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PODCAST

Keeping Records

In 1977, NASA sent the Voyager into space with two records known as the “Golden Records.” On them were recordings of notable historic music, evocative nature sounds, and murmurs from contemporary life, all used to paint a picture of humanity and the world at large. Things have changed a lot since 1977, so Caleb Hearon and Shelby Wolstein are trying their hand at an update. They"re talking with comedians, musicians, and the like about what they would include on their own “golden record” if a new one

comedy comedy interviews

All Episodes

81:11

The Irish Goodbye (with Producer Anya and Producer...

Keeping Records ·

2022/10/28

"I hope you never lose your sense of wonder,You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger, May you never take one single breath for granted, God forbid love ever leave you empty handed, I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean, Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens, Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance, And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance. I hope you dance... I hope you dance... I hope you never fear those mountains in the

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98:41

Haunt Me, Paul (with Sam Sanders)

Keeping Records ·

2022/10/21

An episode full of shocking revelations. Someone in the room (EJ) has never been to TGI Friday's. Someone else in the room (Shelby) thinks Taylor Swift is a psychopath. And someone else in the room (our guest Sam Sanders [It's Been a Minute, Vibe Check, Into It]) didn't know that Jason Mraz says he's Mr. A to Z because Mr. A to Z spells... Mraz . Also we rarely get this topical/controversial but if you're looking for a primer on the entire DWD drama between Oliv*a and H*rry and J*son, we've got a

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85:26

Vermonster (with Allison Raskin)

Keeping Records ·

2022/10/14

Shelby gets a little philosophical. Allison helps us get a little introspective. And EJ has chapped lips. Allison Raskin (writer/director/comedian/YouTuber/podcaster/mental health advocate!!!) is here for some high brow, some low brow, some pure comedy gold. And the artifacts? Ohhhh these artifacts. You don't see artifacts like these every day. There's music and movies and food and warm feelings, which (we hope) are all the aliens' favorite things (fingers crossed). Also, our source at NASA has all

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86:47

The Town Crier (with George Civeris and Sam Taggart)

Keeping Records ·

2022/10/07

Well looky who we have here: it's the literal titans of the heterosexual podcasting world, George Civeris and Sam Taggart (Straightiolab). To keep things super duper straight this episode, the gang discuss Reese Witherspoon, owls, Lady Gaga, taking a nice long walk in the fall, and then circling back to Reese Witherspoon again. The aliens also get the BOGO deal of a lifetime with two sets of artifacts rocketing off into space: George's Artifacts: The Final Scene Of The Movie Wild (Film

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84:59

Church Giggles (with Paul F. Tompkins)

Keeping Records ·

2022/09/30

Things discussed: tortoises, sperm whales, elephant seals, octopi, persian cucumbers, regular cucumbers, gerkins, Lindsay Lohan in The Parent Trap. Things not discussed: why EJ is training his cat, and what techniques he is using to achieve his goals. And who better to discuss and not discuss these things with than professional discusser Paul F. Tompkins (Comedy Bang Bang!, Threedom, Mr. Show)??? Blessed to have him grace the Keeping Records studios with this hyper-specific list of space-bound

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99:44

My Name is Mother (with Jon Gabrus)

Keeping Records ·

2022/09/23

Anya (who writes these episode descriptions, hello) finally gets a long awaited and much deserved apology from Shelby, in absentia. I guess I had to fly across the country to give Shelby the distance she needed to make amends. I've forgiven and I've forgotten. While I was away, Shelby and EJ decided the podcast is perfect (true) and that the funniest person in the world is Jon Gabrus (also true). He stopped by to talk about how super awkward it is to have a sleepover at someone else's house at a

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90:22

Gay Is This (with Bridger Winegar)

Keeping Records ·

2022/09/16

You know what feels nice? When a guest takes this assignment seriously for once. Many thanks to Bridger Winegar (Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Black Monday, I Said No Gifts!) for putting his personal and professional life on hold for a month to prep for this episode, curating and revising a list of artifacts, and agonizing over making a good alien-first-impression to answer what will undoubtedly be their first question: what is gay? Bridger's Artifacts: Carol of the Bells (Audio) Wave Race 64 (Video

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94:47

Stick to the Shore (with Chuck Bryant)

Keeping Records ·

2022/09/09

This episode is for our sweet n earnest lil freaks ONLY. We mean it!!!! If you're not prepared to shed a tear as longtime podcaster/friend of the show/loving dad Chuck Bryant talks about his favorite episode of his kid's favorite TV show, you should probably turn back now!!!! (OK, now that it's just us sweethearts, we can tell you about the rest of the episode: Shelby comes up with a plan for getting lost in a crowd, EJ pulls out an obscure metaphor never uttered before by man or extra-terrestrial,

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76:14

All Roads Lead to Rome (with Nicole Byer)

Keeping Records ·

2022/09/02

Welcome to the thunderdome: this week, it's hosts vs. producers as we battle for historical accuracy in the space where it matters most, the intro to this podcast. Sound off/take sides in the comments. Then, Nicole Byer (Why Won't You Date Me?, Nailed It!, Grand Crew) fits us into her busy schedule this week (she flies to London every morning to workout with her British trainer, Ben, which eats up a lot of time actually) to discuss alien buttholes and what notes she would have given Kim K on that

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103:45

One of Our Funniest Murderers (with Jamie Loftus)

Keeping Records ·

2022/08/26

Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, welcome back. We have perhaps never meant it to more??? Keeping Records is all the way back, with the new EJ and the old Shelby and all that record-making you love or hate or agree with or disagree with or tolerate. And could we have asked for a better first guest back than comedian/writer/podcaster-to-the-stars Jamie Loftus? No we could not. Finally all together in the studio, the gang puzzled over some really important questions like: Should

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70:08

Best Of: The First 75 Episodes

Keeping Records ·

2022/08/19

The moment you've all been waiting for... an episode long in the making.... the Keeping Records phone has been ringing off the hook.... audiences have been begging....... for Anya and Casey to step up to the mic. Also in this episode: all your favorite moments in Keeping Records history, according to you. Eat it up, lil freaks!!!!! And don't forget that we're BACK NEXT WEEK, August 26th, WITH A BRAND NEW EPISODE!!!!! Hallelujah. Follow the show @keepingrecordspod Advertise on Keeping Records via

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71:01

I See Two Holes Right Now (with E.R. Fightmaster)...

Keeping Records ·

2022/08/12

OK tiny freaks! This is our very last re-release before a very special episode next week (!) and an even more special (!!) episode the week after. So hang tight, stay tuned, don't touch that dial. We're almost back, baby. Actor, producer, and writer E.R. Fightmaster takes great issue with the premise of Keeping Records. And the issue is that the show shouldn't be about educating the aliens on humanity—it's about making the aliens feel how we feel. And that means the aliens need to feel perplexed by

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8:32

A Lil Update!!!!!!

Keeping Records ·

2022/08/05

Your burning questions????? Finally answered!!!! Smash that play button in to hear what we've been up to over at the KR HQ!!!! Watch the video version of the episode Follow the show @keepingrecordspod Advertise on Keeping Records via Gumball.fm See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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34:30

Bonus Episode: The Voyager Artifacts

Keeping Records ·

2022/07/29

All right, settle in lil freaks, we're wheeling in the AV cart for a very special session of Keeping Records. Yes, that's right, we're gonna dim the lights and sit quietly in our chairs while Caleb and Shelby tell us about some of the artifacts that NASA sent (without our input weirdly) on the original Voyager Golden Record. We'll learn about things that seem funny to us but normal to people in other parts of the world, we'll learn about fetuses and how that all works more or less, we'll learn that

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75:12

It's Not For You (with Beth Stelling) [Re-release]

Keeping Records ·

2022/07/22

Give us a minute, OK? Keeping Records is on a brief hiatus but you better believe it's coming back. Stay tuned for updates from their latest mission, dropping in your feeds soon. Comedian and podcaster Beth Stelling ordered some sandwiches...like...an hour ago. They're still not here yet but she's going to go ahead and get started telling Caleb and Shelby her plans for her Golden Record: people falling over and hurting themselves but like not reaaaally hurting themselves, her niece meeting a

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69:36

Don't Broke What's Not Broken

Keeping Records ·

2022/07/15

Hey it's Caleb and Shelbo! Back with the long-awaited Golden Record from our main girl! Shelbo takes a while to find her camera but when she does, she FINALLY sets the record straight (in a gay way): we're taking a brief chhhiatus (a Jewish break), but we will be back with new episodes in a few weeks. So don't you dare hit that unsubscribe button, because we've got so much more Keeping Recordings for you. More news coming in this feed next week. To tide you over 'til then, Shelbo's artifacts: When

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64:49

Time of Your Life

Keeping Records ·

2022/07/08

Good morning America (or wherever you're listening from, hopefully from a different planet)! The long awaited Golden Record from our one and only Caleb Hearon is finally here. It's a bittersweet symphony as we go through a lot of feelings. Queue Vitamin C… and let us know… F/K Jason Segal and Vince Vaughn. Caleb's Artifacts The feeling of unrequited love, as expressed by "I Can Love You Better" by The Chicks (audio) They pushed me down and maced me Animaniacs (audio-visual) The blowjob scene

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56:40

Mommy is Home

Keeping Records ·

2022/07/01

They're back from their meeting with NASA; seems like things went well. Now, Caleb's in New York, and Shelby's in LA. But the Zoom that connects them through the cosmos? That's Mommy, and Mommy is home. They play F/M/K with the Supreme Court (answers open to interpretation) and then open up the submission line to solicit additions/deletions for the Golden Record, and as usual you lil freaks did not disappoint. Covering a real wide breadth of the most pressing issues of our time, we have the

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77:27

Night is for the Freaks (with Samantha Irby)...

Keeping Records ·

2022/06/24

Well lil freaks, it finally happened. We got the call last week on the secure Headgum line (red phone) from Bill Nelson (head of NASA, reports to POTUS, first coined the phrase "Houston, we have a problem") and Caleb and Shelby are on their way to the John F. Kennedy Space Center for an important meeting and we are not cleared to give you any other info (strictly need-to-know basis at this time). Anyway, while that's all happening, we unearthed from the archives one of our all-time favorite episodes

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86:23

Old Meme Energy (with EJ Marcus)

Keeping Records ·

2022/06/17

Shelby's back in studio (missed you, girl!); Caleb's finally on Raya (congrats, girl!); and EJ Marcus stops by the pod to kind of randomly make fun of producer Anya (who is actually writing this description but totally forgives you, girl!). After all, EJ is, by their own admission, Mean, Scary, Tall, and Intimidating. Mean, Scary, Tall, and Intimidating EJ brought along a near-perfect Golden Record that is at once practical and... dare we say... provocative? Listen in for arguably the best

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