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PODCAST

Danger, Vicious Dog

Started updating my bio Dec 31, 2023. Accidentally wrote four autofiction books. Slid from narrative into monologue—not stream-of-consciousness, more like speech-speed meaning performance. Trained my voice into AI, produced a shit-ton of pieces. Had too many. Needed a place to dump them. Saw a sign that said “Beware, Vicious Dog!” Misread it. Named the podcast Danger, Vicious Dog. Didn’t fix it. Just kept going. Queer. Cosmic. Sarcastic. Cheap. Accidentally committed to the bit. Some voice and art

comedy improv

All Episodes

00:56:59

E9: I'm Broken; S15: That's How I Work

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/10/03

This episode started while I was trying to work something out.Maybe part of what I was working out is what happens when I stop shrinking myself.I don't need to make a declarative statement about my absolute value. Not here. Not to anyone.Other people get to decide what I mean to them.But if you give me unclear information, I may ask what you mean. And if you don't want to clarify it, that's okay too.We can leave it there.Meanwhile, I keep making things.Apparently that's how I

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01:56:59

E8: Drawing a Line; S15: And Crossing Over It. Was it...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/10/02

If you are reading this after listening to the episode, congratulations.You have reached the archive.And, like every archive, this one has been curated.Here is roughly what happened.Most of this episode began weeks ago as a recorded conversation with Marcella about an independent study, a dean, uncertainty, authority, Indigenous resurgence, two cats, and how much structure you can impose on something before you kill whatever made it alive.One piece of context matters more than I originally

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01:11:42

E7: John Cage Made Me Love Everybody; S15: I Want to...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/30

Before this episode was released, the author sent its cover image to a couple of people close to him, along with the following note:“They get put on a ship to fly to the cosmic microwave background, but it’s going to take thousands of inbreeding generations. But, they are already inbred, so whatever.”This was not sent as a spoiler, exactly.It was more like an attempt to explain why Prince Harry and Meghan Markle appear to be floating in low gravity while strange aliens investigate them with a level

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00:54:21

E6: He Looked Like You to Me; S15: What Did He Look...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/27

I have a slight fear that explaining this episode will cause me to add something else to it, and I don’t want to. It already seems finished.So this is just information about how it happened.About two weeks ago, I spent an afternoon being a gremlin on Substack. I fed some of what I was doing into AI, asked it to find patterns, and eventually had it make a song out of the whole thing. Then I asked it to criticize that song. Then I criticized the criticism. Somewhere in there, an old song I wrote

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01:08:22

E5: Well, This Was Surprising; S15: Exactly what I've...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/26

I made this while walking home.That is becoming a fairly unremarkable sentence for me to write, which may itself be part of the problem.This one started in one place, moved through several others, and eventually seemed to arrive somewhere I had not known I was going.There is strategic planning in here. Fort Knox. Masculinity. Naloxone. Fentanyl. Benzodiazepines. Caffeine. Medical Assistance in Dying. Sensitivity. The possibility that some people can withstand more chaos than others. The possibility

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00:38:08

E4: The Edge Came With Him; S15: The Bads the Worses...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/23

I have instructed the AI writing this description to deliver a message on my behalf.If the maybes, perhapses, I-thinks, I-don’t-knows, caveats, qualifications, equivocations and occasional immediate reversals in this episode bother you, please fuck off.Pleasantly.I don’t mean leave forever. You can come back. Maybe.But I am not going to clean up uncertainty before speaking just so everything arrives looking like I knew where I was going.In this episode I walk home from work and somehow get from

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00:32:54

E3: Emergent Properties of Chaotic Systems; S15:...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/22

So, the description of this one is simple:Oh my dear friend. I am just me. Isn't that true?We start with an art song about emergence from chaos. Then we have a three body problem monologue. Finally, we end with the problem of three bodies.Me, my niece, and the universe.

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00:35:08

E2: Kafka Goes to the Castle; S15: And You'd Think...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/21

This might be kind of boring to read, but I thought it needed a description. I just asked AI to somehow convince you that this episode is a perfect weave of Van Gogh, Kafka, Rimbaud and Nietzsche.We could throw in Ionesco too, as I'm quite sure a Large Language Model would be able to figure out why. Was it because Ionesco thought one could argue anything from any piece of work?Well, I wanted to see if the Large Language Model could outdo him, and I could win the Trifecta... if only it was four

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00:44:12

E1: Unfiction; S15: Endless Orgasmic Arc Forever (Of...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/20

A little factual housekeeping, but first I should probably destroy the idea of factual housekeeping.This fact-check has been assembled by an AI. I was not at Pomona in 1971, Stonewall in 1969, the APA vote in 1973, the first AIDS cases in Los Angeles, our immigration medical exams, or yesterday in the driveway.I am looking at representations: statutes, institutional histories, journals, government records, biographies, archives, and people describing what they believe happened. I can give more

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00:34:04

E10: Low-Entropy Presence; S14: A Perfect Finale to...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/20

Somewhere in this episode, I say that you don’t need professional boundaries if you have good personal boundaries.I stand by it as a deliberately clickbait-y tool for making people think.Less provocatively: Professional rules cannot substitute for personal boundaries. Strong personal boundaries allow professional relationships to remain flexible and human without becoming exploitative or chaotic.The rest also prompted an AI-generated deep-dive podcast I used to stress-test the episode before

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00:16:32

E9: What Do You Do with a Confession of Something...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/20

Content note: Explicit language and discussion of incest fantasies, masturbation, childhood sexual fantasy, suicide, possible sexual abuse, illness, and death.The title of this episode is uncomfortable. The artwork may be worse: three tissue boxes labeled “Masturbation,” “Learning,” and “AI Slop,” with a hand trying to decide which one to reach for beneath the question, “What do you do with a confession of something like incest?”The implication that someone might masturbate to such a confession is

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00:13:38

E8: Tell Me to Wait; S14: Cute Boy, Lucky Day

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/19

It’s been more than a week since my last episode—the longest silence since I started this podcast. After months of releasing something almost every day (and sometimes three or four things in a day), I reached a point where the episodes I was making began to feel repetitive. They were still useful and necessary for me to make, but I wasn’t sure they all needed to reach a listening audience in quite the same way.So I waited.In that space, I watched some Japanese BL, thought about bad luck, cute boys,

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00:29:10

E7: Humanity is the Solution's Problem; S14: Or Tony...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/08

What this episode may be saying is that I am trying to figure out what to do with my life.So rather than describe the episode, I am going to present some possible answers for what I’m supposed to do with my life, based entirely on the evidence contained herein.Here are the top 15 candidates for how I’m doing with figuring that out:Make things. Apparently the effort required to make something difficult gives me pleasure, especially when I think it worked.Make unnecessary things. Necessary things

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00:17:49

E6: Oops, I Exceeded Reality Again; S14: Jury Duty...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/06

A friend of mine from high school recently discovered Suno.Apparently there had been some kind of assault, or accusation, or altercation—I’m still not entirely clear—and afterward somebody involved sent him a series of spectacularly deranged text messages.So naturally he put them into Suno.The result was techno.My response was that I liked it, but wanted it to be approximately thirteen hours longer, with one hit of acid and two hits of ecstasy.He replied:Same.Which brought something back.In the

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00:25:48

E5: Hyper-Focus Disorder Street Fighter; S14: Yet...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/06

I have made another thing that I really like, which is inconvenient because I have absolutely no time to promote it. Apparently making things and telling people that you made them are two separate jobs. I have barely agreed to do the first one.I especially like the cover. It features a reimagined version of a guy I was completely obsessed with when I was young. It carries some of his general voltage without looking enough like him that he could reasonably appear and say, “What are you doing? Why are

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00:39:54

E4: This Is How I Spend My Evenings (Lucky Me!); S14:...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/09/03

Every time the author describes an episode, the description threatens to become another episode requiring a song, a description—becoming another episode.So he delegated to AI:Entertain the people. Fact-check the loose bits. Fine.First: the author is usually careful about uncertainty. Things that sound questionable in isolation are often introduced with “I think,” “maybe,” “let’s imagine,” “or at least that’s how I remember it,” and “I don’t know if I got any of that correct.” Those qualifications

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00:25:33

E3: Sex, Sex, Sex and a Phone; S14: Non-Suggestive...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/08/30

You do realize this episode is called Sex, Sex, Sex and a Phone, right?And the artwork has a blue-haired guy on a telephone while a cute Vietnamese guy stands behind him making spring rolls.So naturally you might assume this episode is mostly about sex, telephones, or Vietnamese spring rolls.It is not.Those things are definitely in there. Eventually.Have you ever wondered what happens if you start talking with absolutely no idea where you're going?In this episode, you're going to find

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00:32:41

E2: Statistically Significant Ant City; S14: Why not...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/08/30

This episode begins with a very comforting question:What is the worst that could happen?I actually like that question.I remember watching a video with Peter Zeihan and several younger people who seemed to have come up through his orbit, all trying to work out what a plausible version of deglobalization, demographic decline, supply-chain disruption, and general societal wobbling might look like.Which I found reassuring.Not because I want civilization to collapse.I just like knowing where the floor

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00:20:46

E1: Teen Help Line; S14: Sigh... Narrow Shoulders...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/08/30

A special hello to anyone who clicked because you saw Dolly Parton on the cover.I understand.Dolly died this week, at 80, and I don't think we quite knew what that was going to feel like until it happened.For me, it has had something of the quality of the Challenger explosion. Maybe it even exceeded it—not because the events are comparable, obviously, but because of what they do to the emotional atmosphere. Challenger happened while I was working on a teen helpline, and that night people called

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00:36:57

E10: Bringing a Knife to the Edge; S13: Clickbait...

Danger, Vicious Dog ·

2026/08/29

I accidentally made the artwork for the last episode and this episode into one picture.Which is either a mistake, a concept, or a very efficient use of resources.The last episode was supposed to have the happy kid from Human Relations Camp, the homemade Costa is Gross banner, the little green Go light, all that teenage optimism and category-making and trying to figure out what identity even is.This one was supposed to have the motorcycle.The rainy street.The HOT_L sign with the E burned out.Hourly

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