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PODCAST

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved One"s Recovery from Addiction & Mental Illness

Allies in Recovery

This podcast is comprised of three series addressing topics relevant to families dealing with a loved one"s addiction: - FAMILIES SPEAK: parents share wisdom, tools & experience using CRAFT (a proven method) with their loved one - Partner CRAFT: co-hosts explore the specificity of using CRAFT with a romantic partner (or ex) - VOICES from the FRONT LINES: Guests share expertise and stories Allies in Recovery provides online learning modules, expert hand-tailored guidance, CRAFT support groups,

kids & family parenting

All Episodes

00:34:09

CLASSICS REVISITED: Speaking Up the Compassionate Way

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/10/02

How do you communicate when you see (your Loved One's) problematic behavior? We'll show you how to pay more attention to *intention* — CRAFT guides us to observe the behavior, and point it calmly and thoughtfully and without adding your two cents/ personal interpretation. Once you have briefly and specifically told your Loved One how the behavior impacts you, you can then step back without expectation of an outcome, and give them the dignity of processing what you've said. Over time,

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00:27:01

CLASSICS REVISITED: Sectioning -- When to Consider...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/09/25

"Sectioning," or using the courts to force your loved one into treatment, is an extreme tool, and not optimal. It conflicts with some of the pillars of the CRAFT method, but it's also sometimes unavoidable. Use the CRAFT skills to understand when danger is acute, and enough to warrant sectioning.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.Wednesdays at 6:30pm ETEmail kaylacraftgroup@gmail.com to join or learn more(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach

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00:28:40

CLASSICS REVISITED: Giving Your Loved One Trust and...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/09/18

Kayla and Laurie discuss short-term vs. long-term change -- start by working on one change in yourself rather than in your loved one, like focusing on your thought process, choosing to trust and step back, giving your loved one the chance to make decisions. This gives both of you the tools for slower, but more effective long-term change -- think of erosion, not a tsunami.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.Wednesdays at 6:30pm ETEmail

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00:23:36

CLASSICS REVISITED: How to Ask Effective Questions

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/09/11

How do you ask questions that create space for your Loved One rather than hemming them in? We may have brilliant ideas about what someone should do, and want to share. The skills we need, however, are openness and a willingness to hear the other person and provide space and opportunity for them to process. Learn how to back away, avoid interrupting, and let your Loved One talk without offering your feedback.In this episode, we explain why this approach works better.The support group that Kayla

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00:27:27

CLASSICS REVISITED: Creating a Safe Space for...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/09/04

You can help your loved one make decisions by creating a safe space -- by listening, being genuinely interested in their perspective, being non-judgmental, and allowing them to slow things down to examine their own thinking. Avoid trying to fix things yourself, and assume that they're wise enough to know what they need. Your role is to help them make their own choices.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if

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00:26:31

CLASSICS REVISITED: How, Why, and When to Put...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/08/28

How do you take care of yourself when there's a crisis with your loved one? It's a process of changing how you think about yourself and your role in the dynamic. If you can change how you think -- even for small parts of the day -- it changes the dynamic with your loved one, allowing them the freedom to look at themselves, and not just worry about how they impact you. Laurie and Kayla share tips.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not

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00:26:27

CLASSICS REVISITED: Answering Listener Questions

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/08/21

In all our interactions with our loved one, it's important to be open to conversation, and seek a way to be collaborative rather than making demands. Our hosts discuss two listener questions, one about a partner who wants a debit card back, and another about a friend who's picking someone up from prison and wants to help continue their seeking of sobriety.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if you're interested)Allies in Recovery's member site is currently "on

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00:20:53

CLASSICS REVISITED: Motivation -- What Drives Change

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/08/14

Motivation drives change. How do you find motivation to change your part of the dynamic, and allow time and space for the process to unfold? It's okay to sometimes feel like maybe things aren't working, then get back on track. If you don't know how to change, Allies in Recovery offers a toolbox. As long as you stay interested and use the tools, things can change.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if

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00:21:21

CLASSICS REVISITED: What is Radical Acceptance?

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/08/07

Radical acceptance involves understanding that much of what happens is out of your control, and using strategies to calm, distract, and soothe yourself. The goal is to avoid catastrophizing -- envisioning and preparing for the worst outcomes. Radical acceptance means letting go of what you can't control, experiencing feelings and pain, but without increasing agitation, reactivity, and suffering.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a

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00:33:57

CLASSICS REVISITED: When Your Loved One Uses Multiple...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/07/31

If your loved one uses multiple substances, use the "functional analysis" to understand which substance to focus on first. Start small, by changing your own behavior in response to your loved one's use. Aim to shift over time. Study CRAFT modules 3, 5, and 6 closely to help make your plans.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if you're interested)Allies in Recovery's member site is currently

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00:37:00

CLASSICS REVISITED: Coming Home

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/07/24

After any treatment, when someone is in early recovery, check your expectations. Your loved one is likely in a fragile state, uncomfortable, edgy, body wrecked after dependency, and disregulated physically and emotionally. It's a time of transition, so have realistic expectations. Be gentle, caring, and connected, not an inquisitor. Connection is key.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if you're

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00:25:36

CLASSICS REVISITED: Unsolicited Advice: Helpful or...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/07/17

It's smart to avoid giving unsolicited advice. If you receive it, hold your ground, knowing that you're dedicated to upholding the CRAFT model. Consider telling the advice-giver to look into CRAFT to understand what you're doing.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if you're interested)Allies in Recovery's member site is currently "on pause". ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more

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00:30:55

CLASSICS REVISITED: An Interview with Meme English

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/07/10

Guest Meme English, a former family therapist and consultant in the legal system, discusses family dynamics. When it comes to substance use, family dynamics are complicated. There are many layers of trauma, from generational to personal, and competing needs among family members. Balancing all these factors and personal situations means deciding whose needs get most clearly met. Trauma therapy also requires time and commitment, and is harder to find since the pandemic.The support group that Kayla

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00:26:46

CLASSICS REVISITED: Conditional Love, Unconditional...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/07/03

Let's look at shame and negative thinking and discuss how to slow down, gain awareness, and soothe your system. Our hosts focus on the essential tool of empathy -- especially for yourself -- as a way to understand what story you’re making up, and change that story by looking for the positive even in difficult moments.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if you're interested)Allies in Recovery's member

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00:26:33

CLASSICS REVISITED: When Do You Work on Use of...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/06/26

Dominique shares a family’s question about a loved one who’s addressed the most pressing substance use. Should the family now focus on their loved one’s cannabis use? Our hosts discuss harm reduction and the role of the “functional analysis” in CRAFT to address such questions. The analysis involves reviewing what’s changed, patterns and dynamics, and making sure your own behaviors support reduction of use. These actions are subtle, and their subtlety makes them more effective. Even with multiple

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00:29:22

CLASSICS REVISITED: Conditional Love, Unconditional...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/06/19

Even when love is not conditional, there sometimes must be conditions regarding people’s behavior. Love in romantic relationships may change if you break up, but with family members, conditionality applies to behavior, not love. What we as family members can modify is how we react and our expectations. Conditionality goes back to boundary issues – there are edges someone comes to where they must stop what they’re doing. It’s important to note that wishing someone would go away is a normal,

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00:29:25

CLASSICS REVISITED: Facing Obstacles Part 2: How to...

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/06/12

What do you do in those difficult moments when you feel ramped-up? Laurie and Kayla discuss strategies to back away and not go with the emotion of the moment.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if you're interested)Allies in Recovery's member site is currently "on pause". ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. During this time, we have taken our entire eLearning program out from behind the

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00:32:54

CLASSICS REVISITED: Facing the Obstacles, Part 1

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/06/06

What are the obstacles between knowing what to do and putting that knowledge into real practice? In part 1, our hosts focus on avoiding a "crisis" response, and slowing events down to avoid being reactive.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if you're interested)Allies in Recovery's member site is currently "on pause". ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. During this time, we have

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00:28:56

CLASSICS REVISITED: Making Changes at Your Own Pace

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/05/29

Laurie and Kayla discuss change -- how to manage it, how quickly it can or can't happen, and how to focus your efforts.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if you're interested)Allies in Recovery's member site is currently "on pause". ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. During this time, we have taken our entire eLearning program out from behind the paywall—the entire library of learning

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00:33:03

CLASSICS REVISITED: What CRAFT Can Do in 12 Weeks

Coming Up for Air — A Toolkit to Help with Your Loved... ·

2026/05/15

An overview of the first twelve weeks of CRAFT, discussing what it can accomplish quickly, and what becomes a lifetime practice.The support group that Kayla facilitates is now offered on a sliding scale.(Cost should not be a barrier—please reach out if you're interested)Allies in Recovery's member site is currently "on pause". ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. During this time, we have taken our entire eLearning program out from behind the paywall—the entire library of learning

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