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PODCAST

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast

Welcome to The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast— hosted by mindset + intuitive coach, author, and “SOFT Love” enthusiast Kindall D. This is your safe space to heal from toxic relationship patterns and find healthy love, starting within. No shame, no pressure—just real talk, inner work, and heart-centered support. I believe in “soft love,” not “tough love”—because you’ve already been through enough. This is about helping you reconnect with your power in a way that feels nurturing, not punishing. You’re

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

00:31:13

142. So It Was a Mother Wound That Made Me Chase...

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/10/01

For years, I thought my struggles with men came from a father wound. I assumed that because I had patterns of chasing emotionally unavailable men, wanting to feel chosen, and staying too long in relationships that hurt me, there had to be something unresolved in my relationship with my father.But when I really looked at my childhood, I realized something completely different:It wasn’t a father wound. It was a mother wound.I was a daddy’s girl growing up, and my relationship with my father didn’t

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00:27:44

141. Stop Making His Inability to Love You a...

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/09/17

What if the most painful part of a relationship ending isn’t only what he did to you—but what you started believing about yourself because of it?If you already carried beliefs that you were unlovable, unwanted, not enough, too much, or somehow difficult to choose, being hurt by someone you loved can feel like confirmation.He didn’t choose me.I’m not worth choosing.He couldn’t love me properly.I’m not lovable.He left.People always leave me.And suddenly, someone else’s behavior becomes evidence for a

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00:32:52

140. Don’t Be So Understanding That You Settle For Less

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/09/10

What happens when being understanding starts keeping you stuck in a relationship that hurts you?In this podcast episode we’re discussing the limits of understanding someone you love. You can understand his childhood, his wounds, his fears, his attachment style, and even why he struggles to love you the way you need—and still decide that his behavior is not something you are willing to keep experiencing.Sometimes women become so good at seeing a man’s perspective that they stop honoring their own

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00:31:50

139. You Don’t Need Him to Change. You Need to Decide.

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/09/03

You don’t need him to change. You need to decide.Sometimes we spend so much time hoping someone will become the person we need that we forget to ask ourselves a much harder question: what am I going to do if he doesn’t?This episode is about making that decision.“Make Him Either Rise to You or Lose Access to You” isn’t about manipulating a man, playing games, withholding affection, or trying to force someone into becoming a better partner. It’s about knowing what you need in a relationship and being

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00:32:09

138. Grieving the Future You Thought You’d Have With Him

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/08/27

Grieving the future you thought you’d have with him can be one of the hardest parts of letting go.Sometimes you’re not just grieving the man. You’re grieving the marriage you imagined, the family you pictured, the life you planned, and all the moments you thought the two of you would eventually share.In this episode of Healing Sundays, I’m talking about what happens when you become so attached to the future you imagined with someone that you stop paying attention to the relationship you’re actually

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00:35:04

137. He Doesn’t Want a Relationship—And It’s Not Your...

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/08/20

He says he doesn’t want a relationship, but he still calls, texts, spends time with you, acts like your boyfriend and enjoys all the benefits of being with you. So what does that actually mean?In this episode, we’re talking about the confusion that comes with being involved with a man who says he doesn’t want commitment but continues to participate in something that feels like a relationship. We’ll get into situationships, mixed signals, relationship benefits without commitment, and why his

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00:34:20

136. The Wrong Man Will Have You Questioning Your Worth

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/08/13

Have you ever known you were a good woman but still found yourself wondering why you weren’t good enough for him?In this episode, we’re talking about how being with the wrong man can slowly make you question your worth—not because you never knew your worth, but because his inability to choose you, cherish you, or love you well can make you feel like you need to prove it.We’ll talk about why we become so focused on getting the wrong man to recognize our value, why his refusal to grow can make us

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00:37:46

135. I Disagree With The Phrase, “Love Isn’t Enough”

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/08/06

Love is enough.But only when we’re talking about love as something we practice, not just something we feel.In this episode of The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast, we’re exploring one of the hardest questions in healing:If love alone isn’t enough… what have we been calling love all this time?Many of us learned to define love by chemistry, kind gestures, moments of connection, or the relief of finally feeling seen. But real love isn’t measured by isolated moments—it’s revealed through consistent

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00:45:12

134. The Grief That Comes With Choosing Yourself

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/07/30

Everyone tells you to choose yourself.Set the boundary. Say no. Put yourself first. Protect your peace.But no one talks about what happens after.In this episode of The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast, we’re having an honest conversation about the emotional cost of choosing yourself. The loneliness, grief, guilt, identity shifts, and growing pains that often come with becoming the person you were always meant to be.If you’ve ever felt like healing has been harder than you expected, or wondered why choosing

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00:23:14

133. You Were Never Meant to Earn Love by Overgiving...

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/07/16

Many women have been taught that love is something they earn by giving more of themselves. In this episode, we’re unlearning that belief together.We’re talking about what it actually means to be loved well, why healthy love protects you from overextending yourself, and why someone who truly loves you pays attention to what your giving is costing you.Because the healthiest love you’ll ever experience won’t ask you to disappear—it will make more room for you to exist.✨ Let’s connect:💜1:1 coaching

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00:40:59

132. You Can Leave Based On How He Makes You...

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/07/09

If you’ve been going back and forth in your head trying to figure out if what you’re feeling is valid — this video is for you.You don’t need receipts. You don’t need a list of things he did wrong. You don’t need to be able to explain it to your friends or make it make sense to him. A feeling is data. And it is enough.In this video we’re talking about why so many women intellectualize their way through relationships that are hurting them — overanalyzing his behavior, researching his attachment style,

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00:32:57

131. Decentering Men is What Gets You the Man

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/06/25

If you want to stop chasing men and start attracting healthier love, this episode is for you.In today’s episode, we’re talking about why making men the center of your life often keeps you stuck in unhealthy dating patterns—and why the women who seem to attract healthy, committed relationships usually have one thing in common: their lives don’t revolve around being chosen.We’ll discuss why centering men makes you ignore red flags, overinvest too quickly, and lose yourself in the process. More

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00:17:16

130. Make Him Feel What It’s Like to Not Have You

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/06/18

If you’ve been loving harder, explaining more, forgiving faster, and doing everything you can to keep the relationship together, this episode is for you.So many women believe the answer to feeling appreciated is giving more. But what if the very thing preventing someone from appreciating you is that they’ve never had to experience life without your constant presence?In this episode, we’re talking about why constantly rescuing the relationship can actually protect someone from the consequences of

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00:17:19

129. How to Stop Losing Yourself in Relationships...

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/06/11

In this episode, we’re exploring the neuroscience behind relationship anxiety, attachment wounds, and why so many women lose themselves around men they deeply care about.We’ll talk about:✨ Why your nervous system mistakes attachment for safety✨ The hidden fear underneath relationship anxiety✨ Why rejection feels so painful✨ How childhood and past relationships shape your attachment patterns✨ The neuroscience of self-abandonment✨ How to retrain your brain for healthy love✨ Why you’re not actually

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00:19:50

128. Why He Pulled Away When You Loved Him

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/05/21

Trying to love an unhealed man can slowly make you question your worth, your emotions, and even the way you love. In this video, we’re talking about emotional unavailability, ego, intimacy, self-worth, and the hidden damage women experience when they pour love into men who have not healed emotionally.This conversation is not about blaming women for loving deeply — it’s about helping women understand that someone’s inability to receive healthy love is not proof that they are difficult to love.We’ll

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00:19:37

127. Make Him Come Correct—or Leave You Alone

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/05/14

Your attachment made him feel more important than he actually was.In this video, we’re talking about anxious attachment, emotionally unavailable men, boundaries, fear of abandonment, and why healing sometimes means letting go of people who were never aligned with you to begin with.Make him come correct—or leave you alone.💜1:1 coaching &BONUS podcast episodes https://www.patreon.com/Ivebeenthatgirl💜books, coaching and more:https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.netAuthors page:

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00:17:17

126. Stop Being Afraid of Being “Mean” to Men...

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/05/07

A lot of women are not afraid of being “mean” to men.They’re afraid of being abandoned, misunderstood, punished, or losing someone they’ve already become emotionally attached to.In this video, we’re talking about:* anxious attachment in dating* fear of running men off* why boundaries feel “mean”* attachment to emotionally unavailable men* people pleasing in relationships* fear of male retaliation/rejection* overexplaining yourself to men* why clarity scares you more than settlingBecause the truth

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00:25:54

125. Men Like Klay Thompson Have a “Love Addiction” |...

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/04/30

✨ Let’s connect:💜1:1 coaching &BONUS podcast episodes https://www.patreon.com/Ivebeenthatgirl💜books, coaching and more:https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.netAuthors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld💜MY SOCIALS:YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6VrI’ve Been That Girl, too Instagram: (151K followers) https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/TikTok: (42.7K Followers) https://www.tiktok.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?_t=8s8vdJSMVZv&_r=1Threads: (35K followers)

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00:26:07

124. Make Him Step Up Without Begging, Chasing, or...

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/04/23

If you’ve ever felt like you had to beg a man to show up, explain your needs over and over, or chase consistency… this is the truth most people won’t say out loud.Men don’t step up because of what you say.They step up because of what your presence requires.In this episode, we’re talking about why over-explaining, overgiving, and overextending actually keeps you stuck in the cycle of inconsistency—and what to do instead.This isn’t about playing games or manipulating him.It’s about shifting out of

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00:17:42

123. You Don’t Want Love—You Want to Be Chosen

The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast ·

2026/04/16

You didn’t just want love…you wanted to be chosen.And without realizing it, that need can turn into something deeper—an identity.In this video, we’re talking about what happens when your sense of self becomes tied to who chooses you… and why rejection feels so personal, why you stay longer than you should, and why it’s so hard to let go—even when you know something isn’t right.Because this isn’t just about relationships.It’s about the meaning you’ve attached to being picked.At some point, you stop

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