Healed-ish

01:01:40

97. Dear Daddy God.... (Hannah Beck's Story)

Healed-ish ·

2026/10/06

Comedian Hannah Beck joins me to unpack the lore behind her viral “Dear Daddy God” series, where she reads entries from her extremely religious childhood journals. From judging her friends for watching Glee (while watching it herself for “research”) to practicing kissing with her best friend for their future husbands, who she later realized was absolutely her crush, we’re getting the stories behind the journals. Hannah also shares how her parents joined a strict religious denomination and how it

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01:20:31

96. Gold Dust, Healings & Bad Evidence: Finger of God...

Healed-ish ·

2026/10/02

This documentary literally helped convince me to go to Bethel. 😂 Finger of God follows filmmaker Darren Wilson as he searches for evidence that God is still performing supernatural miracles today. This includes healings, gold dust and gold teeth.At the time, Anna and I were completely captivated by it. So, years later and on the other side of deconstruction, we decided to watch it again. We’re revisiting the miracle claims, the “evidence” we once found convincing, and all the things we somehow

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00:49:10

95. Faith Over Family: Escaping Jehovah’s Witnesses:...

Healed-ish ·

2026/09/29

CW: Conversion therapy, homophobia, suicidal ideation, religious abuseBen was raised as a Jehovah’s Witness, where strict rules, purity culture, and the threat of shunning shaped his life. After coming to terms with being gay, he was forced into a “study” that turned into conversion therapy and ultimately found himself homeless and without the support of his family. Today, his parents have cut contact because of their faith,

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01:19:37

94. Faith Over Family: Escaping Jehovah’s Witnesses:...

Healed-ish ·

2026/09/29

CW: Conversion therapy, homophobia, suicidal ideation, religious abuseBen was raised as a Jehovah’s Witness, where strict rules, purity culture, and the threat of shunning shaped his life. After coming to terms with being gay, he was forced into a “study” that turned into conversion therapy and ultimately found himself homeless and without the support of his family. Today, his parents have cut contact because of their faith, but Ben has built a beautiful life on the other side. He shares his journey

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01:21:05

93. Inside Campus Crusade for Christ: Cru (Rachel’s...

Healed-ish ·

2026/09/22

Rachel didn't grow up religious, but after being introduced to church through a friend, Christianity eventually became her entire world. In college, she joined Campus Crusade for Christ (now Cru) and ultimately turned ministry into a full-time career. Rachel shares the cracks she began to see from the inside, why the organization started to feel increasingly culty, and the deconstruction that followed. Today, Rachel (@psychedwithrachel) is a licensed therapist in Pasadena, California

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00:52:08

92. Captivating: Cringe Book Club

Healed-ish ·

2026/09/18

Cringe Book Club has officially arrived to Healed-ish! If you’ve seen the series on my TikTok, you know where this is going: we’re revisiting the Christian books that shaped how many of us thought about faith, relationships, gender, sex, and ourselves, and asking... what exactly were we reading?!Abigail & I are kicking things off with Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge, the bestselling Christian book that taught a generation of women that our deepest desires are to be romanced, play an

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01:18:42

91. Growing up Seventh-Day Adventist (Melissa Duge...

Healed-ish ·

2026/09/15

Melissa Duge Spiers grew up Seventh-day Adventist in a world shaped by strict rules, purity culture, and expectations of what it meant to be a good Christian woman. We talk about Ellen G. White and the beginnings of the Seventh-day Adventist Church, Melissa’s rebellion and eventual separation from her upbringing, and the devastating truth she later learned about her father. Melissa is the author of Holy Disobedience, a memoir about breaking free from harmful religious expectations and finding

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01:18:58

90. Youth Camps & Megachurches (Ellie's Story)

Healed-ish ·

2026/09/08

Youth camp was Ellie’s happy place. She made memories with friends, had powerful emotional experiences, and led worship. But after getting involved in a megachurch, she began seeing what happened behind the scenes and what happened when she started asking honest questions. Ellie shares her journey from church camps and megachurch culture to leaving, deconstructing, finding freedom, and healing out loud online. @Ellieunbound-Ellie’s Tiktok: ⁠ / ellieunbound⁠ Ellie’s IG:

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01:07:34

89. Mica Miller & the Death of the Pastor's Wife

Healed-ish ·

2026/09/04

CW: Domestic Violence, Sexual Abuse, and Discussion of SuicideAfter many requests to talk about Mica Miller's story and Netflix's Death of the Pastor's Wife, Rihanna (@thediaryofrihanna) joins me to unpack the case and the troubling dynamics surrounding Mica's marriage to pastor JP Miller. With a significant age gap, domestic violence and religious abuse, and the fact that JP was once Mica's youth pastor, there are parts of her story that hit incredibly close to home for me.We

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01:20:10

88. Conversion Therapy Dropout (Timothy Schraeder...

Healed-ish ·

2026/09/01

Timothy Schraeder Rodriguez had a passion for ministry, but after a trusted youth pastor discovered his internet search history, he was shamed and forced to leave his church. Desperate to change his sexuality, Timothy dove headfirst into conversion therapy through Exodus International, learning how to “act straight” and searching for the supposed wound that made him gay.He also shares what it was like working with major ministries like Hillsong, where his talents were welcomed as long as his

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01:13:43

87. How Church Taught Us to Distrust Our Bodies with...

Healed-ish ·

2026/08/28

What happens when you've been taught not to trust your own body? Somatic therapist Samantha (@spiritualembodiment) joins me to explore how purity culture, charismatic Christianity, and harmful messages about our bodies can disconnect us from ourselves. We discuss body shame, eating disorders, spiritual performance, and practical steps toward healing and learning to trust your body again.-Samantha's website:https://www.samantharedondotherapy.com/Free discovery

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01:26:02

86. Rapture Anxiety, the Pressure to Be Pure &...

Healed-ish ·

2026/08/25

Rebecca grew up afraid of hell, the rapture, and stepping outside of God’s plan. From the pressure to remain pure to a pastor refusing to marry her after she “fell into sin,” shame shaped some of her biggest life decisions. Years later, she discovered the Christian man she trusted had been living a double life that put her and her children in an unsafe situation.We talk about purity, charismatic Christianity, deconstruction, and Rebecca’s journey to untangle what she was taught from what she

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00:54:14

85. Church, Hollywood & Reclaiming Intuition: Part 2...

Healed-ish ·

2026/08/18

Part 2 of 2CW: sexual assaultKatie Stone spent her teenage years trying to be the perfect Christian girl, learning to cover herself up, follow the rules, and trust spiritual authority over her own intuition. After leaving the church and pursuing her dreams in Hollywood, she found that the two worlds weren’t always as different as they seemed. As she explored her sexuality and eventually became a burlesque dancer, Katie also found herself caught in a coercive relationship with an older, powerful

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00:59:30

84. Church, Hollywood & Reclaiming Intuition: Part 1...

Healed-ish ·

2026/08/18

Part 1 of 2CW: sexual assaultKatie Stone spent her teenage years trying to be the perfect Christian girl, learning to cover herself up, follow the rules, and trust spiritual authority over her own intuition. After leaving the church and pursuing her dreams in Hollywood, she found that the two worlds weren’t always as different as they seemed. As she explored her sexuality and eventually became a burlesque dancer, Katie also found herself caught in a coercive relationship with an older, powerful

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00:46:01

83. Youth Pastors Gone Wild with Jeremy Steele

Healed-ish ·

2026/08/14

Welcome to the first Friday Drop! Every other Friday, I'll be bringing you conversations, behind-the-scenes stories, and bonus episodes.To kick things off, I'm joined by Jeremy (@skeptic.pastor), a former youth pastor, to swap stories about the absolutely unhinged things that happened in evangelical youth groups. From bizarre games to awkward church culture moments, we revisit the insanity.-Jeremy’s Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@skeptic.pastorJeremy’s IG:

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00:47:58

82. Losing the God I Was Given | The Gardening...

Healed-ish ·

2026/08/11

Part 2 of 2This week, I'm joined by Ciarra, also known as The Gardening Theologian.Raised in a conservative Christian environment, Ciarra learned early to suppress her queer identity and accept the version of God she had been given. But after attending Berkeley, Harvard Divinity School, studying theology, and wrestling with difficult questions, everything changed.In this episode, we talk about liberation theology, queer identity, white supremacy in the church, and what it looks like to rebuild

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01:11:35

81. Losing the God I Was Given | The Gardening...

Healed-ish ·

2026/08/11

Part 1 of 2This week, I'm joined by Ciarra, also known as The Gardening Theologian.Raised in a conservative Christian environment, Ciarra learned early to suppress her queer identity and accept the version of God she had been given. But after attending Berkeley, Harvard Divinity School, studying theology, and wrestling with difficult questions, everything changed.In this episode, we talk about liberation theology, queer identity, white supremacy in the church, and what it looks like to rebuild

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01:23:35

80. YWAM, the Smartphone Prophet, and Bizarre Acts of...

Healed-ish ·

2026/08/04

After taking a break from college, Hannah joined Youth With A Mission (YWAM), where she immersed herself in charismatic Christianity. In this episode, she shares what that environment was actually like. Speaking in tongues, faith healing, evangelism, and pressure to prove your faith through increasingly bizarre acts ... .including the time someone spit in her eyes in an attempt to heal her eyesight.Later, Hannah joined Shawn Bolz's church, Expression58. l Looking back, she reflects on prophetic

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01:23:04

79. From Amish to Bethel School of Supernatural...

Healed-ish ·

2026/07/28

Jeff was raised in an Amish household before his family joined the Mennonite church. Years later, he found himself at Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry, hoping for a different kind of faith. Instead, his time there became the beginning of his deconstruction and his journey toward accepting himself.We talk about purity culture, being gay in conservative Christianity, Bethel, and the unexpected path that led him to healing-Jeffrey’s Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jeffreygingerichJeffrey’s IG:

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01:14:40

78. The Voice, Deconstruction & Coming Out After...

Healed-ish ·

2026/07/21

Jordan Rainer (The Voice, Team Reba) joins me to share her journey from Southern Baptist purity culture to deconstruction. We talk about suppressing feelings, navigating a difficult marriage shaped by church advice, choosing divorce, coming out, and rebuilding relationships after leaving her faith. She also shares how she is telling her story through her newest music.-Jordan’s Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thejordanrainerJordan’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/thejordanrainerJordan Rainer’s Newest

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