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PODCAST

The Divorce Decision Podcast

If you’re contemplating divorce, wondering whether your marriage can be rebuilt, or trying to make a clear decision without acting out of panic, fear, guilt, or pressure, this podcast is for you.The Divorce Decision Podcast is for people in unhappy, uncertain, or emotionally painful marriages who are asking one of the hardest questions of their lives: Should I stay, or should I go?Hosted by Kari Hoskins, a professionally certified relationship coach with a Master’s Degree in Interpersonal

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

14:02

Ep. 67: The Pain You’re Trying to Avoid May Be the...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/10/01

When you’re stuck trying to decide what to do about your marriage, your mind can spend a lot of time imagining everything that could go wrong. What if I stay and nothing ever changes? What if I leave and end up alone? What if I make the wrong decision and regret it? In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, I’m talking about what I call anticipatory pain—the pain and difficult emotions we imagine we might experience after making a decision. But sometimes, there’s an important realizati...

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15:30

Ep. 66: I Know I Should Leave… So Why Can’t I?

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/09/24

You know your marriage isn’t working. Maybe there’s been repeated infidelity. Addiction. Years of disrespect. An unequal partnership. Broken trust. Or maybe you’ve carried the financial, emotional, and practical weight of the marriage for so long that you’re completely exhausted. You can see the problems clearly. You may even think, I know I should leave. So why can’t you? In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, I’m talking about a very specific kind of stuck: when part of you believ...

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17:07

Ep. 65 "But My Spouse Is A Good Person... "

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/09/17

He's a good dad." "She's never cheated." "Everybody loves them." If you're carrying guilt about questioning your marriage because your spouse is a good person, this episode is for you. So many of my clients feel guilty questioning their marriage because their spouse hasn't done anything "bad enough" to justify it. No affair. No addiction. No blowup. J Just years of emotional disconnection, resentment, or feeling more like roommates than partners. And because their spou...

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16:14

Ep. 64 How Coaching Can Help You Stop Going in...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/09/10

When you're at the Crossroads in your marriage, it can feel like you're having the same conversation with yourself over and over again. Should I stay? Should I leave? Have I tried hard enough? Am I reacting out of anger? Am I staying because I'm scared? What if I regret whatever I choose? In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, I’m breaking down what coaching actually does when you’re stuck in that place of uncertainty. This isn’t about someone telling you whether to stay married or ...

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12:47

Ep. 63 Should You Stay, Leave, or Keep Waiting?

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/09/03

Do you feel torn between staying, leaving, or waiting? Stage Five of the divorce decision process is the Crossroads, and it's one of the most exhausting places to be. In this episode, I'm breaking down why this stage feels like fighting a war inside your own head, what keeps people stuck here, and the two questions that can bring real clarity: what do you actually want, and what are you afraid will happen if you choose it? If you've been asking yourself "should I stay or sho...

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15:50

Ep. 62 Letting Go Of Resentment Doesn’t Mean...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/08/27

If resentment has become a major part of your marriage, you may assume that letting go of it means forgiving your spouse, excusing what happened, or deciding to stay. It doesn’t. In this episode, I’m staying with Stage Four: The Fracture a little longer to talk about what resentment actually is, why it can become so emotionally exhausting, and what it really means to begin working through it. I’ll explain why resentment is more than simply remembering what happened. It’s often the experience ...

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23:55

Ep. 61: Is Resentment Making You Question Your Marriage?

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/08/20

You used to give your spouse the benefit of the doubt. Now you don't. Somewhere along the way, the small stuff stopped feeling small. The forgotten text, the late pickup, the dishes left again — they don't just annoy you anymore. They feel like proof of something. And when your spouse apologizes now, some part of you doesn't quite believe it. If you're guarded instead of tender. If you're keeping score without meaning to. If effort from your spouse gets met with suspicion instead of relief — ...

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22:32

Ep. 60: The Testing Stage — 4 Mistakes That Can...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/08/13

You told your spouse something has to change. And now you’re watching. Are they following through? Is the effort real? Will it last—or are things eventually going to slide right back to the way they were before? Welcome to Stage 3: Testing. In this episode, I’m talking about four of the most common mistakes I see people make during this stage of the divorce decision process—and how those mistakes can make it much harder to figure out whether your marriage is actually changing. I’ll talk about...

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21:40

Ep. 59: Stage 2 Truth Telling -"I Need You to...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/08/06

If you've been hinting at how unhappy you are and hoping your spouse will finally connect the dots — this episode is for you. In Stage One, you privately recognized something wasn't right. Stage Two is where that private knowing becomes a conversation. Not another argument about the dishes or the phone or who forgot what — but the real, direct conversation about what this has started to mean for you and for your marriage. I'm walking you through what Truth Telling actually sounds like, why wa...

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22:32

Ep. 58: Stage 1- The Moment You Can't Pretend Anymore

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/07/30

Before anyone starts thinking about divorce, there's a quieter moment most people never talk about — the moment the unhappiness stops feeling temporary. Maybe it's a hum of loneliness that won't go away, even when your spouse is sitting right next to you. Maybe it's a string of small moments that were never really resolved, just carried. In this episode, we break down Stage One of the divorce decision process — what I call A Knowing — including what open loops are, why silen...

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13:05

Ep. 57: The Missing Map For Couples Considering Divorce

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/07/23

If you've been asking yourself, "Should I stay or should I leave?" over and over again, this episode is for you. Many people spend four to five years contemplating divorce before making a decision. The problem isn't that you can't make up your mind—it's that you're trying to answer one question without realizing you're actually moving through a process. In this kickoff episode of my six-part series, I introduce The Six Stages of the Divorce Decision—the framework I use to help people understa...

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21:32

Ep. 56: 3 Things Your Unhappiness Is Teaching You

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/07/16

If you're unhappy in your marriage, it's easy to get stuck pointing at the obvious stuff — the dishes he won't do, the phone she won't put down, the sex you're not having, the way he shuts down every time you bring something up. But what if the behavior isn't actually the problem? In today's episode, I break down three things your unhappiness is trying to teach you — if you can stop focusing on the unhappiness itself long enough to hear it. First, I talk about how almost every complaint...

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9:50

Ep. 55: Is Your Conflict Normal? 3 Questions to Ask...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/07/02

Is the fighting in your marriage normal — or is it a sign of something deeper? Today, I'm answering one of the questions I get asked most by walking you through three simple signs to check in your own relationship. You'll learn: · Why the topic of a fight matters less than whether it stays on topic — and what it means when small arguments turn into old, unrelated hurts · The real difference between couples who repair after conflict and...

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18:05

Ep. 54: Are You the Pursuer or the Withdrawer in Your...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/06/25

What if the biggest problem in your marriage isn’t the topic you keep fighting about… but the pattern you fall into every time you try to talk about it? In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, I’m breaking down the pursuit-withdrawal cycle — also called the demand-withdraw cycle — and why it can quietly create resentment, loneliness, panic, shutdown, and emotional distance in a marriage. This is the pattern where one spouse pushes for answers, connection, reassurance, repair, or chan...

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16:27

Ep. 53 Hard Season or Marriage Crossroads? Here's How...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/06/18

Is your marriage going through a hard season, or are you standing at a real crossroads? In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, Kari Hoskins helps you tell the difference between a temporary rough patch and a deeper marriage crisis. When you’re unhappy, disconnected, resentful, or emotionally exhausted, it can be hard to know what is actually happening. Is this stress? Is it burnout? Is it parenting, money, grief, or a difficult year? Or has something more serious shifted in the rela...

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9:26

Ep. 52: Unhappily Married? Stop Doing These 3 Things...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/06/11

Unhappy marriages don’t usually fall apart overnight. They often deteriorate through small, repeated patterns that become part of everyday life. In this episode, Kari shares three things to stop doing if you’re unhappy in your marriage: belittling or demeaning your partner, keeping score, and avoiding conversations when issues are still small. These habits may feel understandable when you’re hurt or resentful, but they quietly add fuel to the fire. They create more disconnection, more resentm...

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15:31

Ep. 51 Can Your Marriage Be Saved? The Question of...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/06/04

In the final episode of the Can This Marriage Heal? series, Kari tackles the question that keeps people up at night: If real change were possible, would you actually want to stay? This isn't a question about whether your marriage can be fixed. It's a question about whether you want it to be — and those are very different things. Kari breaks down the difference between desire and obligation, and why showing up out of duty alone will quietly make things worse, not better. You'll learn what it s...

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13:08

Ep. 50: Can Your Marriage Be Saved? One Thing You...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/05/28

Can Your Marriage Be Saved? One Thing You Can't Ignore Are you wondering if your marriage can be fixed — or if it's already too late? In this episode of the Divorce Decision Podcast, host Kari Hoskins digs into one of the most important questions you need to answer before you can even think about saving your marriage: Is there still respect between you and your spouse? You might not feel in love right now. You might not even like each other very much. But without respect, repair is almost imp...

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12:17

Ep. 49: Can Your Marriage Be Saved? The First Sign...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/05/21

If you're wondering whether or not your marriage can be repaired, this episode is for you. In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, Kari Hoskins begins a 3-part series on one of the biggest questions couples face when their marriage is in crisis: Can this marriage actually heal? Part 1 focuses on ownership. When one spouse wants to repair the marriage and the other is unsure, it can be hard to know whether real change is possible. Most people say they are willing to take respons...

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17:07

Ep. 48 How to Live Together While Deciding Whether...

The Divorce Decision Podcast ·

2026/05/14

What do you do when divorce has been brought up or just decided on but you’re still living together? This is one of the most emotionally confusing stages of the divorce decision. You may still be sharing a bedroom, parenting together, eating dinner in the same kitchen, or managing bills and errands — but underneath all of that, the marriage feels uncertain. In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, I’m talking about how to live under the same roof while deciding whether to divorce. You...

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