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PODCAST

Beyond The Surface

Samantha Sellers

Welcome to Beyond the Surface, where being seen means being understood. Here, we explore the ups and downs of exploring and sometimes losing faith and community, and the healing power of shared stories. This is a safe space to connect, share, and find support in our common experiences of religious trauma and leaving fundamental communities. Join us as we build a community of understanding and connection. Host - Sam Sellers; Therapist specialising in Religious Trauma and the Queer

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All Episodes

01:13:53

Behind the Curtain: The Systematic Power of Megachurches

Beyond The Surface ·

2026/01/28

In this episode, Sam sits down with Scott, a journalist and author, to discuss his latest book examining the rise of megachurches and their ties to Christian nationalism. Scott shares his experiences growing up in a Southern Baptist megachurch and explores the power dynamics that often leave congregants feeling voiceless. The conversation highlights systemic issues within megachurch culture, including the exploitation of members, the use of hope as a tool of control, and the consequences of silence

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01:30:05

From Faith to Freedom: Leaving an Abusive Marriage

Beyond The Surface ·

2026/01/21

In this episode, I’m joined by Louise for a raw and honest conversation about intimate partner abuse, faith, and the long road back to self-trust. Louise shares how love, control, and religious beliefs became tangled together, making it hard to recognise abuse while she was inside it. We talk about the ways faith and religious language can be used to justify manipulation, silence doubt, and keep people stuck in harmful relationships, as well as the deep confusion that comes from trying to reconcile

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55:02

The Cost of Being Queer in a Fundamental Church Part Two

Beyond The Surface ·

2026/01/14

In part two of Chris’s story, we explore the shift from denial to self-acceptance as a queer person shaped by faith. Chris reflects on how embracing authenticity accelerated his journey, and how connecting with others who had already walked this path made healing feel possible. We talk about the grief that comes with recognising lost time spent under shame, conversion ideologies, and trying to survive within unsafe religious systems, as well as the complexity of redefining relationships built around

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01:29:24

The Cost of Being Queer in a Fundamental Church Part One

Beyond The Surface ·

2026/01/07

This episode explores the impact of religious trauma on personal identity, focusing on Chris’s experience as a queer person raised within fundamentalist Christianity. Chris reflects on growing up in a Charismatic Baptist church, where emotionally intense healing practices and fear-based teachings shaped his early understanding of faith and selfhood. He shares how messages about sexuality, particularly the framing of homosexuality as broken or demonic deeply affected his mental health, contributing

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25:50

Bonus - Navigating Nostalgia: A Reflection on...

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/12/14

This episode delves into the complexities of navigating the Christmas season, particularly for individuals grappling with religious trauma. I reflect on both nostalgia and discomfort that arises during this festive period, articulating what I miss from my past experiences within a church context, alongside the burdens I no longer wish to bear. The conversation emphasises the duality of memory; acknowledging the beauty in the rituals and community while simultaneously rejecting the pressures and

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01:33:17

What 'Secret Lives of Mormon Wives' Reveals About Trauma

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/12/08

In this bonus episode, Sam sits down with ex-Mormon therapists Ashley and Melissa to unpack the latest season of Secret Lives of Mormon Wives through the lens of religious trauma and deconstruction. Drawing from both their lived experience and clinical work, they discuss the heavier themes woven through the show; sexual assault, childhood trauma, purity culture, and the emotional toll of life inside a high-control religious system. Ashley shares how confronting it can be to watch stories that echo

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01:07:49

The Ones Deconstructing Faith & Parenting - Liz &...

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/11/26

In this follow-up episode, Liz and Jesse open up about parenting after faith deconstruction, an experience filled with both healing and unlearning. They reflect on how leaving a high-control church reshaped their ideas of authority, discipline, and what it means to raise kids with curiosity instead of fear. Through personal stories, they share the challenges of guiding children who question everything and the beauty in watching them form their own beliefs. Together, they unpack the shift from

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01:16:48

The Ones Who Deconstructed While Married - Liz &...

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/11/19

Liz and Jesse join us for a deeply honest conversation about what it means to deconstruct faith while rebuilding a relationship that began inside a high-control church. Liz shares her experience growing up as a pastor’s daughter and the shock of discovering her father’s double life, a revelation that shattered her worldview. Jesse reflects on his eclectic spiritual background and the dissonance of questioning the beliefs that once defined him. Together, they unpack the toll of purity culture, the

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01:12:19

The One Bringing An AuDHD Lens to Deconstruction

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/11/12

Jeremy shares his experience of growing up within a strict Lutheran sect, offering a candid look at how faith, identity, and his late AuDHD diagnosis intersected throughout his life. From early moments of doubt at just ten years old to the long process of deconstruction that followed, Jeremy reflects on the challenges of navigating a belief system that often discouraged questioning and individuality. The conversation explores how environments rooted in rigid doctrine can stifle self-expression and

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01:18:43

The MLM Cult Survivor

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/11/05

In this episode, Brandie opens up about her experience within a commercial cult operating under the guise of a multi-level marketing (MLM) scheme. She reflects on the allure of belonging and empowerment that initially drew her in, and the eventual disillusionment that came with realising the manipulative dynamics at play. Brandie explores the guilt, fear, and loss of autonomy that many, especially young mothers face in these high-control environments. Her journey of leaving the MLM world and

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01:14:02

The Cult Survivor Who Wont Be Silenced

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/10/29

In this powerful episode, Cheryl shares her courageous journey of escaping the Exclusive Brethren, a high-control religious community marked by isolation and fear. Born into a life defined by strict rules and emotional repression, Cheryl recounts her childhood in rural Saskatchewan, revealing experiences of sexual abuse, indoctrination, and deep psychological control. Leaving the group at just 17, she began the long, painful process of reclaiming her freedom and sense of self. Through raw honesty

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01:21:53

The Ex-Mormon Therapist

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/10/22

Raised in an unorthodox Mormon family, Ashley shares her journey of navigating faith, identity, and the pressures of patriarchal religious structures. In this conversation, she reflects on the tension of growing up with a non-Mormon father, the weight of expectations within her community, and the shame that often accompanied rigid doctrine. Now a therapist specialising in religious trauma, Ashley offers candid insight into the process of deconstructing harmful beliefs, reclaiming identity, and

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01:21:56

The One Who Went From Being A Blessing To Being Shunned

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/10/15

Shunned after leaving the Geelong Revival Center, Jodie shares her journey from the insular world of fundamentalist faith to a more expansive and authentic sense of self. She reflects on the love and community she once knew, alongside the rigid expectations and lack of critical thought that shaped her childhood. Candidly exploring the pain of shunning and the challenge of rebuilding relationships, Jodie offers a powerful story of resilience, healing, and the courage it takes to reclaim identity

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01:20:27

The One Who Went From Golden Child To Scapegoat

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/10/08

Lauren’s story begins with the role of golden child, expected to keep the peace in a high-control family by silencing her own needs and striving for parental approval. Over time, this weight collided with her growing awareness of politics and social justice, sparking questions that clashed with her upbringing and eventually led to estrangement. Her journey captures both the grief of losing family ties and the strength found in choosing authenticity, offering hope to anyone navigating the painful,

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01:15:43

The Suburban Witch

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/10/01

Hana, known online as the Suburban Witch, shares her journey of deconstructing a Pentecostal upbringing in Australia and the lasting impact of religious trauma. The conversation explores her childhood experiences of indoctrination, including purity culture, conformity, and the pressure to tie self-worth to rigid belief systems. Hana reflects on the psychological toll of growing up in a high-control religious environment and the courage it takes to reclaim identity beyond it. Through her story,

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01:04:58

The One Who Survived IBLP

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/09/24

In this episode, Rachel shares her story of being immersed into the IBLP (Institute in Basic Life Principles), where the teachings of Bill Gothard shaped her understanding of faith, identity, and community in deeply controlling ways. She reflects on how the subtle mechanisms of spiritual abuse left lasting impacts on her ability to trust, belong, and feel secure in herself, even after leaving. As Rachel traces her gradual disentanglement from the IBLP framework, she sheds light on the resilience

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01:16:31

The Asian American Apostate

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/09/17

In this episode, Scott, a Japanese American, reflects on his journey of navigating faith, race, and identity within evangelical Christianity. His parents adopted the church as a path to assimilation after the trauma of their own internment during World War II, a legacy that shaped his childhood in predominantly white spaces where he often felt alienated. While evangelicalism offered belonging, it also demanded conformity, leading Scott to eventually question its contradictions and begin the hard

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01:31:13

The One Who Escaped Providence

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/09/10

Sally shares her journey of recovering from her time in Providence, a high-control cult that exploited her search for belonging. From her childhood as a Vietnamese immigrant to the manipulative dynamics that drew her into the group, Sally reflects on how cults prey on vulnerability and maintain control through fear and psychological tactics. Her story sheds light on both the personal cost of spiritual abuse and the broader patterns of coercion within such movements. Through honesty and courage,

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01:19:32

The Sufi Cult Survivor

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/09/03

T shares their powerful story of spending over two decades in a coercive Sufi group and what it meant to finally walk away. We talk about the search for belonging that can draw people into high-control spaces, the manipulation and fear that keep them there, and the emotional cost of suppressing identity for the sake of faith.T reflects on cultic vows, spiritual betrayal, and the resilience it took to reclaim their truth and embracing their sexuality during the pandemic and navigating today’s hostile

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01:05:38

The One Who Divorced Religion

Beyond The Surface ·

2025/08/27

Janice shares her story of growing up in religion, specifically a Pentecostal family in Canada, where vibrant expressions of faith like speaking in tongues were part of daily life. Raised by parents transformed by their beliefs, she navigated the tension between familial love, purity culture, and the pull of individual identity, a journey that would eventually inspire her to write Divorcing Religion. Janice reflects on pivotal moments, from high school relationships that sparked a crisis of faith to

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111 results

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