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PODCAST

The Covert Narcissism Podcast

Renee Swanson, Bleav

Covert narcissistic abuse crushes one’s soul. This podcast is devoted to understanding covert narcissistic abuse, its effect on the victims, and how to heal.

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

00:31:43

Covert Narcissistic Abuse: How to Move Forward...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/03/26

If you’re trying to heal from covert narcissistic abuse but feel unsure about your next step, this episode will meet you where you are. In part 2 of this CNG Community Chat, we explore what it looks like to move forward without rushing a life-changing decision.This conversation dives into the deeper layers of recovery, including guilt, responsibility, and the impact on children. We also talk about the reality of co-parenting or parallel parenting with a covert narcissist, and why healing often

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00:23:16

The War Inside You: Why Part of You Still Misses Them...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/03/22

Why do you still miss them… even after everything you’ve been through?If you’ve experienced covert narcissistic abuse, you may find yourself stuck in an internal battle—one part of you sees the truth clearly, while another part still longs for connection, hope, or what you thought the relationship was. This emotional conflict can feel confusing, frustrating, and even shameful. In this episode, we explore why that inner war exists and how understanding your internal system can bring clarity and

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00:31:03

Covert Narcissism: You’re Allowed to Pause Before...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/03/19

If you’re in a relationship that feels confusing, overwhelming, or emotionally draining, you may be wondering if you’re dealing with covert narcissism—and whether you should stay or leave. In this part one of the CNG Community Chat, we explore why that decision can feel so difficult and why you don’t have to rush it. Through a real community conversation, we talk about the emotional toll of covert narcissistic abuse, including self-doubt, guilt, fear, and the pressure to figure everything out right

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00:22:19

5 Questions to Ask Yourself When Covert Narcissism...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/03/15

Last week’s episode explored why covert narcissism appears to be thriving in today’s culture and the conditions that allow these behaviors to remain hidden. In this follow-up episode, we bring the conversation closer to everyday life.If covert narcissistic dynamics can hide so easily in our culture, how do you begin recognizing them in your own interactions? In this episode, Renee Swanson shares five questions you can quietly ask yourself when something feels confusing or off in a relationship

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00:27:22

The Invisible Rulebook: The Strange Rules Covert...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/03/12

In relationships with a covert narcissist, control doesn’t always appear as obvious demands. Instead, it often shows up through a confusing set of small, unwritten "rules" that quietly shape everyday life. The problems come not from preferences. We all have preferences. But with a covert narcissist, these are rules with punishments. In this episode, Renee shares real responses from her CNG Facebook community about the strangest and most confusing rules they were expected to follow while living with

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00:29:19

Why Covert Narcissism Is Thriving in Today’s Culture:...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/03/08

Is narcissism actually increasing, or are we simply becoming more aware of it? The truth is that narcissistic traits have always existed throughout history. What changes over time is the environment those traits grow in.In this episode, we explore why covert narcissism seems to be thriving in today’s culture and why these behaviors can be so difficult to recognize. Unlike overt narcissism, which is loud and obvious, covert narcissism often hides behind kindness, sensitivity, and a carefully managed

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00:38:12

Recognizing Covert Narcissism: From Self-Blame to...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/03/05

In Part 2 of this community chat, we move from confusion to clarity.After years—sometimes decades—of minimizing behavior and blaming themselves, these women share what finally shifted. What happens when you stop asking, “What’s wrong with me?” and start asking, “What’s really happening here?” We talk about: The slow accumulation that leads to clarity Questioning their behavior instead of your own Rebuilding self-trust after covert narcissistic abuse The emotional toll of living in

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00:24:17

Covert Narcissism and Children: Signs the Kids Are...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/03/01

If you are living with covert narcissism in your marriage and starting to notice changes in your children — depression, anxiety, slipping grades, withdrawal, golden child or scapegoat dynamics — this episode is for you.In this episode, we explore how covert narcissism affects children, including the subtle but powerful ways kids adapt to emotional unpredictability inside the home. When one child becomes the high-achieving “golden child,” another absorbs blame as the “scapegoat,” and another

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00:31:52

Covert Narcissism Community Chat: Why Was It So Hard...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/02/26

Why is it so difficult to recognize covert narcissistic abuse when you’re living inside it?In Part 1 of this community chat, Olivia, Cindy, and Shannon share why they couldn’t call their relationships abusive for years—even decades. When emotional abuse is subtle, mixed with good moments, public charm, and messages like “marriage is just hard,” the confusion runs deep. We talk about: Growing up with normalized dysfunction Calling it “communication problems” instead of abuse Faith,

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00:22:24

Covert Narcissism and the Nervous System: Why You...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/02/22

If you feel “too emotional,” hypersensitive, or unstable in your relationship, this episode will help you understand what is really happening. Today we are exploring covert narcissism and the nervous system — and why what looks like emotional reactivity is often a biological response to unpredictability, invalidation, and emotional disconnection.In covert narcissistic dynamics, you are often labeled as the reactive one. The dramatic one. The one who can’t let things go. Meanwhile, your partner

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00:33:22

Covert Narcissism Q&A: Clarity, Boundaries & Radical...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/02/19

In Part 2 of this Q&A pulled directly from the Covert Narcissism Group Facebook page, we continue answering the real, unfiltered questions so many of you are quietly carrying. Why does couples therapy sometimes make things worse? Why won’t they answer even the simplest questions directly? How do you rebuild self-trust after years of gaslighting? And what does radical acceptance actually look like when you’re still untangling fantasy from reality? This episode moves from confusion into clarity. We

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00:23:04

Gaslighting Without the Drama: The Subtle Reality

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/02/15

In this episode, we break down what subtle gaslighting looks like in covert narcissistic relationships and why it’s so hard to recognize. You’ll learn how emotional manipulation can sound calm, reasonable, and even compassionate—while quietly eroding your self-trust.Not all gaslighting is loud. Sometimes it’s delivered gently. Sometimes it contains just enough truth to make you hesitate. Instead of “That never happened,” it’s “That’s not exactly how it happened.” Instead of “You’re crazy,” it’s

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00:33:03

Covert Narcissism Q&A: The Questions You’re Afraid to...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/02/12

In this special Q&A episode pulled directly from the Covert Narcissism Group Facebook page, I’m answering some of the most honest — and often unspoken — questions about living with and healing from covert narcissistic dynamics. Why do conversations go in circles? Why does couples therapy sometimes make things worse? Why can they be so charming one moment and so hurtful the next? And how do you protect your clarity when you feel like you’re constantly doubting yourself? If you’ve ever wondered

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00:24:37

The Loneliness of Covert Narcissism: Why You Feel...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/02/08

If you feel lonely even when you’re not alone, this episode will help you understand why. In The Loneliness of Covert Narcissism: Why You Feel Invisible Even When You’re Not Alone, we explore emotional invisibility, the quiet isolation that happens in covert narcissistic relationships, and why being truly seen can feel so rare—and so deeply relieving.Many survivors describe the loneliest place as sitting beside their partner, realizing they are not truly known. In this episode, we talk about why

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00:38:02

The Exhaustion of Always Being the One Who Tries With...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/02/05

Today’s episode is about covert narcissism and the deep exhaustion that comes from always being the one who tries in the relationship. If you’re living with or recovering from a covert narcissist, you may recognize this immediately: you’re the one who explains, softens, repairs, revisits conversations, manages emotions, and keeps hoping that if you say it just right, things will finally change. Instead, you end up emotionally depleted, confused, and wondering why nothing ever sticks. In this

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00:21:17

Covert Narcissism and Self-Blame: Why You Always Feel...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/02/01

Today, we unpack how covert narcissistic dynamics quietly train thoughtful, self-reflective people to carry blame that was never theirs.In this episode, we explore how normal, everyday questions—like asking about errands, timing, or work logistics—can somehow turn into tension, shutdowns, or accusations. Over time, those repeated interactions begin to reshape your inner dialogue, leaving you questioning your tone, your intent, and eventually your worth. We’ll look at why self-reflective people are

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00:25:17

The Reality of Covert Narcissism Within a 42-Year...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/01/29

What does covert narcissistic abuse look like when it unfolds slowly over decades—without obvious explosions, without outsiders seeing the damage?In this episode, Renee speaks with Shari, who shares her lived experience of spending 42 years in a marriage that gradually became confusing, destabilizing, and emotionally exhausting. Shari reflects on the subtle but devastating dynamics of covert narcissism, including triangulation, passive aggression, emotional coldness, cognitive dissonance, and the

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00:21:22

Covert Narcissism and Over-Explaining: Why Pausing...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/01/25

Many survivors of covert narcissistic abuse feel calmer the moment they stop explaining themselves. In this episode, we explore why over-explaining becomes a survival response, how hypervigilance and emotional exhaustion keep the nervous system on high alert, and why pausing brings real relief.For many people, explaining didn’t come from insecurity—it came from learning that safety depended on being understood. Over time, this pattern trains the body to stay in fight-or-flight, constantly preparing

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00:38:39

Covert Narcissism in Dating: Jacquie Roar Shares Her...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/01/22

Dating someone with covert narcissistic traits rarely feels abusive at first. In fact, it often feels intoxicating—intense attention, deep emotional connection, and a sense of being chosen in a way you may never have experienced before. This episode explores why that intensity feels so powerful—and why it so often turns confusing, controlling, and unsafe. In this deeply honest conversation, Jacquie Roar shares her personal story of navigating covert narcissism in a dating relationship. She talks

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00:19:14

Covert Narcissistic Dynamics: Is This Normal Marriage...

The Covert Narcissism Podcast ·

2026/01/18

This episode explores how to tell the difference between normal marriage struggles and covert narcissistic dynamics. We focus on the subtle patterns that create confusion, self-doubt, and the fear that you might be overreacting or expecting too much.Many people living inside covert narcissistic dynamics aren’t dealing with constant conflict or obvious cruelty. Instead, they’re navigating moments that almost feel normal—disagreements that never resolve, conversations that leave them questioning

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431 results

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