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PODCAST

The Roast and Toast Podcast

Do you like watching bad movies? Do you like films with terrible tropes, awful scripts, and poor acting? So do we...more or less! Join in with hosts Jordan Geisler, John Shupe and Rhiane Steinhauer to roast and toast bad movies! Together they"ll pick out the lows (roasts) and highs (toasts) of awful films both current and old.

tv & film

All Episodes

01:03:08

S2E7: The Roast & Toast of "Marci X"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2021/05/18

If culture-appropriating movies are your thing, then it's time to watch the 2003 Lisa Kudrow movie "Marci X." Jordan, John, and Rhiane talk about the outstanding flaws in this poor excuse of a rom-com, including, but not limited to, massive moments of racism, Damon Wayans awful acting and voice, Lisa's jokes about her dad being Jewish, the hilarious song titles, all things Christine Baranski in her role as Senator Spinkle, the songs "Power in my Purse" and "In the Butt," and so much more. Later,

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01:03:18

S2E6: Roast & Toast of "Time Trap"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2021/05/04

Everyone loves a good time travel movie, especially when they don't make sense! John and Rhiane help explain the movie to Jordan's feeble mind, and they all point out the many flaws, such as the Furby's death, having two similar-looking blonde girls in the same movie, the search for hippies, mulitple entrances to the fountain of youth, murderous cavemen, and a heck of a ton more. Later, they do a segment of Tag It and All Sides.Please leave a rating and review on iTunes so other people know that

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01:20:50

S2E5: The Roast & Toast of "She-Devil"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2021/04/20

Behold, the most progressive revenge story ever told, and from 1989 of all years! Jordan, John, and Rhiane discuss their love for the Meryl Streep and Roseanne Barr film, including Roseanne's business abilities, Meryl Streep being a good mother but terrible person for being with a married man, Ed Begley Jr.'s booty shot, Roseanne's disgusting doughnut make-out scene, the death of Meryl's dog, an incredible green screen explosion, and so much more! Later they do a segment of All Sides. Please leave a

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01:11:48

S2E4: The Roast & Toast of "Bats"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2021/04/06

Everyone loves a good creature-feature, so we watched the 1999 horror movie "Bats"--only, it wasn't that good.Jordan, John, and Rhiane point out the several moments of poor dialogue, the thick and terribly fake bats, the resurgence of women wearing only tank tops, the lack of romance and whoopee-making between the leads and how that may be a good thing, bat poison that isn't poisonous, map-pointing skills, and a heck of a lot more. Later, they do a segment of Fact or Fiction in which John gets his

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01:08:27

S2E3: The Roast & Toast of "The Family"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2021/03/23

Are you ready for a family-centered flick focusing on the challenges of fitting in? Sorry, but "The Family" starring Robert DeNiro and Michelle Pfeiffer ain't it. Jordan, John, and Rhiane sit down to discuss this awful film and its many flaws, such as anything and everything involving the daughter Belle, Robert DeNiro's pent-up rage, the kid with a mole, the absolute insanity of a newspaper getting from Normandy to New Jersey, not getting any plot information, Michelle Pfeiffer blowing up a grocery

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01:19:19

S2E2: The Roast & Toast of "Teaching Mrs.Tingle"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2021/03/09

Who doesn't a good revenge movie? Not us! Especially when it's "Teaching Mrs.Tingle." Despite their love for Dame Helen Mirren, Jordan, John, and Rhiane discuss their absolute hatred for this moving while going on many tangents to avoid remembering the horror of this film.Together, they point out problems such as Katie Holmes' crazy make-whoopee scene, the lack of any real scares or thrills, the morality (or immorality) of the characters, Molly Ringwald's terrible acting, Vivica A. Fox's literal 20

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01:24:46

S2E1: The Roast & Toast of Tyler Perry's "The Single...

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2021/02/23

Welcome to season two! It's time for a mom's night out! But if you like bad movies, that will also justify watching this awful chick flick. Jordan, John, and Rhiane pick through the nitty gritty in this Tyler Perry film, including typical racial stereotypes, Amy Smart's abysmal acting (if you can call it that), Wendi McLendon-Covey's character's racism, Amy Smart's character's dialogue about erecting wood, the lack of people having jobs, the name TK and what it might stand for, and SO much more

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01:15:28

S1E21: The Roast & Toast of "Moose: The Movie"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2021/02/02

Who doesn't love a good creature-feature? Not this group of movie-watchers! Jordan, John, and Rhiane only like the bad ones, so they watched "Moose: The Movie," and they sure do have a lot to say about it. There's plenty to cover, such as the town's cannibalism problem, unibrowed puppeteers, no consideration for forensic evidence, Elmer Fudd lisps, unsafe puppets, mail-order bride jokes, and so much more. Later, they do a segment of All Sides and Fact or Fiction. Please leave a rating and review on

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01:22:10

S1E20: The Roast &Toast of "Love 'n' Dancing"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2021/01/10

Are you looking for a film that combines romance with the art of west coast swing? Then find some other movie, 'cause that's not what "Love 'n' Dancing" is about. Jordan, John, and Rhiane discuss the 2008 flop and it's many problems, including, but not limited to, Amy Smart's terrible acting, whether or not Tom Malloy's character is actually deaf, the insane dialogue, the inclusivity that's ultimately used to make fun of characters, the utter lack of romance, and so much more. Later, they do a

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01:19:54

S1E19: The Roast & Toast of "Unaccompanied Minors"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/12/22

Merry Christmas! In the second and final installment of the Christmas-themed episodes, the gang sits down to roast some chestnuts by the fire, as well as roast the 2006 Christmas film "Unaccompanied Minors." They point out problems such as Charlie's obsession with Santa despite being Jewish, Donna's past trauma and aversion to being touched by people, the wonder of the sledding scene, the character Beef as a whole, the movie's one funny line by Lewis Black, and the lack of care for any child in the

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01:07:29

S1E18: The Roast & Toast of "Christmas with the...

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/12/08

It's the holiday season, so of course it's time for some bad Christmas movies! We watched "Christmas with the Andersons," a movie that honestly doesn't really exist. The group goes into the many fatal flaws of the film, such as the war on poor people, Christy Carlson Romano's two facial expressions used in the movie, the lack of any plot, the mystery behind the disappearing country accents, whether or not the Andersons were ever that wealthy, the Russian interior decorator, and SO much more. Later

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01:06:56

S1E17: The Roast & Toast of "Fool's Gold"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/12/01

After having watched the worst excuse for a rom-com in the history of the podcast, Jordan, John, and Rhiane sit down to discuss the movie "Fool's Gold," marking Matthew McConaughey's second time on the podcast. Together they discuss problems such as the excessive reggae music, Donald Sutherland's terrible British accent, the lack of logic revolving around Kate Hudson remarrying Matthew, Alexis Dziana's atrocious performance, and so much more. Later they do a segment of Tag It and All Sides.

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01:33:49

S1E16: The Roast & Toast of "Batman and Robin"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/11/17

Looking for a superhero movie where the heroes have anatomically-correct rubber suits? Then you need to check out "Batman and Robin"! Jordan, John, and Rhiane discuss the infamous 1997 movie "Batman and Robin" which killed the original Batman movie series. Together they dig into the multiple Razzie noms the movie earned, Alicia Silverstone's reprisal of Cher from "Clueless" for this movie, Uma Thurman's yellow kitchen gloves and monkey suit, George Clooney's dull and absent performance as Batman,

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01:10:57

S1 E15 The Roast & Toast of "Mr.Wrong"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/11/03

Before she was a victim of cancel culture, Ellen DeGeneres starred in the black comedy "Mr.Wrong"! Jordan, John, and Rhiane sit down and discuss everything going on this film, like Ellen's bad acting, Bill Pullman's strange voice and terrible poetry, the lack of logic, so much whoopee-making, Joan Cusack's amazing performance as Inga, and Ellen's lack of initiative to fix her situation. Afterwards, they do a segment of Tag It and All Sides.Please leave a rating and review on iTunes so other people

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01:07:32

S1E14: The Roast & Toast of "Shut In"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/10/27

In the final edition of this spooky season's episodes, the gang roasts the 2016 thriller Shut In. Together they pick apart the many problems with the movie, such as what the heck is going on with Jacob Tremblay's character (is he mute? is he deaf? nobody can tell), Naomi Watts' weary look, Charlie Heaton's stellar performance as a total creep, eating soap, the likeliness of Charlie Heaton pulling of his catatonic state, and so much more. Plus, they do a doubled segment of All Sides. Please leave a

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01:34:27

S1E13: The Roast & Toast of "Birdemic: Shock and Terror"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/10/20

In the most roast-filled episode thus far, Jordan, John, and Rhiane sit down and roast the thing that is "Birdemic." Together, the group refuses to acknowledge "Birdemic as a movie, and they draw attention to the plethora of problems, including, but definitely not limited to, terrible sound quality, one-scratch kills, not getting bird attacks for the first 40 minutes, fake Yoko Ono, awful line deliveries, the boardroom clapping scene, Rod's $1 million sale, Nathalie's career at 1 Hour Photo,

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01:08:37

SE12: The Roast & Toast of "Hush"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/10/13

In another spooky edition of the podcast, the gang sits down to discuss the boring slow burn that is the 1998 movie "Hush." They discuss the several terrible aspects of the film, such as Gwyneth Paltrow's weave, the sexual mother-son relationship, Jessica Lange's insanity and perverted behavior, Gwyneth's crazy NY apartment, too many needles, and much more. Later, they do another double-sized segment of All Sides.Please leave a rating and review on iTunes so other people know that this podcast is

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01:29:30

S1 E11: The Roast & Toast of "Ma"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/10/06

In the first spooky-themed edition of the podcast, the gang discusses the incredible project that is the 2019 thriller "Ma." They get into Ma's lack of work ethic at her job, Juliette Lewis' training at the casino, Allison Janney's weave, Octavia Spencer's weave, and so much more. And, for extra spooks, they cover double the reviews in a segment of All Sides.Please leave a rating and review on iTunes so other people know that this podcast is worthy of a toast. Also, watch the 1998 movie "Hush"

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01:30:19

S1E10: The Roast & Toast of "Heartbreakers"

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/09/29

In the tenth episode, the gang roasts and toasts the film that inspired Jordan to start this podcast: "Heartbreakers"! Together, the group points out the several flaws of the film, such as Jennifer Love Hewitt's bad attitude, Sigourney Weaver telling Jennifer Love Hewitt to "feel her butt," an incredibly endowed statue, too many plots, whether or not con artists use the word "con," and John's fear of judging wedding dresses. Later, they do a segment of Faction or Fiction to figure out possible

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01:14:45

S1E9: Roast & Toast of "The House at the End of the...

The Roast and Toast Podcast ·

2020/09/15

Once upon a time, Jennifer Lawrence won an Oscar for "Silver Linings Playbook," but before that happened, she starred in the 2012 horror thriller "House at the End of the Street." The gang sits down to roast and toast the many flaws of this strange flick, including the tree that definitely doesn't have a face, crazy dialogue, how JLaw and her mom only wear tank tops, the confusing Carrie Ann/Ryan Jacobson timeline, wet kissing, and Carrie Ann's gutteral animal noises. Plus, they do a segment of

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