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PODCAST

The Complex Trauma Podcast

A podcast for anyone healing from complex PTSD, childhood emotional neglect, and the patterns you"ve been carrying without knowing what to call them.Hosted by EMDR and somatic trauma therapist Sarah Herstich, each episode gets into nervous system healing, trauma responses, and what it actually takes to stop living in survival mode.If you"ve spent years people-pleasing, apologizing for existing, or holding it together on the outside while unraveling on the inside, this is for you.We talk about the

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All Episodes

33:10

Is It a Part or Is It Dissociation? OSDD, DID, and CPTSD

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/10/07

Everyone has parts. So how do you know when a part is just a part of you, and when it's crossed into a dissociative disorder like OSDD or DID? This episode came from a listener healing from CPTSD who just found out she has a dissociative disorder. She asked two questions a lot of trauma survivors are carrying. How common are dissociative disorders in trauma survivors? And with parts work like IFS so popular right now, where's the line between ordinary parts and dissociation? So we're walking ...

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25:43

Why Do I Want Two Opposite Things? Conflicting Parts...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/09/30

Why can you feel lonely and then want everyone to leave you alone, or set a boundary and immediately want to take it back? Today, I explore why conflicting parts and contradictory responses can feel especially intense after complex trauma, drawing from parts work, attachment research, fear learning, and Somatic Experiencing. You’ll hear why missing someone doesn’t mean the relationship was safe, why guilt doesn’t prove a boundary was wrong, and how the body can move toward something while als...

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42:02

Grieving What You Never Had After Emotional Neglect

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/09/23

How do you grieve a childhood you never had? If you grew up with childhood emotional neglect, you may have heard that grief is part of complex trauma recovery and still have no idea what you're supposed to be grieving, or what that grief is supposed to feel like. This episode is built around a listener's question. She grew up without much affection, remembers wanting it, and came to believe that needing it meant she wasn't growing up properly. Decades later, she's wondering whether she has an...

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45:13

How Narcissistic Abuse Shapes Self-Trust,...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/09/16

What happens when you grow up learning that someone else’s needs, emotions, or version of reality matter more than your own? In this episode, I’m joined by Amy Marlow-MaCoy, MEd, LPC, to talk about narcissistic abuse and its relationship to complex trauma. We unpack narcissistic family systems, gaslighting and DARVO, the roles children can take on in these families, and why survivors may struggle with self-trust, perfectionism, overfunctioning, guilt, and boundaries long after childhood. We a...

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28:31

Functional Freeze and Why You Feel Stuck Even When...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/09/09

You’re functioning. You may even be the person everyone relies on. But inside, you feel stuck, distant, or like you aren’t fully there for your own life. In this episode, I'm answering a listener’s question: Is functional freeze actually real, or is it something the internet picked up and oversimplified? We explore what trauma clinicians mean by functional freeze, why it isn’t a formal diagnosis, and how mixed patterns of activation and shutdown can make you look capable while everything insi...

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24:09

The Longing to Be Understood in Complex Trauma Recovery

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/09/02

You finally understand something about yourself. Something that took months of therapy to even name. And now you need someone else to get it too. This week we're talking about that longing, where it comes from, why it can feel so urgent with certain people, and what happens in your body when the conversation doesn't go the way you hoped. We'll cover emotional flashbacks, the fight flight freeze fawn response, and the difference between being understood and being agreed with. Plus, what's actu...

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39:52

Complex Trauma, Brain Fog, Memory & Focus Problems

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/08/26

Why can you handle a crisis without blinking but completely blank when someone asks what you want for dinner? Brain fog, forgetfulness, trouble focusing, difficulty starting tasks, and executive dysfunction can all show up alongside complex trauma. But “trauma changed your brain” is a much more complicated story than the internet often makes it sound. In this episode of The Complex Trauma Podcast, we’re breaking down what may actually be happening when your brain feels scattered, slow, forget...

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24:48

Why Trauma Memory Gaps Don't Mean You Made It Up

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/08/19

Maybe you barely remember your childhood. Maybe you've done years of trauma work, you're finally feeling better, and now you're wondering, was it really that bad? Did I make it all up? This episode is about trauma, memory, and self-trust. Why memory isn't a recording, why gaps and fragments don't prove or disprove anything, why healing itself can create distance from a memory, and why I don't remember doesn't have to become I can't trust myself. You don't have to make yourself hurt agai...

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14:58

The Messy Middle of Nervous System Regulation

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/08/12

This week's episode is a little different. Instead of something super polished, I'm giving you the real time version of my own messy middle. What dysregulation actually feels like in my body right now, why regulation isn't the absence of activation, and what's actually helping me stay steady in a hard season of my life, from a walk around the block to finally asking for help. If you're a complex trauma survivor in your own hard season, this one's for you. It's okay to lower a standard, ...

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35:33

Why Relationships and Connection Feel So Hard After...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/08/05

Why does connection feel so hard after complex trauma? You want closeness, but when someone gets too close, you pull away. You want support, but "I'm fine" comes out before you've even thought about it. You want to trust people, yet asking for help, receiving kindness, or staying present during conflict can feel surprisingly difficult. If you've ever wondered why relationships feel so complicated after childhood trauma or emotional neglect, this episode is for you. Today, we're exploring how ...

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65:04

The Impact of Emotionally Immature Parents with...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/07/29

What is the real impact of growing up with emotionally immature parents? Dr. Lindsay Gibson, author of the bestselling Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, joins the show to explain what it costs a child over decades, and how to parent differently. In this conversation, we get into: What actually makes a parent emotionally immatureWhy the love can be real and the harm can be real at the same timeWhat this can cost a child over years, including a shaken sense of trust in their own p...

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35:08

Why You Don't Know Who You Are After Complex Trauma

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/07/22

If you've ever caught yourself wondering who you actually are underneath the anxiety, the people pleasing, or the version of you that shows up to keep everyone else comfortable, this episode is for you. I break down what a sense of self actually is, why complex trauma gets in the way of building one, and what it looks like to start forming it now, as an adult. That means looking at three capacities trauma tends to disrupt: knowing yourself, expressing yourself, and experiencing yourself, and ...

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27:37

When Perfectionism Takes the Joy Out of the Things...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/07/15

Sometimes a hobby amplifies whatever relationship your nervous system has with uncertainty. If you've ever found yourself staring at a blank page, putting off a creative project, or feeling tense doing something that's supposed to be relaxing, this episode is for you. Today we're exploring why perfectionism can turn creativity into a performance, how complex trauma changes our relationship with uncertainty, and why your hobbies may feel more like a test than a source of joy. We'll talk about ...

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33:02

Somatic Therapy 101: The Nervous System Basics Behind...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/07/08

If you've ever wondered why insight alone hasn't been enough to heal your trauma, this episode is your answer. We're going all the way back to fundamentals with a real somatic therapy 101, covering what somatic therapy actually is, how the nervous system holds onto trauma, and why healing from CPTSD requires more than just understanding your story. In this episode, we cover: Why trauma is a biological response, not just a psychological one (and what that means for your healing)The actual defi...

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18:53

Why Your Nervous System Craves Certainty (And Why It...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/07/01

Ever been called controlling? Too rigid? Too much? On today's episode I breaks down why it was maybe never about control. Your nervous system has maybe been trying to answer one question this whole time: am I safe? This episode covers the real reason behind reassurance seeking, perfectionism, hypervigilance, overthinking, and food rules, and why none of it is a character flaw. Using research on predictive processing and a concept called precision weighting from EMDR therapist Thomas Zimmerman...

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36:33

Emotional Flashbacks in Complex Trauma Explained

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/06/24

Emotional flashbacks are one of the most common and most misunderstood experiences in complex trauma. Unlike visual flashbacks, they don't come with images or a clear memory. They arrive as intense feelings, shame, fear, loneliness, helplessness, often with no story attached and no warning. In this episode, Sarah breaks down what emotional flashbacks actually are. You'll learn why insight alone doesn't change the nervous system's predictions, what's happening in your body when each survival p...

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20:57

Complex Trauma and the Belief That You're a Burden

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/06/17

Do you feel guilty every time you need something, even from people who love you? Do you find it easy to show up for everyone else but nearly impossible to let someone show up for you? If so, this episode is for you. In episode 135, I explore the belief that you are a burden. Not as a passing thought, but as a felt sense in the body that gets activated the moment you need something from another person. I break down where this pattern might come from developmentally, how it shows up differently...

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29:10

Why Complex Trauma Survivors Struggle to Believe...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/06/10

Many complex trauma survivors struggle to trust their memories, emotions, perceptions, and reactions. In this episode, we're exploring why being disbelieved can feel so painful, how emotional neglect and attachment wounds can teach us to question ourselves, and why trauma often leaves us with fragments of memory instead of a clear narrative. We discuss: • Why not being believed can feel abandoning • How self-doubt becomes a survival strategy • Trauma memory and fragmen...

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31:15

Why Emotional Loneliness Runs So Deep in Complex Trauma

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/06/03

Emotional loneliness is one of the most common and least talked about experiences in complex trauma recovery. It's not about the number of people in your life. It's about whether your nervous system has learned to let them in. And for a lot of survivors, it hasn't. Not because something is permanently wrong with you, but because your nervous system learned some very specific things about connection a long time ago. In this episode, I break down some of the neuroscience and nervous system mech...

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32:00

What CPTSD Does to Your Sleep and Why Nothing Else...

The Complex Trauma Podcast ·

2026/05/27

Sleep is one of the most common struggles in the CPTSD community, and one of the least understood. If you've tried the routines, the supplements, the magnesium, the blue light glasses, and you're still lying awake at midnight or waking up at 3am feeling like something is wrong, this episode is for you. Today I break down why sleep is uniquely hard when you have complex trauma, what's actually happening in your nervous system at night, and what might actually help. In this episode: Why s...

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