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PODCAST

Wonderland Unlocked

Courtney Hays | Mental Health Advocate and Registerd Behavioral Technician

Welcome to Wonderland Unlocked! I"m Courtney, your Peer Support Specialist, excited to guide you through a journey inspired by Alice in Wonderland. We"ll explore mental health, personal growth, and self-discovery through enchanting tales, offering insights on identity and emotional resilience. Whether you seek inspiration or feel lost, this space is for you to embrace the adventure and uncover the magic. So, grab your favorite tea or coffee, and let’s unlock the wisdom of Wonderland

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All Episodes

00:15:49

E140: The Stubborn Queen

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/07/20

Series 9: The Wall and the Wonderland: When They Don’t Want to Meet You ThereEpisode 140: The Stubborn QueenShe rules with rigidity. Her way or no way. The rules are ever-changing—but only she gets to break them. In this episode, we explore the impact of controlling, inflexible people—those who dig in their heels while demanding everyone else dance around them.Whether it’s a parent, partner, boss, or friend, the Stubborn Queen shows up in real life too: shouting orders, rewriting truth, and

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00:14:39

E139: You’ve Changed (And They Say It Like It’s a Bad...

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/07/19

Series 9: The Wall and the Wonderland: When They Don’t Want to Meet You ThereEpisode 139: You’ve Changed (And They Say It Like It’s a Bad Thing)They say it with a sneer. A sigh. A shake of the head."You’ve changed."As if growth is betrayal. As if becoming more yourself is a problem.In this episode, we untangle the discomfort others feel when you evolve—when you stop shrinking, start healing, or simply choose different paths. Maybe you left the script. Maybe you outgrew the room. Maybe Wonderland

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00:11:33

E138 - The Tea Party That Never Starts

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/07/18

Series 9: The Wall and the Wonderland: When They Don’t Want to Meet You ThereEpisode 138: The Tea Party That Never StartsYou’ve set the table. You’ve waited. You’ve hoped. But somehow, the moment never comes. In this episode, we sit with the ache of one-sided effort—the kind where you plan the gathering, hold space for connection, and still find yourself sitting alone at an empty table.What happens when the people you long to connect with never show up—not physically, not emotionally, not fully?In

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00:14:00

E137 - The Wall Between Us

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/07/17

Series 9: The Wall and the Wonderland: When They Don’t Want to Meet You ThereEpisode 137: The Wall Between UsYou reach out—but all you meet is stone. In this episode, we explore the silent, invisible, and stubborn barriers that show up in relationships: the unspoken tension, the history no one wants to unpack, the feeling of being shut out no matter how loudly your heart knocks. Whether it’s family, friends, or someone you used to trust, what do we do when connection feels blocked—but we can still

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00:24:42

E136 - Chapter 5: Reclaiming Her Identity

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/07/14

Episode Title: Chapter 5: Reclaiming Her IdentitySeries 8 – Courtney’s Crooked CrownShe returns—not as the girl they tried to mold, but as the woman they never saw coming. In this powerful chapter, I step back into the very kingdom that once questioned my worth and reclaim my identity on my own terms. No longer the outcast, no longer the scapegoat—I come back with wisdom, clarity, and emotional mastery that even the king can’t ignore.This episode is about rising from exile and showing the world—and

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00:20:37

E135: Chapter 4: Bending Time and Space

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/28

Episode 135: Chapter 4: Bending Time and SpaceSeries 8 – Courtney’s Crooked CrownIn Wonderland, time doesn’t tick—it twists. In this chapter, we explore the warped reality of trauma time: when past pain feels present, when one word can send you spiraling years back, and when healing never follows a straight line. Emotional flashbacks, time blindness, and the disorienting loops of a dysregulated nervous system all come to the table.I share how time bends when you live with BPD and neurodivergence—how

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00:35:18

E134: Chapter 3: Whispers of the Ancient Trees

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/27

Episode 134: Chapter 3: Whispers of the Ancient TreesSeries 8 – Courtney’s Crooked CrownDeep in the woods of Wonderland, the noise fades—and the whispers begin. In this episode, we pause in the stillness of the ancient trees, where memory clings like moss and the past is never truly silent. Here, I reflect on inherited pain, the echoes of childhood, and the quiet truths that shaped who I’ve become. The forest doesn't yell—it reminds. Of everything you tried to forget. Of everything you still

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00:24:37

E133: Chapter 2: The Chaotic Tea Party

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/26

Episode 133: Chapter 2: The Chaotic Tea PartySeries 8 – Courtney’s Crooked CrownPull up a chair—but don’t expect order. In this chapter, we enter the chaos of the tea party: a place where logic unravels, emotions spill, and nothing stays in its cup. This episode explores what it feels like to navigate relationships that swing wildly—where one moment you’re the guest of honor, and the next, you’re not even invited.It’s a reflection of life with emotional dysregulation, neurodivergence, and the

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00:34:55

E132: Chapter 1: The Fall into Wonderland

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/24

Episode 132: Chapter 1: The Fall into WonderlandSeries 8 – Courtney’s Crooked CrownThe fall wasn’t graceful—and neither was the life that led up to it.In this opening chapter of Courtney’s Crooked Crown, we tumble headfirst into Wonderland, not with whimsy, but with the weight of reality: abandonment wounds, identity crises, and the sting of never quite being “enough.” This isn’t Alice’s fairytale descent—this is mine. With a crooked crown slipping sideways and old scars bleeding into new

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00:15:36

E131 – To My Hope, the White Rabbit’s Relentless Chase

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/16

Series 7: Unlocked Letters – A Journey Through Hurt and HopeEpisode 131 – To My Hope, the White Rabbit’s Relentless ChaseIn this episode, we write a letter to something fragile but fierce—hope. The kind that looks like the White Rabbit: always running, always just out of reach, but never fully gone. To My Hope, the White Rabbit’s Relentless Chase is about those moments when you almost give up, but something—some small spark—keeps you chasing the life you haven’t lived yet.It’s a love letter to the

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00:18:22

E130 – The Mad Hatter’s Tea Party: When Chaos Meets...

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/15

Series 7: Unlocked Letters – A Journey Through Hurt and Hope Episode 130 – The Mad Hatter’s Tea Party: When Chaos Meets CreativityIn this episode, we pull up a mismatched chair at the Mad Hatter’s table and pour a cup of truth. The Mad Hatter’s Tea Party: When Chaos Meets Creativity explores what it means to grow up feeling “too much”—too emotional, too unpredictable, too chaotic—and how that same energy can become the source of our greatest magic.This is a letter to the misunderstood parts of

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00:11:34

E129 – To the Dormouse Who Slept Through My Pain

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/14

Series 7: Unlocked Letters – A Journey Through Hurt and Hope Episode 129 – To the Dormouse Who Slept Through My PainIn this episode, we open a letter sealed in silence—written to the one who napped through the noise of our heartbreak. To the Dormouse Who Slept Through My Pain is a raw, reflective message to the people who looked the other way when they should’ve looked closer. When pain filled the room, they stayed asleep. When you reached out, they curled deeper into comfort.This is a letter for

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00:10:19

E128: To Alice: I Wish I Was You

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/13

Series 7: Unlocked Letters: A Journey Through Hurt and HopeEpisode 128: To Alice: I Wish I Was YouIn this deeply personal episode, I write a letter to Alice—a figure of curiosity, adventure, and endless possibility. Alice's journey through Wonderland is one of self-discovery, embracing the unknown, and navigating the chaos with courage and wonder. For years, I envied her freedom to explore, to question, and to reinvent herself, while I felt trapped by my own inner turmoil, limitations, and

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00:13:21

E 127: To the Mirror I Feared: A Letter to My Own...

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/13

Series 7: Unlocked Letters: A Journey Through Hurt and HopeEpisode 127: To the Mirror I Feared: A Letter to My Own ReflectionIn this heartfelt episode, I write a letter to the reflection I spent years avoiding—the person staring back at me in the mirror. For so long, my own image was a source of discomfort, a reminder of all my flaws, insecurities, and the parts of myself I couldn’t accept. Through the lens of Alice in Wonderland, I confront the fractured sense of self I’ve carried with me, shaped

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00:12:50

E 126: Dear Red Queen: I Learned Rage from You

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/11

Series 7: Unlocked Letters: A Journey Through Hurt and HopeEpisode 126: Dear Red Queen: I Learned Rage from YouIn this raw and powerful episode, I pen a letter to the "Red Queen" within—my inner embodiment of anger, fear, and frustration. Through the lens of Alice in Wonderland, I reflect on how this fierce, unpredictable force became ingrained in my emotional landscape. From childhood tantrums to the destructive cycle of self-loathing, the Red Queen’s reign is both a symbol and a symptom

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00:12:11

E125: The Hatter’s Diagnosis

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/10

Series 6: Not Quite Alice — The Wonderland of Being Given AwayE125: The Hatter’s Diagnosis“Mad, aren’t you?” In this episode of Wonderland Unlocked, we sit down with the Hatter — or rather, the long line of therapists, teachers, doctors, and well-meaning adults who tried to explain what was “wrong” with us.Being adopted often means being pathologized. Big emotions? Must be a disorder. Questions about identity? Probably defiance. In The Hatter’s Diagnosis, we untangle the confusion of growing up

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00:09:59

E124: The Queen’s Checklist — Good Adoptee Behavior

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/09

Series 6: Not Quite Alice — The Wonderland of Being Given AwayE124: The Queen’s Checklist — Good Adoptee BehaviorIn this episode, we step into the throne room of expectations — where adoptees are handed invisible scrolls of how to behave, how to feel, and who to be. “Be grateful,” “Don’t ask questions,” “Smile and stay small.” Sound familiar?Today on Wonderland Unlocked, we open up the Queen’s gilded checklist and take a closer look at the impossible standards many adoptees are expected to meet just

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00:10:09

E123: Paper Flowers, Paper Parents

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/08

Series 6: Not Quite Alice: The Wonderland of Being Given AwayE123: Paper Flowers, Paper ParentsSometimes the people meant to care for us feel fragile — like paper flowers that look beautiful but can’t stand the test of time or hardship.In this episode of Not Quite Alice: The Wonderland of Being Given Away, we explore the ache of having caregivers who seem loving on the surface but lack the depth, consistency, or support you needed to truly grow.We dive into:The experience of feeling seen but not

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00:12:34

E122: The Painted Roses of Perfection

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/07

Series 6: Not Quite Alice: The Wonderland of Being Given AwayE122: The Painted Roses of PerfectionWhat happens when you’re expected to be flawless — to fit perfectly into a story that isn’t your own?In this episode of Not Quite Alice: The Wonderland of Being Given Away, we unravel the pressure of painting over your true self to meet impossible standards. Like the Painted Roses in Wonderland, you might feel forced to cover your real colors just to avoid conflict or rejection.We explore:The exhausting

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00:12:51

E121: The Queen’s “Gift”

Wonderland Unlocked ·

2025/06/06

Series 6: Not Quite Alice: The Wonderland of Being Given AwayE121: The Queen’s “Gift”“You were chosen,” they say. But chosen by whom? And for what purpose?In this episode of Not Quite Alice: The Wonderland of Being Given Away, we dive deep into the weight of being labeled a “gift” — whether by birth family, foster system, or adoptive parents — and the expectations that come with it.We explore:What it really means to be “chosen” and the pressure that can followHow being a “gift” can feel more like a

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