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PODCAST

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss

Kelly A Bertenshaw, MA CCC SLP ECDCS

When a loved one is diagnosed with Memory Loss or Dementia, family members can feel completely unprepared and overwhelmed. You"re now trying to juggle managing your loved one"s increasing need for care while also tending to your own family, career and life. It can truly feel like a balancing act.I"m Kelly Bertenshaw, a licensed Speech Language Pathologist and certified Dementia Care Specialist. I have worked with those affected by memory loss and their families for more than 20 years. I started this

kids & family relationships

All Episodes

13:06

A Turning Point: When "Fine At Home" No Longer Holds

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2026/04/01

In this episode, Kelly explores how a medical crisis, such as a fall or infection, often becomes the unexpected turning point when families first recognize the true extent of a loved one's dementia. From cognitive screening in the hospital to rehabilitation settings where the challenges become even more apparent, these moments, though emotionally overwhelming, can ultimately bring clarity and open the door to more realistic, proactive planning for the road ahead.Follow this episode with our "After

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16:02

Dignity of Risk: Balancing Safety and Independence

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2026/03/18

In this episode, Kelly tackles the ethical tension caregivers face between keeping loved ones with dementia safe and preserving their independence and sense of self. Through real-life stories, she introduces the concept of the "right to risk" — the idea that autonomy and uncertainty are inseparable, even for vulnerable adults. Kelly encourages "negotiated risk": practical home and communcative adaptations as alternatives to simply eliminating activities. Good caregiving isn't about preventing every

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12:45

Radical Acceptance: Overcoming Denial of a Loved...

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2026/03/04

In this episode, Kelly explores how families often fall into denial when a loved one begins to show signs of dementia. And sometimes, even after the formal diagnosis. Kelly emphasizes this isn't about shame, but understanding the causes of denial and the risks associated with postponing acceptance.FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat!https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103Please consider donating to support A BALANCING

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12:30

The Built-In Caregiver: Home

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2026/02/18

Today's focus is on ways to capitalize on and modify the home environment to support a loved one with memory loss. Kelly walks listeners through thoughtful home modifications that can act as an additional caregiver by reducing cognitive demands on people living with dementia. The results show respect for the person with dementia while reducing frustration for both caregivers and their loved ones. By designing around dementia-related brain changes, homes can help preserve independence and safety

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12:24

"No strangers in my house!"

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2026/02/04

For someone living with memory loss, life already feels less predictable. Control is slipping in quiet ways. And home may be the last place that still feels familiar. The last place where they feel like themselves. So when help enters the conversation, it can feel less like support and more like losing autonomy. That’s why pushing harder often backfires. In this episode, Kelly talks about introducing care gradually with familiarity, consistency, and choice. Because the wall doesn’t come down when

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11:38

ENCORE EPISODE: "Is It Alzheimer's?"

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2026/01/21

Today, Kelly shares our most listened-to episode, "Is It Alzheimer's?". Aside from cancer, Alzheimer’s Disease is often regarded as one of the greatest fears for many individuals. In fact, when people begin to experience memory lapses, they often jump to the conclusion that it might be Alzheimer’s. However, the disease encompasses much more than just memory problems. In this episode, Kelly will replace fear with facts and offer steps you can take now to clear up any misconceptions.Our Facebook

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15:46

Navigating Denial: When A Loved One Struggles With...

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2026/01/07

Today’s episode explores one of the most tender, and often misunderstood, parts of dementia care: denial. Kelly will talk about why denial shows up, why it isn’t always stubbornness, and how fear, identity, and self-protection play a role. She'll also offer ways to start compassionate conversations, how to respond when others don’t see the problem, and what to do when denial becomes unsafe — without damaging trust or dignity. If you’ve ever heard the words, “I’m fine, nothing is wrong,” and felt

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1:47

A HOLIDAY MESSAGE

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/12/17

As this year comes to a close, I just want to take a moment to thank you for being here. Whether you’re listening while driving, folding laundry, sitting quietly after a long day, or taking a much-needed pause—you matter, and I’m really glad you found your way to this space.The holidays can bring warmth and connection, but they can also bring grief, stress, complicated family dynamics, and reminders of how much has changed when memory loss is part of your life. If this season feels heavy for you,

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11:42

Holidays and Caring Across Distances

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/12/03

The holidays bring joy, memories, and for long-distance caregivers, a mix of love and guilt. In this episode of A Balancing Act, Kelly offers loving, practical ways to stay connected with your loved one living with dementia, even from miles away. Learn how to make every call and visit more meaningful, how to support the caregiver at home, and how to find help for yourself when it’s time to hang up the phone, or travel back to your home. Because caregiving doesn’t stop when there is distance between

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14:37

Season 2 Episode 2 Thanksgiving & Memory Loss

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/11/19

Thanksgiving is here, and while the holidays can be full of joy and tradition, they can also be challenging when someone you love is living with memory loss and dementia, In this episode, Kelly explores how to adjust expectations with compassion, how to support your loved one at their level of ability, and how to protect connection over perfection. Whether you’re hosting a big family meal or calling from a distance, these ideas can help bring more peace and less overwhelm to the day.Our Facebook

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15:41

Season 2 Episode 1 When Time Slips: Dementia and...

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/11/05

In this episode, we talk about what happens when a loved one begins losing their sense of time — mixing up days, seasons, appointments, or believing events are happening “right now” when they aren’t. These time slips can be confusing and emotional for everyone involved. We’ll explore why the brain struggles to track time in dementia and share gentle ways to respond, reduce stress, and stay connected when time doesn’t feel steady anymore.FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a

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13:36

Season 1 Episode 30 Dementia & Driving: When To Take...

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/10/22

Taking away the car keys is one of the hardest moments in dementia care. It’s not just about safety. It’s about love, dignity, and protection. In this week’s episode, Kelly will guide you through the signs it’s time, how to talk about it, what to do if your loved one refuses, and how to plan for what comes next, all while helping your loved one feel supported, not punished.FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat!https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103Want to

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12:08

Season 1 Episode 29 Avoiding Diagnosis: The Stigma...

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/10/08

Many families delay a dementia diagnosis because they’re afraid of what it means—losing independence, disrupting family life, or facing an uncertain future. But silence only makes the journey harder. In this episode, Kelly explores where stigma comes from, why it keeps people from seeking help, and how we can begin to change the conversation. You’ll hear stories of fear, resilience, and community, and learn ways to break the silence so no one has to walk this journey alone.FACEBOOK PAGE: Message

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13:05

Season 1 Episode 28 Dementia and Refusing Help

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/09/24

One of the hardest challenges in caregiving is when a loved one with dementia refuses help. You see the risks — missed meals, cluttered spaces, unpaid bills — but every offer is met with “I don’t need help” or “I can do it myself.” It’s frustrating, even heartbreaking. In this episode, Kelly unpacks the reasons behind refusals — from changes in the brain to pride and fear — and explore the most common areas of conflict. Most importantly, you’ll learn practical strategies to shift your approach so

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13:25

Season 1 Episode 27 Caregiving Tech: Tools, Tips and...

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/09/10

Caregiving is rewarding, but it can also feel overwhelming—like you’re carrying the weight of a thousand little tasks. In this episode, Kelly explores the best tech tools designed to lighten the caregiver’s load. From medication reminder apps and “Find My” trackers to simple video calling platforms and automatic shut-offs for home safety, these smart solutions are changing the way families care for their loved ones. And get some more time in for themselves.FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave your questions

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13:04

Season 1 Episode 26 Visiting A Loved One In Memory Care

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/08/27

In this episode, Kelly provides essential guidance for families visiting loved ones in memory care communities. Kelly addresses common challenges families face, such as improving the quality of visits and setting realistic expectations. She emphasizes the importance of understanding the stages of dementia and aligning visits with the routine and preferences of the loved one. Practical advice includes planning visits around constructive activities, bringing items of interest, managing sensory

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13:39

Season 1 Episode 25 "How Can I Improve MY Memory?"

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/08/13

In this episode, Kelly talks about how normal it is to expect occasional forgetfulness as we age and clarifies that it's not the same as memory loss or dementia. She explains how memory works through three stages and provides strategies and tips to boost memory. Kelly also provides practical exercises to keep our brains sharp and active as we age. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a

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15:23

Season 1 Episode 24 Dementia and Family Relationships

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/08/06

In this podcast episode, Kelly discusses how dementia affects family relationships, offering practical advice for spouses, adult children, and grandchildren. She emphasizes the importance of understanding dementia, open communication, dividing caregiving tasks, and supporting each other. The key message: approach the journey with empathy, flexibility, and love, and seek help when needed.FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a

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11:42

Season 1 Episode 23 "Why Is He Isolating Himself?"

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/07/23

In this episode, Kelly shares personal experiences and discusses how communicative and cognitive changes due to dementia affect seniors' abilities to engage in activities they once enjoyed. Kelly emphasizes the importance of adapting social activities to match the abilities of those with dementia to keep them engaged and improve their quality of life. She offers practical advice on modifying environments, simplifying games, and using effective communication strategies to reduce frustration and

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12:23

Season 1 Episode 22. Should I Lie To My Loved One?

A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One"s Memory Loss ·

2025/07/09

In this episode, Kelly addresses the moral dilemma caregivers face: whether to lie or tell the truth to loved ones with dementia. Traditionally, reality orientation—telling the truth—was seen as a matter of principle. But from the 1990s, therapeutic fibbing—small, compassionate lies—gained acceptance. Kelly argues for 'leading with their reality,' adapting responses based on the stage of dementia and what comforts or calms the person. She provides practical advice, ways to respond that meet your

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42 results

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