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PODCAST

Behind the Therapy Door

Sarah Thome and Matthew Gallagher

Have you ever wondered what your therapist is really thinking? Hopefully they are open and tell you and in this podcast two licensed mental health therapists share candid descriptions of the therapeutic process, theories of personality, communication, relationships, and self-help strategies to help you live your best life. Join the Affinity Consultants (Sarah and Matt) for a humorous and educational peek behind the therapy door.

health & fitness mental health

All Episodes

47:45

Episode 30: Holidays with Cousin Eddie

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/11/23

Most people have a love/hate relationship with the holiday season, depending on lived experience. We here at Affinity Consultants have much to be grateful for during this holiday season of 2025. Tune in as we reflect on a season of growth, both personally and professionally, and recount many moments of gratitude, both big and small. But do not worry…there will be plenty of humorous WTF’s along the way! theaffinityconsultants.com

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50:17

Episode 29: Leading Healthy Teams

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/11/16

Much has been written about and researched regarding effective leadership. The reality is, however, that effective leadership is more about each member of the team and how they impact the whole. Healthy leadership prioritizes a foundation of trust, proactively navigates conflict, encourages commitment and accountability, and utilizes tools to empower and mobilize action, creativity, and curiosity. Affinity Consultations enjoys opportunities to help leadership, in both large ...

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57:44

Episode 28: Fear is the Little Death…

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/11/09

Fear often gets a bad rap as a toxic and negative emotion that serves little purpose. While it is true that fear can be corrosive when unprocessed and unchecked, it can also serve as a powerful motivator for facing challenges, growing confidence, and rewiring the nervous system. We investigate how fear can hijack each type of personality, using Process Communication Model as a framework, as well as healthy ways to meet our psychological needs and turn fear into potential for self-...

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42:47

Episode 27: What's it Like to Live with a Therapist?

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/11/02

We have a fun episode in store today! Ever wonder what it is like to be married to a therapist and live with day in and day out access to know-it-alls, ahem…advice and communication tools galore? We had the pleasure of sitting down with our spouses (AKA very good sports) in the lovely town of Hermann, MO, to interview them on what it is like living with a therapist, what is helpful, what might be annoying, and how it has impacted the relationship. Scott and Lori provide a healthy ...

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53:13

Episode 26: Conflict, not Drama

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/10/20

Conflict is inevitable, as much as we do not like it or want it near us. It exists in all relationships and situations and can often serve as a powerful lesson in compromise, healthy communication, self-empowerment, etc. Conflict is not the same as drama, however, and it is important to be able to distinguish the two from one another. Today we explore Stephen Karpman’s Drama Triangle, the 3 roles that comprise the triangle, and healthy ways out of drama and into negotiating ...

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51:16

Episode 25: Relationship Fallacies Part 2

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/10/05

We are back for Part 2 of Relationship Fallacies this week and unpacking more myths that exist in partnerships. It is easy to get caught up in so many of these myths, as they have become a part of the social vernacular. However, as seasoned therapists, we are trained to deconstruct the narrative and rework it in healthier and more compromising ways to help clients live their best lives. Help us help you and tune in! theaffinityconsultants.com

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51:51

Episode 24: Depression

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/09/28

Disruptions in mood can be a common occurrence and often a confusing one. Depression is a condition that impacts people of all walks of life and ages and can take many twists in turns. The heaviness and fog often connected to periods of depression can make even mundane tasks seem extraordinarily hard. In today’s episode, we talk through mild symptoms of depression up to more serious symptoms, how to discern the difference, and strategies to utilize to break out of the fog and retu...

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44:34

Episode 23: Relationship Fallacies Part 1

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/09/20

There are too many relationship myths to count, but they all have something in common…false information based off assumptions. You know what they say when we assume? It makes an ass out of u and me! Follow along in today’s episode as we unpack common relationship myths, how they can be destructive, and the healthier options required for meaningful communication and connection. theaffinityconsultants.com

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50:37

Episode 22: Guest Wendy Hummell, Retired Detective...

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/09/13

What is there not to say about our 1st guest on Behind the Therapy Door? We could go on and on, but suffice it to say, Wendy Hummel is a powerhouse of compassion, a change agent, and our friend. She is a retired detective that has been through the trenches, all while raising a family, going through several education programs, becoming a certified yoga instructor, etc. Wendy is a thought leader that is passionate about the 1st responder community and motivated to insure all have th...

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51:19

Episode 21: The Art of Compromise

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/09/09

You know that phrase, “It’s not all about you!”? Welcome to the Art of Compromise! When working through dilemmas that involve another person, it cannot just be our way or their way. Most often, the best strategy is finding a way for both to come to the negotiating table in an open and curious position and work together. In today’s episode, we unpack tips and tricks for healthy listening, fair fighting, and working towards a mutual goal that lets everyone win. theaffini...

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52:28

Episode 20: Anxiety, Join the Club!

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/09/01

Anxiety is a universal condition and one we can all relate to at different points in our lives. Learning how to recognize the early signs of somatic distress and the emotional signals of anxiety can often empower us to decrease its vice grip-like hold on us. Tune in as we discuss common symptoms of anxiety and panic, how to discern when it is stress vs. something more serious, and hands on tools to lower anxiety and return to a neutral or calm state. theaffinityconsultants....

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48:39

Episode 19: Bonding is For Babies (Phase Issues)

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/08/24

Action oriented and charming Promoter Types are so incidence focused that they can leave others in the dust when in Phase distress. The thought of slowing down, asking for help, and showing their soft underbelly is synonymous with kryptonite. However, when directed to lean into their vulnerability, the natural courage of Promoter change agents can shine through and lead to even greater excitement in their relationships, at work, and in future goal setting. Join us as we unpa...

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49:37

Episode 18: Grow up Already (Stages of Development)

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/08/18

In this week’s episode, we unpack the developmental stages first written about by Erik Erikson. These stages are ones we all go through, regardless of personality type, and span the entire age spectrum. Each stage poses an internal struggle that must be mastered in order to develop the accompanying virtue that waits as the pot of gold at the end of the journey. The stages, once mastered, culminate in a saturation of wisdom in our golden years, offering deep compassion and pe...

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47:13

Episode 17: Finding and Owning your Power (Phase Issues)

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/08/11

The natural “chill” that Imaginer Types possess can become their very downfall, if trapped in phase distress Though the calm nature of an Imaginer Type is something novelists write about, it can also morph into passive withdrawal and isolation when intense distress is heaped on. Imaginer Type’s can become overwhelmed with too much stimulation or too many expectations to achieve or perform and become paralyzed with powerlessness. In order to move through phase distress, Imagi...

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48:52

Episode 16: It’s fine, everything’s fine… (Phase Issue)

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/08/03

The quest for efficiency and order is life blood for Thinker Types. In efforts to avoid negative emotions or acknowledgement of loss or perceived failure, Thinker Type personalities can become frustrated and attempt to control self and others. When in distress, this control can be administered with criticism and an exaggerated aversion to drama or time waste. On the flip side, their rich focus on data and logic can be a powerhouse in getting plans made and the outcome accomp...

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53:04

Episode 15: The Illusion of Control

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/07/17

What is it we all want and can never attain long term? Control…that is why it is an illusion! Taking permanent control over life is like grabbing a fistfull of air…impossible! In this episode, we discuss the various ways different personality types try to maintain control to manage uncomfortable emotions. We unpack different strategies for leaning into the “Both/And” concept to work towards controlling the things we can in healthy ways, while also embracing flexibility...

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42:40

Episode 14: It’s not my fault…

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/07/06

Who doesn’t love the ornery attitude and spontaneous creativity of a rebel mindset? People on the end of the angry blame game, that’s who! In this episode, we explore the pit-falls of phase distress in Rebel Type personalities. For those struggling with angry blame, tune in for some tips to explore patterns of self-doubt and inappropriate delegation, that can lead to self-sabotage via emotional escalation and avoidance. Learning how to confront healthy guilt via saying...

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46:44

Episode 13: Opposites Attract?

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/06/23

Remember that old adage, “opposites attract?” Well what about “birds of a feather flock together?” There is truth to both of these famous phrases and in this episode, we unpack how to thrive in relationships with our polar opposites, as well as how to deepen connections with our dopplegangers. It is all about balancing strengths and needs in partnerships, celebrating differences, and finding commonalities, all which allows us to course correct miscommunication patterns and p...

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31:47

Episode 12: I’m Not Afraid, You’re Afraid

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/06/15

Trust can be tricky, especially for Persister Type personalities in distress. Learning how to let others do their part, not feel responsibility for their success or failure, and confront our very real feelings of fear and mistrust can at times feel like wrestling an alligator in murky water. For some, it is easier to express anger and intense disapproval, but that just gets us more of the same…mistrust and conflict. Deliberately turning towards the fear and anxiety of not having t...

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42:36

Episode 11: Blindspots and Cognitive Distortions

Behind the Therapy Door ·

2025/06/09

Blindspots are everywhere and we all got ‘em! These cognitive distortions, which are irrational thoughts that shape our perceptions and emotions, often lurk below our conscious awareness and can wreak havoc on our self-worth and on our relationships. Good news is that we can grow our awareness of them, when we are engaging in them, and back out of them with proactive self-care and communication. Asking trusted partners, friends, family members, and colleagues to bring them t...

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