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PODCAST

Unf*ck Your Relationships

Michelle Panning

Welcome to Unf*ck Your Relationships Podcast! I"m your host Michelle Panning - intimacy alchemist AKA your love, sex, and relationship bestie, trigger queen, and founder of my signature program The Connected Woman. I get it, you"re done being left on read, getting ghosted and being caught up in a cycle of attracting emotionally unavailable men. Let"s be real - you have NEEDS. You deserve it all, you deserve to feel worthy and confident. You deserve a fulfilling love life. For years I was going

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

30:55

Ep 186: The “Let Them” Theory... But Make It Shadow Work

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2025/02/17

Here’s what to do if you feel someone pulling away from you. Ready? Let them. I’m serious as f*ck. If someone starts to pull away from you, if someone wants to break up, if someone refuses to meet your standards, if someone won’t pick their shit up off the floor even when you’ve asked a hundred times… Just let them. The “Let Them” theory, coined by Mel Robbins, is literally that simple. People are going to do what they’re going to do whether you try to change it or not…so just let them. You’ll be

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29:11

Ep 185: How to Detach & Stop Obsessing Over Him

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2025/02/10

When you hear “detachment,” what do you think it means? If your mind went straight to the idea of apathy, not caring what happens or what you’re doing, etcetera…you’re not the only one. But you’re also wrong. Detachment isn’t apathy. Detachment is power. And when you master detachment…it’s going to transform your whole motherf*cking life. Here are some of the things you need to detach from—and how to begin to let it all go. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for

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41:15

Ep 184: Healing from Heartbreak: BTS of My Breakup

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2025/02/03

Well. We broke up. You probably got that from the title. But in case you were wondering…no, it’s not clickbait. My partner Drew and I have decided to split up. It’s sad. And right. And so, so hard. I’m grieving. I’m excited. I’m struggling. I’m hopeful. There is such duality in breakups, no matter how healthy or unhealthy the relationship might have been…and navigating them in a regulated, healthy way is a fucking BEAST. So it’s a good thing I’m here to give you the play-by-play, yeah? Snap those

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01:03:18

Ep 183: Let's Talk CONFIDENCE feat. Caitlin Hosking

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2025/01/27

Two words: Pretty. Privilege. It’s thrown in the faces of people who happen to be conventionally attractive to imply that they have no right to complain about their struggles, particularly if they struggle with confidence. “Well, you have the perfect body, so you can’t be insecure.” “Well, you’re pretty, so what do you have to feel bad about?” You know what’s really not cute? Invalidating the experiences of other people based on their external reality. I’ve got my bestie Caitlin back on the podcast

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32:35

Ep 182: Perfectionism is Killing Your Love Life

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2025/01/20

Trying to be the perfect woman is killing your love life. I mean it—this little perfectionism thing you’ve got going on? It’s not protecting you from anything, babe—it’s actually keeping you stuck in the same patterns you’ve been playing out for your whole dating life. Perfectionism is not a protector—it’s a prison. And until you get up the courage to show up as the person you actually are, not whatever kind of woman would be the perfect match for the guy you’re seeing this month, you’re not going

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31:48

Ep 181: How to Become the Main Character in Your Love...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2025/01/13

Here’s an exciting little secret for you… Did you know that you’ve been cast as the MAIN CHARACTER in your love life? In fact, you’re not just the main character. You’re the screenwriter. The casting director. The costume designer. The credits have YOUR name all over them, babe… So why are you still acting like the f*cking side character? Too many of you are out here acting like you have to apologize for wanting the spotlight + taking up space on the stage…when you OWN THE F*CKING STAGE. This is

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37:17

Ep 180: The Ultimate Glow-Up: How to Become...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2025/01/06

It’s 2025. I don’t know about you, but I’m so fucking excited it’s a new year—and I don’t plan to finish it as the same person I was when it started. I want to be UNRECOGNIZABLE by 2026…and I want to help you get there, too. I want this year to be your ultimate fucking glow-up. But first, we need to go over some pretty crucial perspective shifts. You CAN become the most confident, iconic, badass version of yourself. But not if you keep doing life the way you’ve been doing it…and not if you sit

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46:35

Ep 179: 24 Lessons for 2024: A Wrap-Up for the...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/12/30

This one’s for the anxiously attached girlies…and everyone, honestly, because there’s some fucking gems in here. But if you have an anxious attachment style, these lessons go double for you, mmkay? Anxious attachment can feel like a life sentence. But the truth is, your attachment style IS something you can heal…but you have to start taking steps toward security. In today’s episode, we’re going to go over 24 lessons I want you to take out of 2024 and into 2025. And once you learn these lessons and

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29:35

Ep 178: How to Know When to Break Up

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/12/16

It's a question as old as relationships themselves... "How do I know when it's time to break up?" We've all asked ourselves this question one time or another...but almost no one really knows the answer. It's not easy to look at a relationship and decide whether it's fixable or totally f*cked. But there are some symptoms that will start to pop up when things have taken a turn for the worse...and some questions we can ask ourselves to figure out exactly where we stand. Stay and fight, or turn

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31:41

Ep 177: How to be the Dream Girl in Your Love Life in...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/12/09

In 2025, we’re not settling for f*cking crumbs anymore, babe. In 2025, it’s time to become the center of your own love life; to become That Girl. That Bitch. The Dream Girl. Whatever you want to call her, she’s yours for the taking—if you can actually get off your ass and do the work to become her. No more putting everyone else’s needs over yours. No more leading with your insecurities…or masking them with false perfection. No more criticizing your man into the ground, then wondering why he doesn’t

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40:39

Ep 176: Are You Really Grieving Him...Or Who You Wish...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/11/25

“He was everything I’ve ever wanted. How am I supposed to get over him?” Uh…you mean the guy you dated for two weeks, tops? Yeah…we need to chat about this, babe. Look, I’m not going to tell you that the timeframe of a relationship determines its emotional impact. It doesn’t. What I AM going to tell you (because I’ve had to tell myself a million fucking times over) is that there’s no way in hell you know this man well enough to say he’s “the one” after two fucking weeks. “But we had so much fun

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28:29

Ep 175: Why You Are So Critical of Your Partner...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/11/18

Today’s episode is inspired by a question a client recently put forward… And the answer is not going to be easy for most of you to hear. This client said that she always gives people the benefit of the doubt, trying to offer the most generous assumptions when it comes to their behavior…but when it comes to her partner, she immediately thinks—and says—the worst about his behavior. Why does that happen? This is extremely common in relationships, particularly longer-term relationships. You’ve not only

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35:23

Ep 174: The Pursuit of Perfection: What We Lose When...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/11/11

I have a complicated relationship with vulnerability. When I first started this work, I couldn’t even say the f*cking WORD. And even though I’ve gotten so much better about it…it’s still terrifying. I don’t want people to see me as less than perfect. I don’t want them to see me struggle. Because what if they see I’m not perfect, that I don’t have it all together, and I lose my credibility? What if they don’t want to work with me anymore? But I choose to be vulnerable anyway. Even on one of the

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28:15

Ep 173: Win, Lose, or Draw: When Conflict Cancels out...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/11/04

When you’re fighting to win the argument, not to reconnect with your partner…everyone loses. We all looove winning an argument…at first. It feels f*cking great to get the last word. The high of nailing that last comeback is addicting… And so, so fleeting. It feels good in the moment to “win”...but the thing is, you haven’t actually “won.” In fact, odds are good that both your partner AND you have lost something through this conflict. If you’re struggling with unresolved conflict in your

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59:12

Ep 172: How the Body Speaks: A Conversation With...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/10/28

I am on the edge of my fucking seat today about getting to introduce you to my newest guest: one of my OG clients from all the way back in Connected Woman circa 2020, Steph Normoyle! Steph Normoyle is a somatic practitioner and the founder of Club Soma, a wellness space for women seeking true embodied transformation—without the bullshit. As a somatic practitioner, she helps women connect with their bodies, rediscover their desires, and express themselves with boldness and integrity. But back in

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34:27

Ep 171: 7 Myths About Anxious Attachment

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/10/21

People have some intense fucking beliefs surrounding anxious attachment… “Anxious attachers are unstable.” “Anxious attachers are just way too fucking emotional.” “My anxious attachment means I’ll never have a relationship—I don’t deserve it.” No, no, and fuuuucking no. Anxious attachment causes some wild behaviour…but none of it makes you unworthy of love. And like all behaviours, we can find ways to clock them, own them, and clean them up. Let’s go over seven myths about anxious attachment…and

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26:42

Ep 170: Are You Secretly Controlling in Your...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/10/14

Here’s a question for you: Are you a controlling partner? If your gut reaction was “FUCK no! I’m not controlling at all!” or “Not a chance, my partner’s the controlling one!” or some other fucking enraged denial… Let me change the question. Have you ever cancelled plans with your friends to meet up with the guy you’ve been on a couple dates with? Have you ever apologized first in a fight…even if you’re not at fault? Have you ever dropped everything in order to be there for your partner, regardless

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26:10

Ep 169: How Your Inner Child Is Ruining Your Love Life

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/10/07

I’m going to be honest… People love to joke about something being healing to their inner child. But if you’re not ACTUALLY doing the work to heal your inner child, well… Bad news. She’s actually going to f*ck up your love life for the foreseeable future. I’m not saying this to put you down—it’s just the truth. If your inner child is acting up, it’s going to ruin your ability to have a secure, stable relationship…and a lot of other important things, too. You wouldn’t let your six-year-old self behind

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34:43

Ep 168: Your Ego is Cockblocking Your Love Life

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/09/30

It’s no secret that shadow work is the most popular girl in school when it comes to the personal development world. It’s trendy. It’s everywhere. Everyone’s talking about it, including me… But before you get into shadow work, you have to spend some time with her less sexy sister. Everyone, say hello to ego work…and say goodbye to your aversion to vulnerability. Because without vulnerability, you actually can’t form fulfilling, deep, intimate relationships with others…romantic or platonic. WORK

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36:11

Ep 167: Stuck in the Same Shitty Relationship...

Unf*ck Your Relationships ·

2024/09/23

What do getting attacked by a bear and your partner not answering your text have in common? Absolutely f*cking nothing…but according to your dysregulated nervous system? It can’t spot the differences between those two pictures. When you’re living with a dysregulated nervous system, everything is a threat. And when everything is a threat, you’re always living in one of four modes: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn. None of which will allow for a healthy, connected relationship. Your nervous system is

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