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PODCAST

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled

In the 25+ years Janet Lansbury has worked with children and parents, she"s learned a lot. She"s here to share it with you. Each episode of Unruffled addresses a reader"s parenting issue through the lens of Janet"s respectful parenting approach, consistently offering a perspective shift that ultimately frees parents of the need for scripts, strategies, tricks, and tactics. Janet is a parenting author and consultant whose website (JanetLansbury.com) is visited by millions of readers annually. Her

kids & family parenting

All Episodes

00:20:54

When Children Seem Troubled by Our Emotions and Moods

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2022/01/06

A parent writes that she and her husband are concerned their toddler feels responsible for their emotions. This is a trait they both recognize from their own backgrounds. “He asks again and again, ‘Happy, mommy?’ as if he’s trying to help me be happy.” This mom says that if she admits that, no, she is not entirely happy at the moment, he gives her hugs and cuddles and persists in asking if she's happy. While these parents want to foster their child’s empathy and sensitivity, they don’t want him

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00:41:58

A Holistic Approach to Baby and Toddler Sleep (with...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/12/15

Pediatric sleep expert Grace Koinange joins Janet this week to share her experience, knowledge, and a few secrets for helping babies and toddlers to sleep. Janet had the privilege of seeing Grace in action and was impressed by her ability to tune in to a baby's most subtle cues and support his individual sleep rhythm. Grace and Janet discuss consistency, self-confidence, nurturing sleep from infancy, helping a toddler transition to a new sleeping arrangement, and trust in the child as an active

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00:27:33

It Had to Be You - The Struggles and Joys of Raising...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/12/01

Loryn Brantz is an author, illustrator, and comic creator raising a daughter with disabilities. Dalia was born with a rare genetic abnormality that made feeding an all-night process, and doctors were not confident she would ever crawl, much less walk. Throughout their journey, Loryn has supported Dalia with acceptance, optimism, and love. In return, she is continually inspired. “I see her disability and her uniqueness as part of what makes her so amazing and special. And everything she does is going

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00:30:13

Finding Our Best Response to Children's Turbulent...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/11/10

Janet responds to emails from parents who describe struggling with their children’s strong emotions. One writes that her 2-year-old rejects her comfort when he has a meltdown: “It breaks my heart, and I feel like I must be doing something wrong.” Another writes that her 7-year-old says he doesn’t feel love from his mother. Another email describes how a 3-year-old’s tantrums last all afternoon and into the evening, disrupting the rest of the family’s routine, and they “all feel trapped by a

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00:21:04

How to Stop Feeling Frustrated by Your Child's...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/10/20

Janet shares a family's inspiring success story about dealing with their 3.5-year-old’s repeated, seemingly wanton problem behavior. The parent admits that both she and her husband were frustrated and “triggered” by the behavior, and they reacted with anger and scolding. The situation came to a head when their boy started lying about his actions, which was particularly hurtful to his dad. After reading some of Janet’s advice, they were able to consider their child’s POV with empathy and realize how

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00:23:36

Morning Meltdowns - Asserting Our Boundaries with...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/10/14

A parent writes that her 4-year-old daughter begins each morning by screaming and wailing, and the routine has worn this mom down. “It gets right under my skin,” she admits, “and makes me want to run away.” While she does acknowledge her daughter’s emotions in these moments, tries to understand and be patient, she has to get ready for work and sometimes ends up yelling or crying herself. This mom wants to know: “Just how long should I spend offering comfort before I make good on my plan to take care

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00:36:02

It Will Get Easier - The Intense Struggles of a...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/10/07

A courageous “Unruffled” listener shares how Janet’s respectful parenting approach seemed an impossible goal during a dark period of self-discovery, but it also presented a beacon of hope. As she struggled to come to grips with recovered memories of her childhood abuse, her relationship with her two young children was combative and destructive. She was left feeling like a complete failure, unable to parent in the loving, respectful way she had always imagined. Her journey to the other side of this

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00:25:51

My Child Is So Mean to Me

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/09/29

A parent's email describes her 4-year-old daughter as smart, funny, incredibly strong-willed, but sometimes “downright mean.” While she appreciates her child’s spirit and doesn’t want to stifle that, when she says mean things to her she doesn’t feel it’s enough to simply acknowledge her daughter’s emotions and let slide her hurtful words and behavior. “I need her to find a better way to express that she is angry with me,” she writes. Janet offers a perspective on the situation that she believes will

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00:34:11

Parental Burnout and a Reasonable Approach to Screens...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/09/16

Janet’s guest is Dr. Meghan Owenz, a psychologist, professor, parent, and author. Meghan’s new book “Spoiled Right: Delaying Screens and Giving Children What They Really Need” offers the latest research on the effects of screens on young children along with a plethora of practical alternatives. Both Janet and Meghan acknowledge that during the last many months of homeschooling, severely limited socializing, and close quarters, exhausted parents have understandably relied on screens to get some

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00:28:19

Navigating the Playground with a Child Who Seems Too...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/09/09

Janet offers her advice for navigating typical playground behaviors in preschool-aged children, such as physical aggression, bossiness and shyness. Whether our child is exhibiting these behaviors or is on the receiving end of another child's dysregulation, Janet shares how helping children to feel understood, protected, and supported encourages the most positive learning process. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day

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00:20:46

Attention-Getting, Inappropriate Behavior

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/09/03

A parent writes that her 3.5-year-old just started pre-school and has been bringing home some new behaviors like “lifting her dress to expose her bottom… or making poop and fart sounds.” She especially likes to perform these behaviors for her grandparents or when company comes over. “I like to be funny,” she says. This mom has tried several strategies to reign in her daughter, including ignoring the behavior, but so far without success. Janet offers perspective on both the little girl’s behavior --

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00:22:12

Can We Be Angry or Sad and Still Unruffled?

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/08/18

A parent struggles to control emotions like anger, frustration, and disappointment when they’re triggered by her toddler. While she strives to be a confident leader by appearing calm and unruffled, she also wants to model her emotions authentically for her child. Janet clarifies what it really means to be "unruffled" and how parents can approach this goal without faking or stuffing their emotions. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible,

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00:24:00

Mealtime Manners Begin with Babies

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/08/11

Janet offers advice for handling some of the most common complaints parents share about their children's mealtime behavior: throwing food on the floor, leaving and then returning to the table, refusing to eat certain foods, and lingering endlessly. Janet shares her view that all of these behaviors reflect 3 basic needs children have at mealtime, and by recognizing and filling those needs, the behaviors ultimately subside. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's

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00:29:35

"Earlier Is Better" And Other Child Development Myths...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/08/04

Early childhood education luminary Rae Pica joins Janet to share her expertise about how children really learn and to debunk some common parenting myths that can impede a child’s natural development. Rae has dedicated herself to the mission of developing and educating the whole child. She is the author of 20 books, a popular keynote speaker, and throughout her decades-long career has consulted with numerous diverse public and private groups as well as schools and health departments throughout the

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00:25:56

When Your Child Keeps Ignoring Boundaries and...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/07/21

Three different families write to Janet about their children's challenging behaviors. In one case, a 2.5-year-old has resumed an old behavior of hitting and scratching, “but this time around it feels like he’s doing it with more purpose.” Another parent says that when their 5-year-old exhibits rude behavior and is called on it, he gets angry and accuses both parents of being mean to him. A third parent writes that her son loves rule breaking, often in dangerous situations, and that “his eyes light

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00:32:05

Race, Trauma, and Hope – A Mother’s Healing Journey...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/07/14

Cassandra Lane is an author, Editor-in-Chief of “LA Parent Magazine,” and a mother (something she vowed she would never be). She joins Janet to discuss her new book “We Are Bridges” in which her personal journey from a childhood of poverty and racism to motherhood is juxtaposed against the traumas and upheavals of her ancestors. Her artful storytelling, both memoir and historical imagining, reminds us that we are all inextricably linked to our ancestors, both genetically and experientially. "Not

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00:26:19

Helping Toddlers Get Their Social Mojo Back

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/07/07

Recently parents have written to Janet with concerns about their toddlers who are venturing back into the world post-Covid and seem afraid to interact with other children and adults. Several parents even use a similar description of their child seeming ‘frozen’ as they watch activity on a playground but refuse to join in. Janet offers some insight into what’s going on in these toddlers' minds and advice about how to support them during this transition. For more advice on common parenting issues,

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00:25:17

YES Spaces - What They Really Are and Why They Matter

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/06/23

A YES space is a gift to both children and their parents. It offers children ownership of a safe place that encourages play, learning, creativity, agency, and a strong sense of self. Parents get to enjoy one of the great pleasures of parenting: observing their infant or toddler as they explore and master the world around them. Janet describes YES spaces in form and function, dispelling some common misconceptions and sharing tips about how children and parents can benefit the most. For more advice

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00:34:35

ADHD and How to Support All Children to Fulfill Their...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/06/09

ADHD and career coach Lynn Miner-Rosen is unique among counselors because her own life experience includes two children with ADHD, as well as her own mid-life diagnosis. In the face of severe personal crises, Lynn re-invented herself professionally time and again, and she uses these experiences to bring insight, empathy, and encouragement to both parents of children with ADHD and adult clients seeking self-knowledge and career direction. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out

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00:20:02

How Our Boundaries Free Children to Play, Create, and...

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled ·

2021/05/26

Janet discusses children's crucial need for boundaries and how our authentic responses can free kids up to create and explore. She shares a success story from a parent who says that her son began constantly demanding she draws pictures for him after she "made a rookie mistake” by drawing for him one time. From that moment on, her son became obsessed: “Inside, he’d bring me crayons and paper, and outside, he’d bring me sidewalk chalk and demand drawings.” She quickly realized that she didn’t want to

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