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PODCAST

You Keep Me Sane

Aileen Harvey and Julie Fahy

For 10 years, Aileen and Julie have been each other"s sounding board from opposite sides of the globe – Aileen in London and Julie in Melbourne.They have navigated everything – motherhood, relationships, menopause, health, grief, and everything in between – through daily voice messages. These exchanges often became lifelines, and now they share that space with their listeners.In You Keep Me Sane, Aileen and Julie hold honest conversations on life"s challenges, growth, and connection. They lend an

society & culture mental health

All Episodes

18:37

The Day You Realise You Don't Need To Be Chosen Anymore

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/04/15

Episode Overview This week, we explore the need to be chosen — at work, in friendships, in love, and in family roles. For years, being picked can feel like proof of worth… and not being picked can quietly unravel us. We unpack how midlife starts to loosen that wiring, and how the shift from “please choose me” to “I choose me” changes everything. Key Discussion Points Aileen notices she no longer needs praise or an invitation to feel valuableJulie reflects on how fear of rejection shaped her ...

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27:04

Quiet Wealth : Why Peace Is The New Status Symbol

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/04/01

Episode Overview This week, we explore a quiet but powerful shift happening in midlife: the move from chasing traditional success to craving something far less flashy - peace. For years, achievement meant striving. Building. Proving. Being impressive. We grew up in a culture that celebrated ambition, hustle and visible markers of success. And in many ways, we embodied that - high achievers, big thinkers, always “on.” But midlife changes the lens. With shifting hormones, teenage children, agei...

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20:46

The Negative Jar: Why One Comment Can Ruin Your Day

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/03/18

This episode grew from a simple image we shared in a recent Sanity Check: two jars. One jar is full — kind words, encouragement, praise, moments where someone saw you and appreciated you. The other jar holds just one negative comment. And yet… it’s the second jar most of us carry. We explore why one raised eyebrow, one piece of criticism, one offhand remark can eclipse a hundred positive moments. Why it lingers. Why it replays. Why it feels like proof. We talk about negativity bias, self-wort...

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21:43

Losing Our Voice - When Midlife Asks Us 'Who Am I?'

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/03/04

Episode Overview There’s a moment many women reach - often in midlife - where we stop and quietly think, Who am I actually? It doesn’t arrive with drama. It doesn’t happen overnight. It’s usually the result of years spent being reliable, capable, needed. Years of making decisions for the family, the partnership, the household unit. Years of choosing what works. And then one day, something pauses us. Maybe it’s exhaustion. Maybe it’s hormones shifting. Maybe it’s the kids growing up. Maybe it’...

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30:09

Always On: The Hidden Cortisol Cost of a Busy Life

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/02/18

Episode overview In this episode, we explore what it really means to live in an always-on world — and how that constant state of availability quietly keeps our stress response switched on. Cortisol has become a bit of a villain in wellness conversations, but we unpack why it’s not the problem in itself. Cortisol is essential. The issue is that modern life rarely gives our bodies the chance to switch it off. From 3am wake-ups and belly changes to mental load, boundaries, and self-worth, this i...

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22:50

Wintering: Honouring Your Energy Through the Seasons

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/02/04

Episode Overview In this episode, we explore the idea of wintering - not as a trend or aesthetic, but as a very real biological and emotional experience. Recording from opposite sides of the world - one of us in a UK winter, the other in an Australian summer - we reflect on how seasons, light, energy, and life demands shape the way we feel, move, and cope. We talk about slowing down without guilt, listening to the body instead of forcing productivity, and what happens when winter stops being ...

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17:24

Heartbreak and Self-Worth: Who Are You When the...

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/01/28

Episode Overview When a relationship ends, it can feel completely disorientating - like the ground has shifted beneath you and nothing quite makes sense anymore. In this episode, we talk honestly about heartbreak, obsession, rejection, and the deep vulnerability that comes with losing not just a partner, but a version of yourself. Drawing on our own experiences of breakups across different stages of life, we explore why the pain feels so consuming, how self-worth often gets tangled up in reje...

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19:57

Trying To Figure It Out: Identity, Self-Worth, and...

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/01/21

Episode overview A line from Jon Bon Jovi that genuinely stopped Aileen in her tracks: “We’re all just here trying to figure it out.” Coming from someone who looks like he’s “made it”, it lands differently - like an equaliser and a hand on your shoulder. This one is about humility, rebuilding, and the midlife unravel - the kind that can feel frightening… but might actually be the start of coming home to yourself. Key discussion points The line that hit hard: “We’re all just here trying to fi...

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18:26

Boundaries Vs Belonging : When Self-Worth Shapes Our...

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/01/14

Episode Overview In this episode, we explore a tension many of us feel deeply — the pull between wanting space and craving connection. When does protecting our peace start to feel like shutting people out? And why can setting boundaries trigger so much guilt, fear, or worry about losing belonging? We reflect on how our early conditioning shapes the way we relate, why many of us learned that belonging meant being agreeable, and how self-worth plays a crucial role in whether boundaries feel saf...

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24:32

Playing it Small: Why We Dim Ourselves (And How To Stop)

You Keep Me Sane ·

2026/01/07

Episode overview In this episode, we unpack why so many of us learn to play it small — not because we lack confidence or ambition, but because at some point it felt safer to do so. Following the huge response to our Don’t Hide Your Shine sanity check, we explore how hiding your shine shows up in everyday life, where it comes from, and why it’s so closely tied to self-worth. We talk about school, family systems, culture, gendered expectations, and nervous-system protection — and how, over tim...

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16:49

You Don't Need A New You

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/12/31

Episode Overview New Year’s Eve often sits in a strange in-between space - part reflection, part expectation. In this conversation, we gently unpack why this moment can feel heavy with pressure, and how New Year’s resolutions so often become another way we tell ourselves we’re not enough yet. We talk honestly about where resolutions really come from, how self-worth gets tangled up in performance and productivity, and why so many of us end up feeling guilty by February. From bin-bag workouts i...

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10:32

Connection at Christmas: It Isn't About The Table

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/12/24

Episode Overview It’s Christmas Eve, and today we’re sitting with one word that has shown up again and again this year: connection. Not the glossy, picture-perfect kind we see in adverts, but the quiet, truthful kind that grounds us - especially when the season feels full, loud, or lonely. In this short episode, we explore why connection becomes harder to access at the very moment we need it most, and how presence - with ourselves and with others - can bring us back to what matters. Key Dis...

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19:58

Sitting with the Shift: We’ll Know Them Longer as...

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/12/17

Episode overview In this episode, we pause on one simple line that stopped us in our tracks: “We’ll know our children as adults far longer than we’ll know them as children.” We take a trip down memory lane talk about how quickly the “little years” pass, why those toddler days feel so vivid, and what it’s like to suddenly realise we’re parenting almost-adults. From Peppa Pig pyjamas and Iggle Piggle shows to mascara, moods and slammed doors, we look at how our kids have changed – and how we ha...

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21:09

Quiet Doesn’t Mean Weak: Redefining Strength,...

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/12/10

Episode overview In this episode, we explore a sneaky belief many of us absorbed young: that the loudest person in the room is the strongest one - and that being quieter, reflective or sensitive somehow makes you weaker. We talk about loudness as a shield, teenage friendship dynamics, being labelled “weak” for not being the loud one, and how that seeps into adult life - careers, friendships, parenting and the way we judge women who live differently. Quiet strength, we’ve realised, often...

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43:42

From Small To Seen : Owning Your Worth

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/12/03

Episode OverviewThis week we’re joined by Monica Maldonado - the voice behind @thepowerofgoodenough - for a raw, hopeful conversation about how low self-worth can quietly shape our lives even when we’ve had a “stable” upbringing. Monica shares how being the youngest of four, people-pleasing, and staying “small” became an identity she had to unlearn in adulthood. We talk about awakening moments, inner-child work, nervous-system safety, micro-actions, and the difference between healing and tran...

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30:56

Always On: Reclaiming Your Attention in a World That...

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/11/26

Episode OverviewWe talk about the “always on” culture - phones, pings, and pressure to reply instantly - and how it hijacks presence, deep focus, and self-worth. From family group chats and school apps to work Slack and late-night DMs, we explore why constant accessibility feels normal (and even “kind”), how it fuels anxiety and perfectionism, and simple, compassionate boundaries that let you choose when you’re available. The goal isn’t a digital detox; it’s digital boundaries - so you can be...

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24:11

Emotional Vampires: When Caring Becomes Carrying

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/11/19

Episode Overview We dive into that sticky space between empathy and exhaustion—the moment a caring friend becomes the “emotional sponge” (hello, emotional vampires 👀). We talk about invisible emotional labour, midlife capacity, Catholic/learned guilt, and why stepping back isn’t selfish—it’s self-respect. We share how chronic one-way “offloading” keeps both people stuck, and how gentle, clear boundaries help everyone grow. Key Discussion Points Monologue vs. conversation: the red flag of

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22:10

The Quiet Bloom: Growing in Your Own Time

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/11/12

Episode Overview Feeling stretched thin, foggy, or quietly burning out? You’re not alone. In this episode, we get honest about that midlife feeling of running on empty - when hormones, deadlines, and daily demands leave you wondering how it’s all sustainable. Inspired by Dame Patricia Routledge’s beautiful reflection before her 95th birthday, we talk about what it really means to bloom again. From her role as Hyacinth “Bouquet” to her later-life creativity and peace, her words remind us that ...

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53:53

Separation & Self-Worth: Redefining What It Means to...

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/11/05

Episode Overview In this episode we sit down with Kate Daly, co-founder of Amicable, to explore how self-worth, identity, and personal growth are intertwined with relationships - and what happens when those relationships end. Kate shares her wisdom from years of supporting couples through separation and co-parenting, offering a compassionate reframe: divorce isn’t a failure - it’s a change in how a family operates so everyone can thrive. Together, we talk about how easily self-worth becomes t...

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31:33

Living A Quiet Life with Vanessa Marie Dewsbury:...

You Keep Me Sane ·

2025/10/29

Episode Overview In a world that feels louder and busier than ever, finding peace can feel impossible - especially for introverts who need quiet to recharge. In this episode, we sit down with Vanessa Marie Dewsbury, best selling author and podcaster, who opens up about how she embraced a slower, softer way of living after years of tying her self-worth to busyness. We talk about why stillness is essential for our mental and emotional health, how introverts can protect their energy in an ...

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116 results

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