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PODCAST

Diary of a Matchmaker

Getting married is tough for the vast majority of Muslims in the West. We know because we’ve been there. My (Zaid) journey spanned nearly nine years. It was filled with rejections and self-doubt. While I (Hiba) didn"t know there was a journey to be on in the first place. After we got married we decided to create something different to help single Muslims complete their deen. And so our matchmaking service Halal Match was born.After a few years of interviewing singles, a friend suggested we journal

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

23:48

This Might Be Your Most Costly Filter!

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/12/12

Real talk: what if you’re single not because your standards are high, but because you’re filtering out every man under a certain number? In this episode, we unpack why height has become the unofficial dealbreaker for so many single women and how that one filter quietly shrinks your options and sometimes blocks amazing men. We get into the psychology, the social pressure, the curated expectations, and the difference between real attraction and conditioned attraction. We share stories from our ...

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67:19

Secrets to Building Wealth Before Marriage w/ Areeb...

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/12/05

What if the real glow-up before marriage isn’t skincare… it’s your bank account? Most of us grew up hearing “just save” with zero clue how money actually grows, moves, and works for you. In this episode, financial educator and consultant Areeb Khawaja spills the secrets no one in our communities explains, the quiet moves that build wealth before the marriage talks even begin. Think: the accounts nobody told you about, the small habits that snowball into freedom, the creative ways to mi...

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30:09

Too Religious For Some, Too Liberal For Others!

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/11/28

Today we get into the messy reality of being a single Muslim in a world obsessed with labels. We talk about how people use “religious,” “conservative,” and “liberal” as shortcuts instead of actually getting to know someone—and how that leaves so many amazing matches dismissed before the first conversation even starts. We also dig into family judgments, unfair assumptions, and what happens when someone is written off because of their parents, not their own character. If you’re tired of being b...

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39:54

From Child-Free by Choice to Expecting by Choice 🥳

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/11/21

We never thought we’d say this out loud… but we were that Muslim couple who confidently said, “We’re not having kids.” Full stop. And now? Alhamdullilah! We’re expecting. This episode is one of the rawest we’ve ever recorded: the real fears, the private conversations, the guilt, the relief, and the plot twist that changed everything. But this isn’t just about us. It’s about you, the single Muslim who’s unsure about kids, overwhelmed by the world, afraid of losing yourself, or scared of choosi...

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36:03

Muslim Matrimonial Events: A Lifeline or a Hot Mess?

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/11/14

Tired of “halal speed dating” that feels like a performance instead of a real path to marriage? In this episode, we get honest about the modern Muslim matrimonial scene—what’s actually helping people connect and what’s just… awkward. From wild rotation stories to on-stage “auditions,” we break down why five-minute pitches and public biodata walls never lead anywhere. But we also share what does work: real pre-screening, balanced ratios, confidential spaces, and activities that bring out...

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52:08

Behind Closed Doors: Single Muslims and Porn w/ Dr....

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/11/07

Let’s be real, porn is everywhere. And yes, Muslims are watching it too, way more than anyone admits. In this episode, we sit down with Dr. Fahad Khan, a clinical psychologist and an expert in Islamic psychology. We talk about why so many singles fall into it, how hard it’s become to get married, and how that mix messes with the mind, the heart, and even real attraction. Whether you’ve struggled with it or you’re worried the person you’re talking to might be, this episode peels back the silen...

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58:18

The 2nd Most Important Talk to Have Before Marriage...

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/10/31

Most single people think parenting is a future problem, something to worry about after having children. But the truth is, the way you’ll handle kids one day is already showing up in how you argue, apologize, or deal with stress today. The problem isn’t the kids, it’s us. How we handle emotions, set boundaries, and respond to conflict often reflects patterns from our own upbringing. On this episode we’re hosting parenting coach Maysaa Fahour to explore why learning about parenting early makes ...

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26:52

What if I Never Get Married?

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/10/24

What if marriage never happens? Not as a gloomy thought, but as a real, quiet one many of us have whispered at some point. What if you’ve prayed, tried, and waited, and it still doesn’t come? What then? This episode speaks to that space between faith and fatigue, the longing, the grief, and the slow work of finding joy again. We talk about what it means to build a full, meaningful life even when marriage isn’t part of the picture, and how Allah’s plan for you is never on pause. Downloa...

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27:50

Is Lowering the Gaze Still Relevant Today?

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/10/17

Have you ever been told to “lower your gaze” and wondered what that’s supposed to look like in 2025 when the hardest place to lower it isn’t the street, but your screen? One innocent scroll can turn into a full-blown spiral before you even realize it. We’re talking about the subtle stuff: how comparison, curiosity, and constant exposure slowly shape what we find attractive, and how that ends up affecting real-life attraction, confidence, and even marriage expectations. Because it’s not just a...

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65:10

This Could Save Your Marriage Before It Starts w/...

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/10/03

Most couples obsess over the wedding details: venues, flowers, guest lists... but skip the one step that actually prepares you for marriage. We know because we skipped it too. And trust us, it’s a mistake we don't want you to make. Today we sit down with psychotherapist Hina Mirza to uncover why premarital counseling isn’t some boring checklist, it’s the ultimate hack for a smoother, happier marriage. Think of it as marriage prep you’ll actually enjoy: decoding communication, spotting blind ...

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44:19

How Much To Share About Your Past?

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/09/26

“Should I tell them about my past?” It’s the question that makes every single Muslim pause. And let’s be real, our communities don’t make it easier. Men often get a pass, while women get judged twice as hard for the same mistakes. In this episode, we confront the myths and double standards around sharing your past in marriage conversations. What must be disclosed, and what belongs between you and Allah? And how do you talk about sensitive topics without trauma dumping or oversharing? If you’v...

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42:29

What Men & Women Think About Each Other

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/09/21

“Men only care about looks.” “Women only care about money.” Sound bites like these have turned the Muslim marriage search into a battle of stereotypes. But are men really afraid of commitment? Are women really desperate for it? In this episode, we call out the misconceptions that pit men and women against each other and dig into how they’re sabotaging real connections. We also ask tougher questions: does being “religious” automatically make someone a good spouse, or are we ignoring qualities ...

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63:15

Masculinity in Crisis: Between Toxic and Weak w/ Dr....

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/09/12

Masculinity is either glorified or vilified, and single Muslims often pay the price. Women get told to avoid “dominant” men, while men are told to tone themselves down to avoid being toxic. The result? Confusion, frustration, and marriages built on false expectations. In this conversation with Dr. Omar Husain, we confront the uncomfortable truths about masculinity in Islam. Men are challenged to stop outsourcing their growth and step into real responsibility. Women are pushed to look beyond s...

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32:12

The Talking Stage: How Long Is Too Long?

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/09/05

How long should the talking stage really last? For many Muslims, what starts as a way to assess compatibility drags on for months or even years with no real progress. In this episode we dive into the question every single faces: when does talking cross the line from intentional to wasted time? We explore why so many get stuck, the signs it has gone on too long, and how to know when it’s time to move forward or move on. If you’ve ever felt trapped in endless conversations with no clarity, this...

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40:56

Awkward Talks: Childbirth Before Marriage

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/08/29

Childbirth talk when you’re single? Awkward. “Not for public discussion”? Maybe. “Only for women”? Definitely what most people think. But here’s the truth: understanding this journey before marriage could transform your future relationship. In this episode, we chat with certified doula Hebaa Rizeq about why pregnancy prep isn’t just a “married women’s issue.” From faith-meets-science insights to the overlooked role of men in birth, this conversation breaks taboos in the best way. If you’re si...

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28:27

How Our Naivety Almost Killed Our Business

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/08/22

This is the story of how our big idea for Muslim matchmaking nearly backfired. We set out to create the ultimate premium experience, convinced that generosity and effort would guarantee results. Instead, we discovered that the real obstacle wasn’t bad matches but unready hearts. What looked like dream opportunities often ended with hesitation, doubt, or a belief that something better might come along. In this episode, we share the mistakes that nearly sank us, the turning point that reshaped ...

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53:54

How to Master Conflict Before Marriage? w/ Kamela Salimi

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/08/15

Think conflict management is only for married couples? Wrong. If you’re single and hoping for a healthy marriage, now is the time to learn it. In this episode, psychotherapist Kamela Salimi shares why conflict is the top issue she sees in couples therapy and how singles can prepare before saying “I do.” We unpack Dr. John Gottman’s “Four Horsemen” and their antidotes, explore how Islam offers built-in tools for emotional regulation long before therapy named them, and reveal why "freedom from ...

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26:54

Where To Meet Single Muslims Beyond The Algorithm?

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/08/08

If finding a spouse feels like shouting into the void, it might be a visibility problem, not a you problem. Today we unpack what it really means to be visible as a single Muslim. From offline spaces you might be overlooking to subtle shifts in your digital presence, we share practical ways to rethink where and how you show up. It's not about being everywhere, it's about being in the right places and being intentional. Whether you're feeling stuck or just getting started, this episode helps yo...

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26:19

Marrying in 2025: Here's What We'd Do Differently

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/08/01

If we were getting married in 2025, we’d do things very differently. After four years as professional matchmakers and a whole lot of hindsight we’ve got some honest reflections (and a few regrets) to share. This episode dives into the blind spots we didn’t see coming, the mindset shifts we wish we had earlier, and the biggest lessons we now pass on to our clients. Whether you're single, searching, or simply curious, this one’s for you. We’re saying all the things we wish someone had told us b...

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0:23

Quick Update!

Diary of a Matchmaker ·

2025/07/25

Got a dilemma or story? The Single Muslim Hotline is here for you! We’ll play your anonymous messages in future episodes and offer real talk. Drop us a voice note 👇🏻 https://www.speakpipe.com/DiaryOfAMatchmaker

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