PODCAST

CALL CHELSEA PERETTI

Chelsea Peretti

Give a call and see what happens 213.789.7589

comedy

All Episodes

67:03

BRINGING LYMIE BACK

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2025/09/20

Justin Timberlake’s Lyme diagnosis, chamomile lemon cake discourse, grieving a cat who isn’t dead yet, a drag king inquiry, and more. Chelsea emanates love, opines on Threads teasers, and plans to do five planks but only remembers to do two.

01:02:44

DUPES OF HAZZARD

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2025/08/22

Callers call from parking lots and a man shares his journey away from Conservatism. Singing about condiments. Boomer parents. Emotional regulation. A loner surfer indulges a convo about riptides and risotto. Chelsea's triceps are beginning to show minor definition and her eyeliner is far from perfect, which you can see on Patreon.

01:15:07

HAMSTRUNG

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2025/08/03

Chelsea attempts to explore journaling but gets sidetracked by a woman with five kids, a Uber Eats driver actively on a delivery, a toy commercial maker, and more. Food tests are back.

01:16:47

TWO OPENINGS

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2025/07/01

Wearing a shirt she dreamed she wore, Chelsea has a rip roarin time with some excellent callers. A dissection of genres of internet posts. A special ability to aerate hot food, 90s toaster oven nostalgia, a desire to be around smart and nice people, bra surveillance, some dance, some songs, wildly drawn-out courtroom yarn, and finally… A MALE CALLER!!

01:11:28

DEBUT NOVELIST

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2025/06/17

Chelsea debuts her new career direction as she continues to chase a Pullitzer. An east coast bartender, a mom getting chemo, a literary section, a reflection on blueberries, several calls for help, Costco, and a lot of discontent.

01:34:30

A VERY CHINTZY EPISODE

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2025/06/01

Carey is radicalized by Fire Island and drops multiple Dorinda references in this very special, very chintzy episode. His magical tale of going septic and wearing a stent and purse of antibiotics and subsequent digestive woe. Toenail removal and a discussion of disturbing doctors. A lengthy analysis of sunflowers. Conversely, shocking caller opinions on roses. Carey shares dog perfume tips. An exploration of flat Christina Aguilera karaoke. Many helpful PSAs.

01:01:02

TRYING TO CATCH A VIBE

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2025/05/18

Chelsea chats with a mightily prestigious crop of guests: an opera choreographer with a hot restaurant tip, a pottery buyer who appraises her piece, and a licensed therapist (presumably) who assesses Chelsea. Discussion of vitello tonnato, sand dunes, pottery accounts, mothers day, and underground parking lots. Chelsea's continued attempts at piquing caller interest in escape rooms effectively fails.

01:06:55

WINDY WILLIAMS

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2025/05/04

Chelsea stands on a cliff in the blustery wind and howls out about hair salon culture, brain rot, writing, boredom, science, explosive news, therapy, love languages, Tate Larae, a brain surgeon and a friend of a friend calls in! A caller celebrates his Fourthcalliversary by negging Chelsea, educating her about basic geography, and soliciting dog custody advice.

01:00:33

CAVEMEN DIDN'T MAKE POTTERY???

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2025/04/20

Slime and Charcoal chicken obsessed Chelsea and Sabrina freestyle about an upcoming live show endeavor, create TGIF acronyms, argue about chicken soup, discuss color mixing, debt, art, parenting, blah blah blah. Chelsea speaks to some senior who was bullied by a freshman.

02:02:34

FECAL MATTERS

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2025/03/30

Robby Hoffman, who has 9 siblings, throws Chelsea into the perpetual reaction seat with innumerable hot takes, such as: skin care is a scam, washing hands is bad, trans people are fine, ADHD doesn't exist, etc. Chelsea searches for points of connection, like grilled cheese, a mistrust of Nest, a dislike of cut fruit, and thinking flowers are beautiful. A caller does an unauthorized infomercial for a jeweler.

01:39:00

TURN LAFFED

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2025/03/16

Carmen Christopher joins Chelsea for a chaotic episode full of slime, snacks, and conspiracy theories. They talk about Manson expressions, ADHD vs. meditation, and whether slime could end wars, while Carmen’s mom mistakes Chelsea for Chelsea Handler. There’s water chugging, prank calls, limes full of boogers, and a passionate debate about soup.

01:49:29

NOTHING TO DO BUT SING

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2025/03/02

Chelsea struggles with restless leg syndrome and on-camera tics while discussing fires, karaoke, crying hangs, Canada's age, AI, shark attacks, ADHD, pottery perfectionism, sinus issues, a long term plan for escaping the algo, going grey, the power of bird song, and Western medicine inflating life expectancy. A caller sings Mariah from a subway platform. An "apolitical" caller from Texas shares about stealing eggs. A caller offers a lifechanging food test. Wolf howls.

01:51:34

ASTHMA & CALAMITIES (AND ASMR)

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2025/02/02

patreon.com/callchelseaperetti Chelsea explores ASMR—crunchy snacks, plastic sounds, and the perils of ASMR gatekeeping—while fielding calls on parenting through calamities, AQI confusion, and the fleeting magic of sumo oranges. A caller stuck in traffic gets pulled into an immigration deep dive and sings classical Indian music, Chelsea contemplates the hamster wheel of social media, liberals hating each other, and whether a pig eating Pop Rocks would be the ultimate ASMR. Along the way, she hangs

01:32:59

T.G.I.F.

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2025/01/13

A rousing episode recorded before the holidays where Chelsea devises some stellar new acronyms for T.G.I.F. Turkish oil wrestling, unarchiving lost songs for the pod, a truly random person calls in and MORE. See full video for this episode at patreon.com/callchelseaperetti

01:23:07

GODDESS OF HANGING UP

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2024/12/29

patreon.com/callchelseaperetti A lady calls from Vegas and we delve into the consequences of the Sphere. Chelsea tries to make her voice melodic and largely fails. A mesmerizing meditation on raccoon feces and deadly oysters. A classic Diddy / Ani convo. Alabama BBQ.

01:50:57

LIVE AT LARGO: 12 YEAR ANNI

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2024/12/15

patreon.com/callchelseaperetti Eavesdrop on a gathering of opinionated minds… and mouths… in this very special live anniversary episode of beloved podcast: Call Chelsea Peretti. Shocking audience polls that will leave you shaken to your core. A game! A reading of a letter young CP penned to SNL (and other memorabilia from times of yore). Inflammatory live taste tests. An audience expert on legumes and a woman who has eaten Schav in Minsk. A conclusion that promises to leave a lasting question-mark

01:09:11

INSTERNET / YOUR MOM PAYS YOUR PHONE BILL

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2024/12/01

Positive-minded yogi Rachel Grant Jackson of Chelsea's collegiate improv troupe "Six Milks" visits the pod on a day in which the coff is particularly a-crankin.

55:56

PILOT: DID YOU GET MY LETTER? (REMASTER)

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2024/11/24

Original airdate: 10.09.2012 In this already classic pilot episode Chelsea takes the temp of her callers: the son of a white supremacist, a weird German dude, a pizza delivery girl, The Kid Mero (her only friend in the Bronx), and more. Debut of Coffee Crankin Thru My Sys song.

01:17:32

THROAT LOSANGEZES

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2024/11/17

In this first CCP ep back as an indie podcast, you will restart your journey and reconnect with your deepest self. Thank you, as always, to the callers and listeners.

40:45

CUTEST LIL COHOST

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2024/07/04

Chelsea and her dog discuss squeaky sounds, documentarys (Tell Them You Love Me), Rie Parenting, and assess inventory of how product is moving. Also: grama impressions, hummingbird asmr, big dogs. A blood pants customer calls to discuss carbon underwear. Chelsea tries to speak italian to the probable great shame of her ancestors. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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