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32:01

Prelude to Mercenaries

2015/01/30

This week we are turning to Netflix for the Christopher Olen Ray action lady team-up Mercenaries (Netflix Link), starring Cynthia Rothrock, Zoe Bell, Kristanna Loken, Vivica A. Fox, Bridgitte Nielsen and Nicole Bilderback. It's an Asylum film so we are a little nervous about it... Netflix Do's and Don'ts The Enemy Hitman's Run Absolute Zero Whatcho Talkin' Bout, Willis? Must haves for a movie mercenary

1:01:58

Gymnastics can't defeat a monster shrouded in farts -...

2015/01/27

Christopher Lambert (the T is silent apparently) dons the role of Beowulf and defends an outpost from Grendel, one of the "damned" who is a monster surrounded by a fart cloud, and his super horny mother. To defeat this evil duo, Beowulf must use his endless array of MI6-like weapon/gadgets and a series of flips and hand-springs. How many denizens of the outpost will survive before Beowulf gets the job done (spoiler alert - just 1)? We loved Beowulf. It is soooo dumb in the good way. The movie keeps

34:54

Prelude to Beowulf

2015/01/23

This week we prepare ourselves for the 1999 version of the classic poem with Christopher Lambert as the title character. Things to watch out for: How many back flips over the camera, how many times Lambert can't see anything, and how many times he cares too much. The movie is currently on Netflix so check it out and come back when we review the movie in full. Netflix Do's and Don'ts Beowulf (2007) Iron Sky Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (Part IV) Evolver Real Important Question What

1:05:34

One Crazy Mullet VS Not Chuck Norris VS Everyone Else...

2015/01/20

Godfrey Ho or one of his 1000 other aliases, directs this stunning look into one man's child neglect issues and the subsequent internal conflicts that come about....mainly crazy mullet painting, eyeball collecting, insane kung fu fights and taking your shirt off. Individual Ratings: Over the top action:Cheesy effects:Horrendous acting:Laugh-out-loud-ability:Ridiculous stunts:Gratuitous nudity:Memorable one-liners: Overall Ratings: Good Movie Quality: Bad Movie Quality:

37:42

Prelude to Undefeatable

2015/01/17

Brought to you by Scripts R' Us - the only spot to get a movie script when you have absolutely no writing talent. This episode, we prepare for what has been heralded as the most awesome thing ever, the Godfrey Ho YouTube sensation that is Undefeatable. From what we know there is lots of bad kung fu, some ridiculous stunts, an epic mullet, and the "best fight scene of all time", according to many movie reviewers. We have high hopes that this will be a new entry in the Bad Movie Hall of

53:03

2014 SMABFAs (Stinker Madness 2014 Movie Awards)

2015/01/10

The votes have been tallied and the envelopes have been sealed. The competition will be fierce. Who will win for the Stinker Madness Achievements in Bad Film-Making Awards for 2014? The Categories are: Best Bad Picture Best Bad Actor Best Bad Actress Worst Bad Picture MST3K Most Riffable Award The leaders in nominations: Noah - 6 nominations A Winter's Tale - 5 nominations Sabotage - 5 nominations Left Behind - 5 nominations Godzilla - 4 nominations Expendables 3 - 3

1:00:11

Tumbling and bugs in your hair will make you a star -...

2015/01/06

Sarah Jessica Parker and Helen Hunt remind us why the 80's should stay dead in this zaniest, craziest, wildest, freshest, bubblegum romp. Sarah Jessica Parker plays Laney, a girl who just wants to dance, and Helen Hunt plays Lynne who just wants to put weird stuff in her hair (lobsters, grasshoppers, dinosaurs, etc...). But the pair are thwarted by the reality of life and the harshness of societal norms (like jobs and school). The movie is the 80's in a can of pepper spray applied directly to the

33:38

Prelude to Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

2015/01/03

Presented by "Boys Just Want To Do Nothing". Girls can keep their fun. We prepare for the 80's in a nutshell with Helen Hunt and Sarah Jessica Parker as they dance their way to fame and fashion. Dance TV will never be the same. Streaming Do's and Don'ts Curse of the Dragon Slayer Dragonfyre Dawn of the Dragon Slayer The Crown and the Dragon: The Paladin Cycle The 2014 SMABFA Award Nominations! Best Bad Picture Best Bad Actor Best Bad Actress Worst Bad Picture MST3K Achievement for

1:02:38

Men in sewers with axes need to get more organized -...

2014/12/29

Stallone makes his 4th appearance on our show as he teams up with Golan and Globus (who make their third appearance) for the "one tough cop" showcase that is Cobra. Marion Cobretti has to protect a key witness that can identify the Nightslasher, who isn't just a raving murderer as his name would suggest; he's also the head of a criminal organization that wants to take over the world. How about that? We all quite like Cobra and would give it a recommendation. If you enjoy any type of action films

36:55

Prelude to Cobra

2014/12/27

Presented by Cobra, Cobra, Cobra, because one Cobra isn't enough. Its time for us to give ol' Sly Stallone another go (for the fourth time) as he teams up with Golan and Globus for Cobra. One tough cop must teach some bad guys a lesson...or something. Streaming Do's and Don'ts Overkill The Burbs Killing Season Legendary Jackie's Rant Hollywood Trickery or going to a movie and you are lied to about it.

1:12:06

Zero Ratings Need to Be Allowed on IMDB - The Star...

2014/12/16

Prepare to have your childhood dreams shattered! There's a reason the Star Wars Holiday Special has been buried and left to bootlegs as the only avenue to its viewing. It's terrible. Birdemic is a better film. We kid you not. The entire "concept" (I can't call it a story) is that Life Day is being celebrated on Kashyyk, the Wookie homeworld and Chewbacca is trying to get back to his family to spend the day with them. But that pesky Empire won't go away (even though their Death Star just go sploded)

35:19

Prelude to Star Wars Holiday Special

2014/12/13

Watch the Original CBS Bumper and Intro! Brought to you by the Star Wars Prequels Awesome Editions - the way we would have made them (hint = more Splosions!) Justin's Christmas wish is about to come true as we all prepare to view a film so notorious even the filmmakers tried to block everyone from every viewing it. With every single major cast member from Star Wars Episode IV plus singing and dancing (is that Bea Arthur and Heady Lamar? (That's HEADLY!)) this has got to be the greatest

50:09

He-Man and She-Ra: A Christmas Special

2014/12/08

Two Earth children get swept away to the magical Christmas planet of Eternia, where no one knows what they are talking about, get kidnapped, get kidnapped by someone else, get imprisoned, get kidnapped again by someone else, crash land in a space ship, almost freeze to death, almost get eaten by a snow beast, and get sucked up by a tractor beam for kidnapping purposes. Along the way they teach the entire Eternia gang (including Skeletor) about Christmas. Skeletor learns that it's ok to be nice to

34:20

Prelude to He-Man and She-Ra Christmas Special

2014/12/05

Week 2 of the #15BadXmasMovies pod/vidcrawl gets going as we pull our sword out, get "The Power" and attempt to enjoy the holidays with He-Man and She-Ra. Remember them from Episode 1?! Well they are back and Skeletor has an itchin' for some sweet Christmas loot...in the form of two Earth children who get teleported to Eternia. Hiyo Silver! I mean, I HAVE THE POWER! Also be sure to check out our 2014 Holiday Buying Guide for Bad Movie Lovers. 11 Great Xmas ideas for the movie lover in your

1:03:50

A child murders 4 adults and laughs about it - Home...

2014/12/01

We kick off the 15 Days of Bad Xmas Movies pod/vidcrawl with the non-Culkin theatrical Home Alone. This time its not even a Christmas movie (or is it?). A kid kinda gets left at Home Alone (he's got the chicken pox) and unintentionally inherits a chip that can render missiles invisible to radar. Four super espionage thugs seek to get the chip back and "hilarity" ensues when Alex Pruitt (the kid) sets them on a path to pain via Rube-Goldberg devices. So this movie strangely takes place beginning on

31:46

Prelude to Home Alone 3

2014/11/28

We start off the 15 Days of Bad Xmas Movies with the last of the theatrical Home Alones. Jackie gives us her rant about movie births and why they suck. Streaming Dos and Don'ts Snowpiercer DeepStar Six Hard Rain Lawless Follow the 15 Days of Bad Xmas Movies Misan[trope]y – misantropey.com Releasing December 5th – Santa Claus Conquers the Martians Dark Corners - www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL6EF2D18AD0AB7504 Releasing December 9nd – Elves If We Made It –

1:08:16

The Feel Good Comedy Hit of the Year - The Wicker Man

2014/11/25

Nic Cage delivers one of the finest bad performances of all time in a movie whose plot isn't even a thing (bee crops?) all for the sake of the dumbest evil plan of all time. The Wicker Man serves as a shining example of why we do what we do, to find these movies that are so over the top awesome that you can't help but love them despite how terrible they are. Nic Cage plays a California highway patrol man/super detective who gets imformed that his ex-fiancee's daughter is missing and that he must

34:08

Prelude to The Wicker Man

2014/11/22

We get set for Academy Award winning Nic Cage to make his second appearance on the show in the 2006 thriller "The Wicker Man". And this show is all about Mr. Ex Coppola with the commercial and improv featuring guest appearance from the Ghost Rider himself. It is also HIGHLY recommended to check out the 3 Minute Wicker Man video if you haven't seen this movie or don't have access to the whole film. Three Minute Wicker Man Streaming Do's and Don'ts: The Explorers Endangered Species 3 Days to

1:00:38

Watch a man commit career suicide - The Love Guru

2014/11/17

This movie is like a slow painful death from baby-piranha bites. Mike Myers puts his career in a noose, takes its pants off and then kicks out the chair. Rubbish. Pure rubbish with no enjoyment value at all. Its so bad and unviewable that you would be better suited spending your time taking a tack hammer to your temples. Avoid this film at all costs. Even the appearances by every human ever in this film can't save it. I hate it! $*#& *#@$! AAAAARGGGGHHHH!!!!

33:59

Prelude to The Love Guru

2014/11/15

Mike Myers commits career suicide and we want to see it happen as we prepare for The Love Guru. We review the Netflix streaming movies of: V/H/S 2 Shivers The Horror Show (or House 3) Left Behind: World at War Plus Jackie reveals her new segment called "The Rant". This week she complains about stupid 3D movies. This episode brought to you by Scatman Coruther's We're Going to Scatmando Guide to Dating for People Who Like to Poo on Each Other.

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