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PODCAST

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous

Ellecia Paine is a non-monogamy relationship coach who helps people navigate ENM (Enthusiastic non-monogamy), polyamory, open relating, swinging, kink, tantra and life in general. Listen in to the candid conversations that give you a peek into the inner lives of other non-monogamous folks. Hear how they"ve overcome challenges like jealousy, insecurity, and social scrutiny. And celebrate with them as they share all the reasons it"s worth it to have relationships that don"t fit in the box.

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

52:07

Unmasking Ashley Madison: Why People Cheat & What It...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/04/03

Send us a textWhen I was invited to interview someone from Ashley Madison, I hesitated. My first instinct was judgment — but then I realized, that’s the same kind of stigma people apply to non-monogamy all the time.This powerful conversation with Paul Keable, Chief Strategy Officer at Ashley Madison, dives deep into the complex, often misunderstood world of infidelity, emotional disconnection, and unmet needs in long-term relationships.🔍 This episode is NOT about promoting cheating — it’s about

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35:50

5 Simple Tools for Profound Intimacy in Non-Monogamy,...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/03/27

Send us a textStruggling to feel deeply connected in your non-monogamous relationships? Whether you're navigating polyamory, open relationships, or casual connections, meaningful intimacy doesn’t have to take hours of deep conversations or elaborate date nights. In fact, it can start with just five minutes a day.In this episode, I’m sharing five powerful yet simple practices from my Beyond Monogamy 4CNM Method that can help you build stronger, more intimate connections — no matter how complex

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53:16

Thriving in Non Monogamous Social Situations Without...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/03/20

Send us a textThe dinner party where your partner's other partner shows up. The wedding where you're trying to explain your relationship structure to curious relatives. The community gathering where you're juggling attention between multiple partners.Social events in non-monogamous relationships present unique challenges that most relationship advice completely ignores.In this raw and practical episode, I sit down with Danny to unpack exactly how to navigate these complex situations

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41:52

From Should to Could - Designing Your Non-monogamous...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/03/13

Send us a textHave you ever felt like you're living someone else's version of a "good" relationship? That moment when you realize you've been checking boxes you never actually chose for yourself? I've been there, and it's time we talk about moving from relationship "shoulds" to relationship "coulds."In this episode, I'm sharing my journey from living a picture-perfect life on the outside while hiding a painful reality behind closed doors

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21:18

The Hidden Price Tag of Figuring Out Non Monogamy Alone

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/03/06

Send us a textAre you trying to navigate ethical non-monogamy through trial and error? In this episode I reveal why the DIY approach to non-monogamy often leads to unexpected emotional and relationship costs.Episode Highlights: • Understanding the hidden costs of unsupported non-monogamy • Real stories from couples navigating ethical non-monogamy • Practical solutions for common non-monogamous relationship challenges • Expert strategies for building successful non-monogamous relationshipsThe Real

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50:49

Building Polyamorous Community and Connections with...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/02/27

Send us a text🎉100 episodes! Can you believe it? Three years ago, I was terrified to be on video, worried about getting it all "right." Now, this podcast has become a thriving space for deep, unfiltered conversations about non-monogamy—and it’s all thanks to you! 💜To celebrate this milestone, I’m joined by Aly Moon, a polyamory community leader with 15+ years of non-monogamous experience and 7 years of hosting events in the Pacific Northwest. Aly is all about creating intentional,

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14:00

The #1 Secret to Thriving in Open Relationships, Ep. 99

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/02/20

Send us a textFeeling lost in non-monogamy? Struggling with unclear boundaries? Without clarity, your relationships can feel uncertain and chaotic. In this episode, I break down why clarity is EVERYTHING when it comes to thriving in open relationships. 📌 In This Episode, You’ll Learn:✅ How to define your North Star for relationship clarity✅ The importance of non-negotiables & why they shape your boundaries✅ How to break free from harmful relationship patterns✅ Why shared goals are essential for

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47:49

The Anxious Person's Toolkit for Successful...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/02/13

Send us a textAre you navigating the emotional landscape of non-monogamy? In this episode, I chat with Lola Phoenix, author of "The Anxious Person's Guide to Non-Monogamy", "The Non-monogamy Journal", and host of the "Non-Monogamy Help" podcast. We chat about the complexities of open relationships and how to build a toolkit for managing the intense emotions that often arise.Key Insights:The importance of having a personal "anchor" in non-monogamous

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19:11

The Hidden Costs of Ignoring Jealousy in...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/02/06

Send us a textHave you ever tried to brush off jealousy, hoping it would simply fade away? In this eye-opening episode, I uncover the hidden costs of ignoring this powerful emotion in non-monogamous relationships.Uncover the truth about jealousy:Why avoiding jealousy actually intensifies its impactHow unaddressed jealousy erodes trust and emotional safetyPractical steps to prevent jealousy from damaging your connectionsWe'll uncover the subtle ways jealousy can take root, even when you think

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55:27

Reignite Your Dating Life: Overcoming App Burnout and...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/01/30

Send us a textAre you tired of swiping endlessly on dating apps, feeling like you're getting nowhere? In this episode, I sit down with Julie and Yue, the dynamic duo behind the Dateable podcast and authors of "How to Be Dateable: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Person and Falling in Love." These dating experts are here to shake up your approach to modern romance, whether you're monogamous, non-monogamous, or somewhere in between.We dive deep into why non-monogamous dating

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11:17

Why DIY Jealousy Solutions Fall Short in Non Monogamy

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/01/23

Send us a textHave you ever found yourself caught in the grip of jealousy, promising that next time will be different, only to find those familiar feelings resurface? If you've been trying to tackle jealousy on your own without success, you're not alone. In this episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on why DIY approaches to managing jealousy often fall short, and why deeper work is crucial for lasting change.I'll explore the hidden complexities of jealousy, moving beyond

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48:54

The Unexpected Paths of Non-Monogamy: A Conversation...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/01/16

Send us a textAre you ready to challenge everything you thought you knew about relationships? In this eye-opening episode, I sit down with Annie Undone, a writer, artist, and relationship anarchist who's been through it all - from monogamy to swinging, polyamory, and now relationship anarchy. Together, we unpack the raw truth about opening up relationships and why it might just lead to the end of your current partnership... but that's not necessarily a bad thing.The Uncomfortable Truth

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36:39

How to Turn Jealousy Into a Tool for Growth, Ep. 93

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/01/09

Send us a textHave you ever felt that knot in your stomach when your partner laughs a little too hard with someone new? Or that tightness in your chest when they're excited about a fresh connection? Jealousy can be an unwelcome guest in our emotional landscape, especially in non-monogamous relationships. But what if I told you that this intense feeling isn't your enemy, but potentially one of your most powerful allies?In this episode, I'm sharing a perspective that completely changed

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13:51

Why 2025 is the Year to Let Go of Jealousy, Ep. 92

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2025/01/02

Send us a textAre you tired of jealousy hijacking your relationships? Imagine stepping into 2025 with the power to transform those uncomfortable feelings into opportunities for growth and deeper connection. In this episode, I'm sharing three powerful tools to help you navigate jealousy in non-monogamous relationships with confidence and grace.What You'll Discover:How to identify jealousy in your body before it spirals in your mindThe art of uncovering hidden triggers that fuel jealous

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54:35

Polyamory Explored: Jealousy, Communication and...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2024/12/26

Send us a textAre you grappling with jealousy in your non-monogamous relationships? Curious about the differences between solo polyamory and relationship anarchy? In this eye-opening episode, I'm joined by the legendary Kathy Labriola, a counselor, nurse, and author with decades of experience guiding polyamorous and non-monogamous folks.Mastering JealousyUnderstanding why jealousy arises and how it differs from envy or covetingPractical strategies for addressing the root causes of jealousySolo

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28:30

Graceful Rejection: The Art of Saying No Without...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2024/12/12

Send us a textHow do you turn someone down romantically without creating awkwardness or burning bridges? In this episode, my partner, Danny, and I tackle one of the trickiest aspects of non-monogamous relationships: rejection. Inspired by a question from one of our Patreon supporters, we explore how to say "no" in a way that’s respectful, kind, and true to your own boundaries.Key Topics We Cover:Why Over-Explaining Hurts More Than It Helps: Learn how to set boundaries without feeling the

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29:44

Beyond Swiping Finding Authentic Connections in Seattle

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2024/11/28

Send us a textAre You Ready to Rethink How You Date?Tired of endlessly swiping on dating apps and feeling like you're spinning your wheels? In this episode, I sit down with Rozie Erlewine, a compassionate matchmaker and polyamorous community organizer who’s been helping people connect in the Seattle polyamory scene since 2017. Rozie, the founder of Seattle Inclusive Matchmaking and host of polyamorous speed dating events, brings fresh ideas to creating real, intentional connections outside the

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62:56

Catapults and Consent: When Kink and Polyamory...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2024/11/14

Send us a text Are you ready to get an in-depth look into navigating kink and non-monogamy together? This episode is your ultimate guide to understanding the fascinating intersection of kink, polyamory, and non-monogamous relationships. I’m sitting down with Still, a veteran kink community organizer and co-host of Tasty!—South Seattle's monitored monthly kink night at The Lumber Yard Bar. Together, we unpack what it really takes to create safe, trusting, and authentic experiences in these

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53:18

Boundaries, Bedrooms, and Beyond, Navigating Non...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2024/10/31

Send us a textCurious about what it really takes to date in the non-monogamous world? In this episode, I’m joined by Shannon Whaley, an anti-hustle business coach and newly-out polyamorous explorer, as we dive into the challenges and breakthroughs of non-monogamous dating. Together, we break down the nuances of setting clear boundaries, asking the tough but essential questions, and finding self-worth after surviving toxic relationships.Shannon opens up about her journey and how embracing both

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63:18

Beyond Vanilla The Intersection of Polyamory and Kink...

Nope! We"re Not Monogamous ·

2024/10/17

Send us a textEver wondered what happens when kink and non-monogamy collide with trauma healing? In this episode, I sit down with the incredible Maeve McBride, a kink and ENM educator, erotic coach, and the Executive Director of Kinkfest 2025, to talk about how these worlds intersect—and it’s not just about the fun stuff (though there’s plenty of that too).Maeve takes us on a journey, from supporting polyamorous families through childbirth to becoming a powerhouse in the kink community. We dig into

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146 results

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