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PODCAST

Feminist Wellness

Béa Victoria Albina

You weren"t born anxious, depleted, and second-guessing yourself. You were taught to be. The Feminist Wellness podcast is where nervous system science meets the truth nobody wants to say out loud: most of what you think is "self-care" is just performing wellness while your body stays stuck in survival mode. Host Béa Victoria Albina - NP, life coach, and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner - breaks down the codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing habits that keep you trapped in what she calls

health & fitness alternative health

All Episodes

44:46

Sneak Peek: Chapter One of End Emotional Outsourcing...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/09/21

My love, I have something really special for you today: I’m sharing Chapter One of my upcoming book, End Emotional Outsourcing: How to Overcome Your Codependent, Perfectionist, and People-Pleasing Habits. This chapter unpacks what emotional outsourcing really is, how it sneaks into our lives, and why it’s not your fault you’ve been carrying these patterns. You’ll hear stories from my clients, my own journey, and the cultural forces that keep us stuck in self-abandonment... plus the first steps

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16:35

Ep #344: The Resentment Equation: A Deep Dive Into...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/09/18

Do you ever wonder why you sometimes feel an inexplicable rage towards the people you love most?If you've ever agreed to take on more work when you're already drowning, pushed through exhaustion to help others, ignored your own needs to keep the peace, or found yourself inexplicably angry about small things, this episode is for you.Join me this week as I teach you the mathematical formula for resentment. You’ll learn the science behind why saying "yes" when you mean "no" creates emotional labor

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09:46

You Don't Have to Earn Your Worth Anymore: The Book...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/09/16

Do you find yourself constantly dispensing kindness and helpfulness in exchange for validation and approval?This "good girl chokehold" is a survival strategy that rewires the brain, making you a professional people pleaser and preventing true intimacy. It's like being trapped in the world's most exhausting improv show where the only rule is "yes, and," except you never get to be anything but the supporting character in everyone else's story.In End Emotional Outsourcing, you'll learn how to break

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18:59

Ep #343: Pet Names That Trigger

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/09/11

#343: I receive beautiful messages from listeners telling me that being called "my angel" or "mi amor" transformed their entire week, maybe even the whole way they relate to themselves. Yet others write to express their discomfort. The language feels too familiar, unprofessional, even anti-feminist. This divide illuminates a crucial truth about healing: when genuine tenderness makes your skin crawl, your nervous system is telling you something important.Tune in this week to discover the neuroscience

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10:27

The 2AM Mental Hamster Wheel: The Book Series #6

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/09/09

You're lying in bed at 2 a.m., replaying that conversation from earlier where your joke fell flat or someone looked uncomfortable after you shared a story. Your brain grabs onto that moment like a dog with a bone, analyzing every word, every facial expression, every micro reaction like you're CSI social interaction. The mental hamster wheel spins: Did I say something wrong? Are they mad at me? Do they think I'm weird now?This is exactly the exhausting cycle I help you break in End Emotional

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21:01

Ep #342: Why I Don’t Use the Term “Codependency"

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/09/04

#342: The word "codependent" is everywhere - on book covers (even mine), in therapy sessions, in conversations about relationships. But there's something fundamentally wrong with how we use this label.If you recognize yourself in patterns of people-pleasing, emotional caretaking, or losing yourself in other people's chaos, I want you to know something important: You're not broken. You're not diseased. And you're definitely not codependent. What you are is brilliantly adaptive.Join me this week as I

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00:41

Don't Miss Out: Get 25% Off Your Emotional...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/09/03

Pre-order your copy of Emotional Outsourcing from Barnes & Noble between September 3rd and September 5th, and you'll get 25% off! Just use the code PREORDER25 at checkout. This special online-only offer is the perfect opportunity to snag the book at a great price before it’s officially released.Even better, if you're a Barnes & Noble Premium Member, you'll receive an additional 10% discount automatically applied at checkout, making this an amazing deal you don't want to miss. Secure your

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09:21

Did I Make It All Up or Am I Actually Hurt?: The Book...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/09/02

You can spot when someone's being lousy to other people from 3 miles away. You're like an emotional bloodhound who knows when your friend is lying, when your coworker is stressed, when your mom is about to lose it. But when someone hurts you, you suddenly need a jury of 12 of your peers to confirm that what just happened was actually messed up and maybe it's okay for you to be hurt.This habit of emotional outsourcing at its most painful means you're literally giving away your right to trust your own

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32:42

Ep #341: Your Brilliant Nervous System: Countdown to...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/08/28

#341: If you've ever found yourself constantly scanning other people's faces for approval, shapeshifting to keep the peace, or feeling completely disconnected from what you actually want, this episode is for you. You might call this people-pleasing or being too sensitive, but something much more profound is going on here: you’re living with emotional outsourcing.Tune in this week as I explain how emotional outsourcing gets stored in your body as a procedural memory - not just a thought you can talk

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12:58

You're Not Loving Them, You're Managing Them: The...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/08/26

Your value isn't in your productivity. That uncomfortable feeling when you stop moving, stop doing, stop managing everyone else's life? That's not laziness talking. It's the voice of a nervous system that learned early on that being needed equals being safe. Your actual people want you to rest. They want you to have needs, wants, preferences. They want to take care of you sometimes too. And all of this is exactly what I break down in my new book, End Emotional Outsourcing.Pre-order the book now at

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43:55

Ep #340: Recognizing Functional Freeze: Countdown to...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/08/21

#340: Have you ever caught yourself saying, “I'm fine,’’ when you're actually anything but fine? Maybe you're getting everything done - crushing it at work, maintaining relationships, keeping up appearances - but feeling disconnected from it all. Like you're watching your life play out from behind a glass wall.This isn't just you being "too in your head" or "not trying hard enough to feel." This is your nervous system's brilliant (but outdated) protection mechanism called functional freeze. Join me

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10:02

You're Not Too Much. You're Not Not Enough.: The Book...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/08/19

This bonus episode explores how childhood messages about being "too much" create lifelong patterns of self-shrinking that affect every area of your life. When you spend years making yourself smaller to fit other people's comfort levels, you lose track of where you end and their expectations begin.But what if I told you that's a lie? What if I told you that the right people are starving for your realness? What if I told you that your "too much" is actually someone else's "just right?" What if you're

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27:33

Ep #339: Stop Hating Who You Used to Be: Countdown to...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/08/14

#339: You were doing the best you could with what you knew at the time. That's the truth that so many of us struggle to accept when we look back at our past decisions - the relationships we stayed in too long, the boundaries we didn't set, the times we said yes when we meant no.There's this part of us that believes if we're mean enough to ourselves about these choices, we won't make them again. But here's what science tells us: beating yourself up doesn't create change. This episode explores why

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05:13

You Can Stop Performing. Really.: The Book Series #2

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/08/12

There's this bone-deep fatigue that seeps into you when you've been performing yourself for everyone else instead of living your life for you. It's different from being tired after a busy day. It's the exhaustion that comes from constantly calculating what version of yourself the room needs. Meanwhile, real love doesn't require a costume. No tap dancing required for real, true, authentic, grounded, open-hearted love, love, love.That's what my book, End Emotional Outsourcing, is all about: helping

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24:58

Ep #338: Is Shame Running Your Life?: Countdown to...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/08/07

#338: Shame is one of the most powerful forces keeping us stuck in emotional outsourcing, and we don’t talk about it nearly enough. This invisible force runs so deep that we often don't even realize it's guiding our thoughts, feelings, and actions.My book, End Emotional Outsourcing was born from my search for a shame-free, inclusive, feminist framework to name these patterns, and to begin healing them. If you’ve ever felt like your habits made you broken or unworthy, this conversation is for

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07:36

You Were Never Meant to Live for Everyone Else: The...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/08/05

Ever have that moment where you realize you've been living your entire life for everyone else? You’re not alone, and you’re not broken. You’ve just been emotionally outsourcing.In this book series bonus, I name the pattern, share why it develops, and explain how it shapes everything from your relationships to your sense of self. And I’ll tell you how my new book, End Emotional Outsourcing, can help you start coming home to yourself - no longer orbiting everyone else’s needs, but finally living for

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00:43

It’s My Birthday, but the Presents Are for You 🎁

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/08/04

It's my birthday month, and I'm doing what any Leo Somatics nerd with a microphone and a brand new book would do. I'm giving you the gifts. If you pre-order End Emotional Outsourcing by August 18th, 2025, you're automatically entered to win a 30-minute, one-on-one coaching session with moi, not publicly available. Bring your most tangled thought habits, your most scrunched up somatics. Or, a 90-minute breathwork session to help you feel like yourself again, in your body and your spirit, not just

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37:38

Ep #337: Money is Emotional: The Link Between...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/07/31

#337: Money shapes more than just our bank accounts - it touches how we show up in relationships, how we value ourselves, and whether we feel secure enough to set boundaries with those who support us financially.This week, I sit down with financial therapist and author of Feel-Good Finance: Untangle Your Relationship with Money for Better Mental, Emotional, and Financial Well-Being, Aja Evans, to explore the intersection of money and mental health, particularly how codependent, perfectionist, and

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02:57

My book, End Emotional Outsourcing, is available for...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/07/29

For years, we've been gathering here on Feminist Wellness, unpacking the tangled thought habits that come from living through the lens of codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing conditioning. You've shared your stories, your wins, your heartbreaks, and your breakthroughs with me, and I have held each and every one close to my heart. Well, all of those conversations, all that healing, all that nerdy science, it's come together in my new book, End Emotional Outsourcing: How to Overcome Your

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42:10

Ep #336: Why We're Lonely: Unpacking Modern...

Feminist Wellness ·

2025/07/24

#336: Modern friendship isn't what it used to be. We're navigating a world where identity is more complex, where we have unlimited choice in who we befriend, and where the burden of maintaining connections falls entirely on our individual shoulders.Friendship expert, speaker, journalist, and author of Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections, Anna Goldfarb, also known as "The Friendship Explainer," reveals that this shift has created both unprecedented freedom and unexpected

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