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PODCAST

What People Miss

Cordelia Gaffar

What People Miss: Life is Best Lived in subtle noticing. Join me for conversations about what you miss about yourself, the people in your life, why you are not advancing in your career and how to reconnect intentionally, strategically and sustainably. Tune in for a conversation that feels like a deep breath, a warm embrace, and a radical permission slip to center your own joy again. For resources join The Ultimate Joy Goddess Community

society & culture philosophy

All Episodes

34:08

Savoring Life After Shattered: Grief, Rage, and the...

What People Miss ·

2026/01/06

What People Miss with Cordelia Gaffar is a space for women who are done merely surviving and are ready to savor life, even in the midst of grief, transition, and rage. Through intimate, unfiltered conversations, award‑winning podcast host, best‑selling author, and Ultimate Joy Goddess Cordelia Gaffar walks you through the quiet moments most people skip over when they are trying to be “strong” and keep it all together.paste.txtWhat this episode exploresIn this powerful episode, Cordelia opens the

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48:38

Navigating Respectability Politics: A Deep Dive

What People Miss ·

2025/12/30

Why do so many of us comply with norms that don’t actually fit who we are?In this episode, we pull back the curtain on respectability politics—how they are shaped by colonization, religion, and the longing to belong—and what it costs us to keep performing “acceptable” instead of being fully alive. The conversation traces how compliance often grows from a desire for safety and community, not weakness, and why justice can never be one-size-fits-all when every story and body is different.Together, we

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49:44

Silence at Work: The Societal Impact of...

What People Miss ·

2025/12/23

Silence at Work: The Societal Impact of Respectability Politics with Dr. Christopher N SmithIn part two of our series on respectability politics, host Cordelia Gaffar and guest Dr. Chris N. Smith go deeper into the emotional and embodied cost of constantly performing for acceptance. Together, they explore how conformity drains our energy, suppresses joy, and subtly distorts our sense of success and self-worth.This conversation invites you to reclaim self-nurturing as an act of resistance and

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33:58

What is Respectability Politics with Dr. Christopher...

What People Miss ·

2025/12/19

“Silence says more than words” could be the subtitle of my conversation with Dr. Chris N. Smith. Together, we explore the messy, very human space where marginalization, respectability politics, and self-nurturing collide, unpacking how survival strategies like code switching shape identity, behavior, and belonging. The episode traces the emotional toll of constantly monitoring how you speak, move, and show up, and what happens in the body and mind when “fitting in” becomes a full-time job.We dive

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18:36

Energy Healing is Self-Nurturing with Madala Machini

What People Miss ·

2025/12/16

This episode invites listeners into a tender, truth-telling conversation between Cordelia Gaffar and yoga teacher and energy healer Madala Machini about what it really means to care for yourself at the deepest level. Together, they explore how practices like acupuncture, meditation, and yoga support healing not just on the surface, but all the way down to the cellular level, reminding us that the body is always working on our behalf.Madala shares her transformative journey into energy healing,

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33:33

Self Nurturing is Intimacy even in Difficult Times...

What People Miss ·

2025/12/09

🌟 Ever felt like intimacy is just out of reach during tough times?In our latest podcast episode, we dive into the importance of self-intimacy and being present with our bodies, especially when life gets challenging.Feeling disconnected? Remember, it’s okay to acknowledge your needs!How do you stay connected with yourself during tough times? In Tantra, we keep our eyes open because inside outside same.So how does that look in real life? I interviewed one of my classmates at The Amina Institute to

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31:44

Self Nurturing is Visioning with Bemene Piaro

What People Miss ·

2025/12/02

In the episode, I get to sit down with Bemen Piaro, a previous guest and talk about two of our upcoming events including Visioning as Self-Nurturing.The Whole Tantrum Party on Dec 27, 2025https://cordeliagaffar.com/services/personal-development/the-whole-tantrum-party-december-27th-150527445The Wholeness Visioning Retreat on January 10, 2026If you’ve been moving fast, making decisions on the fly, or feeling stretched thin, clarity might be exactly what your mind and body are craving. And clarity

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13:47

Let’s Talk About De-Centering Others

What People Miss ·

2025/11/18

In this episode, I invite you into a tender yet rebellious conversation about what it truly means to de-center others and reclaim your own emotional, mental, and spiritual bandwidth.For so many of us—especially women—we were taught to give, give, give.To self-deprive.To silence our desires.To see ourselves only in relation to someone else, especially a man.But what happens when we consciously choose to break those patterns?This episode explores the courageous act of rebelling against what is

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35:13

Navigating Family Dynamics with Accountability Coach...

What People Miss ·

2025/11/11

In this episode, Coach Sandy B, my guest, opens her heart about the journey of learning to tell the truth—especially with the people who raised, shaped, and challenged us the most: our family. We explore what happens when we begin to communicate honestly after years of silence, suppression, or saying only what we believed others could handle.I share my personal reflections on accountability, the complicated layers of family dynamics, and how self-awareness invites us to show up differently. And

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15:18

Let's Talk Respectability Politics with Cordelia Gaffar

What People Miss ·

2025/11/04

Let's Talk Respectability PoliticsIn this episode, I open a heartfelt conversation about respectability politics and the myth of imposter syndrome. We’ve been told that imposter syndrome is something we must “fix” within ourselves—especially if we are women, mothers, creatives, or leaders who dare to do life differently. But what if the real issue is not within us at all?I explore how the world we move through was not designed with all of our identities, expressions, or cultural truths in mind—and

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48:08

Love Awakened: Healing the Blockages That Keep You...

What People Miss ·

2025/10/28

Love Awakened: Healing the Blockages That Keep You From LoveLove isn’t something we chase—it’s something we remember.In this soul-stirring conversation, I sit down with Renee Miller, Founder of The Love Camp and my co-creator of the Love Awakened Retreat for Women, to explore the invisible barriers that keep us from experiencing the fullness of love. We unpack how trauma, self-protection, and cultural conditioning can quietly shape the way we give, receive, and even define love.Set against the lush,

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52:52

What is Really Robbing You of Your Joy with Zahra...

What People Miss ·

2025/10/21

SummaryIn this conversation, Zaha Aljabri and James Faghmous discuss the various factors that rob people of their joy, particularly focusing on capitalism and its associated beliefs. They explore the importance of recognizing one's true nature and spiritual intelligence as a means to reconnect with joy. The discussion also touches on parenting in a capitalistic society, cultural expectations, and the role of joy in spirituality. Ultimately, they emphasize the need to reclaim joy amidst chaos and the

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55:21

What is Really Robbing Your of Your Pleasure with...

What People Miss ·

2025/10/14

In this enlightening conversation, Willie J and I delve into the concept of pleasure, exploring its foundations, the importance of awareness and responsibility in seeking joy, and the transformative power of detachment. How do you do that in these times?Are there practices that you are missing or could deepen?You will enjoy this riveting exchanges between mature believers of different dogma choosing the joy of spirituality as a role model of what is possible.Write me at hello@cordeliagaffar.com and

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17:40

The Whole Tantrum Party Feeling in Community

What People Miss ·

2025/10/07

The Whole Tantrum Party Feeling with Community. Subscribe here. In this opening season episode, I outline reasons to have a whole tantrum. You may think that is not very mature or sensible and I beg to differ. Listen to the six reasons you need to have a whole tantrum and my further invitation to experience that with me. This episode also serves as the guide for season 2 and the conversations you will hear with varying spiritual and religious filters. Feel into your body as you listen. Do you feel

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17:32

Why Rage is Required for Your Ultimate Joy

What People Miss ·

2025/08/08

Why Rage is Required for Your Ultimate Joy!This episode is about extreme feelings that are available to open you up to your core for your ultimate joy. How are you using your rage? Are you using it?I also wrote more about this in my substack. Subscribe, comment and enjoy!https://open.substack.com/pub/cordeliagaffar/p/why-rage-is-required?r=1z8t8j&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=trueRage and Joy: The concept of rage as a necessary emotion for ultimate joy, and how to

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38:30

Visibility Cures Feeling Invisible: Seeing the True...

What People Miss ·

2025/07/29

What if the way you show up in the world—on stage, on camera, or even in your daily life—wasn’t about performing… but about being fully, unapologetically YOU?In this powerful and soul-nourishing conversation, I sit down with Lucy Devi Hall, a visibility and public speaking coach who helps entrepreneurs fall in love with how they show up. Lucy’s unique approach blends emotional strategy, embodied confidence, and parts work, guiding leaders to be seen without shrinking or shape-shifting to fit

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01:05:38

The Science of Joy: Stop Negative Meditation & Live...

What People Miss ·

2025/07/20

“Joy is a lifestyle, not something you buy.” – Richard NoelIn this week’s What People Miss, we’re talking about how to live joyfully, intentionally, and in alignment with your true self. My guest Richard Noel — sound therapist, musician, and joy advocate — reveals how:✔ Incantations reprogram your mind faster than affirmations ✔ Your mood is your Wi-Fi (it affects every connection you have) ✔ Emotional baggage blocks your natural state of happiness ✔ Worrying is a form of negative meditation you can

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45:12

"We Can Catch This Healing" – A Conversation on...

What People Miss ·

2025/07/13

"We Can Catch This Healing" – A Conversation on Wholeness, Vulnerability & Black Masculinity 🎙️✨In this powerful and heartfelt episode, I sit down with Bernard to reflect on my guest-hosting experience at King’s Corner—the virtual sanctuary created by Black Men Heal in Philadelphia. Together, we open the door to raw, liberating dialogue on what it truly means for Black men to feel safe in their bodies, reclaim their dignity, and allow themselves to heal. 💔💫🛑 We challenge the grind. 🌀 We

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51:27

Reclaiming Wholeness: A Journey for Black Women Over 50

What People Miss ·

2025/07/06

In this deeply nourishing conversation, the Queen and I embark on an intimate exploration of what it truly means for Black women over 50 to reclaim their wholeness. Together, we dive into the rich layers of Black women's sexual liberation, the healing power of community and co-regulation, and the often unspoken impact of colorism on self-identity and desirability.We unravel the myth that worthiness is something to be earned, instead affirming that self-worth is a radical choice—one Black women must

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45:03

For Black Sexual Liberation with Queen

What People Miss ·

2025/06/29

In this powerful and liberating conversation, Cordelia sits down with Mx. Queen, LCSW, M.Ed., a somatic sex therapist and founder of the Erospirituality Centre, to explore the depths of Black sexual liberation, erotic intelligence, and the sacred intersection of spirituality and sexuality. Together, they unpack the critical distinctions between sex, sexuality, and sexual liberation—and why understanding these differences is essential for both personal healing and collective freedom.This episode

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