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PODCAST

Recovery Daily Podcast

Rachel (Miller) Abbassi

Recovery Daily Podcast is hosted by Rachel (Miller) Abbassi, a recovering alcoholic and stroke survivor. With 9 years of sobriety, Rachel regressed into severe post-stroke chronic daily migraines, vision impairment due to vestibular disorder, and mild vascular neurocognitive disorder. The first episode starts only days after recognizing that she must start her journey of rehabilitation again and pull herself away from a career she loves. She believes that the greatest healing comes from sharing her

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All Episodes

00:40:40

Wisdom From Experience: Afraid To Jump

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/12/03

I’m still trying to figure out where I’m going, no longer having that next title or promotion to chase anymore. My old goals were always stacked against the outside world or next rung on the ladder. Now my goals are internal, rooted in who I’m becoming, not what I’m earning. I’ve created a career from my recovery experiences. I’m building my life by taking my peer recovery course, recording my podcast, shifting into a life where my growth is inwardly deeper.Talking about my alcoholism, stroke,

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00:35:10

Serenity vs Tranquility: Beneath the Noise

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/12/02

What is the difference between serenity and tranquility? I used to search for peace and quiet because it was so loud inside my head. I searched externally, occasionally stumbling upon a babbling brook or wave-blanketed shoreline. I had no understanding of internal peace. In fact, I remember the first day I felt it at age forty-three (one year into sobriety). Serenity was uncovered within me, exposed underneath the pain and fear released from my “dark place” through working the twelve steps. The

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00:32:12

Perspective: Intentionally Leaving Things Out

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/26

Today I’ve been thinking about perspective, exploring that what we leave out of our lives opens space and time to see what we previously couldn’t. Recovery progressively widens perspective. I was the thing missing from my own life for many years. It truly felt like seeing the world for the first time in some of those early days in sobriety. Before recovery, my life was overcrowded and now its simplicity allows me to act with intention.I’ve picked up painting in stroke recovery which teaches me to

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00:34:51

Catastrophizing & Cussing: How Small Tasks Become...

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/21

I cursed twice this week, and that’s rare for me. I remember when those feelings would trigger me to escape life when I got overwhelmed. I tried to track down the title to my old car yesterday. The paperwork never got processed correctly because of the chaos around my stroke in 2021. The task instantly became a catastrophic, impossible situation yesterday. Before I even took a simple step, I had blown it into a full-scale mental war. I was convinced it would be a DMV nightmare like the one I went

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00:18:07

Pushing My Limits: Week One of Peer Support Training

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/20

I’m taking a 60-hour Peer Recovery Support training course which I’m super excited about. I was nervous about whether I could handle it physically, but the instructor reassured me he could accommodate my disability so that I don’t have to look at the screen. What I didn’t anticipate is the extreme cognitive fatigue as well. I constantly over-estimate my capabilities post-stroke.I slept 11 hours the past two nights after class. It runs all day on Mondays and Tuesdays, and a half day on Fridays. I’ve

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00:20:58

Right-Sizing Myself: Humility And Accepting Compliments

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/15

Humility and humiliation are tangled up for me. Practicing healthy thinking when you’re “in the wild” is complicated: “right-sizing myself” vs shrinking myself. It feels safer to live in self-inflicted unworthiness than to risk vulnerability. However, it reinforces my old mindset that pain is inevitable, and I deserve it.Pain, shame, and humiliation are human experiences and reactions based on trauma, history, fear, expectations, and emotional vulnerability. Once we’re emotionally aware, we choose

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00:22:14

The Truth Beneath Judgment: A Peak Under The Covers

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/14

Comparing myself to others without realizing it is one of my character defects. When I judge someone, it feels like I’m trying to pull the covers off them to expose some hidden truth, but really, I’m pulling the covers over myself to hide my own insecurities. My instinct to judge comes from an inferiority complex. I’m bracing myself for imagined failure. A lifetime of experiences set me up to predetermine how interactions with people will go and my mind projects my lack of self-esteem onto them

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00:14:02

Seeing Life Through a New Lens: When Fear Loosens Its...

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/12

After my stroke and medical retirement, I see life from a different perspective. One morning, I noticed half-turned fall leaves still attached to a tree, green shifting into fall colors. I’d seen them countless times before but never looked at them the way I did that day. The beauty had always been there, but life blurred my view. Sobriety brought the same shift in perspective. As fear loosens its grip and acceptance of life as it is comes in to focus, gratitude and beauty does too. This is what I

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00:27:30

The Morning Drink: I Was Silencing Life

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/11

I was afraid of everything for as long as I remember. Late in my drinking career, I woke up with a racing mind and pounding chest, terrified of the day and convinced I needed a drink to relieve the fear. My anxiety was a constant hum beneath my skin. Chardonnay was my solution that quieted the chaos. When I discovered the morning drink, it felt like a breakthrough to steady my trembling morning hands, quiet my ill stomach, and silence the panic attacks. I was constructing my prison. Each drink that

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00:30:27

Willing to Change: Noticing Our Hidden Character Defects

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/08

Change starts with willingness to let go of what no longer serves who we’re becoming. My character defects are hidden in plain sight, showing up whenever I am disturbed, frustrated, stressed, or hurt. Each inner disturbance is a cue for change. I’ve noticed that a character defect is always quietly steering my fear, pride, envy, or self-centeredness. Step 6 is a lesson in self-awareness to recognize those defects and find the willingness to release them instead of letting them define who I am.That

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00:30:43

Tripping Over the Past: Escape the Thinking Spiral

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/06

My obsessive thinking can either defeat me or drive me. My overactive empathizer has been feeling like a burden and handicap lately. After hearing terrible news my thoughts spiral into a very dark place if I don’t make a cognizant effort to distract myself. I was encouraged today that my intensity is a superpower that I use to help others. The trouble is that it can also trap me if I don’t ground myself in the present. I must pause and redirect toward something purposeful rather than attempting to

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00:22:00

Belonging: A Journey Out of Isolation

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/04

Feeling isolated has been a thread running through my life. Upon reflection in early sobriety, I believed I was choosing isolation, but I realized this morning that I had felt isolated by the world, as if life had chosen to leave me out. That early victim mindset began thinking patterns that fueled my addiction. I’ve often heard in recovery that alcohol made folks finally feel like they belonged. That wasn’t the case for me. Alcohol made me care less about not belonging. Decades later, the more I

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00:21:33

The Ping-Pong Effect: Lesson’s Learned About...

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/11/02

Today I went to a virtual workshop held by the Serenity House of Leesburg. It was called “Surfing the Wave: How to manage urges and strong emotions in recovery.” I focused on my emotional urges. The workshop helped me see that some of my old alcoholic thinking still lingers in subtle ways. When I hear about tragedy, I tend to sink into sadness and imagine the person’s suffering as if it were my own. I used to think that was empathy, but it’s really a form of isolation that feeds my depression. The

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00:27:29

The Ability To Grieve: Mourning Vs. Grieving

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/10/30

For most of my life, I mourned the loss of a friend who died in a motorcycle accident the year I graduated high school. I thought I was grieving, but I was stuck in the shadows of that loss for a very long time. I cried without processing anything. I didn’t truly grieve his death until I got sober at 42. As a teenager, I was already hormonally irrational; add alcohol, and it tipped me into chaos. Drinking kept me numb enough to avoid the full weight of loss, yet clear enough to sit in the misery of

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00:21:36

Savoring Stillness: The Beauty in Moving Slowly

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/10/29

Slowing down has been a gift of my stroke recovery, and I learned it through sobriety. I used to move so fast that I never noticed much around me other than that which I was trying to change. I miss moving fast because slowing down isn’t optional anymore. It’s necessary for my recovery and to minimize my daily head pain. But, through the stillness and quiet, I’ve learned to savor it, being fully present in moments that used to slip by me. Emotional sobriety taught me how to know my limitations

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00:33:33

Wide Awake: Spiritual Awakening In Progress

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/10/28

A spiritual awakening sounded a bit over the top to me when I heard folks talk about it in meetings. I didn’t really understand spirituality much less what an awakening was. But I’m sure I’m experiencing it. It feels like a gradual unfolding of reality, trust, honesty, hope, and faith. All the while I’m learning more about who I am and my connection to each of you and the world around me. Lessons learned from my memories transcend the regret of the past. There are times in life when I have no choice

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00:18:33

Emotions Ignite Change: Desperation, Fear, and Hope

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/10/25

Logic didn’t get me sober or compel me to make major changes in my life. I knew alcohol was destroying me long before I stopped drinking, but that knowledge wasn’t enough. I had to feel desperate. Every transformation in my life has started with an intense emotional spark. Change has always been ignited by pain, fear, guilt, or even hope. Messy, humbling emotions propel me if I allow them to. It starts with acknowledging what I feel and letting it push me toward action. When I name the emotion

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00:25:14

Honesty Starts Within: Motives, Fears, and Excuses

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/10/24

I thought honesty was just not lying to other people, but I’ve learned that it starts within. When I got sober, I could see the hiding and breaking promises, but I couldn’t see the lies I was telling myself. I began to look at my motives, fears, and excuses throughout the day. I had to stop justifying my behavior and pretending I was fine when I wasn’t. Honesty requires presence. I can’t be honest about what’s happening right now if I’m stuck in yesterday or tomorrow. I need a constant check-in with

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00:41:32

Everything Is OK Right Now: Finding Peace in the Present

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/10/22

When I live in the present, life is simpler with less chaos, less noise, and less drama. In sobriety, that serenity comes from acceptance, willingness, and facing my fears. It’s doing the next right thing even when I don’t feel like it. That same mindset carries me through stroke recovery and life with chronic pain and vestibular disorder. Both require daily acceptance, balance, and the courage to live in what is, not what was or might be.Growth only happens in the present moment. When I’m in my

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00:24:50

Defining Myself: Who Am I, Really?

Recovery Daily Podcast ·

2025/10/21

“How do you define yourself?” This question was posed yesterday in my first church attendance in years. I realized that I define myself by my limitations. I’m an alcoholic, I’m disabled, and I’m medically retired. But that’s not really who I am. I’m a woman with an endless passion in my pursuit of growth, joy, and serenity. I am changing my paralyzing self-pity and anxiety into action. Some days it feels like pulling out of a tailspin. Some days I’m fighting gravity just to sit up in bed. In

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