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PODCAST

The Covert Narcissism Podcast

Renee Swanson, Bleav

Covert narcissistic abuse crushes one’s soul. This podcast is devoted to understanding covert narcissistic abuse, its effect on the victims, and how to heal.

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

20:12

Devalue Your Abuser

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/08/27

He was my knight in shining armor. The perfect match. My soul mate. I even said that I feel like he is the male version of me and that I am the female version of him. How in the world did I end up so swept off of my feet like this? So wrapped up in him? What happened? What exactly is love bombing? What effect does it have? How do I break the spell? I recently had a group member say that she wasn’t love bombed and that she doesn’t really understand what that is. She said that she wasn’t smothered

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16:42

Q&A with Debbie Mirza Part 3 - When Their Image Looks...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/08/24

It is such an honor to have Debbie Mirza on my podcast. She has been a huge part of my own healing journey, and I want to make her part of yours too. She has so much to offer to victims of covert narcissistic abuse. Debbie is the author of the International Best-selling Book titled, The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist. She has also written Worthy of Love and The Safest Place Possible. She is a Restorative Coach, working with people who have experienced CN. Working with men and women on this

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17:12

Breaking the Trauma Bond

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/08/20

Why can’t I just leave? What’s wrong with me? I need to get out, but I just can’t. The Cleveland Clinic defines trauma bonding as when a person who is or has been abused feels a connection to their abuser. It’s a situation where we form a strong attachment to someone who is causing us harm. It often fuels a cycle of abuse and affection that can be difficult to break. According to Psychology Today, Trauma-bonding is a hormonal attachment created by repeated abuse, sprinkled with being “saved” every

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17:07

Q&A with Debbie Mirza Part 2 - How to Move On

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/08/17

It is such an honor to have Debbie Mirza on my podcast. She has been a huge part of my own healing journey, and I want to make her part of yours too. She has so much to offer to victims of covert narcissistic abuse. Debbie is the author of the International Best-selling Book titled, The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist. She has also written Worthy of Love and The Safest Place Possible. She is a Restorative Coach, working with people who have experienced CN. Working with men and women on this

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16:54

Development of a Trauma Bond

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/08/13

Do you find yourself fighting for this relationship, knowing that it is unhealthy, toxic, manipulative, maybe you even know that it is abusive? But you desperately cling to it out of a sense of fear, obligation or even guilt? The thought of leaving it causes intense anxiety and panic in you. The inability to breathe, to think, to function. This panic is only calmed by the thought of connecting with your seemingly abusive partner. Why is this? What is wrong with me? My feelings feel so irrational. I

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22:59

Q&A with Debbie Mirza - How to Heal

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/08/10

It is such an honor to have Debbie Mirza on my podcast. She has been a huge part of my own healing journey, and I want to make her part of yours too. She has so much to offer to victims of covert narcissistic abuse. Debbie is the author of the International Best-selling Book titled, The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist. She has also written Worthy of Love and The Safest Place Possible. She is a Restorative Coach, working with people who have experienced CN. Working with men and women on this

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19:22

Vulnerable Narcissists, a Contradiction of Terms

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/08/06

Vulnerable narcissists? What? Is that really a thing? Can a narcissist be vulnerable? I’ve never seen one that can. I’ve said for a long time that the inability to be vulnerable is one of the determining signs of someone being narcissistic. Their guard is thick, and they just cannot ever be vulnerable. So why would we call them vulnerable narcissists? What do we mean by that? Vulnerable narcissism is another name for covert narcissism. These two terms are used interchangeably. Vulnerable

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14:11

A Grenade Inside a Tank (Special Throwback Episode)

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/08/04

Someone who has experienced covert narcissistic abuse is like a grenade inside a tank. On the inside, you are wound up so incredibly tight, over-thinking everything, over-analyzing everything. Just waiting to explode. On the outside, you are a fortress of steel. You have a wall of protection around you, afraid to say anything, to do anything, trusting no one, letting no one in. A grenade inside a tank. I’m Renee Swanson, your host and creator of the Covert Narcissism Podcast. Today I am talking

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18:45

Seeing Your Own Reactive Abuse

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/07/30

So, I want to paint a picture here. Imagine with me. For many of you, this will be incredibly easy to imagine, because you have lived it. You grow up believing in the goodness of others. You believe that others desire peace in life and that they care about those around them. You believe that everyone has a conscience and will feel bad when they hurt someone, especially those that they love. That they will work to reconcile. That they’ll put the effort in to make things right, apologizing for their

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24:50

4 Hooks that Covert Narcissists Use to Rope You back...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/07/29

Covert narcissists are experts at hooking a victim back in over and over and over. They know how to play on your sympathy. They know how to make you feel guilty and responsible for their well-being. They know how to make you feel needed and thus you stay to help them. So many victims of covert narcissists spend years and decades of wanting to leave the relationship only to be hooked back in again and again. Start learning what these hooks look like, how to recognize them for what they are, and how

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19:55

When I Actually Filed, Part Two

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/07/23

To donate to the Covert Narcissism Podcast click the link below. https://patron.podbean.com/covertnarcissismpodcast Ten days! Ten days was the amount of time between me telling him I was filing for divorce and actually filing. The papers were all ready when I told him. I told him on Saturday and planned to file on that Monday. Had the appointment all set up. But he asked if I could give him a week. Why? He wanted time to think about it. I said, “It won’t make any difference. Nothing is going to

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15:34

The Bone Dry Exhaustion of Life with a Covert...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/07/20

A narcissistic person cannot even do step A to help a relationship. You can wear the entire alphabet out multiple times, and they still haven't even found step A. Not even a tiny step. Nothing! The level of exhaustion that comes with this is unbelievable. It is a bone dry emptiness. I had absolutely nothing left in my tank. I was on empty! So why do we wear ourselves out so much trying to make the relationship work? Why do we work so hard at it? What if we put all that effort into ourselves? It is

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18:27

I Want Out! Now What? Part One

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/07/16

To donate to the Covert Narcissism Podcast click the link below. https://patron.podbean.com/covertnarcissismpodcast “I can’t live like this anymore. I want out. I’m done.” So you say this to your spouse, totally exhausted and meaning every word. You are done. But then this strange thing happens. Here you are, still in the home with them. You might have said these words and left for a while, or maybe they left for a while. But evening comes, and here you are in the home together. Now what? Do I

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16:39

Interview About Covert Narcissism (Special Throwback...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/07/13

Victims of covert narcissism have so many questions running through their mind. While I do get asked many questions, some questions show up in almost every conversation. How did you realize you were with a covert narcissist? What is a covert narcissist? What does a relationship with a covert narcissist look like? What do I do now? Where can I find help? I was recently interviewed regarding covert narcissism. In this interview, I answer these questions and more. Here are clips from that interview. I

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21:18

The Wounds from Childhood

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/07/09

To donate to the Covert Narcissism Podcast click the link below. https://patron.podbean.com/covertnarcissismpodcast Everyone carries wounds from childhood. No matter how healthy and attentive your parents were, you did not get through childhood unscathed. No one does. Everyone has some wounds. That does not make you damaged or bad. It just makes you human. When we have an emotional need that is not met as a child, we often abandon that need in order to survive. Maybe it wasn’t met because our

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20:54

Just Hard to Relax - Living in a Courtroom with a...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/07/06

Living with a covert narcissist is like trying to live in a war zone or in a courtroom when you are the one on trial. My son is traveling this week with his dad, who is a covert narcissist. I have been nervous about this trip and sincerely hope that everything goes well for them. I texted my son on their second day out and asked how it was going. His words spoke volumes. He said that it is going ok but it is just hard to relax. This is exactly how life is with a covert narcissist. You never feel

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15:59

Conditioned to Accept Their Behavior

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/07/02

Today we are talking about conditioning, the process of training someone to behave in a certain way or to accept certain circumstances. In the Boy Who Cried Wolf, the villagers became conditioned to his cries. Like the boy in the story, covert narcissists set off alarm bells when they are not needed. They stir up drama and trouble when there isn’t any there. Claiming that they hate drama, they are the first ones to create it. It is almost as though they are bored with life unless the drama is

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21:13

Q&A Session on Parenting With a Toxic Partner...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/06/29

Parenting with a toxic partner is the single hardest thing I have ever done in life. It is a living nightmare! You are not co-parenting. You are counter parenting. You are working against the negative energy of that other parent. You spend enormous amounts of energy simply trying to counter the damage that they are doing to their own children. It is exhausting and impossible. Yet for the sake of your own children, it is a task that you will give everything you have in order to be successful. I hope

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16:28

Emotional Childishness of Covert Narcissists

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/06/25

Will they ever grow up?? Am I dealing with a child or an adult? Sometimes I really am not sure. I’ve talked before about the lack of emotional growth in covert narcissists. They grow physically, mentally, even socially and in other ways. But not emotionally. Their emotional growth stopped at some point in their childhood, for various reasons, typically some sort of trauma including emotional neglect. So they can certainly seem like a child when it comes to emotions, but they are trapped in an

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19:48

Shouldn’t I Just Be Grateful that it isn’t Worse?...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2023/06/22

This podcast is audio taken from 2 short video clips that I made just recently. I want to share it here! The first piece is Shouldn't I just be Grateful that it isn't Worse? So many people have it worse than I do. Should I just be happy that I am not in their situation? Just because others may have it worse (and that is a matter of opinion itself) does not take anything away from the pain you are experiencing. If you are questioning this, please listen to this piece! The second part is Everything is

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