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PODCAST

What the Actual Drake

Welcome to What the Actual Drake, the podcast where Ashley and Greg Drake try to make sense of adulthood in real time — with zero filters, questionable decisions, and a whole lot of laughter. From marriage and parenting to personal growth, petty arguments, and the everyday curveballs that keep life interesting, nothing is off‑limits, and everything is fair game. This isn’t a highlight reel. It’s the messy, honest, hilarious version of life that usually stays behind closed doors — except the Drakes

fiction comedy fiction

All Episodes

61:36

Are We Living in a Simulation… and Why Does My Dog...

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/09/29

Week 3 of football is officially in the books, so naturally we had to recap all the NFL and college football chaos before making our Week 4 predictions. 🏈Then we dive into our weekly life recap…which, for once, was suspiciously… boring. No major disasters, no spectacular chaos. Honestly, we’re a little concerned. 😂 We also get into the latest current events, TLDR.tech, Elon Musk’s Terafab plans in Texas, and somehow end up asking the most important question of all: how the hell does space

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86:07

Football, Faith & Fucking Dinosaurs

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/09/22

We’re covering NFL Week 2 & 3 predictions, college football upsets, and the sports chaos that comes with pretending we know what’s going to happen. Then things take a hard left turn into politics and religion as we talk about Trump’s newest project — the proposed arch in Arlington, organized religion, and Ash’s ongoing journey toward becoming agnostic after consuming approximately 47 too many religion-based documentaries. And yes… the LDS documentaries have officially entered the chat. 😳

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112:36

Can We Pass the Citizenship Test—or Just Pass Judgment?

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/09/15

College football is back, the NFL season is officially gearing up, and naturally… we went completely off the rails. 😂 This week on What the Actual Drake, we talk college ball, make our NFL season predictions, and get into the Lindsey Clancy mistrial and the complicated questions surrounding the case. Then somehow we end up talking about the U.S. citizenship test, what other countries expect from people becoming citizens, and all the random thoughts that happen when two people refuse to stay on

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79:29

Week 1 Picks & Giant-Ass Cockroaches

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/09/08

Ok Week 1 predictions, cyborg cockroaches, political chaos, and the first-world problems that raised us. 😂 We’re kicking off NFL season with our Week 1 score predictions, plus the latest sports updates and plenty of opinions nobody asked for. Then things take a hard left into cyborg cockroaches and the Space Force(what do they actually do?), because apparently reality has officially become a sci-fi movie. We also dive into Trump’s latest shenanigans… “Lake America”and the Good Good x Callaway

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192:35

13,000 Pieces of Millennial Chaos

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/09/01

This week on What the Actual Drake, we cover a little bit of everything, because apparently staying on one topic is not in our skill set. 😂We get into the latest current events and all the shit happening in the world, take a nostalgic trip down Millennial Memory Lane, and revisit the things that made growing up in the ’90s and early 2000s a completely different experience. We also survived a Vikings game that was so damn bad we left at halftime. 🫠🏈 Because sometimes you load up the whole fam for

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70:46

Candy, Chaos & Questionable Mad Libs

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/08/27

This week on What the Actual Drake, we’re talking football, current events, politics, sports, and all the other shit happening in the world that apparently we’re expected to have an opinion about. 😂We get into what’s looking good for the Pats this season, the state of the NFL, the latest political chaos, and the headlines that had us asking, “Wait… are we seriously doing this now?” And then… IT’S FINALLY HERE. We wrap up our ongoing creepy little role-playing adventure with the FINAL ACT

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60:05

The Aliens Have Better Job Security

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/08/18

This week on What the Actual Drake… we spiraled through the alleged gravity loss fail of 8/12/26, debated whether aliens are real (and, more importantly, whether they’ve already clocked in at work among politicians and Hollywood A-listers), and collectively agreed that NASA is probably not telling us the full story and is, at minimum, deeply suspicious. We also hit a millennial rapid-fire round of “what wouldn’t kids today understand,” ranging from dial-up internet rage to why you couldn’t just

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71:00

Just Another Totally Normal Episode

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/08/07

This week on WTAD, we’re checking in on… absolutely nothing new in sports (because apparently the sports world hit the snooze button⚾️), discussing the lack of action in WWE SummerSlam, and sharing what’s also not new in our work lives.Then we swap the office for the weekend, recapping a trip to Topgolf, trying out some new food spots, and the usual random adventures that somehow become stories. And then… there’s Act Two of our ongoing role-playing saga. What started as a weird adventure

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81:10

The Door Was Never Meant to Be Opened

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/07/28

This episode has everything. We kick things off with the biggest stories in sports: from the FIFA champions to the latest NBA trades, and share our takes on the winners, losers, and surprises. Then we switch gears into real life, diving into family drama and the Ash’s latest employment update, complete with the highs, lows, and moments that make you question humanity. But just when you think you’ve got us figured out…We take a hard left turn into an improvised role-playing adventure. Ashley finds

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86:48

Did CERN Jump Us to a New Universe? Wildfires,...

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/07/21

This week, we kicked things off with the FIFA World Cup before diving into some more personal updates, including Ashley’s upcoming job loss and what comes next. From there, things took a turn into conspiracy territory as we debated the wild “loss of gravity” theory, CERN, NASA, and whether there’s more going on than we’re being told. We also revisited the Mandela Effect, including the infamous Shazaam movie that half the internet swears existed. To wrap things up, Greg gave his thoughts after

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82:52

No Moral Compass, No Bingo Winnings

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/07/14

This week, we’re all over the map in the best way possible. We kick things off with the latest FIFA World Cup standings before sharing an update on Greg’s Duncan Crawler Carl journey. From there, we dive into a conversation about the state of society and what happens when people lose their moral compass, including the guy who took our kids' bingo winnings... gross. We also give you a behind-the-scenes look at our new podcast setup, discuss why obesity continues to run rampant in America, and break

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65:51

Chaos and Camping Disasters

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/07/07

The Fourth of July may be over, but we’re still unpacking the chaos. This week, we dive into the latest FIFA World Cup action, catch up on our ongoing Dungeon Crawler Carl obsession, and somehow end up deep in the rabbit hole of Minnesota lore. We also give a full recap of our holiday camping trip with the kids.. including everything that went sideways and the shocking discovery that our doodle is absolutely NOT built for tent camping. Between the kids, the dog, and the general campground chaos, it

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59:55

Side Quests and Explosive Tangents

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/07/03

The Loot Drop Nobody Asked For Welcome, crawler. You survived another week, which means you’ve unlocked a fresh episode full of questionable decisions, unnecessary tangents, and enough pop culture to confuse the AI overlords. This week’s loot includes Ash’s latest descent into demon smut, another progress report from the glorious madness that is Dungeon Crawler Carl, and why Audible continues to enable our reading addictions. We also stumble through World Cup chaos, recap a zoo adventure that

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122:57

Breaking News, Broken Workplaces, and Greg Breaks His...

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/06/23

This week, we dive into a little bit of everything.. breaking down the latest headlines, including the excitement surrounding the 2026 World Cup and the buzz around the Obama Presidential Center taking shape in Chicago. We also swap stories from the trenches of work life, share some corporate chaos, and discuss the everyday absurdities that somehow become normal. Just when you think we’re wrapping things up, Greg sends the conversation into an unexpected spiral with an existential crisis about

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74:00

Encrypted Gains & Digital Chains

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/05/19

In this episode, we dive headfirst into the digital age, where AI is evolving faster than most people can keep up, and figuring out what’s real online is becoming almost impossible. From there, the conversation turns darker. public surveillance, the slow disappearance of privacy, and what it means to live in a world where we’re constantly watched, tracked, and analyzed.Also, we cover Meta Platforms and the controversy surrounding changes to Instagram's encryption, and what that could mean for the

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74:41

We Went to the Zoo and Then Planned Our Divorce

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/05/05

In this week’s episode, we take a laid-back stroll through our weekend: from a fun adventure at the zoo, to reflecting on the progress of our health/fitness journeys. We also dive into Greg’s latest TV obsessions and what we’d do if we ever got a divorce.🤣 Tune in for a cozy, candid catch-up on all things life.

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1:09

The Fed, the Fear, and the Freakin’ Sausages

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/04/28

This mid-morning episode leans into the fuckery surrounding the Federal Reserve, exploring the conspiracy theories that claim it’s quietly controlling the economy behind the scenes. We connect the dots between money, power, and government corruption—asking how much is truth and how much is speculation.And because we refuse to take ourselves too seriously, we close it out with a few laughs about Yoga Hosers—because somehow tiny Nazi bratwursts and economic policy go hand in hand..

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92:58

Everything, Nothing, and Whatever This Is

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/04/21

It’s late, we’re tired, and somehow that’s when the best (and worst) ideas hit. In this episode, we spiral through conspiracy theories, random “what if” scenarios, and the kind of chaotic conversations that only make sense after midnight. From mildly believable to completely unhinged, nothing is off limits—and somehow we connect it all back to real life (sort of). Grab a snack, get cozy, and join us for a no-filter, sleep-deprived deep dive into… well, everything.

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94:00

Launching Into Space… and Trauma

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/04/14

This episode is a little bit of everything—in the best way. We kick things off with the Artemis 2 mission, the future of space exploration, and the UFL's expansion into Oklahoma. Then we get real, sharing personal experiences about growing up poor and navigating the challenges of becoming teen parents. From there, we lighten things up with a chat about upcoming movies we’re excited for, touch on some current news, and wrap it all together with the kind of random, unfiltered conversations that make

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96:40

Your children will be placed in the custody of Carl's...

What the Actual Drake ·

2026/04/07

This episode is a chaotic mix of real-life frustrations and hilarious hot takes. We start with the ups and downs of corporate life—from workplace politics to drama that makes you question everything (and everyone).Then we take a sharp turn into conspiracy territory, unpacking theories about “big food” and what might really be going on behind the scenes of what we eat. To top it all off, we connect the dots to Idiocracy- because honestly… is it starting to feel a little too real? It’s relatable,

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