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PODCAST

Your Secret Is Safe With Me

Dr. Marie Murphy

Dr. Marie Murphy talks about infidelity and other challenging relationship situations from a non-judgmental perspective. She shares practical tools and advice from her own coaching practice to help you make changes in your love life, and interviews professionals with complementary expertise, such as family law attorneys, mediators, non-violent communication specialists, and more. In addition, Marie discusses the social and historical context of romantic relationships to provide perspective on our

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

44:01

191. Are You Just Having a Midlife Crisis?

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/06/06

There is a common belief that marriage should last a lifetime. So when somebody decides that they are dissatisfied with life as they know it, and engage in an infidelity situation as a result, it is commonly labeled as a midlife crisis. But what if waking up one morning and deciding you are dissatisfied with your life is a wonderful opportunity to reexamine what you want and what you want to do about it? This week, I show you why engaging in infidelity isn’t always a symptom of a midlife crisis,

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49:21

190. The Magic Button

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/05/23

The Magic Button that I’m diving deeper into this week is the one you wish you could push to answer all your questions about your infidelity situation. The one that, when you push it, your infidelity situation magically resolves in a way that you are delighted with, without you having to do much of anything. That magic button would solve all your problems, right? I teach you how to contend with things that are challenging in your life and infidelity situation in a way that is most empowering for

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56:03

189. Scandal, Disgrace, and Redemption

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/05/09

People often freak out when infidelity occurs, even if it has pretty much zero impact on their lives. It gets treated as a big scandal that the "perpetrator" needs to redeem themselves from. Whether or not you buy into the idea that scandal, disgrace, and redemption are real things, other people turning your experiences into a public spectacle is a very real thing, and it's a pretty big deal. Tune in this week to discover what you need to consider if you find yourself the object of a scandalous

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41:52

188. When Your Affair Partner Leaves You for the...

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/04/25

Have you ever found yourself in an affair situation with someone who is monogamously committed to someone else? For a while, your partner is pretty sure they want to leave that relationship and pursue a non-affair relationship with you. They share their intentions to leave their partner for weeks, months, or even years, and they may even take action to prove these intentions. Then, one day, your affair partner reaches the point where they decide that they can’t leave their committed relationship

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45:00

187. It's Okay to Change Your Mind

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/04/11

How often do you make a decision that you think you’re happy with, then doubt yourself and fear it was the wrong one because you feel so many mixed emotions about it? When you make a major decision in your life, about your infidelity situation or otherwise, you are most likely going to have mixed thoughts and feelings about it, but that DOESN’T mean it’s a problem or a sign you should choose differently. In this week’s episode of Your Secret Is Safe With Me, learn why it is completely okay to

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52:28

186. Why I Do the Work I Do (Part 2)

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/03/28

Join me for part two of "Why I Do the Work I Do" as I share the turning point that led me to become a relationship coach specializing in non-judgmental assistance to people engaging in infidelity, and exactly what it took for me to get here. I’m picking up where I left off last week and sharing the power of taking small steps forward, even when your confidence is wavering, and how I created this unique role for myself despite believing for a while that I didn’t have what it takes to be an

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01:02:14

185: Why I Do the Work I Do (Part 1)

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/03/21

As you may be aware, “non-judgmental infidelity coach” is not a common job description that exists out there in the world, at least not to my knowledge. This thing I do and the angle I take is pretty unique, and I am dedicated to offering non-judgmental guidance to people actively engaging in any form of infidelity. But how did I get here? What exactly led me to do the work I do? In this week’s episode, I share where my interest in all things sexuality and the stigma surrounding it came from, and

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25:22

184. The Point of Resolving Your Infidelity Situation...

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/03/14

At some point, the drawbacks of your infidelity situation can start to outweigh the benefits, and if this happens for you, you may want to start thinking about taking a conscious, deliberate approach to resolving your infidelity situation in a way you feel good about. Yes it might feel hard at first – so hard that you may decide that you’d rather stay put and continue to accept the status quo – but here’s the thing: staying stuck and stressed is NOT your only option. It is NOT as hard to resolve

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40:50

183. When Your Affair is Over, You May be Bored

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/03/07

If you experience boredom after you’ve stopped engaging in infidelity, you may not know what to do with yourself, and you are NOT alone. Post-infidelity boredom is a thing, but fortunately for you, I have some recommendations to help you deal with it. In this episode, I share why you might find yourself feeling bored once you end your infidelity situation, some examples of what this can look like and indications that you are feeling this way, and how to examine your overall satisfaction with life

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31:40

182. Why Considering Non-Monogamy Might Not be Helpful

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/02/29

In this week’s episode, I talk about why exploring non-monogamy COULD be a way to resolve your infidelity situation… and when why exploring non-monogamy may NOT going to be an effective way to resolve your infidelity situation. As non-monogamy becomes a more and more legitimate way to configure our relationships, it’s increasingly important to use discretion when we’re wondering if turning a monogamous relationship into a non-monogamous one will help us resolve our infidelity situation. Get full

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42:06

181. How to Tell Someone You've Cheated on Them

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/02/22

Before initiating the conversation with your partner about your affair, there are some things you need to be clear on. In today’s episode, I discuss how to tell your partner about your affair and provide tips on how to approach this conversation in two different kinds of circumstances. When you find yourself in the situation of telling your partner about your affair, there are many things you can choose to say, ways you can react, and ways you can disclose your infidelity. Learn how to have this

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31:45

180. When Your Affair Partner Has an Agenda for You

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/02/15

Is your affair partner invested in helping you leave your committed relationship? In today’s episode, I explain the importance of understanding the extent to which your focus is on your affair partner’s desires and how to be aware if the decisions you’re making are for yourself. Even if you want the same things your affair partner wants, you each have to take your own path to get there, and it’s important that you differentiate wanting something and actually deciding to do it. Learn the key thing

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36:16

179. How Long Should You Wait for Your Affair Partner...

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/02/08

Today, I look at the question of how long you should wait for your affair partner to leave their marriage. Maybe you don’t want to set a timeline for your partner and prefer to wait indefinitely for them to leave. Regardless of your situation, I guide you in making the decision that is right for you. Learn the questions to ask yourself and discover how to get clear on how long you are willing to wait for them, why it’s worth waiting, or why you are not willing to wait for them to leave their

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34:21

178. When You Have an Agenda for Your Affair Partner

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/02/01

Today, I’m talking to those of you who have an agenda for your affair partner. Even though you mean well, the truth is that you can only manage your own business. It’s important to let your affair partner figure things out for themselves, and today, I’ll explain why. Understanding what you want when you have an agenda, whether you realize it or not, will only help YOU deal with your infidelity situation. Hear why letting go of your agenda is good for your partner and perhaps even more so for

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34:16

177. What It’s Like to Work with Me

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/01/25

Whether you've been a dedicated listener for a while or have just recently tuned in to the podcast, you might be curious about what it's like to work together. In this episode, I share what it's like to receive my coaching and how it can benefit you, regardless of the type of infidelity situation you are in. I discuss my philosophy and approach to infidelity, explaining the three ways we can work together. You'll learn what you can expect from the Self-Guided Course, the Group Coaching Program,

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37:53

176. Fear

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/01/18

The feeling of fear is one of the things that can make infidelity situations seem so hard to deal with. There are a LOT of things that might seem scary within your infidelity situation. Will life as you know it come to an end if you choose to pursue a relationship that began as an affair? Will you kids hate you forever if you choose to end your marriage with their other parent? Will getting divorced be awful and painful? What will people think of you if they know you’ve cheated? Here’s the great

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28:12

175. The Right Tools for the Job

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/01/11

Are you ready to make some changes but don't know where to start? This week, I share some helpful tools to help you create change and resolve your infidelity situation. You might need to do things you’ve never done before, and that’s okay. I explain how the sooner you find a way to address the situation, the better your overall quality of life will be, and I also discuss the role your feelings play when making significant changes. These tools will guide you through the changes in your

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23:44

174. Believing in Your Capacity to Change

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2024/01/04

With a new year beginning, there's a feeling of change in the air for some. And maybe that change has to do with your infidelity situation. In this episode, I explore how to take charge of change in your infidelity situation, the reasons we sometimes avoid change, and why our mindset is the number one factor in making change. Tune in to learn how to be a person who takes action in a way you never have before. It is possible to feel differently about your infidelity situation, but more importantly,

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30:49

173. The Easy Hard Paradox

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2023/12/28

I believe that “difficulty” is not an absolute truth or fact but rather a matter of our thinking. In this episode, I discuss the many ways we can think differently about difficult situations. I revisit my concept of the “think, feel, act” cycle and explore how you can reshift your thinking around the idea of difficulty. When we don’t deal with the root of the problem, we usually prolong our troubles. And to not prolong our troubles, we simply need to start facing them. Tune in for some tough

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29:37

172: Missing Your Affair Partner

Your Secret Is Safe With Me ·

2023/12/21

Often, people dealing with an affair ending come up against disenfranchised grief and finding forced validity in their experience. In today’s episode, I discuss how to deal with missing your affair partner in a way that supports your feelings and reasons, regardless of your support system or situation. Learn how to get through the three main stages of your affair ending and how to honor your sense of loss in each one. Understand how to find lessons in both your heavy and freeing feelings. There’s

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231 results

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