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PODCAST

Relationships Made Easy

Dr. Abby Medcalf

The research says the key to a happy life is happy relationships. But how exactly do you make your relationships better? That’s what this show is all about.I’m Dr. Abby Medcalf, psychologist, best-selling author, TEDx speaker, and (according to my kids) the bossy Jewish mom you didn’t know you needed. With decades of experience and millions of listeners in over 180 countries, I give you the no-fluff, research-backed strategies to make all your relationships better: with your partner, your family,

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

33:08

367. Why Anxious and Avoidant Partners Keep Getting...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2026/01/27

If you’ve ever been in a romantic relationship where one of you keeps reaching for closeness while the other pulls away just when things feel important, this episode is for you. If part of you feels like you’re always chasing connection, or part of you feels like too much closeness makes you want to escape, you’re not broken. You’re likely in an anxious-avoidant dynamic. Anxious and avoidant partners don’t randomly fall in love. This pairing is common for very specific psychological and nervous

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1:11:51

366. Divorcing a Narcissistic Ex: Why It Escalates...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2026/01/20

Most people expect a divorce or breakup to be painful. What they don’t expect is for it to feel strategic, relentless, and never-ending. If you’re separating from someone with narcissistic traits, you’re likely treating it as a transition, but they’re treating it like a war. Today you’ll learn why divorcing or breaking up with a narcissistic partner follows a completely different set of psychological rules, the mindset shifts that help you stop taking the bait, and what you need to do differently,

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56:10

365. Should You Stay or Leave Your Relationship?

Relationships Made Easy ·

2026/01/13

How do you know when it’s time to stop trying in a relationship? I get asked this question a lot. How do you know if you’re giving up too soon? How do you know if a relationship still deserves more effort? How do you know if you’ll regret leaving?These questions show up after you’ve already tried. After the conversations, the compromises, the therapy, the books, and the waiting. What makes this decision especially hard is that, by the time you’re asking it, you’re often not just confused. You’re

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29:16

364. You Think Everyone Is Judging You, But They Aren’t

Relationships Made Easy ·

2026/01/06

You think everyone is watching you. You think they noticed the weird thing you said. You think they’re analyzing your silence or your laugh or that moment you stumbled over your words. Then you replay it like it’s your job. Why can’t you stop?! You’re overthinking because your brain is running an old program from a time when belonging was survival. You’re not the problem. The wiring is the problem. So today you’re going to learn why your brain assumes people are thinking about you when they aren’t,

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40:41

363. What to Do When Your Partner Shuts Down in Conflict

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/12/16

Your partner is not trying to ignore you during conflict. Their brain is overwhelmed. In this episode I explain emotional flooding, why it happens, and what actually helps in the moment. You will walk away with clear steps you can use today.____________________________Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/emotional-flooding-in-relationshipsIf you want exact language for these moments, download my one-page script pack:https://abbymedcalf.com/emotional-flooding-scriptsJoin my online

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49:11

362. They Were There But Not Really: Healing From...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/12/09

Ever feel like your parents were there but somehow you still grew up feeling unseen, unheard, or like you had to handle everything alone? In this week’s episode, we’re unpacking emotional neglect: what it really is, how it shapes your adult relationships, and five steps to finally heal and reparent yourself. If you’ve ever wondered why it’s so hard to ask for help, open up emotionally, or stop being the strong one, this episode is for you.____________________________Full blog and show notes:

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28:36

361. How to Stop Freaking Out When Life Feels Uncertain

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/12/02

Your brain treats “not knowing” as danger, which is why uncertainty feels so awful. But you can train yourself to handle it. In this video, Dr. Abby Medcalf breaks down the neuroscience of uncertainty and teaches how to calm your nervous system, shift your mindset, and live beautifully even when life feels unpredictable. Includes research-backed tools and a free Uncertainty Tolerance Toolkit.____________________________Full blog and show notes:

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37:51

360. Why You Keep Getting Triggered and How to...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/11/25

You swear it’ll be different this time. You’ll stay calm when your mom criticizes you, when your partner walks away mid-argument, or when your friend ghosts you for the third time. And yet…there you are again: defending, withdrawing, or apologizing just to make the tension stop. You’re not weak. You’re wired. Your brain learned long ago what to do when it sensed danger, and it still thinks those same moves are saving your life. Today we’re going to talk about what’s really driving your emotional

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52:06

359. Soothing Yourself First: Why Relying on Others...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/11/18

You always wait. You wait for the phone call from your partner, the text from a friend, the counselor’s time, maybe even your parent’s voice to calm you. But what if I told you that waiting is costing you your power? That you are the single most reliable person you’ll ever have to calm you down, and until you claim that, you’ll keep showing up in your relationships needy, reactive, or out of sorts.Today we’re going to uncover why you habitually reach for someone else first, how that pattern affects

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29:18

358. Holiday Peace On Demand: What to Do When Family...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/11/11

The holidays can bring out the best in us and the absolute worst. One minute you’re sipping cocoa, the next you’re fantasizing about running away from the dinner table and hiding in your car. You love your family, but let’s be honest: they can drive you crazy. That’s why in this episode I’m giving you tools you can actually use in real time. You’ll learn a simple 90-second reset that calms your body, a handful of one-line phrases that stop conflict without escalating it, and a repair strategy you

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45:15

357. Talk So They Lean In: The 5 Moves for Difficult...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/11/03

Hard conversations don’t usually blow up because of the issue itself. They blow up because of the moves we make in the moment. You’ve been there: you bring up money, or intimacy, or family dynamics, and suddenly you’re in the middle of a fight you didn’t want, wondering how it went sideways so fast. The good news? You don’t need more guts or more clever comebacks. You need a better playbook. Today I’ll teach you the five moves that keep defensiveness low and collaboration high. You’ll learn the

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33:03

356. When Kindness Has Claws: Dealing With Relational...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/10/27

Ever had someone freeze you out of a group text? Spread just enough gossip to make you doubt yourself? Smile to your face while subtly undermining you behind your back? That’s not just “drama,” it’s a form of bullying called relational aggression, and it can wreck friendships, families, and entire communities if it’s left unchecked. It’s not just drama. It’s emotional sabotage. Today, I’m breaking down what relational aggression really is, why it’s so destructive, and the research-backed strategies

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23:41

355. What to Do When Someone Gives You the Silent...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/10/20

You’re in a conflict, and suddenly, silence. No texts. No words. Just... nothing. It’s like you’re talking to a ghost. Whether it's your partner, parent, best friend, or coworker, the silent treatment isn’t just frustrating. It can be manipulative, even emotionally abusive. Today, I’m breaking down why people do it, how it messes with your brain, and what you can do instead of spiraling. Because begging for scraps of communication isn’t connection. And you deserve better than

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39:34

354. How to Get Motivated and Stay Motivated:...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/10/13

Ever notice how you can get excited about something in the beginning, but then totally lose steam? You start a new meditation practice, promise yourself you’ll speak more kindly to your partner, or commit to exercising. At first, you feel that spark. But then life gets busy, the excitement fades, and suddenly your motivation’s gone.Here’s the problem: what you do to get motivated isn’t what you do to stay motivated. It’s like lighting a campfire. You use kindling to get it going, but you need bigger

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29:41

353. When to Speak Up: What to Do If You Think Your...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/10/06

You’re sitting across from your friend, watching them light up when their partner texts, and your stomach turns. Something feels off. You’ve seen the controlling behavior, the subtle put-downs, the “jokes” that aren’t really funny. You love your friend, and you’re worried. But what do you do with that? Do you say something and risk the friendship? Or do you stay quiet and hope they figure it out on their own?____________________________Full blog and show notes:

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31:37

352. Is Your Anxiety Trying to Protect You?

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/09/29

You’ve probably been taught that anxiety is a bad thing. Something to eliminate, avoid, or medicate (legally or otherwise) into oblivion. But what if I told you that anxiety, in its healthiest form, is actually trying to help you? What if anxiety wasn’t the villain in your story, but a misunderstood protector showing up in a slightly over-the-top way? This week, you're going to learn how to spot the difference between anxiety that’s working for you and anxiety that’s working you over. You’ll also

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38:40

351. Tired of Being the Scapegoat? How to Handle...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/09/22

You didn’t forget the milk, cause the delay, or ruin the weekend plans. But here you are, somehow the one being blamed. Again. Whether it’s a partner, friend, or parent, being on the receiving end of blame is frustrating, confusing, and downright crazy-making. It’s like they’ve outsourced their emotional homework to you and you’re the one getting detention. Today we’ll unpack why some people love to point the finger, how it warps your relationships, and what you can do about it without turning into

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40:30

350. Can You Be in Love but Live Apart? The Truth...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/09/15

What if the healthiest thing for your relationship… was your own front door? Living Apart Together (LAT) is a growing trend where committed couples choose to maintain separate households while staying emotionally and romantically connected. It flies in the face of the cultural script that says love means living under one roof, sharing a fridge, and arguing about thermostat settings. But LAT isn’t about avoiding intimacy or commitment. It’s about redefining what commitment looks like. In this

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45:19

349. Can AI Replace Your Therapist? Here’s What You...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/09/08

Let’s be real. AI is everywhere, and it’s not just writing grocery lists or your kid’s English essay anymore, it’s sliding into the therapist’s chair. Whether you’ve toyed with ChatGPT as your late-night sounding board or downloaded an AI mental health app, it’s tempting to think: “Maybe I don’t need to pay someone $200 an hour when I’ve got free therapy in my pocket.” But is that really therapy or is it just tech playing dress-up? Today we’re diving into whether AI can actually replace a human

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49:45

348. Love Goggles: Why You Ignore Red Flags When...

Relationships Made Easy ·

2025/09/01

Ever wonder why love makes you overlook the obvious red flags? 🛑 Your brain is literally on a chemical high. In this episode, Dr. Abby Medcalf reveals the neuroscience of why love is blind, how dopamine and oxytocin hijack your judgment, and what you can do to see the truth before it’s too late. This isn’t about blaming yourself for missing the signs. It’s about owning your power and learning how to love with your eyes wide open.___________________________Full blog and show notes:

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381 results

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