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PODCAST

All of You

allofyoupodcast

Welcome to the All of You Podcast with Dave and Shiv Martinell! A few years and one too many fights ago, our relationship led us on personal journeys toward self awareness, healing, and personal growth. We started to see that the more we healed, the better we started showing up not just in our relationship, but in the workplace, in our friendships, with our daughters, and most importantly for ourselves. Our hope is that in sharing our own raw and vulnerable truths, others will be inspired, feel

education self-improvement

All Episodes

51:18

Ep.127 Becoming self aware is hard

All of You ·

2026/10/05

We all have subconscious patterns that shape the way we think, feel, and show up in our relationships. The tricky part is that you can’t change what you’re not conscious of, and staying conscious of ourselves in every moment is nearly impossible.In this episode, we talk about the messy, ongoing work of self-awareness and why becoming more conscious isn’t about getting it right all the time. It’s about noticing what’s happening, catching ourselves in old patterns, and choosing something different

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49:59

Ep.126 Why we get harsh with the ones we love

All of You ·

2026/09/28

Inspired by Terry Real’s quote, “there is nothing that harshness does that loving firmness doesn’t do better,” in this episode we’re taking a closer look at why we can get so harsh with the people we love. Where does it come from, and why does it seem to come out most when we really want to be heard?We talk about the difference between being direct, being firm, and being harsh, and how our old patterns can sneak into the way we communicate. Because even when you’ve asked a million times, getting

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51:57

Ep.125 Is the work actually working?

All of You ·

2026/09/21

How do you know if the work you’ve been doing is actually working? Healing isn’t always about feeling better or never getting triggered again. Sometimes the real results show up in how you respond, how you move through discomfort, and how you relate to yourself and others.In this episode, we talk about what it really means to measure your healing, how you know you’re growing, and why integration is such an important part of the process. Because doing the work is one thing, but actually living

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42:43

Ep.124 How Important Is Spiritual Alignment?

All of You ·

2026/09/14

What does it really mean to be spiritually aligned? And how important is it to share that alignment with your partner? Spirituality can shape the way we see ourselves, our relationships, and the decisions we make, but being aligned doesn’t necessarily mean believing or doing everything the same way.In this episode, we explore what spiritual alignment can look and feel like, how it shows up in relationships, and what happens when we learn to trust our own connection with God while also making space

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47:03

Ep.123 When doubt creeps into the relationship

All of You ·

2026/09/07

Doubt is bound to creep into every relationship at some point. Sometimes it’s an important signal that something needs our attention, and other times it’s our fear, uncertainty, or old wounds taking the wheel. The challenge is learning the difference.In this episode, we’re talking about what happens when doubt starts to take over. When we constantly question the relationship, look to our partner for reassurance, or let our doubts shape the way we connect with them. Because while listening to doubt

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57:43

Ep.122 What social media is doing to your relationship

All of You ·

2026/08/31

Social media has become such a normal part of our lives that it’s easy to forget how much it can shape the way we see ourselves, our partners, and our relationships. From comparison and jealousy, to how much we scroll, to the stories we create based on what we see online, it can have a bigger impact on our connection than we realize.In this episode, we’re talking about the ways social media can quietly influence our relationships, what it looks like when it starts creating disconnection, and how to

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48:19

Ep.121 Dealing with uncertainty

All of You ·

2026/08/24

Uncertainty is a part of life, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy to sit with. In this episode, we’re talking about the uncertainty that shows up in relationships, career, and life and what happens when our nervous system doesn’t know how to handle the unknown.We explore how uncertainty can live in the body, impact the way we connect with the people we love, and lead us to seek control or certainty when what we really need is the capacity to be with what we don’t know. Because sometimes the work isn’t

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46:55

Ep.120 How to know when to commit

All of You ·

2026/08/17

How do you know when it’s time to truly commit? In this episode, we talk about what it looks like to trust yourself enough to know that no matter what happens, you’ll be okay and how that changes the way you choose a partner and a relationship.We talk about being aligned in your values and what you want, choosing someone you’d be willing to go to war with, and what it really means to have an equal partner by your side. Because commitment isn’t about knowing everything will work out, it’s about

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44:24

Ep.119 When connection feels hard

All of You ·

2026/08/10

Sometimes in relationships, we’re simply not connected. And while disconnection is inevitable, what matters most is what we do with it. In this episode, we talk about why learning to be okay with moments of disconnection and resisting the urge to make them worse can actually be the key to finding our way back to each other.We explore what it looks like to give each other space without creating more distance, and how repair becomes possible when we stop fighting the disconnection and start trusting

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43:56

Ep.118 Human doing or human being?

All of You ·

2026/08/03

Have you ever felt like you've become one with your to-do list? In this episode, Shiv shares her own experience of realizing she'd slipped into constant "doing" mode, living in a state of stress instead of being present. We explore why this happens, how it impacts our ability to connect with the people we love, and what it looks like to slow down enough to actually experience the moments we're living. Ready to do the work and go deeper in your own healing? Book a consultation call with us or find

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44:26

Ep.117 The pressure we put on our partners

All of You ·

2026/07/27

We all have needs in our relationships, but what happens when we start expecting our partner to meet all of them? In this episode, we unpack the pressure we can unknowingly place on the person we love, why it happens, and how it can create resentment, disconnection, and impossible expectations. We also talk about the importance of learning to meet more of your own emotional needs, recognizing when your partner simply doesn't have the ability to show up in a particular season, and how shifting these

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47:38

Ep.116 The importance of how you view yourself

All of You ·

2026/07/20

How you see yourself shapes every part of your life and relationships, but what if that view isn't actually accurate? In this episode, we explore where self-perception comes from, why so many of us struggle to see ourselves clearly, and how our past experiences can distort the way we view who we are. We also talk about how to build a more honest, compassionate view of yourself so you can show up with greater confidence, freedom, and authenticity.Ready to do the work and go deeper in your own

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47:53

Ep.115 We're not okay and that's okay - living in a...

All of You ·

2026/07/13

In this deeply personal episode, we share about the recent loss of our brother-in-law after his battle with cancer and reflect on what grief has taught us—not just through this loss, but through many others we've experienced. We talk about what it means to live in a season of grief, how to support people who are hurting, and why healing often looks different than we expect. If you're carrying loss of any kind, we hope this conversation helps you feel a little less alone. Ready to do the work and

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43:39

Ep.114 What is right and wrong in relationships

All of You ·

2026/06/29

In relationships, we often spend so much energy trying to prove who's right and who's wrong. But what if that's the wrong question altogether? In this episode, we explore why healthy relationships aren't built by convincing your partner to see things your way. They're built by two people working together to create a relationship that works for both of them. We talk about letting go of rigid expectations, embracing differences, and finding solutions that honor each person's needs instead of trying to

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45:54

Ep.113 Why growth is more about letting go than...

All of You ·

2026/06/22

We live in a world obsessed with self-improvement and optimization, but growth isn't always about adding more. Sometimes the most meaningful transformation comes from letting go of the beliefs, patterns, and survival strategies that no longer serve us. In this episode, we explore why healing is often less about leveling up and more about releasing what's been holding us back. Ready to do the work and go deeper in your own healing? Book a consultation call with us or find Dave’s course here: Dave:

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51:55

Ep.112 Why understanding emotional bandwidth matters

All of You ·

2026/06/15

In this episode, we explore the role emotional bandwidth plays in healthy relationships and why timing can matter just as much as communication. We talk about the importance of checking in with your partner before diving into difficult conversations and recognizing that everyone's emotional, mental, and physical capacity shifts throughout different seasons of life.We also discuss what it looks like to be vulnerable enough to ask for support, how to navigate moments when your partner doesn't have

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52:32

Ep.111 When to walk away

All of You ·

2026/06/08

Relationships aren’t meant to stay the same forever and sometimes that leaves us wondering whether we’re being called to lean in, set stronger boundaries, or walk away. In this episode, we explore the difficult questions that arise when relationships change, needs evolve, and growth takes people in different directions. We talk about how to recognize when a relationship is no longer serving you, what it means to grow apart, how healthy boundaries can create clarity and connection, and why confidence

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46:23

Ep.110 Doing the work, but still struggling in...

All of You ·

2026/06/01

Healing isn't a straight line. Sometimes growth looks like moving forward, and sometimes it looks like finding yourself back in an old pattern you thought you'd already worked through.In this episode, we're talking about what happens when healing feels messy, why regression is a normal part of growth, and how these moments can impact our relationships. We explore how to navigate setbacks with compassion, communicate through them with your partner, and use them as opportunities for deeper awareness

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50:25

Ep.109 The art of hard conversations

All of You ·

2026/05/25

Communication is one of the biggest things that can either build connection or slowly break it down in relationships. In this episode, Shiv and Dave have an honest conversation about what actually makes communication healthy, why so many of us struggle to express what we feel, and how understanding yourself is a huge part of being able to communicate well with someone else. They dive into emotional awareness and the difference between reacting versus truly communicating. This episode is a reminder

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50:16

Ep.108 What good communication actually looks like

All of You ·

2026/05/18

Communication is one of the biggest things that can either build connection or slowly break it down in relationships. In this episode, Shiv and Dave have an honest conversation about what actually makes communication healthy, why so many of us struggle to express what we feel, and how understanding yourself is a huge part of being able to communicate well with someone else.They dive into emotional awareness and the difference between reacting versus truly communicating. This episode is a reminder

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