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PODCAST

It"s Like This Podcast

Life around here? It’s like this. Caregiving, autism, advocacy, midlife. Storytelling, essays, humor, and short fiction. A selected voice-over of my Substack publication. itslikethis.substack.com

society & culture personal journals

All Episodes

7:11

Favorites

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2025/11/15

Here's a braided essay about answering the "favorite" question. Below are a few excerpts, but please go to https://itslikethis.substack.com/p/favorites for the full transcript. Thanks for being here, for reading and/or listening!--My son often assigns colors to people.These labels can change, and we are not sure what they mean, but he always has a response if you ask, “What color is Mommy?”...A few months back, actor Joaquin Phoenix took the “Colbert Questionnaire” on The Late Show with Stephen

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9:22

Read to Me

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2025/10/19

I’ve been having fun writing the newsletter for my local indie bookshop, Atticus Books & Music. In the latest issue, I confessed to my love of the horror genre, as a lifelong Stephen King fan.So in keeping with that theme, let’s start here…I’m sitting at my kitchen table, a crisp new four-inch thick hard cover King novel open in front of me. My second grader is home after school and we are having one of those rare afternoons when we’re not running to one therapy or another.Imagining myself a

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9:43

Right Now, It's Like This

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2025/09/23

If the following seems like a random assortment, welcome to my brain.Please go to https://itslikethis.substack.com/p/right-now-its-like-this for the full transcript. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit itslikethis.substack.com

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6:03

Waiting Game

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2025/06/29

Thoughts on caregiving, the big brutal bill, and a call to save Medicaid, for all of us.Please see the text edition of this newsletter for the full transcript and links, here: https://itslikethis.substack.com/p/waiting-game This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit itslikethis.substack.com

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6:06

On Fixing and Fretting

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2025/05/31

I lost my composure during a guided meditation on equanimity. Yeah. Equanimity—that steadiness of mind and composure in response to any situation?Well, I’m not a skilled meditator. But at least no one else on the call could see or hear me!In this guided session we were prompted to bring to mind someone to whom we could offer phrases of balance and calm. I pictured my son.But with the first prompt—“May you accept things the way they are.”I burst out laughing.This, right here, is one of the top

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6:47

This Story Could've Been Better

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2025/04/15

I wish this story was about an uneventful afternoon a few years ago when my then-teenaged son and I were home alone while my husband was out of town for the weekend. I wish I could tell you my son was watching one of his Pixar movies in the living room and I came down the carpeted stairs with absolutely nothing in my arms, holding the railing carefully, and not losing my footing in the slightest.If I could, I would tell you I walked easily over to where my mostly non-verbal autistic son sat in his

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13:34

History Lessons

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2025/02/21

Please go to itslikethis.substack.com for a full transcript and links.Back in the early days of the pandemic, someone said that one way to protect your mental health when the world outside is off the rails is to find a little corner of your life and control the heck out of it.Straighten a junk drawer, clean out a closet, tend a garden, alphabetize those CDs you still have for some reason.Based on the rate of crazy in the outside world right now, my little household should be immaculate. Not so much

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7:24

Braving the Rain

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2025/01/30

Annapolis, Maryland. 1975-ish. Just after a rain.I was maybe four years old, riding my bike around our dirt driveway in the woods. My training wheels got stuck in the mud and I found myself on a stationary bike, my back wheel spinning an inch above the muck without moving me forward. I felt it begin to rain again, so I pedaled faster. The more I pedaled, the more I was stuck, the harder the rain fell.It wasn’t until I got off and ran inside for help that I saw the truth (to my mother’s dismay, I’m

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2:57

My Post-Election Gratitude Practice

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2024/11/14

They say you can combat negative thoughts and anxiety by cultivating gratitude, so here goes…It’s a good thing my non-verbal autistic son is not aware of politics so I don’t have to explain how we’ve allowed a man who is unfit for office to regain the presidency.It’s a good thing my son can’t vote so he can’t be blamed for electing federal and state representatives who aim to dismantle the programs that we are pretty fond of around here.It’s a good thing my son isn’t a typical young adult so he’s in

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6:32

49. Other

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2024/06/28

The other day, I was completing an online survey to give feedback on a company’s mindfulness and meditation content (in other words, I was ignoring most of their advice and mindlessly procrastinating on my writing and life goals).I hadn’t even reached the actual survey when I hit a snag on the demographic questions leading into it.Are you currently employed?· Yes, full-time· Yes, part-time· No, I’m retired· No, I’m a stay-at-home parent/homemaker· No, I’m a

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7:45

48. Tough Love

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2024/06/11

“Now I’ve been hangin’ around you for daysBut when I lean in, you just turn your head away……I always have to steal my kisses from youAlways have to steal my kisses from you.” —Ben Harper & The Innocent CriminalsThis TikTok video came across my desk and I felt seen.It’s a montage of a guy showering love and kisses on his cat. His cat is not having it.A dozen years ago, when my son was a young teenager, I inadvertently described this cat’s objections to his adorer’s kisses in a

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6:03

47. Sweet Talk

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2024/05/31

My son came into my office early one morning and stood behind me at my desk, spinning his beads over my head. I swiveled around in my desk chair, placed my hand on his belly and scanned his face for his mood. He seemed content. His bed-head indicated a solid sleep.“Good morning, buddy,” I said. “How are you?” Not expecting a response, I was in mid-swivel back to my computer to close out what I was doing when he volleyed a casual, “I’m good.”I laughed in shock, hit with this splash of normalcy that

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4:45

46. Well Met

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2024/05/14

There was a guy at my high school who always dressed in the same blue sweatsuit. No matter the weather, I would see him across the quad, maybe pacing or talking to himself, always in blue. I don’t recall any conversations my friends and I had about him, but somebody dubbed him, “Blueberry.”That’s all I knew about him. I didn’t give him another thought (self-absorbed teenager that I was)—until I found myself in daily negotiations over clean shirts and weather-appropriate clothes with the young man

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9:26

45. April Adventures

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2024/04/16

We’ve seen a lot of Aprils since my son was diagnosed with autism in 2002 — and a lot of conflicting opinions about how best to promote autism awareness, acceptance, and action for Autistic individuals and for their families. I have joined campaigns to celebrate the “ausome” in autism, and to mourn the loss of Autistic children to wandering and drowning. Some years I marched for certain organizations, and in later years spoke out against them. I’ve helped raise money for biomedical research, for

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6:47

44. Snacks by the Sea

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2024/03/21

The town where we’ve spent many spring vacations since my son was little (thanks, Mom & Dad) is overlaid with memories of my kid running on the beach, chasing gulls, splashing in the frigid water, and tossing a ball into the waves to play catch with the ocean.At almost 25 years old, my son seems to have cooled to the idea of a beachside vacation.I’m lucky that he lets me go anyway.As we do on any family vacation, we transfer ourselves to a new locale but try to keep as much the same as possible. I

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7:07

43. A Place at the Table

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2024/01/30

For the full transcript, head to the text version of this post at itslikethis.substack.com/p/43-a-place-at-the-tableI kept apologizing for my kid at a recent family gathering. They put their dogs away for him and we brought his own food and we scooted out early—and, his nervous pacing brought him repeatedly between conversations, and his broad body inadvertently blocked camera angles.Our family kept saying, it’s fine, it’s fine, stop apologizing, he can be wherever he needs to be, he’s good, it’s

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6:12

42. Small Words

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2023/12/28

In this space, I try to find the words to explain what it’s like.It can seem like such a tiny thing, really. Nothing to add to a Christmas Card.A flash of knowing, a smiling pause.What it’s like, for example, to watch my 24-year-old son easily accept the pulse oximeter on his index finger from a new nurse at a new doctor’s office but then watch him become confused when she steps away for too long.What it’s like to see how he reaches out his hand to her, stretching from his chair, trying to get her

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5:52

41. Flexibility

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2023/11/14

Four seemingly unrelated micro fragments that explore attitudes toward change. To resist, adapt, accept, embrace.Please go to https://itslikethis.substack.com/p/41-flexibility for the full transcript. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit itslikethis.substack.com

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4:51

40. House Rules

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2023/10/24

I’m not a poet (oh, I know it), but for this issue, I followed a prompt to write a “pantoum” style poem. This was interesting and fun, so I decided to share. Please see https://itslikethis.substack.com/p/40-house-rules for the poem and full transcript of this post. Thanks! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit itslikethis.substack.com

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6:01

39. Run

It"s Like This Podcast ·

2023/10/10

“Run” was originally published by BarBar Literary Magazine.I run down the deserted bike path, along the winding, manicured greenbelt behind the homes of our new neighborhood. Through wrought iron fences, I can see into my neighbors’ backyards, their pools and patio chairs empty on this weekday morning. Behind closed sliding glass doors, suburban housewives mind their own business, a few perhaps shaking their heads at the distant sound of a fellow mom losing her s**t....Please go to

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