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Life of Bi

From Ancient China to TikTok, dating dilemmas to Judith Butler, Life of Bi is your bi-monthly deep-dive into what it means to be a modern bisexual. Hosted by the Hotter Project duo Ell and Mary, You can find us @hotterproject on socials.Written, created and hosted by Ell Potter and Mary Higgins. Sound design, music and production by Tom Foskett-Barnes. Episodes 1-8 research by Eve Brandon, Robin Craig, Ell Potter and Mary Higgins. Episodes 1-8 produced by Ellie Keel. Graphic design by Madison

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

45:35

Episode 47: buddhist gender melt

Life of Bi ·

2025/09/03

Fresh back from an LGBTQ+ silent meditation retreat, Mary has some big questions on their mind. When and where do you feel your gender disappearing? Is that a good feeling - and, in a world of containers & labels, is it one we should seek more? Plus, special guest Cec talks about their upcoming top surgery and has an exciting event announcement!Come along to HUNKDOWN at Chat’s Palace on September 10th. Buy your tickets

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35:02

Episode 46: agony ankle #3 - date your mates?

Life of Bi ·

2025/06/04

A listener writes in to ask advice for dating their best friend. Ell digs out an old email from Mary immediately post their break up back in 2017, and Ell & Mary ask a bunch of their friends: is it ever a good idea to date your mates?Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work: https://www.lifeofbi.co.uk/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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1:10:52

Episode 45: 'common sense'

Life of Bi ·

2025/05/21

When transphobes call the definition of a woman ‘common sense’, what do they actually mean? We have little in common and, at least to us, they speak little sense. Following the Supreme Court’s judgment on trans rights, Mary uses Andrea Long Chu’s radical work ‘Females’ to try to understand what trans-exclusionary feminists feel they are ‘losing’ to trans people; while Ell explores studies that find commonality and solidarity between bi+ and trans communities.If you can, please don’t hesitate to

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1:04:04

Episode 44: queering the Quran with Lamya H

Life of Bi ·

2025/05/14

Lamya H is a queer muslim parent, and author of the memoir Hijab Butch Blues. Join Lamya, Ell and Mary for a conversation around Islamophobia, queer parenting and faith in justice.Support The Good Law Project legal challenge of the UK Supreme Court ruling on sex-based rights: https://goodlawproject.org/crowdfunder/supreme-court-human-rights-for-trans-peopleEnjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work: https://www.lifeofbi.co.uk/ Hosted on Acast

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29:37

Episode 43: agony ankle #2 - fashion advice for...

Life of Bi ·

2025/04/16

In this latest instalment of Life of Bi’s Agony Ankle segment we hear from a listener who’s struggling to work out what to wear to the Cloob. Luckily Ell and Mary are expert fashionistas (🤨), and touch on some big Qs while dispensing advice: what does ‘sexy’ actually mean when you’re asexual? Are we dressing for ourselves, or others? And what do you do when yer old friend dysmorphia means you don’t want to be perceived by anybody, at all?!Get involved; ask your own Agony Ankle question

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56:49

Episode 42: bisexuality under capitalism with Sophie...

Life of Bi ·

2025/03/31

Buckle up fellas! And ready yourselves for an excursive exploration of how bisexuality operates under capitalism. We’ve long been fans of Sophie K Rosa’s radical writings on modern love, intimacy, and relational structures, and were thrilled to find that they are a fellow bisexual — and listen to LOB. In this episode we wonder: are bisexuals too slippery to market to? what does capitalism stand to gain from ignoring fluidity? and — does bisexuality suffer from… a branding issue?!Enjoying Life of Bi

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22:16

Episode 41: agony ankle - am i bi enough?

Life of Bi ·

2025/03/21

The first edition of Agony Ankle - where we answer your questions. Join us for today’s classic bi+ dilemma - am I actually bi? To write in with your own queries, dilemmas and goss - head tohotterproject.co.uk/lifeofbi.Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work: https://www.lifeofbi.co.uk/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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50:50

Episode 40: bi+ mental health with Bailey Merlin

Life of Bi ·

2025/03/05

Did you know it’s Bi+ Health Awareness Month? Oh, and did you know that bisexual people suffer from worse mental health than their lesbian and gay counterparts? Well, we didn’t either. Until we met Bailey. Join us for an eye-opening exploration in the under-researched field of bi+ mental health.Bailey is co-host of the Bisexual Killjoy podcast - go check it out!Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work: https://www.lifeofbi.co.uk Hosted on

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46:19

Episode 39: optics odyssey

Life of Bi ·

2025/02/19

A chill chat about the politics of optics snowballs into a deep dive on Judith Butler and the cosmos. Ell and Mary muse on what it means to be ‘culturally intelligible’ as bisexuals, and wonder if it really matters — finding solace in the work of theoretical physicist Chanda Prescod-Weinstein.Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work: https://www.lifeofbi.co.uk/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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1:02:05

Episode 38: four years later

Life of Bi ·

2025/02/03

It's been four years since Ell and Mary started working on Life of Bi. Join them for a big conversation about how their relationships to bisexuality have changed (or stayed the same) since then, touching on bi-erasure, biphobia, flux, doubt, belief -- and how all these make a Life of Bi.Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work: https://www.lifeofbi.co.uk/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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1:07:59

Episode 37: queer friendship with Dr Monica Pearl

Life of Bi ·

2024/12/26

In this very special episode, Ell and Mary talk to veteran professor and HIV/AIDS activist Dr Monica Pearl about her experiences with Act Up and the unique and under-studied intricacies of queer friendship. A perfect antidote and/or accompaniment to the festive season when the emphasis is on “family time”.We met Monica at the Sexuality Summer School, a week of workshops, performances and roundtables held each year at the University of Manchester.Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at:

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50:45

Episode 36: "wedding" planning

Life of Bi ·

2024/11/18

change is in the air for Ell and Mary as they reflect on rituals surrounding moving out, moving in, and moving on. What starts as a ‘wedding planning’ episode turns into a call for ceremony in our everyday lives.Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work: https://www.lifeofbi.co.uk/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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1:05:41

Episode 35: queer marriage

Life of Bi ·

2024/10/31

After a summer full of wedding bells and disco dancing, Ell and Mary are inspired. But should they take sweet sweet matrimony with a pinch of anti-capitalist salt? Join them as they look at the history of gay marriage in the UK, exploring the choice at the heart of many a queer issue: assimilate, or resist...Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work: https://www.lifeofbi.co.uk/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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55:28

Episode 34: neuroqueer

Life of Bi ·

2024/09/24

How can we understand the intersection between queerness and neurodiversity? Ell and Mary take a hard look at the existing research to try and understand why so many queers are neurospicy, and vice versa. Splitting up to look for clues, Ell turns her attention to the co-occurrence of ADHD and bisexuality, while Mary interrogates the connection between autism and gender-nonconforming identities.Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work:

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55:48

Episode 33: gay panic

Life of Bi ·

2024/07/02

It's the episode you've all been waiting for... Ell & Mary's hot (well, now tepid) take on the hit BBC show I KISSED A GIRL. Join us for a deep dive in which we ask: what does "gay panic" actually mean? Is there such a thing as bi or nonbinary panic? What'sthe deal with gender on the show? And most importantly: if we were on it, would anyone fancy us?!?Alison Bechdel clip: https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2020/04/13/t-magazine/butch-stud-lesbian.htmlEnjoying Life of Bi? Support us at:

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48:34

Episode 32: solidarity

Life of Bi ·

2024/06/17

It's been 10 years since the film 'Pride' came out - a heartwarming billion-dollar British blockbuster about the birth of Lesbians and Gays Support The Miners (LGSM). Ell and Mary chart the legacy of LGSM from its early days to today's Lesbians & Gays Support The Migrants movement, asking: what can it teach us - or warn us - about solidarity today?Show solidarity with Palestine now by donating to Medical Aid for Palestinians:https://www.map.org.uk/Or join Direct Action near you with Palestine

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1:03:28

Episode 31: bi married men

Life of Bi ·

2024/04/21

Are bi married men the most invisible bisexuals? Join Ell and Mary in conversation with Robert Cohen, author of‘Bi Married Men: Stories of Relationships, Acceptance & Authenticity’ and host of the wildly successful podcast 2 Bi Guys.Find the book here:https://www.routledge.com/Bisexual-Married-Men-Stories-of-Relationships-Acceptance-and-Authenticity/Cohen/p/book/9781032473260And tickets to our Bristol run here:https://bristololdvic.org.uk/whats-on/the-last-show-before-we-dieEnjoying Life of Bi

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36:19

Episode 30: the bi-section: All Of Us Strangers

Life of Bi ·

2024/02/19

It's Ell & Mary's 30th episode, and they celebrate by not mentioning bisexuality a single time! Come ease into 2024 with a discussion on the queer credentials of Andrew Haigh’s latest film All Of Us Strangers. Expect low-stakes chat with high-brow ideas, including Lee Edelman’s Death Drive and Bessel van der Kolk’s theory on body trauma. P.S. this is not a film podcast. We repeat, this is not a film podcast.Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about

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58:00

Episode 29: all about carol

Life of Bi ·

2023/12/22

Ell and Mary aren’t film critics but they are queer. And that’s all the expertise they need surely? It’s cold outside, come on in for a free-spirited barely-edited long form discussion of Todd Haynes’ movie Carol starring Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara, hosted by your fave amateurs. Things are about to get sexy…Enjoying Life of Bi? Support us at: https://www.patreon.com/lifeofbiFind out more about our work: https://www.lifeofbi.co.uk/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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44:08

Episode 28: queers for palestine

Life of Bi ·

2023/11/28

On November 9th, The Telegraph published an opinion piece by writer Brendan O'Neill titled, 'Queers for Palestine must have a death wish'. In today's episode, Ell and Mary answer: no we don't.Palestinian liberation is a queer issue. Here's why.Support alQaws for for Sexual & Gender Diversity in Palestinian Society: http://alqaws.org/support-usOXSID interview with Dr Sa'ed Atshan: https://soundcloud.com/oxsidorg/a-discussion-of-queer-palestine-and-the-empire-of-critique-with-dr-saed-atshanGAY

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