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PODCAST

Hard Choices

From the creators of Smash Fiction, it"s horniness meets science! We examine a fictional universe and rank the f*ckability of the characters to determine the true median on our collective boner scale. Who exactly is the middle of the pack in Lord of the Rings? Who is the middle ground of sexiness in the Marvel Cinematic Universe? Just where does the horniness middle fall in Game of Thrones? We bring together a diverse array of sexualities, rank the characters, crunch the numbers, and find out truly

comedy

All Episodes

01:21:41

Hard Choices 8 - Cats the Musical

Hard Choices ·

2021/12/25

In this episode, we prowl the back alleys of London to get to the bottom of one of Andrew Lloyd Webber's defining musicals: Cats. We didn't leave Tom Hooper out of this though, because, for this episode, we're cats too. And you're a cat. We're all cats. No, no, don't look too closely at the CGI, just trust us, you're definitely a cat. Joining us to find the pick of the litter (and indulge in a surprising amount of musical numbers) are Claire Mulkerin, Miles Schneiderman, Annie Craton, and MeganBob

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01:31:08

Hard Choices 7 - The Justice League of America

Hard Choices ·

2021/11/24

Straight from an edition of the Daily Planet that Lex Luthor definitely wouldn't want you to see comes the Hard Choices rankings of 21 of the most notable members of the Justice League of America. But we don't do rankings of how strong or heroic they are, this is a podcast that investigates their skills in the area of bedroom antics. Sure, these folks can save people from an alien invasion, but can they rock your world? Four noble souls gather together to figure out the definitive f*ckability

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04:01

Patreon is Here!

Hard Choices ·

2021/11/13

We've got a Patreon! It's aimed at keeping the show sustainable, covering hosting costs, and making weird new stuff possible! Patrons get some nice perks and help guide some of the show decisions! If you want in, go visit Patreon.com/hardchoices The show Patreon is not searchable because it's adult content, which is fair enough. So, if you want to support it and get early access to the Justice League of America episode (up now!) follow the link. Thanks for all of your support and see you soon with

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01:22:47

Hard Choices 6 - Vampires

Hard Choices ·

2021/10/30

This episode of Hard Choices has to be invited into your feed because this time Kris Newton, Kit, Claire Mulkerin, and MeganBob are ranking 21 of media's most interesting vampires. No amount of holy water or garlic will spare you from the intensity of these boners. Sure, many of these vampires might kill you rather than let you make the walk of shame back to your coffin, but that's a risk we're willing to take. How dangerous is Viago? What smells would we put up with from Cassidy? Is Santanico

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01:28:47

Hard Choices 5 - Mass Effect

Hard Choices ·

2021/09/29

I'm Commander Shepard and this is my favorite episode on the Citadel. The Mass Effect universe is notoriously horny. This dating sim masquerading as a first person shooter offers all the juicy aliens you could ask for. The fuckability of these characters is undeniable, but we won't rest until we scientifically prove it. Who is the median of fuckability in this veritable buffet? We sit down and rank 21 of the most iconic Mass Effect characters to get an answer. Hop in the Mako as we crash headlong

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01:40:51

Hard Choices 4 - Game of Thrones

Hard Choices ·

2021/09/06

Winter is coming in this dragon-sized episode of Hard Choices, Miles Schneiderman and MeganBob are joined by special guests from The Unspoiled Podcast network, Natasha Winters and Krista Contino-Saumby. Together, they travel the roads of Westeros ranking the fuckability of 21 representative characters from the world of A Song of Ice and Fire and Game of Thrones. How dangerous is getting into bed with Cersei Lannister? What exactly does Jon Snow know nothing about? Will Tormund Giantsbane rock your

en

01:30:21

Hard Choices 3 - Marvel Cinematic Universe

Hard Choices ·

2021/07/01

Boners assemble! It's time to rank the fuckability of the Marvel Cinematic Universe and the team of Claire, Kit, and Dan Mulkerin, along with MeganBob, are ready to romance one of the most expansive franchises in modern history. In their quest to find the median of fuckability, you'll learn more about robot sex than you ever thought you'd need to know, more about our hosts than ever before, and perhaps an answer to the question of just how exactly does the Hulk smash. So, grab your best spandex

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01:27:27

Hard Choices 2 - 90's Star Trek

Hard Choices ·

2021/06/04

The second installment of Hard Choices is on the viewscreen and it’s a doozy. Join Miles Schneiderman and Ensign MeganBob, along with special guests Sharon Schneiderman and Kris Newton, as they beam aboard the USS Horny to bone where no podcast has dared to bone before. The show sets a course to discover the median of fuckability in the 90s Star Trek universe and learns a lot about our crew members along the way. So, put on your best jumpsuit and head to the holodeck for some quality hot takes on

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01:23:11

Hard Choices 1 - Lord of the Rings

Hard Choices ·

2021/04/01

Welcome to Hard Choices, a podcast appearing approximately whenever the mood strikes and guaranteed to explore new vistas of horniness! In this episode, Miles Schneiderman, Kit MeganBob, and special guest Katrina Ehrnman-Newton rank the fuckability of 21 notable Lord of the Rings characters in an attempt to uncover who is the median most fuckable character in the LOTR universe. Turn down the torchlight, stuff your pipe with the finest weed in the Southfarthing, and get ready for some big feelings

en

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