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PODCAST

News You Do Not Need

Inception Point Ai

"News You Do Not Need is your go-to podcast for hilariously absurd and completely unnecessary headlines! Join us as we dive into the bizarre, quirky, and downright ridiculous stories that make you laugh, scratch your head, and wonder why you’re even listening. Perfect for anyone who enjoys humor, satire, and escaping the serious side of the news cycle, this show delivers pure entertainment. Subscribe now for weekly episodes filled with oddball trivia, strange facts, and news you never knew you

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All Episodes

3:31

When 50 Sheep Crashed a German Supermarket Like They...

News You Do Not Need ·

2026/01/09

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So, in the grand carnival of human affairs, while nations argue and markets wobble, the most important thing you absolutely do not need to know is that a German supermarket was recently overrun… by about 50 sheep.Not customers dressed as sheep. Actual, wool-coated, “baa”-emitting sheep who apparently decided that automatic doors are an invitation, not a boundary. One minute, it’s a regular grocery store; the next, it’s a live-action Black Friday sale for

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3:19

Burmese Pythons Are Throwing Pool Parties in Florida...

News You Do Not Need ·

2026/01/08

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So, you know how nature documentaries always make animals look majestic and dignified? Let’s ruin that image together with a breaking story from the Florida Everglades, where Burmese pythons have apparently decided to invent… pool parties.Professional python hunters down there reported seeing something they’d never witnessed before: a whole cluster of these giant invasive snakes gathered in open water, writhing around together like they’d booked an Airbnb

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1:34

From Palacio to Prison Pajamas: Maduro's Midnight...

News You Do Not Need ·

2026/01/04

This is your News You do not Need podcast.Picture this: it's 2 a.m. in Caracas, and I'm Nicolás Maduro, the big bad dictator of Venezuela, snoozing away in my pajamas next to my wife Cilia, dreaming of oil riches and endless arepas. Suddenly—BOOM!—helicopters swarm like angry hornets, Delta Force ninjas rappel from the sky, explosions light up my fortress like the Fourth of July on steroids. I'm scrambling for my steel safe room, heart pounding, thinking, "Not the gringos again!" But nope, these

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2:57

From Moose Factory Millions to FBI Foiled Follies: A...

News You Do Not Need ·

2026/01/03

This is your News You do not Need podcast.You know, somewhere in the thunderous chaos of New Year's celebrations, while most people were nursing hangovers and pretending their gym resolutions would actually stick, a seventy-one-year-old man from Moose Factory, Ontario was discovering that his life had just fundamentally changed. Patrick Chilton won seven million, seven hundred twenty thousand, nine hundred and thirty dollars in the Thunder Bay Hospital Foundation's fifty-fifty draw. That's right,

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1:35

Ringing in 2026: Phoenix the Labs Icy Misadventure...

News You Do Not Need ·

2026/01/02

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So there I was, nursing my coffee on New Year's Day, scrolling news like a responsible adult, when I stumble on this gem: firefighters in Rhode Island heroically yanking a yellow Lab named Phoenix out of an icy pond. Yeah, you heard that right—not a polar bear, not a lost penguin, but a dog named Phoenix who decided to take a polar plunge on the first day of 2026. Picture this: it's freezing, the pond's iced over like a bad skating rink, and this goofy

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2:41

Bear Necessities: Furry Freeloader Crashes Cali Crawl...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/31

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So there I was, minding my own business in Altadena, California, sipping eggnog and dreaming of a quiet New Year's Eve, when my holiday houseguest decided to overstay his welcome—by about a month. Picture this: a 550-pound black bear, folks, the size of a furry refrigerator with claws, squeezes his chonky self through a tiny window into my crawl space under the house. I mean, who needs Netflix when you've got a real-life Goldilocks reject auditioning for

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2:04

Freeway Fart Fiasco: SoCal Gas Leak Stinks Up Holiday...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/29

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So there I was, stuck in holiday traffic on Interstate 5 north of LA, nursing a lukewarm coffee and cursing the universe for turning my quick drive into a three-hour crawl. Suddenly, the air fills with this godawful rotten egg stench—like someone microwaved a dozen farts—and boom, a massive plume of natural gas erupts from a pipeline rupture, looking exactly like a supervillain's fog machine gone wrong. Cars screeching, people gagging, and me thinking,

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3:57

Students Hack Classroom Phone Safe with Chalk Dust ...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/28

This is your News You do not Need podcast.I spent today scrolling through the news, looking for something that absolutely no one needs to know, and the universe did not disappoint. While the world argued about politics and storms, my favorite headline was: “Chinese Students Crack Code Of Classroom Phone Safe Using Chalk Dust, Internet Reacts.” Somewhere in China, there’s a teacher who thought they’d finally beaten teenage attention spans. They bought one of those lockbox “phone safes” for class. You

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1:52

Smoke Shop Smash-a-Thon: Portland's Sticky-Fingered...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/27

This is your News You do not Need podcast.Picture this: it's Christmas Eve in Portland, Oregon, and while you're stuffing your face with gingerbread, a crew of geniuses decides to go full Fast and Furious on a smoke shop called House of Pipes. These clowns don't just smash and grab—they ram a stolen car into the storefront on Southeast 41st and Hawthorne like it's a demolition derby, backing up over and over until the glass gives way. Bam! In they go, stuffing tens of thousands of dollars worth of

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1:57

Cali's Stormy Xmas: Mudslides, Rescues, and a Deadly...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/26

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So there I was, minding my own business on Christmas morning, unwrapping a gift of existential dread—aka my annual fruitcake—when I stumble across the most pointless, pants-wettingly weird news from the last day. Picture this: Southern California, land of eternal sunshine and influencers filming avocado toast, gets slammed by a storm so biblical it turns Wrightwood into a rooftop rescue reality show. I'm talking 10 inches of rain dumping on burn scars from

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2:10

Beach Cowboy's Finger Gun Fiasco: Sunny Day Turns...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/24

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So there I was, minding my own business on a sunny Tuesday at Stuart Beach in Florida, just trying to soak up some rays and maybe pretend I'm in a bad action movie. I'm Christopher Taylor from Orlando, 25 years old, feeling a bit... off, you know? Like, what's the harm in spicing up the beach vibe? I start pointing finger guns at folks lounging on their towels—pew pew!—just goofy hand gestures, no real bang-bang intended. Harmless fun, right? Wrong

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1:55

Goat Goes Rogue: Wiltshire Police Battle...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/22

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So picture this: you're cruising through the English countryside, minding your own business, when suddenly the local police show up with shields and a lasso. Not because there's a dangerous criminal on the loose, but because an escaped goat decided it had a personal vendetta against Christmas decorations and anyone unfortunate enough to be nearby.This actually happened this week in Wiltshire, England, where officers had to deploy riot shields and actual

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2:14

Vinegar Vlogger Vanquished: Chenchen's Sour Saga Ends...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/21

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So there I was, minding my own business, scrolling through my feed at 2 a.m. because apparently that's when the internet decides to drop its weirdest gems, when I stumble on this Chinese food vlogger who's just casually chewing vinegar-soaked gum like it's the hottest new flavor of Bubblicious. Her handle? @chenchenchen (vinegar version)—I mean, come on, that's not a username, that's a cry for help from someone who's mainlined pickle juice one too many

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1:26

Pup Passport Pandemonium: Viral Void's Chewiest...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/20

This is your News You do not Need podcast.Picture this: I'm scrolling through my feed last night, coffee in hand, when bam—a video pops up of a US travel vlogger staring at her shredded passport like it's the crime scene of the century. Her dog, that furry little anarchist, decided that hours before her big overseas flight was the perfect time to audition for the chew toy Olympics. Passports are tough, right? Wrong. This pup turned it into confetti, stamps and all, like it was auditioning for a

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1:45

Purrloined Package: Amazon Driver Catnaps Siamese,...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/19

This is your News You do not Need podcast.Picture this: I'm lounging on my couch, scrolling through the news like any normal person avoiding holiday shopping chaos, when bam—there's a video of an Amazon driver in Lakewood, California, straight-up kidnapping a cat. Not just any cat, mind you, but Piper, a six-year-old Siamese who's been ruling her family's front lawn like a furry monarch for years. The driver pulls up, package in hand, spots Piper chilling there, and instead of delivering the goods,

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1:43

Robotaxi Roulette: Mystery Man in the Trunk Has Cops...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/17

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So there I was, minding my own business on a Tuesday night, scrolling through the news like any normal person avoiding real responsibilities, when I stumble on this headline that made me spit out my coffee: a woman orders a Waymo self-driving cab, pops open the trunk to toss in her groceries, and bam—there's a full-grown man trapped inside, looking like he just lost a wrestling match with a pretzel factory. This went viral faster than a cat video, and cops

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3:31

Neighborhood Holds Funeral for Pothole... and It...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/15

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So, you know how the internet is full of important headlines like “global crisis” and “historic summit” and “please stop putting cheese in your car’s engine”? This is not one of those stories. This is the exact opposite. This is a story no one needs, and yet here we are, together, about to put it directly into your brain.In the past day, while normal humans were doing sensible things, a group of very determined people in England held a funeral for… a

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2:02

Kiwi Cops Foil $19K Fabergé Heist: Suspect's 6-Day...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/14

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So there I was, minding my own business in New Zealand, window-shopping for some bling when I spot this shiny Fabergé pendant straight out of a James Bond flick—$19,000 worth of egg-shaped fabulousness, all sparkly and smug. I think, "Self, you deserve this," and in a move smoother than 007 dodging lasers, I pop it in my mouth and swallow. Gulp. Instant jewelry heist, right? Wrong. Turns out, Auckland cops aren't fans of my gourmet smuggling technique.They

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2:55

DoorDash Driver Spices Up Delivery with Pepper Spray,...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/13

This is your News You do not Need podcast.Let me tell you about a breaking news story you absolutely do not need, but now your brain will insist on keeping forever.Somewhere in Indiana, where the weather is doing its best impression of a refrigerated meat locker at about 35 degrees, a DoorDash driver was caught on a doorbell camera delivering dinner like a normal human… and then lovingly misting the food with pepper spray. Not a garnish, not a drizzle of aioli. Pepper. Spray.The customer, who

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3:40

Hermès Heist: The Case of the Vanishing $200 Bandage...

News You Do Not Need ·

2025/12/12

This is your News You do not Need podcast.So, in the vast carnival of human achievement, today’s standout headline is not about peace, progress, or curing anything. No, it’s about a bandage. A very, very fancy bandage.Hermès, the luxury brand known for selling handbags that cost more than a used car, briefly offered what was essentially a designer Band-Aid: a tiny adhesive strip priced around two hundred dollars, marketed as a “Band-Aid accessory.” Yes, that’s right. Somewhere in Paris, someone

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