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PODCAST

Proxy with Yowei Shaw

It’s the knot you can’t untangle - a problem so unique, it makes you feel alone. But what if you could talk to someone who gets it? On Proxy, we find just the person you were looking for, the person who can help you get a little less stuck. It’s not therapy - it’s emotional investigative journalism™️. Yowei Shaw, former host of Invisibilia, at your service. New cases every other Tuesday. ----------Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely mostly on listeners. To support emotional

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All Episodes

10:24

How This Introvert Ally Gets Along with Introverts...

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/10/14

How close are we to getting to 1000 paying Patreon members so we can cover the costs of making a year two?!Plus, a conversation with introvert ally (and extrovert) Jennifer Kahnweiler on the changes she's made to get along better with the introverts in her life. To listen to the full exclusive premium episode, consider joining our Patreon starting at $5 a month. You’ll get ad-free episodes, exclusive premium episodes, access to the chat, and other goodies. To just get our newsletter, join

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44:26

The First Ever Extrovert-Introvert Cage Match

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/10/07

A historic step in extrovert-introvert relations i.e. a proxy bloodbath roundtable with 2 extroverts and 2 introverts airing our grievances about each other. From the episode: Learn more about Aparna Nancherla, read her book Unreliable Narrator, and follow her on Instagram @aparnapkin Learn more about Ryan Letts at Pando Integration Coaching Learn more about Jennifer Kahnweiler, listen to her podcast Introvert Ally, and read her book The Genius of Opposites This is a special membership

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41:04

An Estrangement Mystery

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/09/30

At the heart of many family estrangements lies a mystery. Adult kids insist they’ve told their parents why they’re walking away, while parents say they don’t understand. Why is it sometimes so hard for parents to hear their kids? And how to get through?From the episode: Learn more about Becca Bland and her work with families and people surviving estrangement Learn more about Joshua Coleman, subscribe to his newsletter Family Troubles, and read his book New Rules of Estrangement Learn

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01:00:13

JC's Kids Won't Talk To Her

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/09/23

The case of the mom who doesn’t understand, and the daughter who’s done explaining.From the episode: Learn more about Chess Dugas, subscribe to her YouTube channel The Scapegoat Club, and follow her on TikTok Learn more about Joshua Coleman, subscribe to his newsletter Family Troubles, and read his book New Rules of Estrangement Help us get to 1500 paying Patreon members by Oct. 9th to cover the costs of making another year of emotional investigative journalism!Proxy is an independent

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55:59

Alex and the Impossible Ask

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/09/09

Alex used to host a huge podcast (Reply All). He now makes a new independent show called Hyperfixed. He loves making it. Only problem is, Alex now has to ask for money all the time to survive, which he hates doing.From the episode: Listen to Alex Goldman's new podcast Hyperfixed Learn more about Haley Bash and Donor Organizer Hub, a support network for people who fundraise for under-resourced causes The Accidental Fundraiser, Haley's step-by-step guide to raising money for your

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31:53

Sandy and the Silence

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/08/26

Ever since the election, Sandy Ernest Allen has been clocking a strange silence from cis people about trans rights. So Sandy reached into the void to hear what the silence had to say.From the episode: Learn more about Sandy Ernest Allen and his work Sandy's newsletter What's Helping Today For suggestions on how to support trans people, read"To Cis People Who Feel Despair" Follow Sandy on Bluesky @sandyernestallen and see the post Support Sandy's writing with a tip:

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56:47

Overthinking about Narcissism (from Magical...

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/08/05

Is it just us, or does American culture have narcissism fever? Are we becoming more narcissistic? Or are we now over-using and misusing this term to the point of meaninglessness? Wait, is obsessing about other people's narcissism its own kind of narcissism? In this Magical Overthinkers episode, host Amanda Montell settles in for an illuminating chat with psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula, author of the New York Times bestseller "It's Not You." From the episode: Subscribe to the Magical

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30:49

Proxy Conversations with Sexual Offenders?

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/07/29

A conversation with Dr. Alissa Ackerman about her restorative justice work on the frontlines of Me Too, using proxy-like conversations. This is a Patreon exclusive bonus episode we're releasing on the main feed. If you want to hear more conversations like this, consider joining our Patreon. From the episode: Learn more about Dr. Alissa Ackerman and her organization Ampersands Restorative Justice Read Alissa's book Healing from Sexual Violence: The Case for Vicarious Restorative

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19:41

The Science of Trusting Your Intuition (from Science...

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/07/17

We'll be back with a new episode in two weeks. In the meantime, enjoy this episode from our friends at Science of Happiness. When we’re deep in burnout, even the simplest decisions can feel overwhelming. A conversation about slowing down, listening inward, and what it takes to rebuild trust in your inner knowing on the other side of exhaustion. From the episode:Follow Science of Happiness on Instagram @scienceofhappinesspod Subscribe to the podcast: https://pod.link/1340505607 Learn more

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40:30

Zakiya Used to Be So Fun

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/07/15

The case of the people person who fell out of love with people. From the episode: Learn more about Zakiya Gibbons Follow Zakiya on Instagram @zak_sauce Learn more about Dr. William Chopik and his research Follow Bill on Bluesky @Chops310 or X @Chops310 To hear Zakiya get more help on her conundrum and learn about the science of intuition, check out her Science of Happiness podcast episode coming this Thursday. On Science of Happiness, U.C. Berkeley psychologist Dr. Dacher Keltner invites

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12:27

How to Break Out of 'Narrative Autopilot' [TEASER]

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/07/08

Yowei doesn't have an internal narrator telling stories about her life - at least a voice she can hear in her head. She talks to psychology professor Jonathan Adler about what this means and what anyone can do to strengthen their self-narrator, if they wanted to. To listen to the full bonus episode, sign up to become a Patreon member starting at $5 per month. You’ll get ad-free episodes, monthly exclusive bonus interviews, and other goodies.From the episode: Learn more about Jonathan

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56:30

Amanda and the Nonstop Narrator

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/07/01

The case of Amanda, a writer whose internal monologue won't stop narrating her life, instead of just letting her live it.From the episode: Read Amanda Montell's books The Age of Magical Overthinking, Cultish, and Wordslut Listen to Amanda's podcasts Magical Overthinkers and Sounds Like a Cult Follow Amanda on Instagram @amanda_montell Learn more about Jonathan Adler's work Follow Jonathan on X @JonathanMAdler, Bluesky @jadler.bsky.social, and LinkedIn Proxy is an independent podcast

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12:32

Decoding the Feelings of People with Alzheimer's...

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/06/24

When someone with Alzheimer's gets upset about something that isn't actually happening, it can be easy to dismiss their feelings. But what if we approached those feelings not as problems to get rid of, but mysteries to solve? In this bonus episode, psychologist Claudia Drossel unpacks the feelings of people with Alzheimer's and how to decode them to use as a guide to give better care.To listen to the full bonus episode, sign up to become a Patreon member. You’ll get ad-free episodes,

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53:53

Brian Can't Stop Fact-checking His Mother-In-Law

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/06/17

The case of Brian, a journalist whose mother-in-law has Alzheimer's. Even though Brian knows she can’t help misremembering things, he can’t stop losing his patience with her, and with himself. From the episode: Listen to Brian Reed's podcast Question Everything Follow Brian on Instagram @brihreed and X @BriHReed Caregiving resources from Claudia Drossel Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going,

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55:30

Is it time to break up the band?

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/06/03

The case of Evan and Chris, best friends who love playing music together. But after the band suffers a terrible tragedy, they find themselves unable to regain their momentum. We pair them up with another musician who’s all too familiar with the neverending drama that comes with being in a band with friends. From the episode: Listen to The Superweaks and the single "Blindside" from their new record The Superweaks Superweekly Supercast episode where Yowei stumbles into the case Follow them

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43:16

Aparna and the Self-Loathing Introvert

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/05/20

For a long time, Yowei saw her introversion as a character flaw to fix. She gets advice from comedian (and fellow introvert) Aparna Nancherla about how to stop wishing for personality puberty to hit.From the episode: Read Aparna's book Unreliable Narrator: Me, Myself, and Imposter Syndrome Learn more about Aparna Follow her on Instagram @aparnapkin Upcoming shows: Amphibian Theater in Fort Worth, TX on May 22-23 and French Broad River Brewery in Asheville, NC on June 14 Quiet: The

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48:08

Mic Chooses the Wrong Life

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/05/06

The case of Mic, who feels like he defied his fate and now has no purpose in life. We find someone uniquely able to help him break out of his regret loop. From the episode: Follow Mic Nguyen on Instagram @nicepantsbro and subscribe to his podcast Asian Not Asian Read Amy Summerville's paper, one of the most cited articles on regret ----------Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider

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53:13

Bisexual Wife Guy

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/04/22

The case of the bisexual wife guy who got dumped. In this episode, we find a proxy to stand in for a listener's ex - another queer woman who left her straight relationship. From the episode: Hanna Rosin is a journalist and the host of many podcasts, including Radio Atlantic (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/radio-atlantic/id1258635512) and chutzpod! (www.chutzpod.com) Follow Hanna on X @hannarosin and Instagram @hannarosin Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To

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17:59

The Utility of Self-Delusion (and Big Show Update)

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/03/19

Yowei shares exciting show news and goes on a self-delusion bender with the team at Proxy HQ. Is she being delusional? Or is delusion just necessary for starting any new project?From the episode: Useful Delusions: The Power & Paradox of the Self-Deceiving Brain, by Shankar Vedantam: www.hiddenbrain.org/books Radiotopia from PRX: www.radiotopia.fm Episode credits: Produced by Yowei Shaw Edited by John DeLore Mixed by Kyle Pulley To help this independent show exist, consider joining

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35:47

Presenting: Alternate Realities (from NPR's Embedded)

Proxy with Yowei Shaw ·

2025/03/06

Conspiracy theories have been gaining traction all the way to the highest seats of power. So, are there emotional dynamics at play that we could understand to be able to do something about it? Last year, Zach Mack’s dad sent him a strange email, asking to bet $10,000 to settle once and for all who was correct and who was the brainwashed one. From NPR’s Embedded podcast, this is episode 2 of the Alternate Realities series: Down the Rabbit Hole. From the episode: Listen to the rest of the

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