tiny Cuts That Undermine You

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/07/14

You know those moments that make you pause and think, “Wait, am I being ridiculous right now?” You feel off, but you can’t quite explain why. The conversation wasn’t overtly mean. You weren’t screamed at. But still… something felt wrong. Well, you might be experiencing micro-gaslighting. We already know that gaslighting is a form of emotional manipulation meant to distort your sense of reality. But micro-gaslighting is sneakier. It hides behind sarcasm, “jokes,” and well-meaning comments that, over

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39:50

342. You Don’t Have to Earn It: Breaking Free from...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/07/07

If you’ve ever wondered, “Am I doing enough?” at work, in your relationships, as a parent, or just as a person, you’re not alone. So many of my clients feel like they have to prove their value through performance, productivity, or being “good enough” for someone to love or respect them. Today we’ll explore the difference between self-worth and self-esteem, the signs that your sense of worth has become transactional, and five practical ways to break this pattern and start living from a place of

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49:49

341. When Your Partner Is Being Evasive, Withholding...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/06/30

Nothing makes your stomach drop quite like that moment when you realize your partner isn’t telling you the truth. Whether it's an outright lie, a carefully omitted detail, or that uneasy feeling that they're sidestepping around something important, suspecting deception in your relationship is gut-wrenching. And when gaslighting enters the picture? That's when you start questioning not just them, but your own reality. But here's the good news: you're not powerless, you're not crazy, and there are

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53:47

340. Judgment Detox: 8 Steps to Be Less Critical and...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/06/23

While judgment can be a natural human response, being judgmental can erode your relationships and seriously hinder your personal growth. Yes, judgment feels good at first. It gives you a hit of certainty, a sense of superiority, and the illusion of control. But over time, it poisons your perspective and isolates you from the very connection you crave. Today we’ll talk about why you judge, the problems it causes, and my 8 steps to help you become less judgmental.____________________________Full blog

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46:40

339. Why You Keep Proving Yourself Right (Even When...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/06/16

You break up with someone and suddenly, every memory is framed as proof that they never really cared. You get into an argument with your mom, and you leave convinced, once again, that she just doesn’t get you. You walk into a work meeting with the story that your boss doesn’t respect you, and now every glance or tone of voice becomes more “evidence.” Sound familiar? That’s confirmation bias, and it’s working hand-in-hand with a set of mental strategies called defense mechanisms. Together, they keep

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44:58

338. How to Stop Taking It Personally: 5 Steps to...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/06/09

It’s not hard to stay calm and open when someone is complimenting your outfit or thanking you for dinner. But when they’re disappointed in you? Hurt by something you said? Frustrated by a mistake you made? That’s when your brain shifts into protect mode. And suddenly, instead of listening, you’re defending, explaining, or withdrawing. Defensiveness is one of the biggest barriers to connection, whether it’s with your partner, your boss, your best friend, or your teenager. But if you can learn to

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59:56

337. Why We’re So Afraid to Be Alone (and the Five...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/06/02

We talk a lot about loneliness these days, but we don’t talk enough about why being alone triggers such deep fear for so many of us. Is it just about relationships? Or is there something deeper, hard-wired into our biology and psychology? Spoiler: it's both. And understanding the roots of this fear is the first step to changing it. If you’ve ever felt that pit in your stomach at the thought of an empty weekend, or stayed in a relationship far too long just to avoid solitude, you know exactly what I

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44:06

336. Is Food Addiction Real? Here’s the Truth (and 5...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/05/26

Let’s start with a hard truth wrapped in a soft blanket: Yes, food addiction is real, and if you’re struggling with it, you’re not broken, lazy, or weak. You’re human. You’re living in a world where the food industry spends billions engineering snacks to hijack your brain, and your biology is just doing its thing, trying to survive. Today we’ll cover all the research and the “why” of food addiction, and then I’ll give you my five actionable steps to start healing your food

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38:07

335. Are You a Narcissist and Don’t Know It? The...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/05/19

“I’m just putting myself first, is that narcissistic?” “Am I being selfish or setting a boundary?” “I think I might be a narcissist.” Sound familiar? If you’ve asked yourself any of these questions, take a deep breath. You’re probably not a narcissist. But the fact that you're even wondering is worth unpacking, because somewhere between healthy self-love and full-blown Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), things get murky. So let’s clear it up. Today we’re digging into the difference between

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1:04:47

334. Dopamine Detoxing is a Scam (But You Should...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/05/12

In today's fast-paced digital world, the concept of "dopamine detoxing" has gained traction as a method to reset our brains from constant stimulation. But what exactly is dopamine detoxing, and does it hold any scientific merit? Today, we'll delve into the science behind dopamine, debunk the myths surrounding dopamine detoxing, explore how modern motivations hijack your brain's reward system, and then I’ll give you actionable strategies to recalibrate your relationship with dopamine and your world

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50:33

333. Why You (or Your Partner) Struggle to Talk About...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/05/05

If you’ve ever felt like your partner shuts down when you ask, “How are you feeling?” or you find yourself saying, “I don’t know what I’m feeling; I just feel off,” you might be dealing with something deeper than emotional avoidance. You might be dealing with alexithymia. No, it’s not a disease. Nobody’s broken. But it’s real, and it affects your relationships, your mental health, and your ability to connect with yourself. Because if you don’t know how to identify or express your emotions, it’s

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53:46

332. Why We Eat Our Feelings: Understanding and...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/04/28

Ever found yourself knee-deep in a pint of ice cream after a stressful day, convincing yourself that this is "self-care"? (Or is that just me?). Emotional eating is a common (yet sneaky) coping mechanism that many people struggle with. Why do we turn to food when we’re stressed, sad, or even bored? More importantly, how can we break free from the cycle? Today we’re diving into the psychology behind emotional eating, why it’s so hard to stop, and my top six research-backed ways to regain control over

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37:35

331. A New Mindset for Navigating Neurodiverse...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/04/21

If you’re in a relationship where one or both partners are on the autism spectrum, you’ve probably noticed that the usual relationship advice doesn’t quite work for you. You might have read articles, watched videos, or even talked to a therapist, but instead of feeling helpful, that advice often leaves you feeling more frustrated, disconnected, or misunderstood. Here’s why: you’re not just speaking different love languages; you’re coming from different neurological cultures. This isn’t about broken

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56:47

330. Codependency and Boundary Red Flags When Dating

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/04/14

Dating should be exciting, filled with curiosity, fun, and a growing sense of connection. But if you’ve struggled with boundaries in the past or found yourself repeatedly in relationships that drain you, you might unknowingly be attracting (or being attracted to) codependent dynamics. Today we’ll break down what codependency looks like in dating, how to spot red flags early (before you’re in too deep), and the subtle ways someone might be trampling your boundaries that you shouldn't ignore. You’re

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53:46

329. The Science of Friendship: How to Build, Keep,...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/04/07

Friendship is one of the most essential yet often overlooked aspects of our well-being. Not only does the research show that friendships keep us mentally healthy, but studies also show they keep us physically healthy. As adults, making and maintaining friendships can feel more complicated than it once did, leaving you feeling disconnected or unsure of how to build meaningful connections. Today, we’ll explore what it truly means to be a good friend, how to create new friendships as an adult, and what

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56:12

328. Stop Feeling Overwhelmed: The Four Steps to Set...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/03/31

Families can be wonderful and supportive, but they can also be experts at overstepping, guilt-tripping, and ignoring personal space, like a TSA agent who really loves their job. If you've ever struggled to say "no" to a family request (that felt more like a demand), you're not alone. The good news? You can establish limits and boundaries without turning into a villain or cutting ties completely. Today you’ll learn actionable strategies and my four steps to set healthy, effective boundaries with the

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51:00

327. Fear of Rejection vs. Fear of Abandonment: How...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/03/24

Fear of rejection and fear of abandonment are certainly similar, but they hold some important differences. In fact, what you do to heal your fear of rejection, is not necessarily what you do to heal your fear of abandonment. Although they’re closely related, they’re still distinct emotional experiences and they show up differently in your relationships, your self-perception, and in your coping mechanisms. Today you’ll learn all about the differences and how to apply specific tools for each so you

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51:00

327. Fear of Rejection vs. Fear of Abandonment: How...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/03/21

Fear of rejection and fear of abandonment are certainly similar, but they hold some important differences. In fact, what you do to heal your fear of rejection, is not necessarily what you do to heal your fear of abandonment. Although they’re closely related, they’re still distinct emotional experiences and they show up differently in your relationships, your self-perception, and in your coping mechanisms. Today you’ll learn all about the differences and how to apply specific tools for each so you

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36:33

326. What Narcissists Do When Backed into a Corner:...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/03/17

When narcissistic, controlling people feel backed into a corner, meaning they’re exposed, challenged, or losing control, they tend to react with a range of defensive, aggressive, or manipulative behaviors. Their reactions stem from a fragile ego, a deep-seated fear of losing power, and an inability to process shame or vulnerability in a healthy way. Some of the most high-profile examples of this play out with celebrities who have controlling or narcissistic tendencies and can’t handle being held

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377 results

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